I shook my head. “Police are in on it, and what the hell is a body guard going to do against them?”
“Protect you.”
My jaw twitched. “How the hell will one guy, or even five guys, be able to protect us round the clock for the rest of our lives?”
Anger built up, and the urge to punch something skyrocketed, but there was nothing to hit. I exploded, yelling out and up to the heavens.
“There has to be something.”
I was breathing hard, tears filling my eyes. “There’s only one thing. I’m dead, but I can still protect Lila.”
Devastation.
The email said it all—bang! You’re dead.
I couldn’t stop staring at the screen, at the photos of Lila and me coming and going from the condo I was sitting in.
When did I become so lax? I didn’t even notice it happened, so blissed out with Lila the threat that hung over me wasn’t even a blip on my radar.
I’d tried to live a life, be happy, start over with the woman I loved.
“Nate, you there?” Tom’s voice rang out through the receiver.
“Y-yeah, I’m here.”
“We’ve gotten three of his men arrested and are close to getting him. The files have been instrumental to that. Not much longer.”
My hand rubbed over my face. “I don’t know if it’ll be soon enough.”
“Why? What’s going on?”
I swallowed hard. “They know I’m helping you.”
“How?”
“They know.”
I hung up the phone and clenched my shaking hand into a fist. My eyes scrunched closed, and I tried to hold it in, but that was impossible. I swung out, hitting the lamp on my desk and sending it smashing into the wall.
I yelled, hard and harsh, the sound bouncing around. Anger coursed through me. I stood up and tossed my chair across the room. Every muscle was tight as I searched for more to destroy, to quell the overwhelming pain consuming me.
I wanted Lila to be mine in every way, and she was going to pay the price for my selfishness with her life.
Should we stay, or should we run? They’d still find us, so we’d only be delaying the inevitable, but there was always the small chance they wouldn’t. There was also the fact that my family would be put in danger.
It was the end of days.
I picked up something from my desk and hurled it, indifferent to what it was, then found another object. I was lost in a sea of destruction, searching for the way, pushing past it all. A chair leg in my hand crunched as it slammed into the monitor, cracking through the photos and turning it black.
I then took it to the walls, beating them in as I begged a higher power to take it all away.
“Nate?” Lila stood in the doorway, staring at me.
I stopped, my breath coming out in heavy pants, and looked around. Papers, glass, and wood splinters were spread out all around me.
I said I would protect her with my life, and the fates were going to take me up on my offer.
The light faded, sun setting off in the distance.
Lila and I were sitting on the balcony, only it wasn’t the balcony on our condo. It was the deck in my backyard in Carmel—which was odd, because I’d never taken Lila there. I didn’t even own the house anymore—it sold two years ago.
I hadn’t even lived in it since before the accident. I couldn’t after Grace died.
Two stories, nearly four thousand square feet, over a half acre lot—suburbia.
Lila smiled at me, her hand running over her baby bump. She sipped her lemonade and stared out at the sunset. I reached out and ran my fingers down her arm.
A shiver ran through me as her image flickered, changing. Blue eyes turned to me—Grace.
“Do you really think it will be any different this time?”
“What?”
“Miscarriage after miscarriage—do you really think that will change with Lila?”
The scenery shifted, the sky darkened, and I was in my condo. Moonlight filtered in, exposing the starkness that was life before Lila.
There was no furniture in the living room, only a box—the box.
My chest tightened as I stared at it. Why was it there?
“Will you make another box of secrets? Another place to hide the evidence of your past?” Grace walked over and kneeled in front of it. Her fingers ran around the edges and then she flipped the clasp.
My hand shot out. “Wait!”
She turned to me. “Wait for what? Don’t you want to see what’s in here?”
No. I was certain I didn’t want that.
She raised the lid and set it back.
“Wow.” Grace went silent as she looked at whatever was on top. She turned to me and held up a photo of my wedding with Lila. “You really were meant for each other.”
I began to shake, the tightness around my chest squeezed. “W-why is that in there?”
Grace blinked at me. “Why wouldn’t it be? She’s dead, just like me.”
I shook my head. “No. No, she’s not.”
Grace stood and walked forward, another photo in her hand. My eyes widened, tears filling them as she held up a photo of Lila staring blankly at me, blood everywhere.
“Of course she is. She’s married to you. Don’t tell me you really think you can keep her safe.” Her hand caressed my cheek, her eyes sad. “Nate, she was dead the moment you met her.”
My eyes squeezed tight, and I shook my head. “No! I can keep her safe.”
She stroked through my hair. “Really? I thought you weren’t going to be naïve any longer.”
My eyes snapped open, and I stared at the pain in hers. She leaned forward and kissed me. When she pulled back, it wasn’t Grace, but Lila who stared back at me.
“Do you really think you can keep me alive? Keep us alive?” She looked down, her hand running soothing circles on her round stomach.
It felt like there was a vice locked down around me. “I will do anything to keep you safe.”
She stepped back, pain filling her face. “Why aren’t you seeing it? Why are you blind?”
My brow scrunched. “I don’t understand.”
The air swirled around, lightning cracking. She closed the distance between us in the skittering blink of an eye, her face inches from mine.
“Lila will still be dead.”
I sat up. Confusion filled me, and it took me a moment to realize I was in our bedroom. My breath was coming out in hard, harsh pants as I took in the darkness.
“Protect you.”
My jaw twitched. “How the hell will one guy, or even five guys, be able to protect us round the clock for the rest of our lives?”
Anger built up, and the urge to punch something skyrocketed, but there was nothing to hit. I exploded, yelling out and up to the heavens.
“There has to be something.”
I was breathing hard, tears filling my eyes. “There’s only one thing. I’m dead, but I can still protect Lila.”
Devastation.
The email said it all—bang! You’re dead.
I couldn’t stop staring at the screen, at the photos of Lila and me coming and going from the condo I was sitting in.
When did I become so lax? I didn’t even notice it happened, so blissed out with Lila the threat that hung over me wasn’t even a blip on my radar.
I’d tried to live a life, be happy, start over with the woman I loved.
“Nate, you there?” Tom’s voice rang out through the receiver.
“Y-yeah, I’m here.”
“We’ve gotten three of his men arrested and are close to getting him. The files have been instrumental to that. Not much longer.”
My hand rubbed over my face. “I don’t know if it’ll be soon enough.”
“Why? What’s going on?”
I swallowed hard. “They know I’m helping you.”
“How?”
“They know.”
I hung up the phone and clenched my shaking hand into a fist. My eyes scrunched closed, and I tried to hold it in, but that was impossible. I swung out, hitting the lamp on my desk and sending it smashing into the wall.
I yelled, hard and harsh, the sound bouncing around. Anger coursed through me. I stood up and tossed my chair across the room. Every muscle was tight as I searched for more to destroy, to quell the overwhelming pain consuming me.
I wanted Lila to be mine in every way, and she was going to pay the price for my selfishness with her life.
Should we stay, or should we run? They’d still find us, so we’d only be delaying the inevitable, but there was always the small chance they wouldn’t. There was also the fact that my family would be put in danger.
It was the end of days.
I picked up something from my desk and hurled it, indifferent to what it was, then found another object. I was lost in a sea of destruction, searching for the way, pushing past it all. A chair leg in my hand crunched as it slammed into the monitor, cracking through the photos and turning it black.
I then took it to the walls, beating them in as I begged a higher power to take it all away.
“Nate?” Lila stood in the doorway, staring at me.
I stopped, my breath coming out in heavy pants, and looked around. Papers, glass, and wood splinters were spread out all around me.
I said I would protect her with my life, and the fates were going to take me up on my offer.
The light faded, sun setting off in the distance.
Lila and I were sitting on the balcony, only it wasn’t the balcony on our condo. It was the deck in my backyard in Carmel—which was odd, because I’d never taken Lila there. I didn’t even own the house anymore—it sold two years ago.
I hadn’t even lived in it since before the accident. I couldn’t after Grace died.
Two stories, nearly four thousand square feet, over a half acre lot—suburbia.
Lila smiled at me, her hand running over her baby bump. She sipped her lemonade and stared out at the sunset. I reached out and ran my fingers down her arm.
A shiver ran through me as her image flickered, changing. Blue eyes turned to me—Grace.
“Do you really think it will be any different this time?”
“What?”
“Miscarriage after miscarriage—do you really think that will change with Lila?”
The scenery shifted, the sky darkened, and I was in my condo. Moonlight filtered in, exposing the starkness that was life before Lila.
There was no furniture in the living room, only a box—the box.
My chest tightened as I stared at it. Why was it there?
“Will you make another box of secrets? Another place to hide the evidence of your past?” Grace walked over and kneeled in front of it. Her fingers ran around the edges and then she flipped the clasp.
My hand shot out. “Wait!”
She turned to me. “Wait for what? Don’t you want to see what’s in here?”
No. I was certain I didn’t want that.
She raised the lid and set it back.
“Wow.” Grace went silent as she looked at whatever was on top. She turned to me and held up a photo of my wedding with Lila. “You really were meant for each other.”
I began to shake, the tightness around my chest squeezed. “W-why is that in there?”
Grace blinked at me. “Why wouldn’t it be? She’s dead, just like me.”
I shook my head. “No. No, she’s not.”
Grace stood and walked forward, another photo in her hand. My eyes widened, tears filling them as she held up a photo of Lila staring blankly at me, blood everywhere.
“Of course she is. She’s married to you. Don’t tell me you really think you can keep her safe.” Her hand caressed my cheek, her eyes sad. “Nate, she was dead the moment you met her.”
My eyes squeezed tight, and I shook my head. “No! I can keep her safe.”
She stroked through my hair. “Really? I thought you weren’t going to be naïve any longer.”
My eyes snapped open, and I stared at the pain in hers. She leaned forward and kissed me. When she pulled back, it wasn’t Grace, but Lila who stared back at me.
“Do you really think you can keep me alive? Keep us alive?” She looked down, her hand running soothing circles on her round stomach.
It felt like there was a vice locked down around me. “I will do anything to keep you safe.”
She stepped back, pain filling her face. “Why aren’t you seeing it? Why are you blind?”
My brow scrunched. “I don’t understand.”
The air swirled around, lightning cracking. She closed the distance between us in the skittering blink of an eye, her face inches from mine.
“Lila will still be dead.”
I sat up. Confusion filled me, and it took me a moment to realize I was in our bedroom. My breath was coming out in hard, harsh pants as I took in the darkness.
