Shopaholic & Baby
Page 83

 Sophie Kinsella

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Exactly.
We head toward the vast doors along with all the other couples, and as we enter, I can’t help feeling a little glow of pleasure. Here we are, choosing prams together. Just like I always imagined!
“So!” I beam up at Luke. “What do you think? Where shall we start?”
“Jesus,” Luke says, looking around. It’s a big domed building, with vicious air-conditioning and nursery rhymes playing over the sound system. Colorful ten-foot banners hanging from the rafters read STROLLERS, ALL-TERRAINS, TRAVEL SYSTEMS, TWINS AND MORE.
“What do we need?” Luke rubs his brow. “A pram? A travel system? A buggy?”
“It depends.” I try to sound knowledgeable, but the truth is I’m still foxed by this whole pram and pushchair business. Suze tried to explain the system to me, but it was just like going to press conferences when I was a financial journalist. I glazed over at the pros and cons of swiveling front wheels — and then when she finished I was too embarrassed to admit I hadn’t taken in a word.
“I’ve done some research,” I add, and reach in my bag for my Pram List, which I hand to Luke with pride. Over the last few weeks, every time I’ve seen a cool pram or buggy, I’ve written down its name — and it hasn’t been easy. I had to chase one all the way down High Street Kensington.
Luke is leafing through the pages in disbelief. “Becky, there’s about thirty prams here.”
“Well, that’s the long list! We just need to whittle it down a bit.”
“May I help you?” We both look up to see a guy with a round head and close-cropped hair approaching us. He’s wearing a short-sleeved shirt and a Pram City badge saying My Name Is Stuart, and he’s propelling a purple buggy along with one expert hand.
“We need a pram,” says Luke.
“Ah.” Stuart’s eyes drop to my stomach. “Congratulations! Is this your first visit here?”
“First and only,” says Luke firmly. “Not wishing to be rude, but we’d like to get everything wrapped up in one visit, wouldn’t we, Becky?”
“Absolutely!” I nod.
“Of course. Glenda? Take care of this, please? Back to Section D.” Stuart pushes the purple buggy across the shiny floor to a girl about ten yards away, then turns back to us. “Now, what kind of a pram were you looking for?”
“We’re not quite sure,” I say, glancing at Luke. “I think we need some help.”
“Of course!” Stuart nods. “Step this way.”
He leads us into the center of the Travel Systems area, then stops, like a museum guide.
“Every couple is different,” he says in a singsong voice. “Every baby is unique. So before we go any further, I’d like to ask you a few questions about your lifestyle, the better to steer your choice.” He reaches for a small pad of paper which is attached to his belt by springy wire. “Let’s look at terrain. What will you be requiring of your vehicle? Pavement walking and shopping? Off-road hiking? Extreme mountaineering?”
“All of them,” I say, slightly mesmerized by his voice.
“All of them?” exclaims Luke. “Becky, when do you ever go extreme mountaineering?”
“I might!” I retort. “I might take it up as a hobby!” I have an image of myself lightly pushing a pram up the foothills of Everest while the baby goos happily up at me. “I don’t think we should rule anything out at this stage.”
“Uh-huh.” Stuart is scribbling some notes. “Now, will you require the pram to fold down quickly and easily for car use? Will you want it to convert to a car seat? Will you be looking for something light and maneuverable or sturdy and secure?”
I glance at Luke. He looks as flummoxed as I feel.
Stuart relents. “Let’s look at some models. That’ll get you started.”
Half an hour later, my head is spinning. We’ve looked at prams that turn into car seats, pushchairs that fold up with hydraulic action, buggies with bicycle wheels, prams with special-sprung German mattresses, and an amazing contraption that keeps the baby out of pollution and is “ideal for shopping and lattes.” (I love that one.) We’ve looked at foot muffs, raincovers, changing bags, and canopies.
To be honest, I’m ready for a latte now myself, but Luke is still totally engrossed. He’s poring over the framework of a pushchair with the hugest, most rugged wheels I’ve ever seen. It’s upholstered in khaki camouflage and looks like a great big Action Man toy.
“So, it has an articulated chassis,” he’s saying with interest. “How does that affect the turning circle?”