“Stay away from him. Sabrina gets what Sabrina wants. He’s marrying her. Whatever you’ve made yourself believe, whatever he’s told you, you need to understand that this wedding is going to happen.”
“Of course it is.” My stomach flip-flops, though, because his eyes hold a warning. How much of the truth does Connor know? I swallow. “I actually needed to talk to you.”
He cocks his head at me. “About what?”
I take a breath. It’s hard to ask a question when you don’t want to know the answer. “Were you behind the thing with Asia and the baby? Did his dad have you bribe her?”
This time it’s Connor’s steps that falter. “I can’t talk about that, Liz. The less you know, the better.”
“I’m the one who told you her name. It’s my fault, isn’t it?”
He shakes his head and pulls me into an alley, looking over each shoulder before looking back to me. “Don’t do this. You are meddling into matters you should stay far away from. Just stay away from Sam and forget you know anything about Asia.”
He doesn’t just look tired and stressed. He looks scared. “What do you know that you aren’t telling me, Con?”
He shakes his head. “I shouldn’t be here. I’m gonna go.” He turns in the opposite direction. “Take care of yourself, Liz.”
Chapter 19
Liz
One year ago . . .
I hand my niece back to my sister, and the second she leaves my arms, part of me feels empty. The twins are beautiful. I imagined I’d have twins one day. When we were kids, Hanna and I always talked about how we would grow up and buy houses next door to each other, get married at the same time, and get pregnant at the same time. Of course we’d both have twins—we couldn’t imagine it any other way—and we’d raise the four like siblings.
Intellectually, I knew that wasn’t going to be our future. What are the chances of it working out like that, right? But it still hurts, and not because I don’t want Hanna to have everything she has. It’s just that I want to have it too.
For a moment I’m tempted to ask for Sophie back. Since there are two of them, it would be easy enough to stay at Hanna and Nate’s all night long and always be holding one baby. After the twins were born, I stayed over here for a couple of nights. I would get up with them in the middle of the night, and I would rock one twin while Hanna fed the other. In the darkness, with a warm baby snuggled against my chest, I would imagine they were mine. Sleep deprivation and midnight feedings didn’t seem bad to me. Instead, they seemed like this wild adventure that I wanted desperately.
Hanna holds out her hand so I can inspect her new engagement ring. It glitters in the light, and the sight of it on her finger makes something pull hard in my chest.
“Congratulations.” My throat is thick with my tears. I force in a ragged breath, and then another, but it’s not enough to fill the emptiness inside me. This is my sister. My twin. My other half. And she has a life. She has her babies and now her fiancé. She has her business. It’s as if my life has been paused since we graduated from college, and she’s been carrying on with hers.
“Are you okay?” Hanna bites her lower lip, her brow wrinkling with worry.
“I’m fine. I’m just so happy for you.” I curl my lips and hope it resembles a smile. I won’t ruin this night for her by letting her discover my internal pity party. “Della wanted to meet for drinks at Brady’s tonight. We have some business stuff to discuss. You won’t be upset if I leave, will you?”
“Of course not.” Hanna wraps her arms around me and squeezes tight. “Tell the wench I said hi.”
I feel a little guilty for the lie. But not much. I’d rather lie and get out of here than risk her seeing just how sorry I’m feeling for myself. If Hanna knew how lonely I’ve felt lately, it would steal part of her joy. And she deserves to be happy, more than anyone I know.
I say my goodbyes and head for the door. In the front room, Asher has Maggie against the wall, his hands buried in her hair, his mouth pressed against hers. They’re always like that, even after all this time together. I’m beginning to think they’ll never change, and dang, wouldn’t that be nice?
I sneak past before they can see me and go straight to my car.
When I get to Brady’s, I’m surprised to see the place is pretty quiet. Then again, Sinclair is out for the spring, and business slows down when summer comes.
I sidle up to the bar, and Brady grins at me. “If it isn’t my favorite blonde.”
“And if it isn’t my favorite barkeep.”
He pulls out two shot glasses and fills them both with tequila. I grab one, and he takes the other. “I hear your sister got engaged tonight.”
I cock a brow, then shoot back my tequila before answering. “News travels fast.”
“It’s already up on that new gossip site. The Tattler?”
“Yeah, I’m familiar with it.”
He refills my tequila. “Yeah, I figured I’d be seeing you tonight. And I figured you’d need a drink.”
“I’m that predictable, huh?”
“You’re human. Don’t beat yourself up over it.”
“What’s wrong with me?” I study the amber liquid, frowning. “I’ve never had a serious relationship. I have no prospects on the horizon. And I have no idea what I want to do with my life.”
“Of course it is.” My stomach flip-flops, though, because his eyes hold a warning. How much of the truth does Connor know? I swallow. “I actually needed to talk to you.”
He cocks his head at me. “About what?”
I take a breath. It’s hard to ask a question when you don’t want to know the answer. “Were you behind the thing with Asia and the baby? Did his dad have you bribe her?”
This time it’s Connor’s steps that falter. “I can’t talk about that, Liz. The less you know, the better.”
“I’m the one who told you her name. It’s my fault, isn’t it?”
He shakes his head and pulls me into an alley, looking over each shoulder before looking back to me. “Don’t do this. You are meddling into matters you should stay far away from. Just stay away from Sam and forget you know anything about Asia.”
He doesn’t just look tired and stressed. He looks scared. “What do you know that you aren’t telling me, Con?”
He shakes his head. “I shouldn’t be here. I’m gonna go.” He turns in the opposite direction. “Take care of yourself, Liz.”
Chapter 19
Liz
One year ago . . .
I hand my niece back to my sister, and the second she leaves my arms, part of me feels empty. The twins are beautiful. I imagined I’d have twins one day. When we were kids, Hanna and I always talked about how we would grow up and buy houses next door to each other, get married at the same time, and get pregnant at the same time. Of course we’d both have twins—we couldn’t imagine it any other way—and we’d raise the four like siblings.
Intellectually, I knew that wasn’t going to be our future. What are the chances of it working out like that, right? But it still hurts, and not because I don’t want Hanna to have everything she has. It’s just that I want to have it too.
For a moment I’m tempted to ask for Sophie back. Since there are two of them, it would be easy enough to stay at Hanna and Nate’s all night long and always be holding one baby. After the twins were born, I stayed over here for a couple of nights. I would get up with them in the middle of the night, and I would rock one twin while Hanna fed the other. In the darkness, with a warm baby snuggled against my chest, I would imagine they were mine. Sleep deprivation and midnight feedings didn’t seem bad to me. Instead, they seemed like this wild adventure that I wanted desperately.
Hanna holds out her hand so I can inspect her new engagement ring. It glitters in the light, and the sight of it on her finger makes something pull hard in my chest.
“Congratulations.” My throat is thick with my tears. I force in a ragged breath, and then another, but it’s not enough to fill the emptiness inside me. This is my sister. My twin. My other half. And she has a life. She has her babies and now her fiancé. She has her business. It’s as if my life has been paused since we graduated from college, and she’s been carrying on with hers.
“Are you okay?” Hanna bites her lower lip, her brow wrinkling with worry.
“I’m fine. I’m just so happy for you.” I curl my lips and hope it resembles a smile. I won’t ruin this night for her by letting her discover my internal pity party. “Della wanted to meet for drinks at Brady’s tonight. We have some business stuff to discuss. You won’t be upset if I leave, will you?”
“Of course not.” Hanna wraps her arms around me and squeezes tight. “Tell the wench I said hi.”
I feel a little guilty for the lie. But not much. I’d rather lie and get out of here than risk her seeing just how sorry I’m feeling for myself. If Hanna knew how lonely I’ve felt lately, it would steal part of her joy. And she deserves to be happy, more than anyone I know.
I say my goodbyes and head for the door. In the front room, Asher has Maggie against the wall, his hands buried in her hair, his mouth pressed against hers. They’re always like that, even after all this time together. I’m beginning to think they’ll never change, and dang, wouldn’t that be nice?
I sneak past before they can see me and go straight to my car.
When I get to Brady’s, I’m surprised to see the place is pretty quiet. Then again, Sinclair is out for the spring, and business slows down when summer comes.
I sidle up to the bar, and Brady grins at me. “If it isn’t my favorite blonde.”
“And if it isn’t my favorite barkeep.”
He pulls out two shot glasses and fills them both with tequila. I grab one, and he takes the other. “I hear your sister got engaged tonight.”
I cock a brow, then shoot back my tequila before answering. “News travels fast.”
“It’s already up on that new gossip site. The Tattler?”
“Yeah, I’m familiar with it.”
He refills my tequila. “Yeah, I figured I’d be seeing you tonight. And I figured you’d need a drink.”
“I’m that predictable, huh?”
“You’re human. Don’t beat yourself up over it.”
“What’s wrong with me?” I study the amber liquid, frowning. “I’ve never had a serious relationship. I have no prospects on the horizon. And I have no idea what I want to do with my life.”
