“You’re… serious.”
“Can you handle not knowing who I was?” He nipped the sensitive skin between her thumb and forefinger before laving it with his tongue. “Can you deal with the man I am now?”
“Yes,” she whispered in a husky rasp. “Oh, yes.”
“Good,” he said, lowering his mouth to her throat. “Because the man I am now is who I want to be. Forever.”
At Reseph’s admission, Jillian’s heart thundered against what remained of the wall that surrounded it. Since the day Reseph had arrived, the wall had been cracking, and each passing day saw the fissures deepen. Now this wonderful man had committed himself to her, leaving behind his past and making her his future. No man had ever given up anything for her, and as her heartbeat knocked down the last shard of barrier that stood between her and surrender, she thanked her good fortune.
Before Reseph, the independent woman in her would have railed against any man telling her she was his, but with him it seemed natural, respectful.
And oh, so sexy.
And speaking of sexy, Reseph concentrated kisses on her throat, each one moving a fraction of an inch lower, his lips following her jugular to the base of her neck. Desire spiraled through her, growing more and more out of control with every passing second. Yet Reseph still wasn’t touching her where she needed to be touched.
The man was a sadist. A master of torture. His erection sat heavily against her sex, but no matter how much she writhed, he didn’t make a move to enter her. She ached, burned, wanted.
“So impatient,” he murmured against her clavicle.
“I’m not impatient.” She thrust her hands into his gorgeous, silky hair to guide his mouth lower, which totally made her a liar. “You’ve been teasing me since the bar. I’m ready.”
His husky chuckle accompanied his hand dipping between her legs and finding her slick wetness. “Oh, yeah, you’re ready.” His lips trailed over the mound of her breast, and his tongue came out to taste her nipple. “I love how you respond to me. Only me.” That last bit came out as a carnal growl, and a rush of liquid lust dampened her core. He growled again, slipping two fingers inside her.
Lost to pleasure, she threw her head back and concentrated on breathing as his fingers worked their magic. He covered her breast with his mouth, drawing against her nipple, his warm tongue swirling and caressing. The combination of his fingers thrusting inside her and his mouth suckling her breast was intoxicating. She felt drunk with sensation, almost overwhelmed, because all of this was so much more than physical.
Reseph was pouring emotion into every slow caress, every smoldering kiss, every honeyed, reverent endearment he whispered against her skin. Beautiful. Amazing. Mine. There were even a few words mixed in that she didn’t recognize but understood anyway. He was taking her. Marking her. Even if, afterward, she didn’t have a single scratch, bite, or ache, he’d have left his mark indelibly in her mind and heart.
His fingers pumped faster, taking her higher. “That’s it,” he rasped against her breast. “God, I love the way you move.”
He feathered his thumb over her clit, just skimming the crest. She cried out with both pleasure and frustration. He did it again, this time with more pressure, and her cry was louder.
“Please,” she gasped. “Now.”
A rattling purr erupted from his chest as he shifted to nudge her thighs wide with his legs. He looked down, watching his hand working her, and that purr went deeper. He twisted his fingers and stroked his thumb through her slit, pressing lightly on her knot of nerves… pressing, not moving, and oh, God, yes…
She shouted in total abandon, bucking into his touch, riding the cl**ax he’d coaxed out of her with teasing touches, hot talk, and sweet pledges. The orgasm seemed to go on and on, and even before the throbbing fire had completely waned, Reseph was on his knees between her legs, his erection curved into his abs as he reached for a condom. His fingers still caressed her sex, but with delicate, indirect strokes.
His gaze smoldered, never leaving her face. He tore the condom wrapper open with his teeth, and in a smooth feat of one-handed dexterity, he removed the condom and rolled it over his straining length. His muscles flexed as he prowled forward over her body, covering her, putting the tip of his c**k at her entrance.
Still keeping eye contact, he slid inside her. “I love you,” he said on a breathy moan.
“I love you, too,” she whispered.
A smile ruffled his mouth, and then he closed his eyes and thrust his h*ps slowly. So damned slowly. How did he have such control? She’d already come once, taking the edge off, but she was still worked up enough to want to get things moving.
Pulling up her legs, she wrapped them around his waist, clinging to him fiercely. His pace picked up, the hot friction sparking bolts of ecstasy deep inside her. She clenched around him and he groaned, moving faster. His entire body undulated over her, every muscle tense and rippling, the tendons in his neck standing out starkly.
She was almost there, her body craving another peak. She panted at the upward momentum, the heat between them, the raw, animal lust. Her heart hammered violently, and her breaths came in short, choppy bursts.
“Jillian,” he gasped. “You feel… so… good…” He threw his head back, baring his teeth, pounding into her. “I feel you… coming.”
She went over the edge with him, his shout mingling with hers. A firestorm of pleasure seared her from the inside out.
“My… God,” he groaned, his h*ps still pumping in spastic twitches. His eyes were mere slits as he sagged on top of her, burying his face in her neck. His breaths were harsh against her skin, but his hands were gentle as he stroked her face, her hair, her shoulders.
Every muscle in her body had turned to Jell-O, but she held him tight, tapping strength from some hidden reserve.
“Thank you,” she said into his hair. “You’ve given me so much.”
With a grunt, he rolled off her, but he didn’t get out of bed. He tucked her against him, twining his legs with hers. “I haven’t given you nearly enough.” He kissed her forehead. “But I’ll start working on that.”
Her chest swelled with happiness. “And tomorrow… I guess today, really, let’s go get a Christmas tree. I haven’t celebrated a proper holiday since my parents died. So let’s start off our new life with Christmas.”
He smiled. “It’ll be sort of like my first.”
“Mine too,” she whispered. “Mine too.”
Nineteen
Reseph woke to the sound of a scream. He bolted upright, reaching for Jillian, but her side of the bed was empty. Hoping to God he’d been dreaming, he scrambled out of bed and tugged on his jeans. And then… another scream. Jillian’s scream.
Instant, bone-chilling terror and panic ripped through him. Barefoot, he charged through the house and tore open the front door with such force that it snapped the hinges.
Jillian was standing on the porch, face pale, eyes wide. A few yards away, Ares, Thanatos, and Limos were lined up, armored, and mounted on their horses.
“My brothers!” Grinning like a fool, his heart bounding with sudden excitement, he started for them. “Limos!”
“Reseph?” Jillian’s voice was shaken.
“It’s okay,” he said, giving her arm a rub as he walked past. “It’s my family. I can’t wait for you to meet them. Come on.”
“You… you remember?”
“Yup.” Freaky, but yeah, it was all coming back to him.
He took the steps down in two strides, but even as he hit the snowy ground below, he realized something was wrong. No one looked happy to see him. In fact, their expressions ranged from wary distrust, to downright hate in Thanatos’s case. What the hell—
A memory struck him like one of Jillian’s frying pans… Thanatos, holding him down, jamming Deliverance into his chest as nearby, a baby cried. But why…?
More memories came at him, rapid-fire, like bullets from an automatic weapon. His head snapped back as a wall of horror blindsided him. He stumbled, his equilibrium thrown off by the weight of the sudden recollections.
Blood. Screams. Hate… so much hate. The world spun, the ground giving way beneath him, and he crashed to his knees, clutching his head. Hands came down on his back… Jillian’s. She was speaking, asking if he was okay. Asking what was wrong, but he couldn’t speak. More screams… the screams of those he’d hurt. Countless numbers of them. Oh… God.
“No,” he rasped. “Oh… please, no.”
His stomach turned over, and he lurched, half-crawled, half-stumbled away from her and to the nearest tree, where everything he’d eaten in the last week, month, maybe year, came up. He lost it. Lost everything. Including, possibly, his mind.
What was happening?
Jillian stood in the snow, unable to process any of this. The strange, armored people on their horses watched Reseph break away from Jillian, curiously detached. Until he screamed and threw himself against the tree, slamming his head into the trunk over and over.
“Reseph!” She darted toward him, but before she’d gone five steps, arms came around her and she was held tightly by the huge man with blond braids at his temples and yellow hawk eyes. “Let me go!” She kicked and punched, but she might as well have been beating on an elephant. “Release me, you bastard!”
A godawful roar shook the very air, and Reseph spun, his face dripping blood, his teeth bared. Fury blazed in his crimson eyes as they locked onto the man holding her. He charged, but in a blur she couldn’t comprehend until it was over, the guy in leather armor was off his horse and tackling Reseph. Leather Man jammed something that looked like an EpiPen into his throat, and Reseph went completely, utterly still.
“What did you do?” she screamed. “Reseph!”
“He’s okay, female.” The man holding her palmed her forehead. “I’ll make this all go away.”
“No!” The black-haired woman rushed toward them, her armor, samurai in appearance, collecting snow in the joints as she ran. “Thanatos, don’t. You can’t go back far enough. Let her remember this.”
The man samurai called Thanatos tugged Jillian even closer, until she could feel the chill coming off his white armor. What was it made of, anyway? Bone?
“We can rearrange this, Limos,” Thanatos said. “Make her believe Reseph walked out on her.”
The woman named Limos shook her head. “I promised Arik I wouldn’t mess with anyone’s memories again.”
Memories? These people could mess with memories? Erase things? What was going on?
Thanatos rolled his eyes. “The things you do for that human.”
Behind Limos, the big man in leather armor spoke, and the stallion he’d been riding poofed into smoke and shot into his gauntlet.
Jillian was seeing things. None of this was real. It couldn’t be. But it seemed very real when the man threw Reseph over his shoulder, took a couple of steps, and disappeared into thin air.
“No,” Jillian whispered. “No. Bring him back.” She struggled uselessly against her captor’s hold. “Bring him back, you son of a bitch!”
“Let her go, Than,” the woman said. “Go help Ares with Reseph. I’ll take care of this.”
Take care of this? Terror burst through Jillian. Was the woman going to kill her?
Thanatos released Jillian, and the sudden lack of support sent her sprawling in the snow. “Sorry, female,” he said gruffly, and offered his hand.
As if. Jillian scrambled backward in an uncoordinated tangle of limbs until she hit the base of the steps and used them to get to her feet. She stood there, panting and freaking out, as Thanatos muttered something and his horse… oh, Jesus, really? His horse dissolved into smoke like the first one and shot into his gauntlet.
Jillian swayed, her head spinning, her heart pounding impossibly fast. Don’t pass out. Do not pass out in front of these people. She reached out and clutched the railing as hard as she could, praying hard that she’d stay conscious.
Thanatos took a step and disappeared as quickly as the other man had, leaving her alone with the woman and her black stallion. At least, Jillian thought it might be a horse. But she’d never seen a horse with razor-sharp teeth, red eyes, and hooves that created steam in the snow.
Terror was a cold fist around her heart, squeezing so hard and fast that her blood felt like it might explode from her veins. This was a nightmare. She was stuck in a horrible nightmare and reality was sliding right out from under her feet. She must have been speaking her thoughts out loud, because the other woman shook her head.
“This isn’t a nightmare. It’s all real. My name is Limos. What’s yours?”
Jillian swallowed. “J-Jillian. Who… are you?”
“I’m Reseph’s sister. Thanatos and Ares are his brothers.” Limos glanced around, her sharp, amethyst eyes seeming to take in everything. “Nice place. Look, Reseph has been missing for a few months. We didn’t even know he was alive until last night. Where did you find him?”
“In a snowbank,” she said hoarsely. “He… he didn’t remember anything but his name.”
Limos nodded. “Yeah, that’s what we were told. Looks like you took good care of him. Thank you.”
Thank you? Something about Limos’s gratitude struck Jillian as ridiculous, given that they’d knocked out Reseph and then kidnapped him. Sudden anger replaced her fear, and she released the post to get up in Limos’s face.
“Where did your brothers take him? Why did he freak out like that? What the hell is going on?”
“Can you handle not knowing who I was?” He nipped the sensitive skin between her thumb and forefinger before laving it with his tongue. “Can you deal with the man I am now?”
“Yes,” she whispered in a husky rasp. “Oh, yes.”
“Good,” he said, lowering his mouth to her throat. “Because the man I am now is who I want to be. Forever.”
At Reseph’s admission, Jillian’s heart thundered against what remained of the wall that surrounded it. Since the day Reseph had arrived, the wall had been cracking, and each passing day saw the fissures deepen. Now this wonderful man had committed himself to her, leaving behind his past and making her his future. No man had ever given up anything for her, and as her heartbeat knocked down the last shard of barrier that stood between her and surrender, she thanked her good fortune.
Before Reseph, the independent woman in her would have railed against any man telling her she was his, but with him it seemed natural, respectful.
And oh, so sexy.
And speaking of sexy, Reseph concentrated kisses on her throat, each one moving a fraction of an inch lower, his lips following her jugular to the base of her neck. Desire spiraled through her, growing more and more out of control with every passing second. Yet Reseph still wasn’t touching her where she needed to be touched.
The man was a sadist. A master of torture. His erection sat heavily against her sex, but no matter how much she writhed, he didn’t make a move to enter her. She ached, burned, wanted.
“So impatient,” he murmured against her clavicle.
“I’m not impatient.” She thrust her hands into his gorgeous, silky hair to guide his mouth lower, which totally made her a liar. “You’ve been teasing me since the bar. I’m ready.”
His husky chuckle accompanied his hand dipping between her legs and finding her slick wetness. “Oh, yeah, you’re ready.” His lips trailed over the mound of her breast, and his tongue came out to taste her nipple. “I love how you respond to me. Only me.” That last bit came out as a carnal growl, and a rush of liquid lust dampened her core. He growled again, slipping two fingers inside her.
Lost to pleasure, she threw her head back and concentrated on breathing as his fingers worked their magic. He covered her breast with his mouth, drawing against her nipple, his warm tongue swirling and caressing. The combination of his fingers thrusting inside her and his mouth suckling her breast was intoxicating. She felt drunk with sensation, almost overwhelmed, because all of this was so much more than physical.
Reseph was pouring emotion into every slow caress, every smoldering kiss, every honeyed, reverent endearment he whispered against her skin. Beautiful. Amazing. Mine. There were even a few words mixed in that she didn’t recognize but understood anyway. He was taking her. Marking her. Even if, afterward, she didn’t have a single scratch, bite, or ache, he’d have left his mark indelibly in her mind and heart.
His fingers pumped faster, taking her higher. “That’s it,” he rasped against her breast. “God, I love the way you move.”
He feathered his thumb over her clit, just skimming the crest. She cried out with both pleasure and frustration. He did it again, this time with more pressure, and her cry was louder.
“Please,” she gasped. “Now.”
A rattling purr erupted from his chest as he shifted to nudge her thighs wide with his legs. He looked down, watching his hand working her, and that purr went deeper. He twisted his fingers and stroked his thumb through her slit, pressing lightly on her knot of nerves… pressing, not moving, and oh, God, yes…
She shouted in total abandon, bucking into his touch, riding the cl**ax he’d coaxed out of her with teasing touches, hot talk, and sweet pledges. The orgasm seemed to go on and on, and even before the throbbing fire had completely waned, Reseph was on his knees between her legs, his erection curved into his abs as he reached for a condom. His fingers still caressed her sex, but with delicate, indirect strokes.
His gaze smoldered, never leaving her face. He tore the condom wrapper open with his teeth, and in a smooth feat of one-handed dexterity, he removed the condom and rolled it over his straining length. His muscles flexed as he prowled forward over her body, covering her, putting the tip of his c**k at her entrance.
Still keeping eye contact, he slid inside her. “I love you,” he said on a breathy moan.
“I love you, too,” she whispered.
A smile ruffled his mouth, and then he closed his eyes and thrust his h*ps slowly. So damned slowly. How did he have such control? She’d already come once, taking the edge off, but she was still worked up enough to want to get things moving.
Pulling up her legs, she wrapped them around his waist, clinging to him fiercely. His pace picked up, the hot friction sparking bolts of ecstasy deep inside her. She clenched around him and he groaned, moving faster. His entire body undulated over her, every muscle tense and rippling, the tendons in his neck standing out starkly.
She was almost there, her body craving another peak. She panted at the upward momentum, the heat between them, the raw, animal lust. Her heart hammered violently, and her breaths came in short, choppy bursts.
“Jillian,” he gasped. “You feel… so… good…” He threw his head back, baring his teeth, pounding into her. “I feel you… coming.”
She went over the edge with him, his shout mingling with hers. A firestorm of pleasure seared her from the inside out.
“My… God,” he groaned, his h*ps still pumping in spastic twitches. His eyes were mere slits as he sagged on top of her, burying his face in her neck. His breaths were harsh against her skin, but his hands were gentle as he stroked her face, her hair, her shoulders.
Every muscle in her body had turned to Jell-O, but she held him tight, tapping strength from some hidden reserve.
“Thank you,” she said into his hair. “You’ve given me so much.”
With a grunt, he rolled off her, but he didn’t get out of bed. He tucked her against him, twining his legs with hers. “I haven’t given you nearly enough.” He kissed her forehead. “But I’ll start working on that.”
Her chest swelled with happiness. “And tomorrow… I guess today, really, let’s go get a Christmas tree. I haven’t celebrated a proper holiday since my parents died. So let’s start off our new life with Christmas.”
He smiled. “It’ll be sort of like my first.”
“Mine too,” she whispered. “Mine too.”
Nineteen
Reseph woke to the sound of a scream. He bolted upright, reaching for Jillian, but her side of the bed was empty. Hoping to God he’d been dreaming, he scrambled out of bed and tugged on his jeans. And then… another scream. Jillian’s scream.
Instant, bone-chilling terror and panic ripped through him. Barefoot, he charged through the house and tore open the front door with such force that it snapped the hinges.
Jillian was standing on the porch, face pale, eyes wide. A few yards away, Ares, Thanatos, and Limos were lined up, armored, and mounted on their horses.
“My brothers!” Grinning like a fool, his heart bounding with sudden excitement, he started for them. “Limos!”
“Reseph?” Jillian’s voice was shaken.
“It’s okay,” he said, giving her arm a rub as he walked past. “It’s my family. I can’t wait for you to meet them. Come on.”
“You… you remember?”
“Yup.” Freaky, but yeah, it was all coming back to him.
He took the steps down in two strides, but even as he hit the snowy ground below, he realized something was wrong. No one looked happy to see him. In fact, their expressions ranged from wary distrust, to downright hate in Thanatos’s case. What the hell—
A memory struck him like one of Jillian’s frying pans… Thanatos, holding him down, jamming Deliverance into his chest as nearby, a baby cried. But why…?
More memories came at him, rapid-fire, like bullets from an automatic weapon. His head snapped back as a wall of horror blindsided him. He stumbled, his equilibrium thrown off by the weight of the sudden recollections.
Blood. Screams. Hate… so much hate. The world spun, the ground giving way beneath him, and he crashed to his knees, clutching his head. Hands came down on his back… Jillian’s. She was speaking, asking if he was okay. Asking what was wrong, but he couldn’t speak. More screams… the screams of those he’d hurt. Countless numbers of them. Oh… God.
“No,” he rasped. “Oh… please, no.”
His stomach turned over, and he lurched, half-crawled, half-stumbled away from her and to the nearest tree, where everything he’d eaten in the last week, month, maybe year, came up. He lost it. Lost everything. Including, possibly, his mind.
What was happening?
Jillian stood in the snow, unable to process any of this. The strange, armored people on their horses watched Reseph break away from Jillian, curiously detached. Until he screamed and threw himself against the tree, slamming his head into the trunk over and over.
“Reseph!” She darted toward him, but before she’d gone five steps, arms came around her and she was held tightly by the huge man with blond braids at his temples and yellow hawk eyes. “Let me go!” She kicked and punched, but she might as well have been beating on an elephant. “Release me, you bastard!”
A godawful roar shook the very air, and Reseph spun, his face dripping blood, his teeth bared. Fury blazed in his crimson eyes as they locked onto the man holding her. He charged, but in a blur she couldn’t comprehend until it was over, the guy in leather armor was off his horse and tackling Reseph. Leather Man jammed something that looked like an EpiPen into his throat, and Reseph went completely, utterly still.
“What did you do?” she screamed. “Reseph!”
“He’s okay, female.” The man holding her palmed her forehead. “I’ll make this all go away.”
“No!” The black-haired woman rushed toward them, her armor, samurai in appearance, collecting snow in the joints as she ran. “Thanatos, don’t. You can’t go back far enough. Let her remember this.”
The man samurai called Thanatos tugged Jillian even closer, until she could feel the chill coming off his white armor. What was it made of, anyway? Bone?
“We can rearrange this, Limos,” Thanatos said. “Make her believe Reseph walked out on her.”
The woman named Limos shook her head. “I promised Arik I wouldn’t mess with anyone’s memories again.”
Memories? These people could mess with memories? Erase things? What was going on?
Thanatos rolled his eyes. “The things you do for that human.”
Behind Limos, the big man in leather armor spoke, and the stallion he’d been riding poofed into smoke and shot into his gauntlet.
Jillian was seeing things. None of this was real. It couldn’t be. But it seemed very real when the man threw Reseph over his shoulder, took a couple of steps, and disappeared into thin air.
“No,” Jillian whispered. “No. Bring him back.” She struggled uselessly against her captor’s hold. “Bring him back, you son of a bitch!”
“Let her go, Than,” the woman said. “Go help Ares with Reseph. I’ll take care of this.”
Take care of this? Terror burst through Jillian. Was the woman going to kill her?
Thanatos released Jillian, and the sudden lack of support sent her sprawling in the snow. “Sorry, female,” he said gruffly, and offered his hand.
As if. Jillian scrambled backward in an uncoordinated tangle of limbs until she hit the base of the steps and used them to get to her feet. She stood there, panting and freaking out, as Thanatos muttered something and his horse… oh, Jesus, really? His horse dissolved into smoke like the first one and shot into his gauntlet.
Jillian swayed, her head spinning, her heart pounding impossibly fast. Don’t pass out. Do not pass out in front of these people. She reached out and clutched the railing as hard as she could, praying hard that she’d stay conscious.
Thanatos took a step and disappeared as quickly as the other man had, leaving her alone with the woman and her black stallion. At least, Jillian thought it might be a horse. But she’d never seen a horse with razor-sharp teeth, red eyes, and hooves that created steam in the snow.
Terror was a cold fist around her heart, squeezing so hard and fast that her blood felt like it might explode from her veins. This was a nightmare. She was stuck in a horrible nightmare and reality was sliding right out from under her feet. She must have been speaking her thoughts out loud, because the other woman shook her head.
“This isn’t a nightmare. It’s all real. My name is Limos. What’s yours?”
Jillian swallowed. “J-Jillian. Who… are you?”
“I’m Reseph’s sister. Thanatos and Ares are his brothers.” Limos glanced around, her sharp, amethyst eyes seeming to take in everything. “Nice place. Look, Reseph has been missing for a few months. We didn’t even know he was alive until last night. Where did you find him?”
“In a snowbank,” she said hoarsely. “He… he didn’t remember anything but his name.”
Limos nodded. “Yeah, that’s what we were told. Looks like you took good care of him. Thank you.”
Thank you? Something about Limos’s gratitude struck Jillian as ridiculous, given that they’d knocked out Reseph and then kidnapped him. Sudden anger replaced her fear, and she released the post to get up in Limos’s face.
“Where did your brothers take him? Why did he freak out like that? What the hell is going on?”
