Real Vampires Live Large
Page 12

 Gerry Bartlett

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“Relax, Jer. We’ll get along.” I patted his cheek and he did relax his jaw a bit. “But I think this is totally unnecessary. ”
“I need to know you’re safe, Gloriana, or I can’t leave.” His arm tightened around me and he gave me a tender look that melted any contrariness I’d been building up.
“Okay. Okay.” I leaned against him. “Just hurry back. This is temporary.”
“Of course.” He dropped a kiss on my head. “Will, Glory is in your care. One hair on her head comes to harm and there will be no bailout. Understand?”
“Bailout?” Mara tossed her head. “Surprise, surprise. You’ve got yourself in another financial bind, haven’t you? At least you had the good sense not to come running to me this time.”
“Fat lot of good it would do me.” Will heaved a sigh. “My own sister wouldn’t throw me a bone if I was starving.” He sidled up to Blade. “Speaking of bones. We don’t have to eat dog food and crap like that, do we? I’ve got standards.”
Valdez perked up, obviously sensing an ally. “No way. I had a rib eye night before last. You just tell Glory what you like to eat and she’s on top of it. Though she doesn’t really cook. She can barely panfry a steak without burning it. She just doesn’t get the concept of rare.”
“If someone didn’t insist on this dog form, I’d cook for both of us. I’ve studied at the Cordon Bleu in Paris. Night classes. When I get the money together, I plan to open a restaurant.”
“You’re vampire, aren’t you? How can you stand to eat?” Could everybody eat but me? Life is so not fair.
“Kilpatrick vampires are born, not made, and can do some things made vamps can’t. Didn’t you know that, Gloriana? ” Mara gave me a sympathetic look, like only an idiot could have been around this crowd for hundreds of years and still not have a clue.
“Sure I knew that.” Not. I probably was an idiot. But I’d spent most of those hundreds of years trying to be anything but vampire.
“Will is to do your bidding, Glory.” Jerry gave him a hard look. “If he is too much of a problem, I’ll replace him.”
Mara shook her head. “Good thing you’re poor, Glory. Will goes through cash like Valdez goes through Twinkies.”
“Hey, I need my strength. And I want to know why he can talk like that and I have to do it inside people’s heads.”
Valdez leaned against my knee. “Though if the number two guy tries talking like that in front of mortals, you’ll straighten him out, won’t you, Glory?”
I rubbed Valdez behind his ears. “Yes, puppy. He’ll have to follow the same rules you do. And you’ll always be number one with me.”
“Thanks a lot.” Blade’s arm tightened around my waist. “I thought I was number one.”
I looked up and smiled. “Let me clarify. Valdez, you’re my number one bodyguard. Blade, you’re my number one—”
“Spare me.” Mara rolled her eyes. “I’ve had quite enough of Gloriana’s drama. Westwood killed MacTavish. My husband. I see no reason to wait for tomorrow night. Shift with me now, Jeremiah, and we can be in Africa before sunrise. ” Mara looked down and gasped. “William Allan Kilpatrick, what do you have in your mouth?”
Will looked up from his new chew toy, one of Mara’s Prada sandals. “There’s something very tasty about a high-priced shoe.”
“I’ll kill you, you hound.” Mara charged, Will lunged and the two of them ran out of the room, Mara screeching and Will laughing like a hyena.
“That was a surprise.” I sat on the foot of the bed again. “Will Kilpatrick. I don’t know if this is going to work out.”
“I probably do need backup, Glory. Think about it. I’m on duty twenty-four seven. Sure, I get a nap now and then, but I can tell you that years of that kind of stress takes its toll. I could have slept through the whole fire thing. I was that exhausted.” Valdez had obviously decided to join the dark side, especially if it might mean a better menu.
“Two dogs?” I collapsed on the bed. “Jeremiah Campbell you are a wicked, wicked man.”
“That’s my cue. I’m outta here.” Valdez ran out the door, which slammed behind him.
“The dog’s learning.”
“Yes, but are you? Why do you always have to make these major decisions about my life without consulting me?” I tried hard to hang on to my mad, but Blade never had put on a shirt. And a half -naked Blade did stupid things to my mind. Like wiping out my logical thinking.
“I couldn’t consult you. You would have said no.”
I stopped just as I was about to untie my robe again. “Damned right.” Controlling man. Always. One reason we’d parted as often as we’d gotten together. “Take off those jeans and come back to bed. I’m going to punish you for your impertinence. ”
“You promise?” Jerry grinned as he shucked his jeans and leaped on top of me.
"Okay, you’ve distracted me long enough. I’ve been an idiot long enough. Mara’s right about that. Made vampires versus born vampires. What other differences do I need to know about?” I watched Jerry get dressed. He was leaving tonight and I’d given him a send-off guaranteed to help him remember me during those long, hot nights in Africa. Jerry zipped his jeans. “I’m pretty sure we went over this the first time I took you home to meet mum and dad.”
“You probably did.” And as an actress from humble beginnings, I’d been too busy trying to please the laird and lady of Castle Campbell to pay much attention. Of course I hadn’t pleased the parents. Jerry and I never married for one thing. And I was what I was. Not a Scottish heiress like Mara, in other words.
I’d met plenty of vamps over the years but it’s not considered polite to ask about one’s origins. Some vamps, like me, came to the deal willingly and saved regrets for later. Others had been forced into the life. You think I whine. So vamps tend to live in the moment. Usually. Speaking of the moment . . .
Jerry pulled on a snap-front cotton Western shirt. He’d been going for a cowboy look to please me because I had a yen for a cowboy type, now that I lived in Texas and all. The yellow looked good with his dark hair and eyes, really good. He left it open. Even better.
“The Kilpatrick, Mara’s father, is the one who made my father vampire in the first place.”
“So started the family from hell.” I muttered it, but nothing gets past Jerry’s vamp hearing.
“Now, Glory, the clan is quite fond of you. If you’d married me, they would have accepted you as part of the family.”
A big “if.” Jerry had popped that particular question about a century late as far as I was concerned. By then I’d spent way too much time with “the clan,” four brothers, all alpha males, and two sisters who could give Joan Rivers bitch lessons. And then there was dear Mama, who’d actually tried to stake me one cold winter night. But, hey, I don’t hold it against her. I just don’t plan to be in the same continent, let alone the same room, with the woman ever again.
“We had some issues. One being that I wasn’t part of a dynasty.” Like Mara. Or even MacTavish’s sister who Mama Campbell had really wanted for Jerry.
“I would never have married Tess MacTavish.” Jerry gave me a look, letting me know he’d really like me to get over this ancient jealousy.
“Quit reading my mind. And tell Tess she ’s off your potential bride list the next time you see her. Watch her reaction. ” Tess MacTavish put the vamp in vampire if you know what I mean. Men flocked. And she ’d always had a thing for Jerry. Hard to believe he was immune. I got another one of those looks. Time for a subject change. I watched Jerry run a leather belt through the loops on his jeans. “Is that a Gucci belt?” I know my leather goods.
“So Mara said. It’s a gift from her.” Jerry buckled it, then picked up his wallet from the dresser and slipped it in his back pocket, like he thought I wouldn’t notice it was Gucci too.
“What’s she doing giving you expensive presents?” This was serious. I gave Jerry the same thing every Christmas and birthday that we were seeing each other—my own too well-curved body. Hey, I’m on a budget. And I am enthusiastic. I usually tie a bow on myself somewhere interesting. Jerry loves it.
“I’m letting her stay with me and won’t accept payment. So she gives me gifts. It makes her feel better.”
“I’m sure.” I was also sure Jerry had no clue what a nice Gucci belt and wallet cost either. I wasn ’t telling him. “So born vampires can eat. Anything else?”
“They can eat and drink. Don’t let Will near strong spirits. He’s quite fond of whisky and doesn’t handle it well.” Jerry frowned, as if wondering if he’d done me any favors bringing Will on board. I wondered the same thing.
“I’ve seen Mara shift, use her strength, the regular vamp powers. Anything else?”
“Born vampires don’t turn until thirty or so. Before then they’re human and mortal. Can even have children. The Kilpatricks have lost many a bairn before the change.” Jerry was still frowning. “I’ve heard that every hundred years or so they can get fertile again. And if they mate with a mortal, the babe will be vampire.”
“Does Mara have children?” What a concept. The woman had about as much maternal instinct as a rabid bat.
“Aye. A daughter, Lily, with Mac before the change. We’ve not seen her for years. She and her parents had a falling out.” Jerry sat on the edge of the bed. “I’ve been searching for her. To let her know about her father. No luck so far.”
I put my hand on Jerry’s knee. “It’ll be a shock. Vampires are supposed to live forever.”
“Which is why I must go after Westwood. To avenge Mac and pay Westwood back for the harm he has done you.”