Rushing the Goal
Page 69
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“Another apology. Wow.”
“Shh, take it and run,” she said and he kissed her hard on the cheek.
Holding her close, he kissed her neck and then her jaw once more. “I don’t want you to leave.”
“Me either,” she whispered. “This is nice, and this kind of stuff doesn’t really happen for me.”
“Because you don’t let it and no one ever wants to try to fight you for you.”
Her lips tilted. “So you wanted to fight me for me?”
“Um, yeah, and I still will,” he declared, his arms coming around her belly, hugging her from behind. “As long as you want me to.”
“No one fights for me. I do the fighting.”
He smiled against her cheek. “Well, how about you fight for what you need to fight for, and I’ll fight for you.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I don’t either, I just want to be there for you,” he said honestly and she smiled, her body trembling with happiness.
“Sounds good to me.”
“Good,” he decided, kissing her once more, his hands moving along her stomach. Silently, they relaxed, the water so warm and soothing against her skin. Her eyes fell shut as she cuddled against Benji’s thick, gorgeous body. He was covered in bruises, but it wasn’t a surprise to her. He was a hockey player, a defenseman who blocked a lot of shots. They were kind of sexy. “I have a question.”
Opening her eyes, she said, “Okay?”
“There is a tattoo on the back of your neck. Explain.”
She smiled as he moved her hair off her neck, running his fingers along the ink. “It’s for my family,” she said softly, moving her hands up his thighs. “We all have Sinclair written somewhere on us, I added the peonies to mine along with Angie’s name.”
“It’s beautiful.”
“Thanks,” she said and then she sucked in a deep breath.
She needed to ask about his tattoo, but before she could, he said, “Another question.”
“Inquisitive today,” she teased and he chuckled against her ear.
“Yeah, so River Moore, Baylor’s dad, is not your real dad. But he’s marrying your mom, right?”
Lucy nodded. “Aw, you listen when I bitch.”
“You do it a lot, so yeah,” he teased and she elbowed him in the gut, not hard but he faked hurt anyway. “Meanie.” He didn’t mean it as he chuckled against her cheek. “Anyway, before you beat me up, where is your real dad? Do you know him?”
She paused and leaned her head into his. “Yeah, my mom and dad got divorced about three years ago, give or take.”
“Oh, you never speak of him.”
“’Cause I hate him,” she said simply. “He broke our happy home. My family is so close, all of us. I mean, Jude shits glitter. Everyone knows in seconds, we’re that close.”
He laughed. “Yeah, I can tell.”
“Yeah, well, even though my dad was kind of tough on us, he was our dad and we loved him. But come to find out, he had another life with another woman. Broke my mom’s heart, broke all our hearts. Over the years, he’s just kept on being shitty. Like, he’s never apologized to any of us, and he just keeps causing issues.”
“Wow. That’s sad.”
“Oh, you have no clue. He almost physically fought my three brothers. He stalled on the divorce and cut my mom off financially when she was stay-at-home mom, so she had to go back to work. He refused to let the boys get access to their trust funds to help our mom. Then he tried to buy Jayden back, but Jayden hates him the most, so there was no help there. But Jace, he just wants to be loved, you know? He wants his whole family together, and my dad tried to buy him to keep him from all of us because Jace was in a bind with his wife and they were pregnant. It was a mess.” She inhaled deeply. “Wow, I really went off there. Sorry. Gosh.”
What in the hell? She never did that. Never talked about her dad.
All of a sudden, she had diarrhea of the mouth.
This guy… Man…
“No, I want to know. I’m sorry that happened, baby. That blows.”
“Yeah, he’s a dick, which is why I don’t talk about him. It just sucks ’cause Angie loves him so much, and he’s always been good to her. But I can’t do it. Sometimes I feel like such a piece of shit for not allowing him time with her, but I’m still so mad at him.”
“Has he tried to see her?”
“Once or twice, but I can’t, and I know that makes me a shitty person.”
But Benji shook his head. “You know what’s best for your daughter. You’re her mother, Lucy. You have to trust your gut.”
“Yeah, exactly,” she said, turning to look at him. “Like, what if he tries to buy her off? She’s young and impressionable, and fucking Rick already does enough of that. So, no, I can’t do it.”
“And you shouldn’t have to. Come here, it’s okay,” he said, cuddling her in his arms. “You need a hug, you’re all riled up. Sorry I asked,” he murmured against her cheek.
“No, it’s fine. He just bugs me.”
“Understandable.”
For a moment, she thought she’d said too much, but then, wasn’t that what a relationship was? Talking about stuff you didn’t like? And Benji did it wonderfully. He listened like he always did and it was nice. Really nice. Leaning into him, she closed her eyes, feeling completely content. Something she hadn’t felt a lot unless she was with him. That should be a blinking sign in her face that he was becoming more, but she had her blinders on because she liked the way he felt. Was that such a bad thing?
“Shh, take it and run,” she said and he kissed her hard on the cheek.
Holding her close, he kissed her neck and then her jaw once more. “I don’t want you to leave.”
“Me either,” she whispered. “This is nice, and this kind of stuff doesn’t really happen for me.”
“Because you don’t let it and no one ever wants to try to fight you for you.”
Her lips tilted. “So you wanted to fight me for me?”
“Um, yeah, and I still will,” he declared, his arms coming around her belly, hugging her from behind. “As long as you want me to.”
“No one fights for me. I do the fighting.”
He smiled against her cheek. “Well, how about you fight for what you need to fight for, and I’ll fight for you.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I don’t either, I just want to be there for you,” he said honestly and she smiled, her body trembling with happiness.
“Sounds good to me.”
“Good,” he decided, kissing her once more, his hands moving along her stomach. Silently, they relaxed, the water so warm and soothing against her skin. Her eyes fell shut as she cuddled against Benji’s thick, gorgeous body. He was covered in bruises, but it wasn’t a surprise to her. He was a hockey player, a defenseman who blocked a lot of shots. They were kind of sexy. “I have a question.”
Opening her eyes, she said, “Okay?”
“There is a tattoo on the back of your neck. Explain.”
She smiled as he moved her hair off her neck, running his fingers along the ink. “It’s for my family,” she said softly, moving her hands up his thighs. “We all have Sinclair written somewhere on us, I added the peonies to mine along with Angie’s name.”
“It’s beautiful.”
“Thanks,” she said and then she sucked in a deep breath.
She needed to ask about his tattoo, but before she could, he said, “Another question.”
“Inquisitive today,” she teased and he chuckled against her ear.
“Yeah, so River Moore, Baylor’s dad, is not your real dad. But he’s marrying your mom, right?”
Lucy nodded. “Aw, you listen when I bitch.”
“You do it a lot, so yeah,” he teased and she elbowed him in the gut, not hard but he faked hurt anyway. “Meanie.” He didn’t mean it as he chuckled against her cheek. “Anyway, before you beat me up, where is your real dad? Do you know him?”
She paused and leaned her head into his. “Yeah, my mom and dad got divorced about three years ago, give or take.”
“Oh, you never speak of him.”
“’Cause I hate him,” she said simply. “He broke our happy home. My family is so close, all of us. I mean, Jude shits glitter. Everyone knows in seconds, we’re that close.”
He laughed. “Yeah, I can tell.”
“Yeah, well, even though my dad was kind of tough on us, he was our dad and we loved him. But come to find out, he had another life with another woman. Broke my mom’s heart, broke all our hearts. Over the years, he’s just kept on being shitty. Like, he’s never apologized to any of us, and he just keeps causing issues.”
“Wow. That’s sad.”
“Oh, you have no clue. He almost physically fought my three brothers. He stalled on the divorce and cut my mom off financially when she was stay-at-home mom, so she had to go back to work. He refused to let the boys get access to their trust funds to help our mom. Then he tried to buy Jayden back, but Jayden hates him the most, so there was no help there. But Jace, he just wants to be loved, you know? He wants his whole family together, and my dad tried to buy him to keep him from all of us because Jace was in a bind with his wife and they were pregnant. It was a mess.” She inhaled deeply. “Wow, I really went off there. Sorry. Gosh.”
What in the hell? She never did that. Never talked about her dad.
All of a sudden, she had diarrhea of the mouth.
This guy… Man…
“No, I want to know. I’m sorry that happened, baby. That blows.”
“Yeah, he’s a dick, which is why I don’t talk about him. It just sucks ’cause Angie loves him so much, and he’s always been good to her. But I can’t do it. Sometimes I feel like such a piece of shit for not allowing him time with her, but I’m still so mad at him.”
“Has he tried to see her?”
“Once or twice, but I can’t, and I know that makes me a shitty person.”
But Benji shook his head. “You know what’s best for your daughter. You’re her mother, Lucy. You have to trust your gut.”
“Yeah, exactly,” she said, turning to look at him. “Like, what if he tries to buy her off? She’s young and impressionable, and fucking Rick already does enough of that. So, no, I can’t do it.”
“And you shouldn’t have to. Come here, it’s okay,” he said, cuddling her in his arms. “You need a hug, you’re all riled up. Sorry I asked,” he murmured against her cheek.
“No, it’s fine. He just bugs me.”
“Understandable.”
For a moment, she thought she’d said too much, but then, wasn’t that what a relationship was? Talking about stuff you didn’t like? And Benji did it wonderfully. He listened like he always did and it was nice. Really nice. Leaning into him, she closed her eyes, feeling completely content. Something she hadn’t felt a lot unless she was with him. That should be a blinking sign in her face that he was becoming more, but she had her blinders on because she liked the way he felt. Was that such a bad thing?