Something Forever
Page 51
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I let out a laugh. “I already knew I couldn’t live without you when you asked me if I was going to stand there and undress the rest of you with my eyes, or if I was going to help you wash off the Chinese food on your sweater.” I paused to let him recall. “I had already undressed you in my mind and we had already f**ked.”
“Holy Jesus, Becca. Be careful what you say. I might just rip off your clothes right on this bridge and let everyone watch us.” Matthew shook his head as if to get rid of the thought. “Here. Let’s do this together.” He showed me the lock again, but this time he pointed out to me the part that had the writing on it.
The lock read:
Becky & Matthew
Forever
After I signed the back, Matthew did the same. “I want ours to be the first one.” Matthew placed it on the gate and locked it. It was an extra large lock that no one could miss from the surrounding ones. “Toss the keys into the river.”
“What? Why? We’ll never be able to open it.” I glanced at the key, wondering where he was going with this.
“Exactly. I never want us to ever have to unlock or break this lock. Throwing the key into the river is symbolic of our love for each other. That whatever we will have to face in the future, we are unbreakable. I picked out the silver because silver stands for forever,” Matthew explained.
“Matthew, it’s perfect.” I wrapped my arms around him and embraced him with all of me. What I really meant to say was that he was perfect. “Seal it with a kiss,” I said. I held out my hand with the key on my palm. After Matthew kissed it, I did the same. With one last look, I tossed it as far as I could.
The old Becca would’ve said no to the proposal, because I would have been insecure and thought he had only done it because I was pregnant, but I knew better now. Matthew had shown me time and time again that he loved me. And no matter what my insecurities were, no matter what my mistakes were, he was in it forever.
Jenna was so relieved to see me home that she decided to spend the night at our place instead of with Max.
“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me you were pregnant. Is that the reason why you happened to have the home pregnancy test?” Jenna shifted on the sofa to face me.
“Yes, but you were going through so much that I didn’t want to add to your stress. Actually, the test came out negative. I took it again after two weeks,” I sighed, and handed her a cup of tea.
“Thanks.” She paused. “What’s going to happen?”
“Matthew and I saw my doctor and he explained all of the possibilities to us. We’re going to pray that the baby will survive in my uterus.” I gazed at my stomach.
“Your health comes first, Becky,” Jenna said, looking concerned.
“I know. Matthew reminds me of that every day. I want this so bad, Jenna. I want to give Matthew a child. A child created by us. If I could just have this one baby, then we can talk about adopting if we want more.”
“When would you know if you’re out of danger?” Jenna asked. She hadn’t taken a sip yet. I didn’t think she was even breathing. She was so focused on me.
“I won’t be in the clear until...the baby is born.”
“Whaaat?”
“I know, I know, but I’ve been okay so far. My kidney function is under control. Things are looking great.”
“Okay, but just make sure to tell your doctor everything.”
“Don’t worry. Matthew is on me twenty-four, seven. He’s going to make an appointment with another doctor to ensure that we have the best care.”
“I’m sure he will.” Jenna finally took a sip. “You’re so lucky. I mean... you never had morning sickness, did you?”
“No, I didn’t. I was lucky in that department, but I’d rather have morning sickness than have a high risk pregnancy.” Jenna became still. I didn’t mean to make that comment. “Jenna, I didn’t mean anything by that. I’m so sorry.”
“Becky. No. You’re right.”
She looked so guilty and it was my fault. My stupid mouth. I tried to lighten the mood. “Are you ready for your wedding next week?”
Jenna inhaled deeply. “Ellen has been wonderful. I don’t think I could have planned everything so fast.” The smile came back on Jenna’s face. “My parents are flying in tomorrow. My mom will be here just in time for the bridal shower. Thanks for arranging it around her schedule.”
“Of course. We can’t leave your mom out. I just feel really bad that we didn’t get to have a bachelorette party for you.”
“First of all, I don’t want to do the Las Vegas thing. I don’t think Max would approve. Second, the wedding came up suddenly. We didn’t have time to plan. I’m just glad you agreed to be my maid of honor and your relationship with Matthew is back on track.”
“Of course, anything for you. How are you feeling?”
“I’m pretty calm right now, but I don’t know how I will be the day of the wedding.”
“Jenna, I’m so happy for you.”
Jenna took another sip and changed the subject. “How about you?”
I swallowed my drink. I was pretty sure I gave her one huge, dorky smile. “Matthew proposed to me.”
“He did?” Jenna’s eyes shifted to my hand, which held no ring, but she still looked excited. “When? How? Oh my God!” Jenna embraced me tightly. When she let go, her eyes were glistening with tears. “I’m so happy for you.”
“Holy Jesus, Becca. Be careful what you say. I might just rip off your clothes right on this bridge and let everyone watch us.” Matthew shook his head as if to get rid of the thought. “Here. Let’s do this together.” He showed me the lock again, but this time he pointed out to me the part that had the writing on it.
The lock read:
Becky & Matthew
Forever
After I signed the back, Matthew did the same. “I want ours to be the first one.” Matthew placed it on the gate and locked it. It was an extra large lock that no one could miss from the surrounding ones. “Toss the keys into the river.”
“What? Why? We’ll never be able to open it.” I glanced at the key, wondering where he was going with this.
“Exactly. I never want us to ever have to unlock or break this lock. Throwing the key into the river is symbolic of our love for each other. That whatever we will have to face in the future, we are unbreakable. I picked out the silver because silver stands for forever,” Matthew explained.
“Matthew, it’s perfect.” I wrapped my arms around him and embraced him with all of me. What I really meant to say was that he was perfect. “Seal it with a kiss,” I said. I held out my hand with the key on my palm. After Matthew kissed it, I did the same. With one last look, I tossed it as far as I could.
The old Becca would’ve said no to the proposal, because I would have been insecure and thought he had only done it because I was pregnant, but I knew better now. Matthew had shown me time and time again that he loved me. And no matter what my insecurities were, no matter what my mistakes were, he was in it forever.
Jenna was so relieved to see me home that she decided to spend the night at our place instead of with Max.
“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me you were pregnant. Is that the reason why you happened to have the home pregnancy test?” Jenna shifted on the sofa to face me.
“Yes, but you were going through so much that I didn’t want to add to your stress. Actually, the test came out negative. I took it again after two weeks,” I sighed, and handed her a cup of tea.
“Thanks.” She paused. “What’s going to happen?”
“Matthew and I saw my doctor and he explained all of the possibilities to us. We’re going to pray that the baby will survive in my uterus.” I gazed at my stomach.
“Your health comes first, Becky,” Jenna said, looking concerned.
“I know. Matthew reminds me of that every day. I want this so bad, Jenna. I want to give Matthew a child. A child created by us. If I could just have this one baby, then we can talk about adopting if we want more.”
“When would you know if you’re out of danger?” Jenna asked. She hadn’t taken a sip yet. I didn’t think she was even breathing. She was so focused on me.
“I won’t be in the clear until...the baby is born.”
“Whaaat?”
“I know, I know, but I’ve been okay so far. My kidney function is under control. Things are looking great.”
“Okay, but just make sure to tell your doctor everything.”
“Don’t worry. Matthew is on me twenty-four, seven. He’s going to make an appointment with another doctor to ensure that we have the best care.”
“I’m sure he will.” Jenna finally took a sip. “You’re so lucky. I mean... you never had morning sickness, did you?”
“No, I didn’t. I was lucky in that department, but I’d rather have morning sickness than have a high risk pregnancy.” Jenna became still. I didn’t mean to make that comment. “Jenna, I didn’t mean anything by that. I’m so sorry.”
“Becky. No. You’re right.”
She looked so guilty and it was my fault. My stupid mouth. I tried to lighten the mood. “Are you ready for your wedding next week?”
Jenna inhaled deeply. “Ellen has been wonderful. I don’t think I could have planned everything so fast.” The smile came back on Jenna’s face. “My parents are flying in tomorrow. My mom will be here just in time for the bridal shower. Thanks for arranging it around her schedule.”
“Of course. We can’t leave your mom out. I just feel really bad that we didn’t get to have a bachelorette party for you.”
“First of all, I don’t want to do the Las Vegas thing. I don’t think Max would approve. Second, the wedding came up suddenly. We didn’t have time to plan. I’m just glad you agreed to be my maid of honor and your relationship with Matthew is back on track.”
“Of course, anything for you. How are you feeling?”
“I’m pretty calm right now, but I don’t know how I will be the day of the wedding.”
“Jenna, I’m so happy for you.”
Jenna took another sip and changed the subject. “How about you?”
I swallowed my drink. I was pretty sure I gave her one huge, dorky smile. “Matthew proposed to me.”
“He did?” Jenna’s eyes shifted to my hand, which held no ring, but she still looked excited. “When? How? Oh my God!” Jenna embraced me tightly. When she let go, her eyes were glistening with tears. “I’m so happy for you.”
