He had gained a tiny portion of her trust, and Lily had taken it away much easier than he had earned it. Her trust in him was fragile and until it grew into something stronger, he would remain teetering on the cutting edge of a sword, precariously close to losing her permanently.
Chapter 49
“Today, I just want you to stretch then work on your weight training.”
“Okay.” Lily warmed up then moved over to where the weights sat.
Shade handed her some weights. “From now on, when you feel uncomfortable trying something or you get scared, I want you to say a word that lets me know you’re getting scared and want me to stop.”
“All right. What’s the word?”
“You make one up. That way, you’ll remember it better.”
“Blueberries.”
“Blueberries?”
“Yeah, I like blueberries. Even saying it makes me happy.” She smiled at him.
“Christ.” Shade returned to work on his own weights.
“What’s wrong with blueberries?” Lily asked curiously with innocence shining in her eyes. It made him feel guilty for wanting to fuck her.
“Nothing,” Shade stated, his jaw clenched. Other than it’s a word a kid would use.
Why couldn’t she have picked a word which reminded him she was a grown woman? Red would have been good. He would have even taken strawberry. He could have worked with strawberry; it was sexy. Blueberries reminded him of when his dad would take him to pick them in the summer, making him imagine Lily picking them. It was a boner-kill. The more he thought about it, blueberries was the perfect safe word for her.
“Then why are you frowning?”
“I don’t know. Most women would pick a color or an object, not a fruit.”
Lily continued lifting her weights. “I can pick a color. I like pink.”
“Lily, blueberries is fine,” he snapped. It went from bad to worse. He would have seriously doubted Lily’s maturity if he wasn’t staring at her breasts as she lifted the weights.
“Why are you getting angry?”
“I’m not getting mad; you’re just distracting me.”
“Oh.” Lily lifted the weight again. “I like baby blue.”
Shade stopped and glared at her. “If you don’t quit bugging me, you’re going to be using your safe word in the next sixty seconds.” He was going to prove to himself she wasn’t a kid if she didn’t shut up.
She did, though.
“You finish up while I get showered and changed,” Shade told her after he was done with his workout, going to his room.
He took a shower long enough to remind his hard cock it wouldn’t be getting any for a while before getting dressed in faded jeans, boots, and a black T-shirt with his dark hair still wet. After he went to the closet he had placed Lily’s clothes in, laying his choice on the bed, he returned to the gym to find her still cooling down.
“Get showered. I laid out another outfit for you.”
She threw him an angry glance over her shoulder as she left the room to go take her shower. Shade couldn’t have cared less. He wasn’t going to see her in another black dress which was not only three sizes to large, but represented the death of her friendship to him.
She was brushing her hair when he went to see if she was ready.
“Dinner’s ready,” Shade said. “Let’s go.”
“We’re going out to eat?” Lily asked with hopefulness in her voice.
“No. We’re eating upstairs like everyone else.” He dashed any hope she was building to return to her house.
“But I’m not allowed upstairs,” Lily argued, trying to pull away from him as he took her hand, leading her to the steps.
Shade stopped and looked down at her. “If you’re going to get used to living here, that means you get used to going upstairs. You don’t want to stay down here all the time, do you?”
“No, but I don’t want to go up there, either,” Lily insisted, her eyes wide.
Shade’s mouth tightened into a grim line. Did she really think he would let her walk into the same situation she had before? The members were going to be themselves within reason until she could cope with more.
“Come on.”
Lily tried to pull away again, her hand going to the rubber band on her wrist.
“Remember our deal,” Shade warned.
“I already told you, I don’t want to go up there.”
“Lily, the club isn’t going to hide itself from you anymore. That cat’s already out of the bag. At first, you’ll be uncomfortable, but then you’ll become familiar with how things work around here.”
Dinner turned out pretty well, considering Lily’s initial hesitations. It took her a few minutes to warm up to everyone, acting like she was meeting them for the first time. However, she came out of her shell when she asked Rider about giving Killyama a ride yet.
Rider’s previously amused expression disappeared. “Not yet. I’ve been busy.”
“Pussy,” Train goaded.
Rider’s hand clenched on his fork. “That woman probably expects me to ride bitch,” Rider made excuses for himself.
“If the panties fit, wear them,” Train said, dodging the fork Rider threw across the table.
“I like Killyama,” Lily said, cutting into her pork roast. The men stared at her in silence. “She saved my life, and I heard Star’s mother had to have plastic surgery after she got in a fight with her. I can see where she might be too much for you.”
Everyone at the table burst into laughter.
Rider turned to Shade. “Set it up,” he ordered, all humor gone.
“Will do,” Shade replied, keeping a straight face.
“Make sure you take protection,” Train goaded.
“Which one are you talking about? Condoms or my gun?” Rider asked.
“Both,” Train said truthfully.
Lily threw Train a reproving look. “I think you should volunteer to give Crazy Bitch a ride, Train. I think you two would have a lot in common.”
Evie put her hand on her mouth while Bliss, sitting next to Lily, asked, “Is she serious?”
“I think so,” Evie said, getting to her feet before she broke into laughter, taking the dirty dishes with her.
After dinner, Lily followed Shade nervously into the other room where everyone was sitting around and talking.
“I thought Beth would have been here by now,” Lily stated when she became aware Train and Cash were pouring drinks at the bar.
“Beth won’t be here tonight. Mrs. Langley had surgery to remove her gall bladder, and she’s staying with her at the hospital,” Evie said, taking a seat across from her.
Lily looked at Shade sharply, which he returned with mock innocence, before her eyes went back to the bar where several members were going back and forth, taking beers.
“But I need to talk to her.” Her voice began to unconsciously rise.
“I’m sure you do, but it’s not going to make a difference,” Shade replied decisively.
Lily’s hand went to her wrist as Viper and Winter came in through the front door. As a breath of relief left Lily, Shade knew Lily thought Winter would be her savior and drive her back to college or drop her off at her house.
Chapter 49
“Today, I just want you to stretch then work on your weight training.”
“Okay.” Lily warmed up then moved over to where the weights sat.
Shade handed her some weights. “From now on, when you feel uncomfortable trying something or you get scared, I want you to say a word that lets me know you’re getting scared and want me to stop.”
“All right. What’s the word?”
“You make one up. That way, you’ll remember it better.”
“Blueberries.”
“Blueberries?”
“Yeah, I like blueberries. Even saying it makes me happy.” She smiled at him.
“Christ.” Shade returned to work on his own weights.
“What’s wrong with blueberries?” Lily asked curiously with innocence shining in her eyes. It made him feel guilty for wanting to fuck her.
“Nothing,” Shade stated, his jaw clenched. Other than it’s a word a kid would use.
Why couldn’t she have picked a word which reminded him she was a grown woman? Red would have been good. He would have even taken strawberry. He could have worked with strawberry; it was sexy. Blueberries reminded him of when his dad would take him to pick them in the summer, making him imagine Lily picking them. It was a boner-kill. The more he thought about it, blueberries was the perfect safe word for her.
“Then why are you frowning?”
“I don’t know. Most women would pick a color or an object, not a fruit.”
Lily continued lifting her weights. “I can pick a color. I like pink.”
“Lily, blueberries is fine,” he snapped. It went from bad to worse. He would have seriously doubted Lily’s maturity if he wasn’t staring at her breasts as she lifted the weights.
“Why are you getting angry?”
“I’m not getting mad; you’re just distracting me.”
“Oh.” Lily lifted the weight again. “I like baby blue.”
Shade stopped and glared at her. “If you don’t quit bugging me, you’re going to be using your safe word in the next sixty seconds.” He was going to prove to himself she wasn’t a kid if she didn’t shut up.
She did, though.
“You finish up while I get showered and changed,” Shade told her after he was done with his workout, going to his room.
He took a shower long enough to remind his hard cock it wouldn’t be getting any for a while before getting dressed in faded jeans, boots, and a black T-shirt with his dark hair still wet. After he went to the closet he had placed Lily’s clothes in, laying his choice on the bed, he returned to the gym to find her still cooling down.
“Get showered. I laid out another outfit for you.”
She threw him an angry glance over her shoulder as she left the room to go take her shower. Shade couldn’t have cared less. He wasn’t going to see her in another black dress which was not only three sizes to large, but represented the death of her friendship to him.
She was brushing her hair when he went to see if she was ready.
“Dinner’s ready,” Shade said. “Let’s go.”
“We’re going out to eat?” Lily asked with hopefulness in her voice.
“No. We’re eating upstairs like everyone else.” He dashed any hope she was building to return to her house.
“But I’m not allowed upstairs,” Lily argued, trying to pull away from him as he took her hand, leading her to the steps.
Shade stopped and looked down at her. “If you’re going to get used to living here, that means you get used to going upstairs. You don’t want to stay down here all the time, do you?”
“No, but I don’t want to go up there, either,” Lily insisted, her eyes wide.
Shade’s mouth tightened into a grim line. Did she really think he would let her walk into the same situation she had before? The members were going to be themselves within reason until she could cope with more.
“Come on.”
Lily tried to pull away again, her hand going to the rubber band on her wrist.
“Remember our deal,” Shade warned.
“I already told you, I don’t want to go up there.”
“Lily, the club isn’t going to hide itself from you anymore. That cat’s already out of the bag. At first, you’ll be uncomfortable, but then you’ll become familiar with how things work around here.”
Dinner turned out pretty well, considering Lily’s initial hesitations. It took her a few minutes to warm up to everyone, acting like she was meeting them for the first time. However, she came out of her shell when she asked Rider about giving Killyama a ride yet.
Rider’s previously amused expression disappeared. “Not yet. I’ve been busy.”
“Pussy,” Train goaded.
Rider’s hand clenched on his fork. “That woman probably expects me to ride bitch,” Rider made excuses for himself.
“If the panties fit, wear them,” Train said, dodging the fork Rider threw across the table.
“I like Killyama,” Lily said, cutting into her pork roast. The men stared at her in silence. “She saved my life, and I heard Star’s mother had to have plastic surgery after she got in a fight with her. I can see where she might be too much for you.”
Everyone at the table burst into laughter.
Rider turned to Shade. “Set it up,” he ordered, all humor gone.
“Will do,” Shade replied, keeping a straight face.
“Make sure you take protection,” Train goaded.
“Which one are you talking about? Condoms or my gun?” Rider asked.
“Both,” Train said truthfully.
Lily threw Train a reproving look. “I think you should volunteer to give Crazy Bitch a ride, Train. I think you two would have a lot in common.”
Evie put her hand on her mouth while Bliss, sitting next to Lily, asked, “Is she serious?”
“I think so,” Evie said, getting to her feet before she broke into laughter, taking the dirty dishes with her.
After dinner, Lily followed Shade nervously into the other room where everyone was sitting around and talking.
“I thought Beth would have been here by now,” Lily stated when she became aware Train and Cash were pouring drinks at the bar.
“Beth won’t be here tonight. Mrs. Langley had surgery to remove her gall bladder, and she’s staying with her at the hospital,” Evie said, taking a seat across from her.
Lily looked at Shade sharply, which he returned with mock innocence, before her eyes went back to the bar where several members were going back and forth, taking beers.
“But I need to talk to her.” Her voice began to unconsciously rise.
“I’m sure you do, but it’s not going to make a difference,” Shade replied decisively.
Lily’s hand went to her wrist as Viper and Winter came in through the front door. As a breath of relief left Lily, Shade knew Lily thought Winter would be her savior and drive her back to college or drop her off at her house.
