Real Vampires Hate Their Thighs
Page 33

 Gerry Bartlett

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When I stepped into the living room, Flo was going over a slick brochure. When she saw me, she quickly tucked it into her purse. Hmm. So she was thinking about getting into some of Ian’s goodies. I wish I honestly believed they were 100 percent safe. But the roller-coaster ride his supplements had taken me on didn’t exactly inspire a testimonial, and Flo knew that. Her decision. Still, I’d have felt better if she’d tossed the brochure into the trash can.
“I’m ready. Let’s do this.” I gestured toward the powder room where Nathan had set up my scale. It was going to be a tight squeeze to get both Ian and me in there. No way was Valdez going to fit too. He wasn’t going to like that.
Ian picked up his clipboard. “It’s also time to measure you again.” He looked in the bathroom. “After I weigh you, we can do that in the bedroom.”
“Good idea.” Actually, I couldn’t wait to see how many inches I’d lost. My jeans now bagged in the seat, and the T-shirt was loose. Hell, even my bra cup didn’t have overflow anymore. I was on cloud nine.
“You’re not closing that bathroom door.” Valdez stood in the doorway. “No one will be able to see your freakin’ weight, Glory. I’ll stand guard out here, back to the scale. Will that work for you?”
“Fine. Do what you have to, just don’t look.” I turned to Ian. “Okay, I’m ready.” I stepped on the scale. I watched breathlessly as Ian adjusted the weights. It took so long I finally closed my eyes.
“Okay, you can look now.”
“Oh, my God!” I jumped off the scale and straight into his arms. I planted a kiss on his lips that sent Valdez into a growling fit. Tough. I was grateful.
“Thanks, Glory.” Ian set me down between him and my bodyguard. Brittany was now there too in case V needed backup.
I reached back and slipped the weights to zero, then wiped at my eyes. “I lost eight more pounds!” I leaned down and hugged Valdez next. “Can you believe it? That’s a total of—” My mind went blank.
“Thirteen pounds.” Ian wrote on his chart. “I think it’s time you went shopping, Glory, for smaller sizes. Good thing Florence is here. She says she’s an expert shopper.”
“Glory, he’s right. Your pants are falling off of you. Your butt’s gone.” Brittany hugged me next. “Flo, quit reading that stuff and come see. Glory’s shrinking right before our eyes!”
I heard a squeal, then I was enveloped in a hug that made my lungs hurt. Trina’s feeding had helped me a lot, but didn’t have the power a healing sleep would have. I still felt my stomach muscles, and every step reminded me I had painful issues with my feet.
Ian smiled. “You’ve been an excellent client, Glory. Despite a few glitches, your weight loss has been truly remarkable. I should have asked you to do a video diary for me.”
I shook my head. “No thanks, Ian. From what I saw of Sarah’s, those things are, uh, a little too revealing.”
He shrugged. “Too late for that now anyway. But look, I have a little gift for you. And you too, Florence.” He walked over and pulled what seemed to be two thin white laptops out of his bag.
“What are these?” I took one and Flo the other.
“I don’t like computers, Ian. Since Richard has learned to work with them, that’s all he wants to do. Google, Google, Google.” Flo made a face. “I hate this Google man.”
I wasn’t too excited about a computer either. I used one for my business. “Flo, Google’s not a man; he’s a search engine.”
Flo gave me a blank look.
Ian grinned. “Just push the button and open it, Glory. You’ll see, Florence. You’ll love this.”
I pushed a button and the thing popped open. It looked like a regular laptop but without the keyboard. “What is this?”
“Turn it on here.” Ian pushed a red button. “Hold it up like this. Now look into it.”
“Oh, wow!” It was like looking into a mirror. I showed it to Flo. “Check it out, Flo.”
“It’s me. Che bella, eh, Glory? Why didn’t you tell me I have lipstick on my teeth?” She began scrubbing with her finger. “You made one of these for me?” She held it up and smiled. “I love it! How you do it?”
“It’s basically a webcam with a high-resolution color monitor.” Ian popped the other one open and handed it to me since clearly Flo wasn’t letting go of the one she had. She’d pulled out her makeup bag and went to work on her eyeliner.
I smiled at my video and it smiled back. Cool. This was a serious breakthrough and I was temporarily mesmerized. I’d already realized Ian was brilliant, but he’d just moved up to idol status in my book. I tore myself away from myself and carefully closed the thing.
“This is an amazing gift. I don’t get it, Ian. First all this personal attention and now this. What’s up?”
“Come on, Glory. Mr. Caine paid for first-class service. That’s what you’re getting. I’d think you’d be used to it.” Ian just kept smiling.
“Sure I am.” Yeah, right. “But this”—I hugged my new toy—“is way more than service.”
“I like you, Glory. And I figure your success is going to bring me more business when your vampire friends see you on TV at the Grammys. Consider this a thank-you gift.” He nodded toward Flo, who’d moved on to renewing her lipstick. “My products are expensive and I cater to an affluent clientele. It’s clear that’s the kind of company you keep. Just spread the word that you were satisfied with my program and I’ll be more than repaid for that bit of nonsense.”
“You call this nonsense?” Flo finally shut her “mirror” gently. “It’s fantastico! I must have at least two more. No, make that three. Can I order them in colors?” Flo’s eyes glowed as she pulled out a credit card. “Please, signore, tell me you will sell me more.”
Ian winked at me as if to say his marketing ploy was paying off already, then began to answer Flo’s questions. After taking her order and measuring me (inches gone everywhere—wow!), he and his minions finally left and I went to put my “mirror” in a safe place. I also sighed with relief we’d made it through without Jerry showing up. Where was he, though? Plotting Ian’s takedown? And was he staying away because he was too busy or still furious with me for consorting with his enemy?
I sat on the side of the bed and stuffed my poor feet into high heels, biting back a scream. I couldn’t let Jerry kill Ian. Not after the MacDonald genius had helped me lose an incredible thirteen pounds! Too bad that once I got off Ian’s stuff, those pounds would be right back where they thought they belonged.
Damn. Three days until the red carpet and the Grammys. I opened Ian’s “mirror” and tried to see as much of myself as I could. God, I loved this new body. What if I wanted to keep it permanently? Yeah, right.
I looked at the bottles of supplements Ian had left for me. They scared the hell out of me. Exercise, dangerous nightmares, sleepwalking and who knew what effects from this new brew he’d given me to try. Could I abuse my body like that forever? And how much would a maintenance program cost me? I was an independent working girl who planned to break up with one rich man and had probably already burned her bridge with another one.
Oh, and if that Campbell guy managed to kill the MacDonald one? Then the vamp magic for weight loss would die with him. Now, there was a reason to end a feud if I ever heard one. I needed to call Jerry and do something to rebuild that bridge. But what? This was one problem that I was afraid even my sexiest moves couldn’t fix.
Eleven
“I canceled my workout session with Bill. I decided I don’t need it after that run with Trina.” I headed for the elevators with Flo.
“So right, girlfriend. It was never a good idea. What’s that kind of thing going to get you?” She punched the down button. “Pain, you said. Ian’s program is working. That’s all you need.” She grinned. “I can’t believe how much weight you lost so fast. We celebrate. Buy you something pretty. My treat.”
The elevator doors opened and we both jumped back. Jerry and Richard stood there and neither of them wore happy faces.
“Amante!” Flo moved first, pulling Richard out of the elevator car and into the hallway. “What are you doing here?”
“I got your message. What the hell are you doing tackling Ian MacDonald on your own?” He looked up and down the hall like he was checking for lurking MacDonald guards to take down.
“We weren’t on our own, eh, Valdez, Brittany?” Flo waved her hand at my two guards. “And, as you can see, we’re perfectly fine. Glory had her treatment and we’re on our way to shop. Look at her. Isn’t she tiny?”
Richard did look but didn’t seem overwhelmed.
“Forget shopping. We need to talk.” Jerry took my arm and pulled me toward the suite.
“Isn’t that my line?” I jerked free. “No need to get physical. Why don’t we start over? You say, ‘Hi, Glory. How are you?’ I answer, ‘Oh, I’ll live. But, gee, Jerry, last time we saw each other you practically called me an idiot. Then you didn’t bother to call, just showed up here and started throwing your muscle around. What’s the deal?’ ”
“Sorry if you don’t like my approach, Gloriana.” Jerry glanced at Richard, who’d obviously sent him a mental warning that this approach wasn’t too swift either.
I just stood there, tapping my aching toe and waiting for him to get a clue.
Flo studied her nails. “Is this going to take long? Glory needs to try on some things for her new little size.” She grinned at me. “Major fun, eh, mia amica?”
“A lot more fun than standing here in the hall.” I glanced at Valdez and Brittany, then back at Jerry. “Do I have to ask you again? Guess so. What’s the deal, Jerry?”