Real Vampires Hate Skinny Jeans
Page 55

 Gerry Bartlett

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He laughed, loud and long, hugging me until I gasped. “Oh, babe, you so have me pegged. I figured I’d go skulking around the lake in a black satin cape. Not sure about the mask.”
I grinned and traced his smile with a fingertip. “No, a mask would be a crime. You’re too pretty for that.”
“But not pretty enough to keep you here?” He nipped my finger with a fang.
“I’ve got to do this, Ray.”
“Will you come back?” He leaned against the railing, back to the lake. “What if Blade wants you to stay there with him?”
“I have a shop here. A life. I’ll be back.” I turned to look out at the lake. “And Jerry’s parents live at the castle.” I shuddered. “We aren’t exactly best buds.”
“Their loss.” Ray leaned over and kissed my cheek. “Take care, Glory girl. Promise?”
“Sure. You do the same.” I watched him head inside then heard the piano. It was a sad melody, but beautiful. I walked down to his boat dock just as Ray started to sing. He’d be in his own world now, writing down the melody, adjusting the lyrics. I envied him that creative ability.
I stopped to stare out at the lake. I’d miss this, even if the water did still terrify. When the water rippled and a head emerged, I wasn’t even surprised.
“Glory, you’ve got to come with me. To the other side of this lake.” Aggie pulled herself up onto the dock. She was naked and didn’t bother to cover herself. If I’d had her perfect body, I’d have flaunted it too.
“Why?” I stepped back when she reached for me with a wet hand. Aggie actually looked desperate as she flung her hair behind her back. Too much of a good thing if you know what I mean. I looked away to peer at the dark lake.
“Achelous is meeting all the Siren sisters and Circe at Ray’s old house in a few minutes. Please. This is our chance for freedom and it was your idea. You have to be there to help us.”
“Are you kidding? He’ll kill me.” I backed away from her.
“I’m not giving you a choice.” And with that she grabbed me and jerked me into the water.
Nineteen
I’m sure they heard my scream on every side of the lake. That is before water rushed into my mouth. After that I just concentrated on keeping my head up. Aggie had morphed into her half-fish form, what mortals called a mermaid. She was cutting through the water at warp speed and dragging me by one arm. Obviously she didn’t care how I fared as I hit the waves behind her.
I sent her a mental message to bleepin’ slow down. That earned me a laugh and a leap into the air that made me gasp and swallow a half gallon of lake when we hit the water again. My curses were drowned out when she did a deep dive that reminded me I didn’t have to breathe at all. Oh, yeah, we were having a great time.
When we surfaced again I could see the burned-out shell of Ray’s old dock in the distance. Thank the goddess. Geez, now I was even thinking like Aggie. Just as well since I was about to meet the sisters. I shuddered to imagine a whole gaggle of Sirens. If I lived through this picnic, I was shifting and flying home. Good idea. I tried to shift right then and felt a burning sensation that meant my circuits were down. Weird and totally a new feeling that made me want to throw up all that lake water.
“Okay, put down your feet. You can walk in from here.” Aggie stopped and gave herself legs again.
To my relief I could touch down, though the bodysurfing adventure had me staggering. I looked back but couldn’t even see the shore or the lights from Ray’s house. I hoped he hadn’t heard my shriek and jumped into his cigarette boat thinking to rescue me. No way did I want him to meet Achelous. But if Laurie showed up and went tiger… Well, it was a nice fantasy anyway.
I made an ungraceful landing on the rocky shore, scraped my knee and tore a hole in my favorite black pants. I’d lost my slingbacks in the lake and the rocks bit into the soles of my feet as I staggered behind Aggie. At least it looked like we were the first to arrive. I wrung out my hair as I collapsed on a nearby boulder.
“What a wimp.” Aggie dragged my top down where it had ridden up to expose my tummy. “I wish you could do that thing where you make yourself dry clothes. You look horrible.” She, of course, had already put herself into a fresh outfit and had dried and fluffed her hair.
“As if I care.” I did close my eyes and give the transformation thing a shot. Dry hair, a new pair of designer jeans like Aggie wore and a sweater to match my eyes would be swell. I looked down. No go. Screw it. “I don’t want to look appealing for the Storm God anyway.” I wiped my face with my hands and saw black mascara on them.
Aggie just shook her head. “You’re right. Stick with the pitiful look. You’ve got raccoon eyes, no lipstick and could be a drowned reject from The Biggest Loser. Achy won’t give you a second glance.”
“Thanks. Oh, hello, looks like we have company.” Ghostly figures began to materialize around us. The sisters, I assumed. As I watched they solidified into beautiful women, perfect in every way. They were all different heights and color combos, but their figures were poster worthy. Thank God they hadn’t arrived naked since I didn’t think I could take so much blatant beauty on full display. Instead, they were dressed fit to kill—oops, bad analogy. But obviously these get-togethers were an excuse to try to outdress each other. The clothing budgets they had boggled my mind as they greeted each other with hugs, then gathered around me.
“Gloriana.” They breathed my name then poked and prodded me as if to test for doneness. I just let it go. If I’d once looked like a member of this club, no wonder they were having a hard time believing their eyes. One of them burst into noisy sobs.
“Ariane, please. Nothing can be done now. Forget about it.” Several of the sisters clustered around her.
“But we were best friends and she doesn’t even know me.” Ariane, the one who could cry and her eyes and nose didn’t even turn pink, approached me. She rocked a turquoise silk wrap dress and peep-toe lizard pumps as she picked her way across the beach. “Gloriana, you really don’t recognize me?” She held out her hand. “Please, take my hand. I want to show you something.”
“Sorry, but as far as I can remember, we’ve never met.” I did like her smile. She seemed friendly with her pretty dark eyes and deep dimples. She was a brunette and petite, about Flo’s size. In fact, she reminded me of Flo and I think my best bud had that same dress in yellow. Which gave me the heebie-jeebies. I took a chance and let her hold my hand.
Suddenly pictures formed in my mind. This girl and I laughed on a beach and then dove into the waves. We weren’t shy and both swam naked, which seemed to be the Siren preference. I guess we did it so we could sprout our fish tails when we felt like it. But I seemed to have the same perfect body she had. My hip issues were another reason to hate Achelous.
Like switching channels, we were suddenly in another scene, in a palace at the bottom of the sea. We were at a banquet and sat, down the table from Achelous. He gestured to us and we went to him together. We laughed behind his back but were happy to serve him. This time we wore sheer togas that left nothing to the imagination. Our jewelry was heavy and worth a fortune. Hmm. For dessert we did things to and with Achy and each other… I flushed and jerked my hand from hers.
“Did you see? How close we were, Gloriana?” Ariane’s eyes shimmered.
“Yes, I’m sorry. I really don’t remember any of my Siren past. I hope you found another friend.” I stiffened when she threw her arms around me and hugged me.
“Up to your old tricks, I see, Gloriana. Keep your hands off my women.” Achelous roared the order and the heavens shook with his displeasure.
“Sire, she did not willingly touch me. We were just…” Ariane bowed and scurried back to join her sisters clustered on the other side of the clearing.
“I had tricks? Didn’t know. But then you did erase my memories.” I knew I should keep my mouth shut but I hated the way the sisters quaked at the sound of his voice. Even now he froze Ariane where she stood before he stalked over to place a proprietary hand on her shoulder.
“Yes. And I can do it to any one of you females here. Do you doubt me?” Achelous actually spoke softly this time and it was even scarier than his thunder. Of course the crack of a lightning bolt helped punctuate his threat.
“I think they’ve suffered enough at your hands, Achelous.” Circe shimmered into view with her usual display of clear skies and twinkling stars.
“What business is it of yours how I treat my Sirens? Why are you here?” Achelous looked ready to start storming.
“Your Sirens begged me to intervene. They’ve asked for my help.” Circe’s smile was obviously meant to goad Achelous and it did the job. He whirled and pinned me with a gaze of pure hatred.
“I know where this is coming from. Gloriana, have you been meddling? Inciting my Sirens to rebellion? I thought I heard whispers when I was at play.” He jerked Aggie to his side with a harsh word. “Confess. Has Gloriana been filling your head with seditious plots?”
“Don’t blame Gloriana, Achelous. You are high-handed. Ill suited to rule a group of women like the sisterhood of Sirens. Your methods are abusive.” Circe opened her arms. “Come to me, ladies, and I will see that you are well treated.”
“What? You think to steal them from me?” Achelous’s face turned red. “Take one step, you ungrateful bunch of females, and I will strip the song from each of you.” This stopped the women in their expensive tracks and they sank to their knees in the dirt. I gasped. Designer clothes deserved better. But of course he’d pull out that trump card.
“You will not.” Circe waved her arms and a golden band of twinkling stars shimmered around the ladies. What? Were we in a Disney movie? But obviously this was a power move because Achelous looked ready to spit sparks.
“The Sirens are under my protection until we get this settled. Don’t think I won’t go to Zeus about this, Achelous. The very fact that the Sirens asked me to take them on will displease him. He’s already unhappy that you and I need him to mediate our disputes.”