Two weeks passed, and I was still tripping over chairs to grab the phone every time it rang, like now.
This time it was Jay.
“Duuuuude! You’re never gonna friggin’ believe this!” he hollered. I distanced the phone from my ear. “I just got a call from the manager of Lascivious, and they want to buy the rights to two of our songs!”
My stomach did a flip-flop at the mention of the band.
“Wow, Jay, congratulations! That’s awesome!”
I hoped I managed to sound excited, despite the churning inside me.
“You gotta come with me on Thursday, Anna. They’re gonna perform one of them live!”
Big, huge flip-flop. It was a perfect excuse to see Kaidan. But it would do me no good—just the opposite. I didn’t know how to break it to Jay without hurting his feelings.
“Jay,” I began, sitting in a chair and resting my forehead on my palm. “I want to support you. I really do. I’d love to hear your song, but it’s not a good idea for me to go. Kaidan flat-out told me he wanted me to stay away from him.”
“Dude, whatever. You’ll be there for me, not him. You’re my best friend.”
I was torn. It broke my heart to think of not being there for Jay, but Kaidan had made himself clear. Still, I was the worst friend ever.
“Look, Jay, I’m going to be honest with you, even though it’s embarrassing. I’m one step away from stalking him.” My voice shook. “All I do is think of him. If there were no such thing as caller ID, I would call him all day just to listen to him talking on his voice mail. I’m having an extremely difficult time getting over him. If I see him again...”
“Sorry, man. I guess I didn’t think about it that way. It’s cool. I understand.”
His feelings were hurt. I could tell it in his voice, and it made my eyes sting.
“I’m so sorry, Jay. Will you please call me the second you leave the show and tell me everything?” I asked. “I don’t care how late it is. Promise me.”
“All right. Sure.”
The disappointment in his voice tore me up inside. We hung up and I got the itchy-fingered urge to call Kaidan again, this time with the excuse of talking about Jay’s songs. I threw the phone away from me like a poisonous viper, into the chair across the room.
I sat on my bed with the phone on my lap at eleven thirty on Thursday night. I’d warned Patti that Jay would be calling late. When it rang I snatched it up.
“Hello?” I whispered.
“Oh, man, you just missed the best show ever!”
I smiled. At least he didn’t sound upset with me anymore.
“How was your song? Did they do it justice?”
“Dude, I’m not even kidding. It was a million times better than I imagined it!”
I was feeling giddy for him.
“Yeah? That good, huh?”
“Definitely. I can’t wait for you to hear it. Everyone was rockin’ out to it! The whole place. I almost cried like a big... well, like you! Ha, ha. But I didn’t.” He heaved a great big sigh of contentment.
“I’m so happy for you, Jay. You deserve it.” I felt very bad at that moment, regretful that I didn’t go and just hide in a corner at the show or something.
“They’re talking about going to L.A. to make a record in the next year.”
I got quiet. Los Angeles? Would he have to move there? I lay down on my side and pulled my big pillow into a hug, keeping the phone at my ear.
“You still there?” Jay asked.
“I’m still here. Sorry. That’s... great news.”
“Yeah. Hey,” he said, “there’s something else, too. I don’t know. Maybe I shouldn’t tell you.”
Uh-oh.
“Well, you have to tell me now that you brought it up.”
“All right, well. Afterward, backstage, Kaidan was surrounded by all of these girls.” Oh, gosh—gag reflex! “But as soon as he saw me he left ’em all hanging and came straight over. He said he liked the songs, which was cool. Then he asked where you were, and I said you were at home. And he was all, ‘How is she?’ And I was like, ‘Well, she’s been better, man.’ And, I don’t know, it was weird. He wasn’t acting right. He bolted right after that, didn’t even stay to party.” He paused, quiet. “What really happened between you guys?”
I was more confused than ever when I whispered, “I don’t know.”
He asked about me. He didn’t stay to party.
“Maybe he’s just one of those players who won’t let himself get too close to anybody,” Jay theorized.
“Yeah,” I said. “Or maybe he’s got some serious daddy issues.”
Jay laughed at that.
I wished I were joking.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
TEA FOR TWINS
It was our last day shopping for back-to-school stuff and we’d gone to the mall. The sky was overcast, and the cramped parking garage was so dim I had to adjust my sight. I held both the shopping bags while Patti dug around in her purse for the keys. If I hadn’t been using my extended vision, I might not have noticed them standing at the other end of the garage.
Four Neph: two male, two female, each with a small starburst badge. I almost dropped the bags, tightening my grip just in time. Then I casually looked around, pretending not to notice them watching me. I thought of Kaidan’s words the day I’d gone to his house: Neph don’t show up unless they’re looking for trouble.
This time it was Jay.
“Duuuuude! You’re never gonna friggin’ believe this!” he hollered. I distanced the phone from my ear. “I just got a call from the manager of Lascivious, and they want to buy the rights to two of our songs!”
My stomach did a flip-flop at the mention of the band.
“Wow, Jay, congratulations! That’s awesome!”
I hoped I managed to sound excited, despite the churning inside me.
“You gotta come with me on Thursday, Anna. They’re gonna perform one of them live!”
Big, huge flip-flop. It was a perfect excuse to see Kaidan. But it would do me no good—just the opposite. I didn’t know how to break it to Jay without hurting his feelings.
“Jay,” I began, sitting in a chair and resting my forehead on my palm. “I want to support you. I really do. I’d love to hear your song, but it’s not a good idea for me to go. Kaidan flat-out told me he wanted me to stay away from him.”
“Dude, whatever. You’ll be there for me, not him. You’re my best friend.”
I was torn. It broke my heart to think of not being there for Jay, but Kaidan had made himself clear. Still, I was the worst friend ever.
“Look, Jay, I’m going to be honest with you, even though it’s embarrassing. I’m one step away from stalking him.” My voice shook. “All I do is think of him. If there were no such thing as caller ID, I would call him all day just to listen to him talking on his voice mail. I’m having an extremely difficult time getting over him. If I see him again...”
“Sorry, man. I guess I didn’t think about it that way. It’s cool. I understand.”
His feelings were hurt. I could tell it in his voice, and it made my eyes sting.
“I’m so sorry, Jay. Will you please call me the second you leave the show and tell me everything?” I asked. “I don’t care how late it is. Promise me.”
“All right. Sure.”
The disappointment in his voice tore me up inside. We hung up and I got the itchy-fingered urge to call Kaidan again, this time with the excuse of talking about Jay’s songs. I threw the phone away from me like a poisonous viper, into the chair across the room.
I sat on my bed with the phone on my lap at eleven thirty on Thursday night. I’d warned Patti that Jay would be calling late. When it rang I snatched it up.
“Hello?” I whispered.
“Oh, man, you just missed the best show ever!”
I smiled. At least he didn’t sound upset with me anymore.
“How was your song? Did they do it justice?”
“Dude, I’m not even kidding. It was a million times better than I imagined it!”
I was feeling giddy for him.
“Yeah? That good, huh?”
“Definitely. I can’t wait for you to hear it. Everyone was rockin’ out to it! The whole place. I almost cried like a big... well, like you! Ha, ha. But I didn’t.” He heaved a great big sigh of contentment.
“I’m so happy for you, Jay. You deserve it.” I felt very bad at that moment, regretful that I didn’t go and just hide in a corner at the show or something.
“They’re talking about going to L.A. to make a record in the next year.”
I got quiet. Los Angeles? Would he have to move there? I lay down on my side and pulled my big pillow into a hug, keeping the phone at my ear.
“You still there?” Jay asked.
“I’m still here. Sorry. That’s... great news.”
“Yeah. Hey,” he said, “there’s something else, too. I don’t know. Maybe I shouldn’t tell you.”
Uh-oh.
“Well, you have to tell me now that you brought it up.”
“All right, well. Afterward, backstage, Kaidan was surrounded by all of these girls.” Oh, gosh—gag reflex! “But as soon as he saw me he left ’em all hanging and came straight over. He said he liked the songs, which was cool. Then he asked where you were, and I said you were at home. And he was all, ‘How is she?’ And I was like, ‘Well, she’s been better, man.’ And, I don’t know, it was weird. He wasn’t acting right. He bolted right after that, didn’t even stay to party.” He paused, quiet. “What really happened between you guys?”
I was more confused than ever when I whispered, “I don’t know.”
He asked about me. He didn’t stay to party.
“Maybe he’s just one of those players who won’t let himself get too close to anybody,” Jay theorized.
“Yeah,” I said. “Or maybe he’s got some serious daddy issues.”
Jay laughed at that.
I wished I were joking.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
TEA FOR TWINS
It was our last day shopping for back-to-school stuff and we’d gone to the mall. The sky was overcast, and the cramped parking garage was so dim I had to adjust my sight. I held both the shopping bags while Patti dug around in her purse for the keys. If I hadn’t been using my extended vision, I might not have noticed them standing at the other end of the garage.
Four Neph: two male, two female, each with a small starburst badge. I almost dropped the bags, tightening my grip just in time. Then I casually looked around, pretending not to notice them watching me. I thought of Kaidan’s words the day I’d gone to his house: Neph don’t show up unless they’re looking for trouble.
