“Fuck.” Trevor dropped his head backward and looked at the ceiling. Running. He loved running now. Mom, Blake, Rock Solid... though maybe Rock Solid wasn’t something he would have to enjoy or be thankful for soon. Not if they weren’t working enough.
“It takes time to get a business off the ground, Trev.”
“No shit,” he replied. It pissed him off when his brother pretended to know better than Trevor did. As though Trevor was stupid just because he’d been an addict like their dad.
“It happens. It wasn’t your fault. We can’t get them all.”
He groaned. “Please don’t try and make me feel better.” It only made him feel like more of a fuck up, though he knew that wasn’t what Blake wanted to do.
“Excuse me for trying to help.” Blake pushed to his feet.
“It doesn’t. It makes me feel like shit.”
“Fuck you, Trev. You can be a real asshole, you know that?”
He did know it. He also knew he wasn’t going to give up this job without a fight. Things changed. He didn’t walk away from his problems. Not anymore.
Without replying to Blake, he grabbed his truck keys from the counter and pushed past his brother. That easily, Blake knew exactly what Trevor had planned.
“Don’t do this, Trev. You’re just going to make things worse.”
Not this time. His days of making things worse were in the past.
***
Simon sat on the edge of his bed when the pounding on his front door started. His heart jumped, thinking something was wrong, until he made his way to the window to see Trevor standing on his porch.
Bang, bang, bang.
The fist of his good hand came down on the door again. His good hand. He had one good and one bad, just the way Simon did, only Trevor’s would heal completely, and surgery hadn’t done the job for Simon’s.
But then he realized what was going on here. Who the hell did this kid think he was, banging on Simon’s door like that? Simon made his way into the living room and jerked the door open. “What the hell are you doing?”
“Asking you to reconsider,” Trevor said through pursed lips.
“Asking me to reconsider? You thought by coming to my home at seven thirty on a Saturday morning, and banging on my door, you’d get me to consider hiring your company? Think again, kid.”
Trevor pushed his hand through his dark hair, and winced. Simon knew how sore it had to be if he wasn’t taking anything for it. “I’m not a kid.”
No, Simon guessed he wasn’t. He probably had ten years on Trevor, but he wasn’t a kid. “You’re acting like one. This is business. I made the best business decision for myself. It happens. Get used to it.”
Simon tried to close the door but Trevor’s left hand shot out and stopped it. He opened his mouth to tell the guy to back the hell off when Trevor spoke. “Is it because you realized I’m in recovery? I’ve been clean for over a year. No slip-ups. My past isn’t pretty but I’m working on changing that. It isn’t going to affect the job.”
The pain in Trevor’s voice radiated off him, slamming into Simon. He got that kind of pain. He felt it. And it took balls for Trevor to admit his past to Simon.
“It’s not that.”
Trevor sighed. “I can promise you we’ll do a good job. I’ll drive you around and show you jobs we’ve done. Hell, I’ll do some work for you outside of the remodel, no charge, just so you can see my work ethic.”
“Your hand—”
“Please,” Trevor cut him off. “I have no right to ask you this. I have no right to be here. I get it. But I’m here asking you anyway. We’ll do a damn good job for you. I’ll make sure of it. I’m trying to get my shit together, and I know that’s not your problem. My past, my problem. But I’m also trying not to take other people down with me. If I keep them from getting work, that’s what I’m doing. I’m trying to move on. My past isn’t who I am.” He shrugged as though he had nothing else in him to give. The darkness in his eyes said he hated what he already gave. Hated asking, and giving Simon that piece of him.
Simon got that too.
“Who are you?” Simon found himself asking. It was a strange question. He didn’t know where in the hell it had come from, but the man said his past wasn’t who he was. Simon suddenly wanted to know who he thought he’d become.
“That’s what I’m trying to figure out,” he replied. Trevor’s words bounced around in his head. They mirrored Simon.
