When we hit the hospital, we were immediately directed to the intensive care unit. I was surprised to find the tiny waiting room full of familiar faces. Lane was propped up on one wall, straw cowboy hat pulled low over his forehead. Brynn’s unmistakable red hair fell over his arm as he held the tall woman to his chest. Her shoulders were shaking which indicated she was probably crying, but the shudder was light and barely noticeable. Wyatt was sitting in a chair on one side of Cyrus, Grady sat on the other. Both men were dressed in expensive looking suits sporting sharp creases and there wasn’t a sign of either having been adrift in the woods for weeks. They had paperwork in their hands, badges and guns clipped to their belts, and both appeared to be asking Cy questions. Minus the camo face paint, Wyatt’s resemblance to his younger brother was startling. They could pass for twins, save for the hardness in Webb, a resilience that had propelled him through the wilderness, wounded and weak with no hesitation. Wyatt grinned up at us as Cy’s eyes locked on our little party and flared to life with something that was more powerful and more important than anything anyone had ever looked at me with before.
Irritation.
Relief.
Pride.
Passion.
Possession.
Regret.
It was all there, flashing between the blinks of his inky lashes as he got to his feet and took the few steps required for him to reach me. Our entire short, tragic, and triumphant relationship shone out of his eyes as he pulled me into his arms in a hug that was tight enough to crack ribs. I put my arms around his waist and squeezed him back just as hard. I dropped my head to the center of his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart, deciding it was the best sound I ever heard. I breathed what felt like the first easy breath I had had in decades. He was just as solid, just as sure and indomitable as he seemed the first minute I laid eyes on him, but now there were cracks in the mortar that held him together and I could feel his emotions leaking out of them. I also felt his lips touch the top of my head in a kiss that was meant to settle us both. It turned my insides liquid and it made my eyes well up again.
I had to clear my throat twice before I was able to ask him which room Emrys was in. She was the only person missing from this somber gathering.
Cy also pushed out a breath and needed to take a minute before he could make his gruff and scratchy sounding voice work. Finally looking at him with clear eyes, I could see that it looked like he hadn’t slept in a week. He had dark circles under his eyes and the lines around his eyes and mouth seemed to have dug in even deeper. I knew it was probably just a trick of the bad hospital lighting, but I also swore the silver specks in his hair had doubled and crawled up well into his hairline. He looked worn and worried, older than he had a week ago.
“Em’s in the room with Sutton. It’s bad, Leo, really bad. Right now machines are basically keeping him alive and the room is sterile. He hasn’t opened his eyes or responded to anything since they loaded him onto the helicopter. His blood pressure has crashed twice and the surgeon has opted to put off a second surgery to pull pieces of the bullet out of him because he’s so unstable. They’re really worried about infection. Only one of us at a time can be in there with him and we can’t step into the room until we gown and glove up.” He shook his dark head and pulled me close so that he could rest his chin on the top of my head. His sigh sent my hair dancing and pressed his chest into mine. “Em is in a bad way, too. Out of it, not making much sense when the DEA talked to her. She was hysterical and they had to medicate her to calm her down.” I felt his fingers tense on my waist as I swallowed the lump in my throat his words raised up. “She went missing in the middle of the night last night. The nurses went in to check on her and couldn’t find her. They were getting ready to call the cops and start a floor-by-floor search when someone was smart enough to pop into Sutton’s room. Your girl was curled up in the chair next to his bed, talking to him. Who knows if he can hear her, but she just kept talking. Being around my brother got her shit straight.”
If that wasn’t heartbreaking, I didn’t know anything that was. “She was very worried about him. She was convinced he died for her. She’s not going to let go of him without a fight.”
He snorted. “Clearly. We’ve all been rotating turns in his room when the nurses pull her out. Sutton’s ex even managed to get it together enough to bring Daye up so she could see him. That was fucking hard. How are you supposed to explain to a five-year-old that daddy would say hello and tell you that he loved you if he could, but he can’t right now? It was so goddamn heartbreaking. He’s the only solid parent that little girl has. She doesn’t stand a chance if he doesn’t pull through.”
“He’ll pull through.” I whispered the words into his chest.
“You think so?”
I nodded and felt the crown of my head bop into his chin. “I know so.” God, I hoped so. If Sutton was the only thing keeping Emrys tied together right now, then I needed him to pull through. He was a good man, and good men deserved more than that kind of ending. “And you won’t let anything happen to that little girl. She’s your family and you protect your family, Cy. You won’t let her go, regardless of what happens with Sutton.” I knew that with certainty; that went all the way to my marrow.
He hugged me again, and finally pulled away but didn’t let me go all of the way. His long fingers curled around mine and he tucked me tightly into his side like he’d hated every minute it took me to get out of the woods and back to his side. I had never been the type of woman who was strong enough for someone else to lean on. My foundation was weak and the ground I stood on was full of hidden crevices that went deep and dark into my soul. For this man, I could be a pillar. He taught me how. He showed me I could stand and not fall, even with someone else’s considerable weight leaning into me for support. I could be just as unmovable and as strong as he was. I could hold him up effortlessly, because I knew he would do the same for me and I knew his need for someone to prop him up was temporary. He bore the weight of responsibility for everyone and everything all the time, with his little brother on the brink of dying, there was no way his ballasts weren’t taking on more than they could handle.
Irritation.
Relief.
Pride.
Passion.
Possession.
Regret.
It was all there, flashing between the blinks of his inky lashes as he got to his feet and took the few steps required for him to reach me. Our entire short, tragic, and triumphant relationship shone out of his eyes as he pulled me into his arms in a hug that was tight enough to crack ribs. I put my arms around his waist and squeezed him back just as hard. I dropped my head to the center of his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart, deciding it was the best sound I ever heard. I breathed what felt like the first easy breath I had had in decades. He was just as solid, just as sure and indomitable as he seemed the first minute I laid eyes on him, but now there were cracks in the mortar that held him together and I could feel his emotions leaking out of them. I also felt his lips touch the top of my head in a kiss that was meant to settle us both. It turned my insides liquid and it made my eyes well up again.
I had to clear my throat twice before I was able to ask him which room Emrys was in. She was the only person missing from this somber gathering.
Cy also pushed out a breath and needed to take a minute before he could make his gruff and scratchy sounding voice work. Finally looking at him with clear eyes, I could see that it looked like he hadn’t slept in a week. He had dark circles under his eyes and the lines around his eyes and mouth seemed to have dug in even deeper. I knew it was probably just a trick of the bad hospital lighting, but I also swore the silver specks in his hair had doubled and crawled up well into his hairline. He looked worn and worried, older than he had a week ago.
“Em’s in the room with Sutton. It’s bad, Leo, really bad. Right now machines are basically keeping him alive and the room is sterile. He hasn’t opened his eyes or responded to anything since they loaded him onto the helicopter. His blood pressure has crashed twice and the surgeon has opted to put off a second surgery to pull pieces of the bullet out of him because he’s so unstable. They’re really worried about infection. Only one of us at a time can be in there with him and we can’t step into the room until we gown and glove up.” He shook his dark head and pulled me close so that he could rest his chin on the top of my head. His sigh sent my hair dancing and pressed his chest into mine. “Em is in a bad way, too. Out of it, not making much sense when the DEA talked to her. She was hysterical and they had to medicate her to calm her down.” I felt his fingers tense on my waist as I swallowed the lump in my throat his words raised up. “She went missing in the middle of the night last night. The nurses went in to check on her and couldn’t find her. They were getting ready to call the cops and start a floor-by-floor search when someone was smart enough to pop into Sutton’s room. Your girl was curled up in the chair next to his bed, talking to him. Who knows if he can hear her, but she just kept talking. Being around my brother got her shit straight.”
If that wasn’t heartbreaking, I didn’t know anything that was. “She was very worried about him. She was convinced he died for her. She’s not going to let go of him without a fight.”
He snorted. “Clearly. We’ve all been rotating turns in his room when the nurses pull her out. Sutton’s ex even managed to get it together enough to bring Daye up so she could see him. That was fucking hard. How are you supposed to explain to a five-year-old that daddy would say hello and tell you that he loved you if he could, but he can’t right now? It was so goddamn heartbreaking. He’s the only solid parent that little girl has. She doesn’t stand a chance if he doesn’t pull through.”
“He’ll pull through.” I whispered the words into his chest.
“You think so?”
I nodded and felt the crown of my head bop into his chin. “I know so.” God, I hoped so. If Sutton was the only thing keeping Emrys tied together right now, then I needed him to pull through. He was a good man, and good men deserved more than that kind of ending. “And you won’t let anything happen to that little girl. She’s your family and you protect your family, Cy. You won’t let her go, regardless of what happens with Sutton.” I knew that with certainty; that went all the way to my marrow.
He hugged me again, and finally pulled away but didn’t let me go all of the way. His long fingers curled around mine and he tucked me tightly into his side like he’d hated every minute it took me to get out of the woods and back to his side. I had never been the type of woman who was strong enough for someone else to lean on. My foundation was weak and the ground I stood on was full of hidden crevices that went deep and dark into my soul. For this man, I could be a pillar. He taught me how. He showed me I could stand and not fall, even with someone else’s considerable weight leaning into me for support. I could be just as unmovable and as strong as he was. I could hold him up effortlessly, because I knew he would do the same for me and I knew his need for someone to prop him up was temporary. He bore the weight of responsibility for everyone and everything all the time, with his little brother on the brink of dying, there was no way his ballasts weren’t taking on more than they could handle.
