Reckless Love
Page 44
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I’d been worried Chris would take my new affection and try to push our relationship to the next level. Thankfully, he had too much to do. If he wasn’t coaching Ian, he was on the phone with sponsors or the fight organization, working on all the last-minute details. I made sure to constantly point out how much stronger Ian had gotten, and that he was more than ready to win.
Still there was one part of fight preparation that worried the crap out of me—cutting weight. Before the fight, Ian had to reduce his weight by twenty pounds, which was something all the fighters did. But they did it in such a short amount of time that it made the nurse in me cringe, and the part of me that cared for Ian want to cry.
I had to sit back and watch as he sweated and dehydrated himself the last few days leading up to the fight so that he would be able to hit the correct weight for his fighting class at weigh-in.
By the time we boarded the plane, he was so shaky that Jonah had to help him put his luggage in the overhead bin. My eyes fixed on Ian as he grabbed the back of the seat in front of him and slowly lowered himself into the aisle seat.
“He’ll be fine, sweetie,” Chris said, pulling my attention away. “He’s been through this before.” He chuckled as if it was no big deal, but I had a bitter taste in my mouth and my stomach was all cramped up. “You don’t mind if I take the window seat, do you?” he asked. “It’s easier for me to sleep on that side, and I want to try to get a nap in on the flight.” He slid in, taking the seat without waiting for me to respond.
I sighed and shook my head. It was my first time on a plane, and I would have liked to see what it was like taking off, but I didn’t feel like arguing. Besides, Chris was paying for the trip. I had set aside a few hundred dollars for spending cash, but wouldn’t be here if he hadn’t paid for my airfare and hotel.
I took the aisle seat next to Chris, and he lifted up the armrest between us. Putting his arm around me, he pulled me close. “Sorry I haven’t been able to spend more time with you, Kenzie.” He kissed me. “I promise we’ll be able to spend more time together once we get Ian all set up for the fight.”
He folded me into his arms, forcing my head into his shoulder, which was drenched in cologne. My almost constant stress headache worsened and my stomach, which had been acting up for the past several weeks, gurgled. It would be a long flight.
It wasn’t until the plane had taken off, and Chris pulled the window shade to get some sleep, that I was finally able to free myself from his grasp. When the seatbelt sign pinged off, I got up and headed for the bathroom. Not just to get away from Chris, but because my stomach issues were threatening to turn the corner after the roller coaster of emotion combined with the motion of the plane at takeoff.
I made it to the bathroom just in time. Latching the door, I flipped the seat up on the toilet, pulled my hair back, and let my lunch back out the same way it had come in.
Afterward, I washed my face in the small sink and looked at myself in the mirror. I was a mess. My face was pale and my hair was a gnarl-fest. I ran my fingers through my hair and consoled myself. At least now I wouldn’t be lying to Chris when I told him I was too sick to go out tonight.
I frowned. The fight was the day after tomorrow. I just needed to make it through two more days, then I could be done with this whole mess. I could break up with Chris, find a new job, and forget about the man who’d stolen my heart.
Love was too dangerous a game. I’d known that my entire life, but somehow these last few months, I’d forgotten it. I needed to be strong.
I pulled the latch on the door and slid it open, and was shocked to find Ian standing just outside.
“I saw you rush back here. Are you okay?”
Fully aware that I’d just thrown up and had no access to a toothbrush, I covered my mouth. “I’m fine,” I said through my fingers.
“You don’t look fine,” he said, pulling my hand away from my face so that he could see. “You’re pale.” His gaze darted down the aisle to our seats, then he put his hand on my shoulder. “Just sit down for a minute.” He guided me to an open seat a few rows down, and squatted next to me.
I hadn’t felt dizzy, but sitting down felt really good just then. I might have been a little woozy. “I’m fine,” I protested. Because even if I wasn’t, Ian didn’t need to know. We’d been doing a good job of staying apart so far. No need to ruin that now. I was so close to the finish line.
He brushed my hair back behind my ear, making a shiver rush down my face and neck. But then the plane hit a bit of turbulence, and he stumbled and grabbed the seat’s back for support. His arm shook, reminding me of the frail state he was in.
“Don’t worry about me,” I said. “You should be resting. You’re the one who’s all dehydrated.” I stood up and tried to make him take the same seat I’d just vacated.
“Nonsense,” he said.
“Look at you, you’re shaking. I…” My voice wavered. “You need water.”
“Kenzie.” His voice was calm and soothing, and he once again put a hand on my shoulder. “If I don’t make the correct weight, I can’t fight. You know that. Besides, I do this before all the fights. I’ll be fine.”
I looked at him again. He was still the same tall, strong Ian I’d always known. Despite that, something about his posture made me wanted to take him in my arms and hold him. I wanted to care for him while he went through this insane bit of self-torture, but I couldn’t. I needed to be strong, so I balled up my fists.
Still there was one part of fight preparation that worried the crap out of me—cutting weight. Before the fight, Ian had to reduce his weight by twenty pounds, which was something all the fighters did. But they did it in such a short amount of time that it made the nurse in me cringe, and the part of me that cared for Ian want to cry.
I had to sit back and watch as he sweated and dehydrated himself the last few days leading up to the fight so that he would be able to hit the correct weight for his fighting class at weigh-in.
By the time we boarded the plane, he was so shaky that Jonah had to help him put his luggage in the overhead bin. My eyes fixed on Ian as he grabbed the back of the seat in front of him and slowly lowered himself into the aisle seat.
“He’ll be fine, sweetie,” Chris said, pulling my attention away. “He’s been through this before.” He chuckled as if it was no big deal, but I had a bitter taste in my mouth and my stomach was all cramped up. “You don’t mind if I take the window seat, do you?” he asked. “It’s easier for me to sleep on that side, and I want to try to get a nap in on the flight.” He slid in, taking the seat without waiting for me to respond.
I sighed and shook my head. It was my first time on a plane, and I would have liked to see what it was like taking off, but I didn’t feel like arguing. Besides, Chris was paying for the trip. I had set aside a few hundred dollars for spending cash, but wouldn’t be here if he hadn’t paid for my airfare and hotel.
I took the aisle seat next to Chris, and he lifted up the armrest between us. Putting his arm around me, he pulled me close. “Sorry I haven’t been able to spend more time with you, Kenzie.” He kissed me. “I promise we’ll be able to spend more time together once we get Ian all set up for the fight.”
He folded me into his arms, forcing my head into his shoulder, which was drenched in cologne. My almost constant stress headache worsened and my stomach, which had been acting up for the past several weeks, gurgled. It would be a long flight.
It wasn’t until the plane had taken off, and Chris pulled the window shade to get some sleep, that I was finally able to free myself from his grasp. When the seatbelt sign pinged off, I got up and headed for the bathroom. Not just to get away from Chris, but because my stomach issues were threatening to turn the corner after the roller coaster of emotion combined with the motion of the plane at takeoff.
I made it to the bathroom just in time. Latching the door, I flipped the seat up on the toilet, pulled my hair back, and let my lunch back out the same way it had come in.
Afterward, I washed my face in the small sink and looked at myself in the mirror. I was a mess. My face was pale and my hair was a gnarl-fest. I ran my fingers through my hair and consoled myself. At least now I wouldn’t be lying to Chris when I told him I was too sick to go out tonight.
I frowned. The fight was the day after tomorrow. I just needed to make it through two more days, then I could be done with this whole mess. I could break up with Chris, find a new job, and forget about the man who’d stolen my heart.
Love was too dangerous a game. I’d known that my entire life, but somehow these last few months, I’d forgotten it. I needed to be strong.
I pulled the latch on the door and slid it open, and was shocked to find Ian standing just outside.
“I saw you rush back here. Are you okay?”
Fully aware that I’d just thrown up and had no access to a toothbrush, I covered my mouth. “I’m fine,” I said through my fingers.
“You don’t look fine,” he said, pulling my hand away from my face so that he could see. “You’re pale.” His gaze darted down the aisle to our seats, then he put his hand on my shoulder. “Just sit down for a minute.” He guided me to an open seat a few rows down, and squatted next to me.
I hadn’t felt dizzy, but sitting down felt really good just then. I might have been a little woozy. “I’m fine,” I protested. Because even if I wasn’t, Ian didn’t need to know. We’d been doing a good job of staying apart so far. No need to ruin that now. I was so close to the finish line.
He brushed my hair back behind my ear, making a shiver rush down my face and neck. But then the plane hit a bit of turbulence, and he stumbled and grabbed the seat’s back for support. His arm shook, reminding me of the frail state he was in.
“Don’t worry about me,” I said. “You should be resting. You’re the one who’s all dehydrated.” I stood up and tried to make him take the same seat I’d just vacated.
“Nonsense,” he said.
“Look at you, you’re shaking. I…” My voice wavered. “You need water.”
“Kenzie.” His voice was calm and soothing, and he once again put a hand on my shoulder. “If I don’t make the correct weight, I can’t fight. You know that. Besides, I do this before all the fights. I’ll be fine.”
I looked at him again. He was still the same tall, strong Ian I’d always known. Despite that, something about his posture made me wanted to take him in my arms and hold him. I wanted to care for him while he went through this insane bit of self-torture, but I couldn’t. I needed to be strong, so I balled up my fists.
