Some like It Wild
Page 20
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“No, sir.”
“It was only something you experienced directly following the bite?”
“Yes, sir. I, um, I . . .” I feel my cheeks sting. I already feel stupid for what I’m about to say. “I get that way sometimes at the sight of blood. Especially my own.”
He smiles kindly. “That’s nothing to be embarrassed about. And it was a traumatic experience, which only heightens your senses. But it’s a good sign that you’re not feeling poorly anymore. If you’d been more heavily envenomated, you’d be experiencing nausea and vomiting now, along with a variety of other side effects of a copperhead bite. What I believe is that you’ll have some local reaction like pain and swelling, possibly some bruising, but for the most part few lasting effects or disability in your leg. I think this young man’s quick thinking probably saved you quite a bit of suffering.”
Jake looks unaffected by the doctor’s praise, but he doesn’t look as miserable as he did at the house, either, so I’m sure it’s welcome, whether he’d admit it or not.
“So when can I go home then?”
“Not for a couple of days.” The doctor flips through my chart and glances back down at me. “But I’ll do my best to have you out of here before your birthday.” With a wink and a fatherly pat to my hand, he nods to Jake and then turns to walk out of the room.
“You’ve got a birthday coming up?” Jake asks.
“Yeah. Thursday.”
“Why didn’t you—”
“What on earth is going on here, Laney?”
I feel the blood drain from my face when I hear the booming voice and then see my father appear behind Jake.
“Nothing, Daddy. I’m fine.”
“You’re lying in a hospital bed. You are most certainly not fine.” He comes around and sits on the edge of the bed, taking my hand in his. “What happened, baby girl?”
I see the worry in his eyes, etched on his face. “I went camping and got bitten by a snake.”
He closes his eyes and brings our joined hands to his forehead. He’s silent for the longest time. I know he’s praying. “Thank the Lord you’re okay,” he says finally, opening his eyes to look at me.
“If it hadn’t been for Jake, things might’ve turned out much differently,” I say, hoping Jake’s heroics will help my father to look more favorably upon him.
“Well, who were you camping with?” Daddy asks.
“Jake. That’s what I mean. The doctor says his quick thinking probably saved me a lot of suffering.”
“But isn’t he the reason you’re in this predicament at all?”
“Of course not! My getting bitten has nothing to do with him.” I tug my hand free of my father’s and sit up straighter in the bed. I don’t like feeling as though he has such an advantage over me. He’s lorded over me my whole life, and with him sitting and me half lying, it makes me feel intimidated. And I don’t want to feel intimidated. I want to have the guts to make my father see what I see in Jake. Not what he thinks he knows about him.
“Well, if he hadn’t taken you up in the mountains unsupervised you wouldn’t have been bitten by a snake.”
“Unsupervised? Daddy, I’m an adult. In a few days I’ll be twenty-three years old. I’m long past needing supervision.”
“That may be the case, but if you weren’t up there doing things you weren’t supposed to be doing, maybe this wouldn’t have happened.”
“And how do you know what we were up there doing?”
My temper flares. I can only imagine how Jake must feel, being the object of such harsh judgment and criticism most of his life.
“I’m not stupid, Laney. You think I don’t know what happens when a man and a woman shack up together?”
“It’s not like that, Daddy. Jake let me stay there when I didn’t want to stay with you. If anything, that’s on you for not respecting my decision about Shane.”
“You can’t blame me for loving you and wanting what’s best for you.”
“No, I can’t. And I don’t. But I do blame you for using such underhanded tactics. And for being so domineering. Daddy, you have to butt out of my life and let me make my own decisions. I don’t need you to run my life.”
“It appears that you do. Look what a mess you’ve already made of things.”
“I haven’t made a mess of anything. Things are going along just fine, just the way I want them to.”
“Is this what you want? Is he what you want?”
His question isn’t overtly insulting, but the emphasis he put on the word he makes his opinion of Jake crystal clear. And what’s worse is that, with Jake looking on, I don’t know how to answer that without incriminating myself. But I have to say something.
“What if I said yes? Would you stop?”
“Laney, you can’t expect me to just step aside and watch you ruin your life.”
Jake clears his throat and steps forward. The look on his face is unfathomable. But something in it breaks my heart. And makes me feel panicky. “Mr. Holt, it was nice to see you again, but I’ll be leaving now. I don’t want to upset Laney. She’s been through enough today.”
And with that, he turns and walks away.
The bigger man. And, in this case, the better man.
Tears sting my eyes. “How could you be so cold and mean, Daddy? What happened to the loving man I used to know?”
“I’m still that man, Laney. Can’t you see that I do all this because I love you? Because I want what’s best for you?”
“Don’t you get it, Daddy? He is what’s best for me. I’m in love with him.”
The words slip out before I can stop them. They pour from my heart in anger and frustration, but also in truth. Truth I hadn’t even consciously admitted to myself.
My father leans away as if I slapped him. “Don’t be ridiculous. You are destined to be with Shane. Everyone can see it but you.”
“No, I’m not. And everyone can see that except you.”
TWENTY: Jake
There’s a lot to do around the orchard. Between that and working a few shifts at the fire station, I’m keeping busy. The problem is, none of it is enough to make me stop thinking about this mess with Laney.
I wasn’t ready for it to be over just yet. But it has to be now. As if it weren’t enough to hear how terribly I fit into her perfect life and perfect future (at least in her father’s eyes), fate stepped in and let her get bitten by a snake. Her hospitalization and subsequent inability to continue immediate work on my family’s estate meant that the law office sent someone else to tie it up. Turns out that Laney was finished but for a few minor things that the new guy wrapped up in two days’ time.
I don’t know if she was dragging it out because of me, but if she was, that just means it’s even better that it’s over. At least for her. I’m no good for her. I knew that going in. I thought she did, too.
As for me, I’ll just have to scratch this itch somewhere else. No, I’ve never had a woman get under my skin like this, but as I’ve heard numerous times throughout my life, I’m better off alone. And that means fleeting interludes with women, not real relationships. Nothing lasting. Certainly nothing permanent. And that’s what Laney needs—forever. What she’s ultimately after in life. And I just can’t be that for her. So the best thing I can do is step aside and let someone who can give her that have a chance to do it.
But knowing all this, knowing that it makes the most sense from every perspective, doesn’t make it bother me any less. The fact is, I don’t want to scratch this itch with someone else. I wanted to get it out of my system with Laney. Sort of overdose it. Overdose with her. Flood my body with her until I didn’t crave her anymore.
Damn that woman! What the hell has she done to me?
TWENTY-ONE: Laney
It’s been nearly a week and no Jake. Deep down, I knew—I just knew—that he had feelings for me. I would’ve bet money on it. We had settled into what was very close to a marriage for a while. And he was thriving and happy. Or at least he seemed to be. But evidently I was wrong.
He hasn’t been by to see me in the hospital since that first day, when my father acted so horribly. He hasn’t called. Hasn’t returned any of my calls. He just disappeared. Like he never was.
Only I can’t seem to forget him. I can’t pretend that he never was, because to my heart, he still is.
I lay my cell phone to the side. There’s no point in leaving him any more messages. It’s obvious that he’s done with me. I just need to let it go.
I roll onto my side, willing myself not to cry, not to shed one more tear over him. I hear a throat clear behind me and my heart stutters. But when I turn over, I see Tori standing in the doorway.
“Hey,” I say, unenthused.
My lack of zeal has nothing to do with her. I’m very ready to forgive her and move on. It has everything to do with the fact that she’s not Jake. But she can’t help that. Only Jake can fix that.
“I was going to stay away, but . . .”
She eases into the room, and I scoot into a sitting position in the bed, patting the space beside my legs. She gives me a small smile and comes to sit with me.
“So, how are things with you?” I ask.
Tori tilts her head to the side and gives me a disdainful look. “I’m not here to talk about my boring life. I’m here to visit my best friend who got bitten by a snake in the woods with Jake Theopolis.” Tori’s mouth drops open and her eyes sparkle. “Oh my God, Laney! You always said when you went wild, you’d do it your way. You weren’t kidding.”
I can’t help but laugh. “Where’d you hear about that?”
“Well, your parents could only keep things hush-hush for a while. With you in such a public place as a hospital, there was nothing they could do to keep word from spreading. And spread it did!”
I lay my head back against the pillows and close my eyes. “Great,” I sigh.
“Nah, it’s not that bad. Pretty much everyone sees you as the victim. You know, big bad Jake lures sweet, innocent Laney into a trap.”
“This town . . . Why am I not surprised?”
Tori shrugs and pushes her long hair back over her shoulder. “This is the kind of place that needs a villain. And Jake has always given them one. You know, taking advantage of girls.” She snorts and adds, “As if he’d even have to ask twice.”
I smile but say nothing.
A slow, mischievous grin creeps over Tori’s face. “So, you wouldn’t be willing to throw a girl a bone, would you? Tell me all about it?”
I give her a sad smile. “It’s nothing you’d want to hear about.”
Her eyes get big as saucers. “Are you kidding me? Laney, I’ve wanted to be on that guy’s radar since kindergarten!”
I grin. “You have not.”
She gives me a dubious look. “Laney. Come on. You know I developed early . . .”
She makes a good point. “For you and your hormones, kindergarten is probably right.”
Tori gets a wistful look on her face and stares out into space. “Ahhh, the third grader that woke my sleeping body . . .”
That makes me giggle. “I don’t think even you were quite that bad.”
Tori palms her generous chest and gives them a shake. “I had boobs by the time I was nine. Trust me, everything else was just as early.” Smiling, I just shake my head at her. “So come on. Spill.”
I feel my smile die. What happened between me and Jake wasn’t just a sexy sidetrack in my life. Sharing it with Tori would just make it feel dirty and . . . well . . . just less. “Nah, there’s nothing really to spill.” I fiddle with the edge of the sheet, avoiding her eyes.
I hear her gasp as she grabs my hand and stills it. “You didn’t fall in love with him, did you?”
My eyes sting. Even Tori thinks I made a mistake. Is it so impossible that Jake could ever love someone like me?
It must be.
Tori says nothing for a couple of long minutes, minutes that give me time to collect myself.
“You know, Laney, I was thinking about the stuff with Shane. I hate to even bring it up again, but maybe you should just forget everything I said, forget everything that happened and give the guy another chance. I don’t want for you to miss out on your happy ending because of what I did or what I think. That’s a decision you need to make on your own, without my help and input.”
I growl in frustration. “Not you, too!”
“I’m not saying you should marry the guy or take him back with open arms. I’m just saying that maybe you ought to at least give it one more chance. See how you feel. See how things go. I couldn’t live with myself if I thought I cost you the dream you’ve had since childhood.”
I meet Tori’s bright, sincere blue eyes. People have always said we look a lot alike, only Tori’s more vibrant. I know most meant it with regard to coloring, but I’ve always felt like I pale in comparison to her in every way. Shane choosing a free spirit like her only underscored it.
But now, just because I don’t want to be the sweet goody-goody anymore doesn’t mean I’m cut out to be vibrant like her. Someone who could ever hold the interest of Jake. Maybe I was overreaching by thinking someone like him could settle down with someone like me. Or settle down at all.
“Maybe my dream changed, Tor.”
She gives my hand a squeeze. “Just make sure, Laney. Make sure you’re doing things for the right reasons. Don’t let me sway you. Or your dad. Or anyone else. Do what makes you happy.”
“It was only something you experienced directly following the bite?”
“Yes, sir. I, um, I . . .” I feel my cheeks sting. I already feel stupid for what I’m about to say. “I get that way sometimes at the sight of blood. Especially my own.”
He smiles kindly. “That’s nothing to be embarrassed about. And it was a traumatic experience, which only heightens your senses. But it’s a good sign that you’re not feeling poorly anymore. If you’d been more heavily envenomated, you’d be experiencing nausea and vomiting now, along with a variety of other side effects of a copperhead bite. What I believe is that you’ll have some local reaction like pain and swelling, possibly some bruising, but for the most part few lasting effects or disability in your leg. I think this young man’s quick thinking probably saved you quite a bit of suffering.”
Jake looks unaffected by the doctor’s praise, but he doesn’t look as miserable as he did at the house, either, so I’m sure it’s welcome, whether he’d admit it or not.
“So when can I go home then?”
“Not for a couple of days.” The doctor flips through my chart and glances back down at me. “But I’ll do my best to have you out of here before your birthday.” With a wink and a fatherly pat to my hand, he nods to Jake and then turns to walk out of the room.
“You’ve got a birthday coming up?” Jake asks.
“Yeah. Thursday.”
“Why didn’t you—”
“What on earth is going on here, Laney?”
I feel the blood drain from my face when I hear the booming voice and then see my father appear behind Jake.
“Nothing, Daddy. I’m fine.”
“You’re lying in a hospital bed. You are most certainly not fine.” He comes around and sits on the edge of the bed, taking my hand in his. “What happened, baby girl?”
I see the worry in his eyes, etched on his face. “I went camping and got bitten by a snake.”
He closes his eyes and brings our joined hands to his forehead. He’s silent for the longest time. I know he’s praying. “Thank the Lord you’re okay,” he says finally, opening his eyes to look at me.
“If it hadn’t been for Jake, things might’ve turned out much differently,” I say, hoping Jake’s heroics will help my father to look more favorably upon him.
“Well, who were you camping with?” Daddy asks.
“Jake. That’s what I mean. The doctor says his quick thinking probably saved me a lot of suffering.”
“But isn’t he the reason you’re in this predicament at all?”
“Of course not! My getting bitten has nothing to do with him.” I tug my hand free of my father’s and sit up straighter in the bed. I don’t like feeling as though he has such an advantage over me. He’s lorded over me my whole life, and with him sitting and me half lying, it makes me feel intimidated. And I don’t want to feel intimidated. I want to have the guts to make my father see what I see in Jake. Not what he thinks he knows about him.
“Well, if he hadn’t taken you up in the mountains unsupervised you wouldn’t have been bitten by a snake.”
“Unsupervised? Daddy, I’m an adult. In a few days I’ll be twenty-three years old. I’m long past needing supervision.”
“That may be the case, but if you weren’t up there doing things you weren’t supposed to be doing, maybe this wouldn’t have happened.”
“And how do you know what we were up there doing?”
My temper flares. I can only imagine how Jake must feel, being the object of such harsh judgment and criticism most of his life.
“I’m not stupid, Laney. You think I don’t know what happens when a man and a woman shack up together?”
“It’s not like that, Daddy. Jake let me stay there when I didn’t want to stay with you. If anything, that’s on you for not respecting my decision about Shane.”
“You can’t blame me for loving you and wanting what’s best for you.”
“No, I can’t. And I don’t. But I do blame you for using such underhanded tactics. And for being so domineering. Daddy, you have to butt out of my life and let me make my own decisions. I don’t need you to run my life.”
“It appears that you do. Look what a mess you’ve already made of things.”
“I haven’t made a mess of anything. Things are going along just fine, just the way I want them to.”
“Is this what you want? Is he what you want?”
His question isn’t overtly insulting, but the emphasis he put on the word he makes his opinion of Jake crystal clear. And what’s worse is that, with Jake looking on, I don’t know how to answer that without incriminating myself. But I have to say something.
“What if I said yes? Would you stop?”
“Laney, you can’t expect me to just step aside and watch you ruin your life.”
Jake clears his throat and steps forward. The look on his face is unfathomable. But something in it breaks my heart. And makes me feel panicky. “Mr. Holt, it was nice to see you again, but I’ll be leaving now. I don’t want to upset Laney. She’s been through enough today.”
And with that, he turns and walks away.
The bigger man. And, in this case, the better man.
Tears sting my eyes. “How could you be so cold and mean, Daddy? What happened to the loving man I used to know?”
“I’m still that man, Laney. Can’t you see that I do all this because I love you? Because I want what’s best for you?”
“Don’t you get it, Daddy? He is what’s best for me. I’m in love with him.”
The words slip out before I can stop them. They pour from my heart in anger and frustration, but also in truth. Truth I hadn’t even consciously admitted to myself.
My father leans away as if I slapped him. “Don’t be ridiculous. You are destined to be with Shane. Everyone can see it but you.”
“No, I’m not. And everyone can see that except you.”
TWENTY: Jake
There’s a lot to do around the orchard. Between that and working a few shifts at the fire station, I’m keeping busy. The problem is, none of it is enough to make me stop thinking about this mess with Laney.
I wasn’t ready for it to be over just yet. But it has to be now. As if it weren’t enough to hear how terribly I fit into her perfect life and perfect future (at least in her father’s eyes), fate stepped in and let her get bitten by a snake. Her hospitalization and subsequent inability to continue immediate work on my family’s estate meant that the law office sent someone else to tie it up. Turns out that Laney was finished but for a few minor things that the new guy wrapped up in two days’ time.
I don’t know if she was dragging it out because of me, but if she was, that just means it’s even better that it’s over. At least for her. I’m no good for her. I knew that going in. I thought she did, too.
As for me, I’ll just have to scratch this itch somewhere else. No, I’ve never had a woman get under my skin like this, but as I’ve heard numerous times throughout my life, I’m better off alone. And that means fleeting interludes with women, not real relationships. Nothing lasting. Certainly nothing permanent. And that’s what Laney needs—forever. What she’s ultimately after in life. And I just can’t be that for her. So the best thing I can do is step aside and let someone who can give her that have a chance to do it.
But knowing all this, knowing that it makes the most sense from every perspective, doesn’t make it bother me any less. The fact is, I don’t want to scratch this itch with someone else. I wanted to get it out of my system with Laney. Sort of overdose it. Overdose with her. Flood my body with her until I didn’t crave her anymore.
Damn that woman! What the hell has she done to me?
TWENTY-ONE: Laney
It’s been nearly a week and no Jake. Deep down, I knew—I just knew—that he had feelings for me. I would’ve bet money on it. We had settled into what was very close to a marriage for a while. And he was thriving and happy. Or at least he seemed to be. But evidently I was wrong.
He hasn’t been by to see me in the hospital since that first day, when my father acted so horribly. He hasn’t called. Hasn’t returned any of my calls. He just disappeared. Like he never was.
Only I can’t seem to forget him. I can’t pretend that he never was, because to my heart, he still is.
I lay my cell phone to the side. There’s no point in leaving him any more messages. It’s obvious that he’s done with me. I just need to let it go.
I roll onto my side, willing myself not to cry, not to shed one more tear over him. I hear a throat clear behind me and my heart stutters. But when I turn over, I see Tori standing in the doorway.
“Hey,” I say, unenthused.
My lack of zeal has nothing to do with her. I’m very ready to forgive her and move on. It has everything to do with the fact that she’s not Jake. But she can’t help that. Only Jake can fix that.
“I was going to stay away, but . . .”
She eases into the room, and I scoot into a sitting position in the bed, patting the space beside my legs. She gives me a small smile and comes to sit with me.
“So, how are things with you?” I ask.
Tori tilts her head to the side and gives me a disdainful look. “I’m not here to talk about my boring life. I’m here to visit my best friend who got bitten by a snake in the woods with Jake Theopolis.” Tori’s mouth drops open and her eyes sparkle. “Oh my God, Laney! You always said when you went wild, you’d do it your way. You weren’t kidding.”
I can’t help but laugh. “Where’d you hear about that?”
“Well, your parents could only keep things hush-hush for a while. With you in such a public place as a hospital, there was nothing they could do to keep word from spreading. And spread it did!”
I lay my head back against the pillows and close my eyes. “Great,” I sigh.
“Nah, it’s not that bad. Pretty much everyone sees you as the victim. You know, big bad Jake lures sweet, innocent Laney into a trap.”
“This town . . . Why am I not surprised?”
Tori shrugs and pushes her long hair back over her shoulder. “This is the kind of place that needs a villain. And Jake has always given them one. You know, taking advantage of girls.” She snorts and adds, “As if he’d even have to ask twice.”
I smile but say nothing.
A slow, mischievous grin creeps over Tori’s face. “So, you wouldn’t be willing to throw a girl a bone, would you? Tell me all about it?”
I give her a sad smile. “It’s nothing you’d want to hear about.”
Her eyes get big as saucers. “Are you kidding me? Laney, I’ve wanted to be on that guy’s radar since kindergarten!”
I grin. “You have not.”
She gives me a dubious look. “Laney. Come on. You know I developed early . . .”
She makes a good point. “For you and your hormones, kindergarten is probably right.”
Tori gets a wistful look on her face and stares out into space. “Ahhh, the third grader that woke my sleeping body . . .”
That makes me giggle. “I don’t think even you were quite that bad.”
Tori palms her generous chest and gives them a shake. “I had boobs by the time I was nine. Trust me, everything else was just as early.” Smiling, I just shake my head at her. “So come on. Spill.”
I feel my smile die. What happened between me and Jake wasn’t just a sexy sidetrack in my life. Sharing it with Tori would just make it feel dirty and . . . well . . . just less. “Nah, there’s nothing really to spill.” I fiddle with the edge of the sheet, avoiding her eyes.
I hear her gasp as she grabs my hand and stills it. “You didn’t fall in love with him, did you?”
My eyes sting. Even Tori thinks I made a mistake. Is it so impossible that Jake could ever love someone like me?
It must be.
Tori says nothing for a couple of long minutes, minutes that give me time to collect myself.
“You know, Laney, I was thinking about the stuff with Shane. I hate to even bring it up again, but maybe you should just forget everything I said, forget everything that happened and give the guy another chance. I don’t want for you to miss out on your happy ending because of what I did or what I think. That’s a decision you need to make on your own, without my help and input.”
I growl in frustration. “Not you, too!”
“I’m not saying you should marry the guy or take him back with open arms. I’m just saying that maybe you ought to at least give it one more chance. See how you feel. See how things go. I couldn’t live with myself if I thought I cost you the dream you’ve had since childhood.”
I meet Tori’s bright, sincere blue eyes. People have always said we look a lot alike, only Tori’s more vibrant. I know most meant it with regard to coloring, but I’ve always felt like I pale in comparison to her in every way. Shane choosing a free spirit like her only underscored it.
But now, just because I don’t want to be the sweet goody-goody anymore doesn’t mean I’m cut out to be vibrant like her. Someone who could ever hold the interest of Jake. Maybe I was overreaching by thinking someone like him could settle down with someone like me. Or settle down at all.
“Maybe my dream changed, Tor.”
She gives my hand a squeeze. “Just make sure, Laney. Make sure you’re doing things for the right reasons. Don’t let me sway you. Or your dad. Or anyone else. Do what makes you happy.”