It was almost as if she was Verrine again, and she and Yenrieth were lying in a meadow together, soaking up the sun. She’d been so happy at times like that, and the only thing that would have made her happier was if she’d been sure he felt the same way about her as she felt about him.
Clinging to those precious memories, Harvester thrust her tongue between Reaver’s velvety lips. For a heart-sinking moment he did nothing, but when she flicked her tongue against his, he responded with a low moan that flowed through her like a caress.
Sliding her hands upward from his shoulders to his neck, she traced the tendons that strained under his skin and the veins that pounded beneath her fingertips. A rumble started low in her belly, the hunger she needed to take care of soon but that always grew worse when she was aroused.
The taste of Reaver’s blood had only whetted her appetite, and the thought of sinking her teeth into Reaver’s warm flesh and taking the ultimate nectar that composed an angel’s blood made her fangs throb and lengthen.
She’d been disgusted by the idea of feeding when she’d first fallen, but gradually, she’d learned to tolerate it. Then like it. And now it was a pleasure she looked forward to.
Especially if she got to feed from an angel.
She didn’t care that drinking from an angel brought out her evil side.
A shudder of anticipation ran through her, followed by unwelcome reservations. She no longer had to play fallen angel, did she? Yes, she was technically a True Fallen, and she had all the needs that came with it. But she was supposed to be a good guy underneath her evil veneer. Shouldn’t she be at least trying to be decent?
Reaver’s teeth pinched her bottom lip, gently, and all her self-doubt faded into the background.
“Reaver,” she whispered against his mouth.
The next thing she knew Reaver flipped her onto her back and slammed his heavy body on top of her. His smile was cold as he looked down at her.
“Come on, Harvester,” he said, his voice husky, unused, and so damned sexy even when he was trying to intimidate her. “Did you really think I’d let you get the upper hand?”
“Of course not,” she said bitterly. “The great Reaver doesn’t let anyone get the upper hand. He doesn’t let anyone in, does he?”
He frowned. “Where is that coming from?”
A sudden stab of anxiety pierced her gut. Where, indeed. She had no idea if Reaver let people in or not. And why in the realm of f**k would she care, let alone be bitter about it?
Something was happening to her, and whatever it was, she didn’t like it. She used to know exactly who and what she was. Even when she was hanging from hooks in Satan’s living room, she knew what she was, even if what she was amounted to nothing but a slab of meat.
But since the moment Reaver stormed into her life to rescue her, everything she knew was turned upside down. Was she good? Was she evil?
Only one thing was certain: For the first time in her life, she was lost.
Very little could confuse Reaver. Harvester not only confused him; she twisted him into knots. His body reacted to her even as his brain tried to make sense of the things she said and did. No one else had ever done that to him. At least, no one whom he could remember.
“Well?” he prompted. “What makes you think I don’t let people in?” She was right, but how did she know that?
“I don’t want to answer,” she said crisply. “Now who has the upper hand?”
She shoved against him, a halfhearted effort. She was testing the waters, determining if she was strong enough to unseat him. She wasn’t, even though his body was still recovering from the paralyzation and was numb from the thighs down. Everything above that was in full operational mode. Everything was working too well, in fact, leaving him breathless, hot, and aching after Harvester’s kiss.
“I’m still on top of you,” he said. “So I wouldn’t get too cocky.”
She arched under him, blatantly rubbing against his erection. Oh… yeah. Forbidden pleasure jolted him all the way to his balls.
“I’m not the cocky one.” She smiled, all innocence and sugar. “So now that you have me under you, what do you plan to do to me?”
Plan? Or want? “I don’t plan to do anything to you.” He started to push away, but she grasped his biceps, digging her nails into his skin to hold him.
“Wait.”
Tired of her games and her taunts, annoyed with himself for becoming aroused by the one person in the universe he knew would use it against him, he snapped. “What?”
Hurt darkened her eyes but was gone so fast he’d have missed it if he blinked. “Nothing. Get off me.” She shoved at him, this time in earnest, but he didn’t budge.
He made an effort to soften his tone this time. “Tell me what you wanted.”
“Fuck off.”
He looked down, trying to get a read on her, but he kept getting derailed by the dark circles under her eyes. She was healing from her torture experience, but far too slowly, and they might still have a long way to go.
“Tell me, Harvester, how did you perform Heavenly good deeds for five thousand years and not get caught?”
She laughed, but he failed to see what was so funny. “Easy. I didn’t perform any good deeds. I fell from Heaven in order to gain a position as the Horsemen’s Watcher and derail the Daemonica’s Apocalypse if and when the time came.” She dug her nails into his chest, and he swore she purred when he felt a twinge of pain. “If something wasn’t related in some way to the Apocalypse, I ignored it. It would look pretty suspicious if I ran around rescuing kittens and defending humans from demons now, wouldn’t it?” She writhed, struggling to escape his hold. “Release me.”
“I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what you want.”
“I don’t want your help.”
So damned stubborn. “You might not want my help, but you need it.” He shifted his weight and eased to the side, giving her some room so she wouldn’t feel trapped. “We need to work together to get out of here alive. You know that, right?”
She sprang away from him like a frightened rabbit and settled on her haunches a few feet away. “Of course I know that.” He thought her face was a shade paler than it had been a moment ago. “I just don’t like it. And I don’t trust you. I don’t understand why you would risk so much to rescue someone you hate.”
Because you watched over my children. Remembering why he was here erased all his animosity. She was difficult, volatile, and infuriating as hell, but he owed her a million times over, and so did every human and angel in existence. But could he risk telling her the truth? If what Raphael said about her hating Yenrieth was true, she’d blow a gasket if she found out Reaver was the very angel she detested.
Maybe he should test the waters a little.
“Wouldn’t you rescue someone you hated if they saved all mankind and prevented an apocalypse that would have killed countless angels?” he asked.
“No.”
“Not even if that someone was Yenrieth?”
She hissed, baring her fangs, and he knew Raphael hadn’t jacked him around on how she felt about Yenrieth.
“Especially not him.” Her hands clenched into white-knuckled fists. “Why would you even bring him up to me?”
“You gave up your wings to take care of his kids. He must have meant something to you, even if you hate him now.”
“He did mean something to me, but that was in the past. Now I would rather see him rot for all eternity than save his miserable soul,” she growled, and he wondered what he’d done to her to make her hate him that much. “So shut up about him and tell me why you did this. You’re not an angel of justice. You’re a battle angel.”
“So I can’t want to make sure someone who does a great service is rewarded for their actions?”
“Oh, I think you absolutely want that,” she said. “But it’s not your priority. You were bred for war, so it’s in your nature to write off people as collateral damage if their lives are sacrificed for the greater good. If the archangels didn’t want you to come, then they’re well aware that the greater good will be served by my being tortured for all eternity.” She stood in a fluid, lithe movement that drew his appreciative gaze. “So why would you, a battle angel who should consider me a casualty of war and an acceptable loss, risk starting a war to save someone you hate?”
“You aren’t an acceptable loss, and I don’t hate you,” he said, surprising even himself with his honesty. But that didn’t mean he liked her. His feelings for her were as complicated as the history between Heaven and hell.
Her snort of derision set his teeth on edge. “Even if you loved me, I wouldn’t understand why you saved me.”
“Have you ever loved someone?” he blurted out, and whoa, that came out of left field.
But suddenly, he wanted to know the answer. He couldn’t imagine her in a relationship, and he was beginning to wonder how prickly she’d been even as an angel. Who in their right mind would put up with her?
As Yenrieth, I must have.
The thought sucked the air right out of his lungs. It had popped into his head as easily and inexplicably as his question to her about loving someone. Being in Sheoul must be getting to him.
“Irrelevant,” she said. “You don’t love me, so that’s not why you did this.”
“It’s a simple question.”
“And I have a simple answer. Fuck off.” Harvester even offered him a helpful visual aid in the form of a hand gesture.
He flopped onto his back and stared up at the craggy ceiling. “If you keep saying that, you’ll forget how to talk like a polite person.” Something whacked him in the head. “Ow.” He sat up and glared at the stone wobbling next to him. “What was that for?”
“For fun.” She scooped up his backpack. “Are we leaving or what? I’m tired of waiting for Calder.”
Despite his curiosity, he welcomed the change of subject from past loves, because he definitely didn’t want to get into why he’d rescued her again. He wanted to tell her that he was the angel Yenrieth, to explain that the Horsemen were his children and he was grateful for what she’d done, but now wasn’t the time. He had a lot of questions about his past and who he’d been as Yenrieth, and until he broke down the massive wall around her, he couldn’t expect any real answers. If anything, giving her important information like that would hand her a huge advantage over him, and that was something he couldn’t risk. She was far too unpredictible and, likely, unstable after months in Satan’s dungeon.
Of course, Reaver thought she’d been unstable before her own father imprisoned her.
“We don’t know where Calder went.” He gestured to the far side of the cavern, where two different tunnels meant two different possibilities. “We could guess, but if we choose wrong, we’ll lose him.”
They couldn’t afford another loss. Reaver hadn’t known Matt well, but he hoped the guy was okay. Tavin, though… Reaver was going to steep in guilt until he got confirmation that the Sem had made it to Underworld General.
Harvester hadn’t moved.
“Harvester?”
She still didn’t move. In fact, he thought she might be shaking.
“Harvester,” he prompted, more urgently this time.
Her gaze flipped up to his. “We have to find him, Reaver.”
She licked her lips, and he caught a glimpse of her fangs, longer than usual, and he felt like a dolt. She needed to feed, and they were out of time.
He shot for a tone that wasn’t dripping with sympathy—she’d hate that—or that wasn’t overflowing with impatience. “You can feed from me.”
“No.” She backed up, crying out when she bumped her wing anchors into a stalactite that hung so low it nearly touched the ground. When she spoke again, her voice was laced with pain. “I might lose control. And it’s against Heavenly law for you to willingly give your blood for food.”
The control thing was an issue for sure, but since when did she care about Heavenly law? “As you’ve pointed out before, I tend to bend rules.”
“Bend? You wouldn’t be bending a rule. You’d be breaking it over the ass of an archangel.”
The visual almost made him laugh. “Don’t worry about that.” After what he’d done, what was one more broken law?
“I’m trying,” she said tightly, “to not make things worse for you with the archangels.”
He actually did laugh at that, even as he appreciated her concern. “I hit the height of worst when I rescued you.”
Her chin came up, and he braced himself for a mulish conversation. “I’m not feeding from you.”
He wasn’t worried about a broken rule that no one would find out about anyway. His concern was that drinking his blood could, potentially, drain his powers as it replenished hers. He could scarcely afford to lose any strength, and he wasn’t sure how much he could trust Harvester if she was significantly stronger than he was.
“Why are you being so obstinate? A year ago, you’d have jumped at the chance to suck me dry.”
“A year ago, I was pretending to be an evil bitch.”
“And now?”
“Now I don’t know what I am!” she shouted. “I used to know, and now I don’t, and it’s all your fault.”
Ah, damn. For so long after he’d lost his memory, he’d wandered aimlessly, not knowing who he’d been and unclear on who he was, other than an angel who had been given the boot from Heaven for saving the life of a human child who had been fated to die.
Clinging to those precious memories, Harvester thrust her tongue between Reaver’s velvety lips. For a heart-sinking moment he did nothing, but when she flicked her tongue against his, he responded with a low moan that flowed through her like a caress.
Sliding her hands upward from his shoulders to his neck, she traced the tendons that strained under his skin and the veins that pounded beneath her fingertips. A rumble started low in her belly, the hunger she needed to take care of soon but that always grew worse when she was aroused.
The taste of Reaver’s blood had only whetted her appetite, and the thought of sinking her teeth into Reaver’s warm flesh and taking the ultimate nectar that composed an angel’s blood made her fangs throb and lengthen.
She’d been disgusted by the idea of feeding when she’d first fallen, but gradually, she’d learned to tolerate it. Then like it. And now it was a pleasure she looked forward to.
Especially if she got to feed from an angel.
She didn’t care that drinking from an angel brought out her evil side.
A shudder of anticipation ran through her, followed by unwelcome reservations. She no longer had to play fallen angel, did she? Yes, she was technically a True Fallen, and she had all the needs that came with it. But she was supposed to be a good guy underneath her evil veneer. Shouldn’t she be at least trying to be decent?
Reaver’s teeth pinched her bottom lip, gently, and all her self-doubt faded into the background.
“Reaver,” she whispered against his mouth.
The next thing she knew Reaver flipped her onto her back and slammed his heavy body on top of her. His smile was cold as he looked down at her.
“Come on, Harvester,” he said, his voice husky, unused, and so damned sexy even when he was trying to intimidate her. “Did you really think I’d let you get the upper hand?”
“Of course not,” she said bitterly. “The great Reaver doesn’t let anyone get the upper hand. He doesn’t let anyone in, does he?”
He frowned. “Where is that coming from?”
A sudden stab of anxiety pierced her gut. Where, indeed. She had no idea if Reaver let people in or not. And why in the realm of f**k would she care, let alone be bitter about it?
Something was happening to her, and whatever it was, she didn’t like it. She used to know exactly who and what she was. Even when she was hanging from hooks in Satan’s living room, she knew what she was, even if what she was amounted to nothing but a slab of meat.
But since the moment Reaver stormed into her life to rescue her, everything she knew was turned upside down. Was she good? Was she evil?
Only one thing was certain: For the first time in her life, she was lost.
Very little could confuse Reaver. Harvester not only confused him; she twisted him into knots. His body reacted to her even as his brain tried to make sense of the things she said and did. No one else had ever done that to him. At least, no one whom he could remember.
“Well?” he prompted. “What makes you think I don’t let people in?” She was right, but how did she know that?
“I don’t want to answer,” she said crisply. “Now who has the upper hand?”
She shoved against him, a halfhearted effort. She was testing the waters, determining if she was strong enough to unseat him. She wasn’t, even though his body was still recovering from the paralyzation and was numb from the thighs down. Everything above that was in full operational mode. Everything was working too well, in fact, leaving him breathless, hot, and aching after Harvester’s kiss.
“I’m still on top of you,” he said. “So I wouldn’t get too cocky.”
She arched under him, blatantly rubbing against his erection. Oh… yeah. Forbidden pleasure jolted him all the way to his balls.
“I’m not the cocky one.” She smiled, all innocence and sugar. “So now that you have me under you, what do you plan to do to me?”
Plan? Or want? “I don’t plan to do anything to you.” He started to push away, but she grasped his biceps, digging her nails into his skin to hold him.
“Wait.”
Tired of her games and her taunts, annoyed with himself for becoming aroused by the one person in the universe he knew would use it against him, he snapped. “What?”
Hurt darkened her eyes but was gone so fast he’d have missed it if he blinked. “Nothing. Get off me.” She shoved at him, this time in earnest, but he didn’t budge.
He made an effort to soften his tone this time. “Tell me what you wanted.”
“Fuck off.”
He looked down, trying to get a read on her, but he kept getting derailed by the dark circles under her eyes. She was healing from her torture experience, but far too slowly, and they might still have a long way to go.
“Tell me, Harvester, how did you perform Heavenly good deeds for five thousand years and not get caught?”
She laughed, but he failed to see what was so funny. “Easy. I didn’t perform any good deeds. I fell from Heaven in order to gain a position as the Horsemen’s Watcher and derail the Daemonica’s Apocalypse if and when the time came.” She dug her nails into his chest, and he swore she purred when he felt a twinge of pain. “If something wasn’t related in some way to the Apocalypse, I ignored it. It would look pretty suspicious if I ran around rescuing kittens and defending humans from demons now, wouldn’t it?” She writhed, struggling to escape his hold. “Release me.”
“I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what you want.”
“I don’t want your help.”
So damned stubborn. “You might not want my help, but you need it.” He shifted his weight and eased to the side, giving her some room so she wouldn’t feel trapped. “We need to work together to get out of here alive. You know that, right?”
She sprang away from him like a frightened rabbit and settled on her haunches a few feet away. “Of course I know that.” He thought her face was a shade paler than it had been a moment ago. “I just don’t like it. And I don’t trust you. I don’t understand why you would risk so much to rescue someone you hate.”
Because you watched over my children. Remembering why he was here erased all his animosity. She was difficult, volatile, and infuriating as hell, but he owed her a million times over, and so did every human and angel in existence. But could he risk telling her the truth? If what Raphael said about her hating Yenrieth was true, she’d blow a gasket if she found out Reaver was the very angel she detested.
Maybe he should test the waters a little.
“Wouldn’t you rescue someone you hated if they saved all mankind and prevented an apocalypse that would have killed countless angels?” he asked.
“No.”
“Not even if that someone was Yenrieth?”
She hissed, baring her fangs, and he knew Raphael hadn’t jacked him around on how she felt about Yenrieth.
“Especially not him.” Her hands clenched into white-knuckled fists. “Why would you even bring him up to me?”
“You gave up your wings to take care of his kids. He must have meant something to you, even if you hate him now.”
“He did mean something to me, but that was in the past. Now I would rather see him rot for all eternity than save his miserable soul,” she growled, and he wondered what he’d done to her to make her hate him that much. “So shut up about him and tell me why you did this. You’re not an angel of justice. You’re a battle angel.”
“So I can’t want to make sure someone who does a great service is rewarded for their actions?”
“Oh, I think you absolutely want that,” she said. “But it’s not your priority. You were bred for war, so it’s in your nature to write off people as collateral damage if their lives are sacrificed for the greater good. If the archangels didn’t want you to come, then they’re well aware that the greater good will be served by my being tortured for all eternity.” She stood in a fluid, lithe movement that drew his appreciative gaze. “So why would you, a battle angel who should consider me a casualty of war and an acceptable loss, risk starting a war to save someone you hate?”
“You aren’t an acceptable loss, and I don’t hate you,” he said, surprising even himself with his honesty. But that didn’t mean he liked her. His feelings for her were as complicated as the history between Heaven and hell.
Her snort of derision set his teeth on edge. “Even if you loved me, I wouldn’t understand why you saved me.”
“Have you ever loved someone?” he blurted out, and whoa, that came out of left field.
But suddenly, he wanted to know the answer. He couldn’t imagine her in a relationship, and he was beginning to wonder how prickly she’d been even as an angel. Who in their right mind would put up with her?
As Yenrieth, I must have.
The thought sucked the air right out of his lungs. It had popped into his head as easily and inexplicably as his question to her about loving someone. Being in Sheoul must be getting to him.
“Irrelevant,” she said. “You don’t love me, so that’s not why you did this.”
“It’s a simple question.”
“And I have a simple answer. Fuck off.” Harvester even offered him a helpful visual aid in the form of a hand gesture.
He flopped onto his back and stared up at the craggy ceiling. “If you keep saying that, you’ll forget how to talk like a polite person.” Something whacked him in the head. “Ow.” He sat up and glared at the stone wobbling next to him. “What was that for?”
“For fun.” She scooped up his backpack. “Are we leaving or what? I’m tired of waiting for Calder.”
Despite his curiosity, he welcomed the change of subject from past loves, because he definitely didn’t want to get into why he’d rescued her again. He wanted to tell her that he was the angel Yenrieth, to explain that the Horsemen were his children and he was grateful for what she’d done, but now wasn’t the time. He had a lot of questions about his past and who he’d been as Yenrieth, and until he broke down the massive wall around her, he couldn’t expect any real answers. If anything, giving her important information like that would hand her a huge advantage over him, and that was something he couldn’t risk. She was far too unpredictible and, likely, unstable after months in Satan’s dungeon.
Of course, Reaver thought she’d been unstable before her own father imprisoned her.
“We don’t know where Calder went.” He gestured to the far side of the cavern, where two different tunnels meant two different possibilities. “We could guess, but if we choose wrong, we’ll lose him.”
They couldn’t afford another loss. Reaver hadn’t known Matt well, but he hoped the guy was okay. Tavin, though… Reaver was going to steep in guilt until he got confirmation that the Sem had made it to Underworld General.
Harvester hadn’t moved.
“Harvester?”
She still didn’t move. In fact, he thought she might be shaking.
“Harvester,” he prompted, more urgently this time.
Her gaze flipped up to his. “We have to find him, Reaver.”
She licked her lips, and he caught a glimpse of her fangs, longer than usual, and he felt like a dolt. She needed to feed, and they were out of time.
He shot for a tone that wasn’t dripping with sympathy—she’d hate that—or that wasn’t overflowing with impatience. “You can feed from me.”
“No.” She backed up, crying out when she bumped her wing anchors into a stalactite that hung so low it nearly touched the ground. When she spoke again, her voice was laced with pain. “I might lose control. And it’s against Heavenly law for you to willingly give your blood for food.”
The control thing was an issue for sure, but since when did she care about Heavenly law? “As you’ve pointed out before, I tend to bend rules.”
“Bend? You wouldn’t be bending a rule. You’d be breaking it over the ass of an archangel.”
The visual almost made him laugh. “Don’t worry about that.” After what he’d done, what was one more broken law?
“I’m trying,” she said tightly, “to not make things worse for you with the archangels.”
He actually did laugh at that, even as he appreciated her concern. “I hit the height of worst when I rescued you.”
Her chin came up, and he braced himself for a mulish conversation. “I’m not feeding from you.”
He wasn’t worried about a broken rule that no one would find out about anyway. His concern was that drinking his blood could, potentially, drain his powers as it replenished hers. He could scarcely afford to lose any strength, and he wasn’t sure how much he could trust Harvester if she was significantly stronger than he was.
“Why are you being so obstinate? A year ago, you’d have jumped at the chance to suck me dry.”
“A year ago, I was pretending to be an evil bitch.”
“And now?”
“Now I don’t know what I am!” she shouted. “I used to know, and now I don’t, and it’s all your fault.”
Ah, damn. For so long after he’d lost his memory, he’d wandered aimlessly, not knowing who he’d been and unclear on who he was, other than an angel who had been given the boot from Heaven for saving the life of a human child who had been fated to die.
