“Were you going to tell me?” he asked, and his voice sounded very hoarse.
“Absolutely, but when I was ready and not because I need anything from you. You’ve been very clear how you feel about this sort of thing, like you don’t realize I’ll have some DNA in this child, as well… And mine is excellent, by the way. So once I realized what had happened, I decided I could handle this just fine. But I’m an honest person and you deserve to know. How you respond is up to you.”
He looked out at the ocean. He circled his raised knees with his arms and put his forehead down on his knees. He groaned. He took a moment, then he straightened, looked at her and said, “And how are you going to respond?” he asked.
She actually laughed. “Well, funny you should ask. I’m going to be a little nauseated in the mornings, be very tired in the afternoons and early evenings, grow enormous and then deliver. Then I am rather committed full-time for about twenty years.”
“Do I have this right—you told your brother already, but not me?” he asked.
She took a breath. “First of all, you weren’t here and he was. I had a phone number but this wasn’t the kind of thing I wanted to tell you on the phone, at least until I was sure that was the only option. I would’ve gotten in touch eventually, you can be sure of that. But for the time being all I was sure of was that you were partying in Hollywood, kissing blond necks and stuff.”
“I told you,” he said. “A good friend, a hug. That was not a real kiss.”
“So, I had to ask for my brother’s emotional support. I’ll get a job, pay my own freight, take care of my children and—”
“Is there any discussion about whether—?”
Her expression became fierce as she stopped him by holding up a hand. “Don’t even go there. You don’t have to like it, but it is what it is.”
“Go where?” he asked, confused.
“I’m having my baby, no matter what you want.”
“I wasn’t going to ask that! I was going to ask if there was any chance we could do it together.”
“Not likely, if I’m here and you’re in Hollywood,” she said.
He ran a hand over his head. “I figured as much.”
And like a mental collage, little snapshots of his childhood came to mind—his dad leaving when he was about five. A new man with a couple of weekend sons, older than Dylan, moving in. A new baby sister, another man leaving—but at least he took the weekend sons who had never missed an opportunity to pick on Dylan. He had weekend visits with his own dad but more often with his grandmother. His mother going away to make a movie, coming home six months later with a different man, this time with a stepdaughter older than Dylan and a new baby brother for his mother. That gave him five half sibs and just as many steps.
Katie lay down on her back again, her fingers laced over her abdomen. He looked down at that sweet face and knew it wouldn’t be that way with her. It still scared him to death, but he wasn’t afraid of her. But she had his baby in her and it was the idea that a single mother was better for that baby than an unhappy family life that scared him. He could not let his child have the kind of childhood he had. He just wasn’t entirely sure how to guarantee that.
He leaned over her and put a small kiss on her lips and she opened her eyes. “You don’t need a job, Katie. Your job is being a mother and you’re an excellent one. I’ll take care of the other details.”
She almost smiled but not quite. “Does this mean you’re actually happy?”
“Are you, Katie? Happy about it?”
“When I had time to think about it, yes. It’s inconvenient and I still have to deal with some of those early pregnancy issues, but if I had a choice, I wouldn’t change it. And I realize I do have a choice.”
“And how long have you had to think about it? How long have you known?”
“Maybe a week. Maybe a little less.”
“I have a favor to ask,” he said. “Let me have that much time to get to happy. I’m a little shocked. And a lot uncomfortable. But I’m not an idiot—no one takes care of you but me.”
She just looked at him for a long, meaningful moment and he knew there was so much missing from this situation. This must be so far from ideal in her eyes—he should mention marriage and love. There was a part of him that wanted to, even if he wasn’t completely sure yet.
“I guess that’s not too much to ask,” she finally said.
Good thing Katie wasn’t expecting an instant transformation from Dylan because she certainly didn’t get one. He appeared to be in the same place. The idea of fathering a child must be terrifying to him.
She remembered Charlie. Not long after their honeymoon, he had a field training mission with the army. They’d been married a whole month when he left for two weeks. When he returned he walked into their small apartment, dropped his duffel and yelled for her. Bellowed for her, which was what he typically did. Katie, baby, come get all over your man! He could be such a caveman. There was a part of her that craved that kind of attention, a part of her that wished he could be a little more civilized. She was so in love she ran to him. He smelled to high heaven, of stale perspiration, mud, two weeks in the field, God knew what all.
She flung herself into his arms, then flung herself out of his arms and ran for the bathroom where she proceeded to hover over the commode, really on the verge.
“I know I smell bad, but that’s a little melodramatic, don’t you think,” he said, standing in the bathroom doorway, unlacing his boots and stripping off his BDU. “Take it easy, I’ll get right in the shower.”
He was down to his fatigue pants, stinky bare feet and broad, delicious, tattooed chest, when she turned watering eyes up to him. “Charlie, I’m pregnant.”
“Oh, baby!” he said, falling to his knees to take her into his arms. “Baby…”
“Charlie!” she yelled. “Shower, for God’s sake! Please!”
“Yeah,” he said, rising and getting rid of what remained of his clothes. “You bet, baby. Then we’ll celebrate! Do pregnant women have sex?” he wanted to know as he turned on the shower.
He was one of a kind, that was for sure. It took a special woman to be married to Charlie Malone and his lifestyle. And it was going to take a lot of patience to make peace with Dylan Childress and draw him safely into her heart. She wondered if she had the time or the faith.
With her eyes closed, she thought about the differences between Charlie and Dylan…and their similarities. Both shockingly handsome, smart and confident men, at first glance you’d think they were alike. Beyond those obvious similarities they were opposites. Charlie was bold while Dylan was more reserved. Charlie grabbed what he wanted without the slightest hesitation while there were lots of emotional connections that still terrified Dylan. Charlie had waited a long time to really fall in love but once he recognized it, he was all in. Dylan had too many childhood ghosts to make that leap of faith.
Both men were phenomenal lovers; she could never have resisted either one of them.
She must have nodded off in the warm, beach sunshine because she felt Dylan curve around her. He was lying on his side, his arm casually crossing over her waist. His breath was warm on her ear and inhaled her scent, exhaling slowly. He nuzzled her softly. “Don’t fall asleep, honey,” he said. “We have to watch the time. The boys…”
She smiled and snuggled a little closer. He remembered they had to pick up the twins. And stop by her brother’s house.
Yes, it was going to take a special kind of patience to let him know he’d be safe with her. And she would require a special kind of courage to take a chance on him. Green Berets were a piece of cake compared to movie stars.
Dylan sensed a sort of peacefulness about Katie as they left the beach and drove back to Virgin River. Or maybe it was just that she wasn’t as uptight about this peacemaking confrontation with Conner as he was. He remained quiet while Katie talked about Dylan’s mysterious special pizza for dinner, about how to make peace with her bear, about how the sound of the waves had been so relaxing she’d fallen asleep, but then she was so sleepy these days she could fall asleep standing up.
“I know I’m not very talkative right now, Katie, but it’s not you,” he said.
“I don’t care, Dylan, because my mind is made up about how I’m moving forward. I’m sure when you work out a few things in your head, you’ll talk a little more.”
He turned toward her. “Exactly,” he said.
When they pulled up to the little prefab schoolhouse, the boys were busy on the play set that Dylan had helped to erect. “Katie, when we get to Conner’s house, can you get the boys occupied with something so I can talk to your brother without the boys around?”
“If you promise you’re not using that as an excuse to get into a fistfight…”
“Look at my eye. You think I want to sacrifice the other one? I just want to talk to him, but if he gets angry the boys shouldn’t be there. If you want to, I can take you and the guys home and come back by myself for this talk.”
“No—I’ll find them something on TV they can watch. But behave!”
He didn’t reply to that but he didn’t feel that he was the loose cannon—behaving was his sole intention. And he knew the road to hell was paved with good intentions.
He and Katie got to Conner and Leslie’s house before they were home from work. “The door will be unlocked,” she said. “I’ll take the kids in and get them settled in front of the TV with a snack. Conner has a few of their favorite movies and games here. Would you like something to drink?”
“How would he feel about me having a beer from his refrigerator?”
She flashed him a teasing smile, lifting her brow. “Need a little calming courage?”
“Baby, after what I learned about an hour ago, I should probably have a six-pack. I’ll wait on the front porch.”
He leaned against the porch rail and waited. This must be what it felt like to be a teenage boy who was meeting a girl’s father when he’d gotten her in trouble, except it was probably the rare father who launched an attack. Even with all the siblings Dylan had, he’d never been close enough to one to feel that kind of protectiveness. In fact, he felt more protective toward Katie after knowing her for half a summer than he ever had toward one of his own family members. He wondered if that little bun in the oven was making the difference.
She finally brought him a beer. “Sure you don’t want to come inside?”
“Nope,” he said. He walked down the porch steps.
“Where are you going?”
He turned to look at her. “I’m not doing this in front of you, Katie. I mean, you might see us, but I’m not having this conversation for your entertainment.”
“Trust me, I don’t feel real entertained.”
“If I’m away from the house, you won’t be tempted to put in your two cents’ worth.”
“Well, jeez, you’re a little bossy there, aren’t you?”
“Making us a very well-matched set, when you think about it,” he said, and he walked back to the street where her SUV was parked. He leaned against it. It was his own damn fault he had this mess to clean up and he was going to figure it out before it got any worse. When he thought about what Lang would do it didn’t really help his situation much. Lang wouldn’t hesitate to try to convince his woman to marry him, provided the woman had been Sue Ann.
Finally the yellow SUV that Leslie drove pulled up to the house and into the drive, all the way forward to the carport. Right behind her was Conner in his great big truck and Dylan thought, I should’ve rented a bigger truck. Conner got out of the truck and briefly glared at Dylan, and Dylan had to look at the ground in front of his crossed legs to keep from laughing. Conner had white tape across his rather swollen, purple nose.
“Absolutely, but when I was ready and not because I need anything from you. You’ve been very clear how you feel about this sort of thing, like you don’t realize I’ll have some DNA in this child, as well… And mine is excellent, by the way. So once I realized what had happened, I decided I could handle this just fine. But I’m an honest person and you deserve to know. How you respond is up to you.”
He looked out at the ocean. He circled his raised knees with his arms and put his forehead down on his knees. He groaned. He took a moment, then he straightened, looked at her and said, “And how are you going to respond?” he asked.
She actually laughed. “Well, funny you should ask. I’m going to be a little nauseated in the mornings, be very tired in the afternoons and early evenings, grow enormous and then deliver. Then I am rather committed full-time for about twenty years.”
“Do I have this right—you told your brother already, but not me?” he asked.
She took a breath. “First of all, you weren’t here and he was. I had a phone number but this wasn’t the kind of thing I wanted to tell you on the phone, at least until I was sure that was the only option. I would’ve gotten in touch eventually, you can be sure of that. But for the time being all I was sure of was that you were partying in Hollywood, kissing blond necks and stuff.”
“I told you,” he said. “A good friend, a hug. That was not a real kiss.”
“So, I had to ask for my brother’s emotional support. I’ll get a job, pay my own freight, take care of my children and—”
“Is there any discussion about whether—?”
Her expression became fierce as she stopped him by holding up a hand. “Don’t even go there. You don’t have to like it, but it is what it is.”
“Go where?” he asked, confused.
“I’m having my baby, no matter what you want.”
“I wasn’t going to ask that! I was going to ask if there was any chance we could do it together.”
“Not likely, if I’m here and you’re in Hollywood,” she said.
He ran a hand over his head. “I figured as much.”
And like a mental collage, little snapshots of his childhood came to mind—his dad leaving when he was about five. A new man with a couple of weekend sons, older than Dylan, moving in. A new baby sister, another man leaving—but at least he took the weekend sons who had never missed an opportunity to pick on Dylan. He had weekend visits with his own dad but more often with his grandmother. His mother going away to make a movie, coming home six months later with a different man, this time with a stepdaughter older than Dylan and a new baby brother for his mother. That gave him five half sibs and just as many steps.
Katie lay down on her back again, her fingers laced over her abdomen. He looked down at that sweet face and knew it wouldn’t be that way with her. It still scared him to death, but he wasn’t afraid of her. But she had his baby in her and it was the idea that a single mother was better for that baby than an unhappy family life that scared him. He could not let his child have the kind of childhood he had. He just wasn’t entirely sure how to guarantee that.
He leaned over her and put a small kiss on her lips and she opened her eyes. “You don’t need a job, Katie. Your job is being a mother and you’re an excellent one. I’ll take care of the other details.”
She almost smiled but not quite. “Does this mean you’re actually happy?”
“Are you, Katie? Happy about it?”
“When I had time to think about it, yes. It’s inconvenient and I still have to deal with some of those early pregnancy issues, but if I had a choice, I wouldn’t change it. And I realize I do have a choice.”
“And how long have you had to think about it? How long have you known?”
“Maybe a week. Maybe a little less.”
“I have a favor to ask,” he said. “Let me have that much time to get to happy. I’m a little shocked. And a lot uncomfortable. But I’m not an idiot—no one takes care of you but me.”
She just looked at him for a long, meaningful moment and he knew there was so much missing from this situation. This must be so far from ideal in her eyes—he should mention marriage and love. There was a part of him that wanted to, even if he wasn’t completely sure yet.
“I guess that’s not too much to ask,” she finally said.
Good thing Katie wasn’t expecting an instant transformation from Dylan because she certainly didn’t get one. He appeared to be in the same place. The idea of fathering a child must be terrifying to him.
She remembered Charlie. Not long after their honeymoon, he had a field training mission with the army. They’d been married a whole month when he left for two weeks. When he returned he walked into their small apartment, dropped his duffel and yelled for her. Bellowed for her, which was what he typically did. Katie, baby, come get all over your man! He could be such a caveman. There was a part of her that craved that kind of attention, a part of her that wished he could be a little more civilized. She was so in love she ran to him. He smelled to high heaven, of stale perspiration, mud, two weeks in the field, God knew what all.
She flung herself into his arms, then flung herself out of his arms and ran for the bathroom where she proceeded to hover over the commode, really on the verge.
“I know I smell bad, but that’s a little melodramatic, don’t you think,” he said, standing in the bathroom doorway, unlacing his boots and stripping off his BDU. “Take it easy, I’ll get right in the shower.”
He was down to his fatigue pants, stinky bare feet and broad, delicious, tattooed chest, when she turned watering eyes up to him. “Charlie, I’m pregnant.”
“Oh, baby!” he said, falling to his knees to take her into his arms. “Baby…”
“Charlie!” she yelled. “Shower, for God’s sake! Please!”
“Yeah,” he said, rising and getting rid of what remained of his clothes. “You bet, baby. Then we’ll celebrate! Do pregnant women have sex?” he wanted to know as he turned on the shower.
He was one of a kind, that was for sure. It took a special woman to be married to Charlie Malone and his lifestyle. And it was going to take a lot of patience to make peace with Dylan Childress and draw him safely into her heart. She wondered if she had the time or the faith.
With her eyes closed, she thought about the differences between Charlie and Dylan…and their similarities. Both shockingly handsome, smart and confident men, at first glance you’d think they were alike. Beyond those obvious similarities they were opposites. Charlie was bold while Dylan was more reserved. Charlie grabbed what he wanted without the slightest hesitation while there were lots of emotional connections that still terrified Dylan. Charlie had waited a long time to really fall in love but once he recognized it, he was all in. Dylan had too many childhood ghosts to make that leap of faith.
Both men were phenomenal lovers; she could never have resisted either one of them.
She must have nodded off in the warm, beach sunshine because she felt Dylan curve around her. He was lying on his side, his arm casually crossing over her waist. His breath was warm on her ear and inhaled her scent, exhaling slowly. He nuzzled her softly. “Don’t fall asleep, honey,” he said. “We have to watch the time. The boys…”
She smiled and snuggled a little closer. He remembered they had to pick up the twins. And stop by her brother’s house.
Yes, it was going to take a special kind of patience to let him know he’d be safe with her. And she would require a special kind of courage to take a chance on him. Green Berets were a piece of cake compared to movie stars.
Dylan sensed a sort of peacefulness about Katie as they left the beach and drove back to Virgin River. Or maybe it was just that she wasn’t as uptight about this peacemaking confrontation with Conner as he was. He remained quiet while Katie talked about Dylan’s mysterious special pizza for dinner, about how to make peace with her bear, about how the sound of the waves had been so relaxing she’d fallen asleep, but then she was so sleepy these days she could fall asleep standing up.
“I know I’m not very talkative right now, Katie, but it’s not you,” he said.
“I don’t care, Dylan, because my mind is made up about how I’m moving forward. I’m sure when you work out a few things in your head, you’ll talk a little more.”
He turned toward her. “Exactly,” he said.
When they pulled up to the little prefab schoolhouse, the boys were busy on the play set that Dylan had helped to erect. “Katie, when we get to Conner’s house, can you get the boys occupied with something so I can talk to your brother without the boys around?”
“If you promise you’re not using that as an excuse to get into a fistfight…”
“Look at my eye. You think I want to sacrifice the other one? I just want to talk to him, but if he gets angry the boys shouldn’t be there. If you want to, I can take you and the guys home and come back by myself for this talk.”
“No—I’ll find them something on TV they can watch. But behave!”
He didn’t reply to that but he didn’t feel that he was the loose cannon—behaving was his sole intention. And he knew the road to hell was paved with good intentions.
He and Katie got to Conner and Leslie’s house before they were home from work. “The door will be unlocked,” she said. “I’ll take the kids in and get them settled in front of the TV with a snack. Conner has a few of their favorite movies and games here. Would you like something to drink?”
“How would he feel about me having a beer from his refrigerator?”
She flashed him a teasing smile, lifting her brow. “Need a little calming courage?”
“Baby, after what I learned about an hour ago, I should probably have a six-pack. I’ll wait on the front porch.”
He leaned against the porch rail and waited. This must be what it felt like to be a teenage boy who was meeting a girl’s father when he’d gotten her in trouble, except it was probably the rare father who launched an attack. Even with all the siblings Dylan had, he’d never been close enough to one to feel that kind of protectiveness. In fact, he felt more protective toward Katie after knowing her for half a summer than he ever had toward one of his own family members. He wondered if that little bun in the oven was making the difference.
She finally brought him a beer. “Sure you don’t want to come inside?”
“Nope,” he said. He walked down the porch steps.
“Where are you going?”
He turned to look at her. “I’m not doing this in front of you, Katie. I mean, you might see us, but I’m not having this conversation for your entertainment.”
“Trust me, I don’t feel real entertained.”
“If I’m away from the house, you won’t be tempted to put in your two cents’ worth.”
“Well, jeez, you’re a little bossy there, aren’t you?”
“Making us a very well-matched set, when you think about it,” he said, and he walked back to the street where her SUV was parked. He leaned against it. It was his own damn fault he had this mess to clean up and he was going to figure it out before it got any worse. When he thought about what Lang would do it didn’t really help his situation much. Lang wouldn’t hesitate to try to convince his woman to marry him, provided the woman had been Sue Ann.
Finally the yellow SUV that Leslie drove pulled up to the house and into the drive, all the way forward to the carport. Right behind her was Conner in his great big truck and Dylan thought, I should’ve rented a bigger truck. Conner got out of the truck and briefly glared at Dylan, and Dylan had to look at the ground in front of his crossed legs to keep from laughing. Conner had white tape across his rather swollen, purple nose.
