Rushing the Goal
Page 158
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She shook her head. “Benji, he’s accusing you of the worst thing. That isn’t fair. A normal man would run for the hills.”
“Not this man.”
“But your career—”
“Is nothing without you,” he stressed as a tear rolled down her cheek. “You give me purpose, Lucy. You make me excited to live. And why have a job that, yeah, I love, if I can’t come home and share my accomplishments with you? And that house isn’t a home without you and Angie. You two made that place so full of life. You think I can go back without you? Just because some dude is threatening us with what your dad says is a bogus video? I don’t care about Rick and his lies, I care about you. About us.”
Closing her eyes as his nose touched hers, she shook her head. She had known he was going to be like this. So fearless, impatient to take Rick out. “He could ruin you.”
“I don’t care,” he said simply. “I’d rather lose all that other stuff and still have you and Angie. Because with you two, I have it all.” Her lips trembled as she held his eyes. “I understand it. The love you have for me and wanting to protect me. Believe me, I’d do the same for you, but instead of doing it all alone, let me help. Let me be there with you. Let’s be there for each other.”
Biting into her lip, she slid her hands across his bare back, pressing her lips to the middle of his chest. His skin broke out in gooseflesh and she closed her eyes, knowing she couldn’t leave him if she tried. Well, she had tried, and look at how that turned out.
“What have I told you from the beginning, Lucy?
She opened her eyes, looking up at him. His eyes had so much love, so much meaning, and she knew what he was talking about. “That you’re not going anywhere.”
“Exactly. So do me a favor and make the same promise. If you want to, that is,” he added and she just stared at him. Of course, she wanted this. Him. She was just scared.
“I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t break up with you. When I got here, I thought I would figure it out. And, yeah, it’s only been a day, but all I wanted was you—to call you and tell you so that we could figure it out. I shouldn’t have run from you, but to you.”
He smiled against her lips. “And I would have caught you. I would have hugged you,” he said, wrapping his arms around her, nuzzling his nose into her neck. “And I would have told you I love you, that we’ve got this.”
“I know. I was just so scared.”
“You don’t have to be scared, because I will help fight those demons. Fight Rick. He can’t beat us if we stand together,” he said, pulling back to look at her. “You are my slice of heaven, Lucy, and the thought of not having you is what terrifies me.”
“Me too.”
“So no more disappearing acts, okay?” he said, kissing her nose, and she smiled.
“I can make sure that never happens again.” He smiled back as he dropped his mouth to hers, kissing her ever so slowly, her toes curling in the sand. She had missed him so damn much, and she was pretty sure that his kisses and hugs were what she lived for. As he pulled back, looking down at her, he shook his head. Moving her hand up to his face, she touched him softly, her thumb gliding along his cheek as she held his gaze.
“I’m just so scared, Benji,” she whispered and he kissed her forehead. “I don’t want anything to hurt you. You’ve had enough hurt.”
“The only thing that can hurt me is losing you and Angie. Remember that.”
She smiled, her eyes glossing over. “I hit him. Like, legit slammed my fist into his face because of what he was saying about you.”
Benji’s body started to shake with his laughter. “I’m jealous.”
She smiled against his chest. “I just got so mad, and I couldn’t believe the rage that filled me.”
“Probably the same rage that filled me when you wouldn’t tell me what was wrong.”
She chanced a glance at him and he was looking at her, his eyes filled with the hurt she’d caused. “I’m sorry.”
Cupping her face, he smiled before moving his nose with hers. “Forgiven.”
She inhaled and then let it out, shaking her head. “No normal man would stick around for this crazy train.”
“Lucy, I’m not normal, and I love crazy,” he said and she grinned.
That was one of the first things he had ever said to Angie.
“What are we going to do?”
He smiled. “Don’t you worry. I’ve got a plan.”
Melting against his chest, she felt her tears start to fall. “Will we be okay?”
He smiled, his eyes burning into hers. “More than okay. We’re going to be great.”
It was a promise.
One she knew he would keep.
With Angie in the back of the Jeep he had rented when he came to Florida a few days before, Benji was all smiles as he drove to his destination. The sun was shining, the clouds were fluffy, the sky was blue, and Benji felt fucking good. The happiest and the most relaxed he had felt in years. After telling Lucy everything that Mark had told him, she’d finally smiled. He knew the stress she was feeling was gone, and she was ready to fight. He just wished she had done all that before. He wished she’d come to him, but that woman never did anything easy. She always wanted to do things the hard way, but even she knew that had to change.
She needed him as much as he needed her.
“Not this man.”
“But your career—”
“Is nothing without you,” he stressed as a tear rolled down her cheek. “You give me purpose, Lucy. You make me excited to live. And why have a job that, yeah, I love, if I can’t come home and share my accomplishments with you? And that house isn’t a home without you and Angie. You two made that place so full of life. You think I can go back without you? Just because some dude is threatening us with what your dad says is a bogus video? I don’t care about Rick and his lies, I care about you. About us.”
Closing her eyes as his nose touched hers, she shook her head. She had known he was going to be like this. So fearless, impatient to take Rick out. “He could ruin you.”
“I don’t care,” he said simply. “I’d rather lose all that other stuff and still have you and Angie. Because with you two, I have it all.” Her lips trembled as she held his eyes. “I understand it. The love you have for me and wanting to protect me. Believe me, I’d do the same for you, but instead of doing it all alone, let me help. Let me be there with you. Let’s be there for each other.”
Biting into her lip, she slid her hands across his bare back, pressing her lips to the middle of his chest. His skin broke out in gooseflesh and she closed her eyes, knowing she couldn’t leave him if she tried. Well, she had tried, and look at how that turned out.
“What have I told you from the beginning, Lucy?
She opened her eyes, looking up at him. His eyes had so much love, so much meaning, and she knew what he was talking about. “That you’re not going anywhere.”
“Exactly. So do me a favor and make the same promise. If you want to, that is,” he added and she just stared at him. Of course, she wanted this. Him. She was just scared.
“I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t break up with you. When I got here, I thought I would figure it out. And, yeah, it’s only been a day, but all I wanted was you—to call you and tell you so that we could figure it out. I shouldn’t have run from you, but to you.”
He smiled against her lips. “And I would have caught you. I would have hugged you,” he said, wrapping his arms around her, nuzzling his nose into her neck. “And I would have told you I love you, that we’ve got this.”
“I know. I was just so scared.”
“You don’t have to be scared, because I will help fight those demons. Fight Rick. He can’t beat us if we stand together,” he said, pulling back to look at her. “You are my slice of heaven, Lucy, and the thought of not having you is what terrifies me.”
“Me too.”
“So no more disappearing acts, okay?” he said, kissing her nose, and she smiled.
“I can make sure that never happens again.” He smiled back as he dropped his mouth to hers, kissing her ever so slowly, her toes curling in the sand. She had missed him so damn much, and she was pretty sure that his kisses and hugs were what she lived for. As he pulled back, looking down at her, he shook his head. Moving her hand up to his face, she touched him softly, her thumb gliding along his cheek as she held his gaze.
“I’m just so scared, Benji,” she whispered and he kissed her forehead. “I don’t want anything to hurt you. You’ve had enough hurt.”
“The only thing that can hurt me is losing you and Angie. Remember that.”
She smiled, her eyes glossing over. “I hit him. Like, legit slammed my fist into his face because of what he was saying about you.”
Benji’s body started to shake with his laughter. “I’m jealous.”
She smiled against his chest. “I just got so mad, and I couldn’t believe the rage that filled me.”
“Probably the same rage that filled me when you wouldn’t tell me what was wrong.”
She chanced a glance at him and he was looking at her, his eyes filled with the hurt she’d caused. “I’m sorry.”
Cupping her face, he smiled before moving his nose with hers. “Forgiven.”
She inhaled and then let it out, shaking her head. “No normal man would stick around for this crazy train.”
“Lucy, I’m not normal, and I love crazy,” he said and she grinned.
That was one of the first things he had ever said to Angie.
“What are we going to do?”
He smiled. “Don’t you worry. I’ve got a plan.”
Melting against his chest, she felt her tears start to fall. “Will we be okay?”
He smiled, his eyes burning into hers. “More than okay. We’re going to be great.”
It was a promise.
One she knew he would keep.
With Angie in the back of the Jeep he had rented when he came to Florida a few days before, Benji was all smiles as he drove to his destination. The sun was shining, the clouds were fluffy, the sky was blue, and Benji felt fucking good. The happiest and the most relaxed he had felt in years. After telling Lucy everything that Mark had told him, she’d finally smiled. He knew the stress she was feeling was gone, and she was ready to fight. He just wished she had done all that before. He wished she’d come to him, but that woman never did anything easy. She always wanted to do things the hard way, but even she knew that had to change.
She needed him as much as he needed her.