Stopping dead, I looked back and assured him, “I’m good on my own. I ain’t into all the parties and stuff that you guys are. It just isn’t me. So leave me alone, yeah? I’m good as I am. I’m happy.”
Jake and Ashton turned away without saying anything else, and as they walked to grab their drink, I glanced over at the redhead and felt my face flame with embarrassment, as I caught her still staring at me. My hand tightened on my helmet strap, and I immediately dropped my gaze. Truth was, I didn’t even like her, not like that anyway. I didn’t even know her. I’d never given her a chance to speak to me. I’d run away every time.
She wasn’t the first to pay me attention; in fact, it happened all the time and I hated it. I wasn’t good with words. I wasn’t good with any of the dating crap. I played ball, I studied, and I kept to myself.
That was my life.
And I didn’t want it to change.
“Carillo. You got twenty more sprints, then you can hit the showers,” Coach shouted, as I took my place back on the field. Putting my head down, drawing myself down to focus, I got it done.
Twenty sprints later, I threw a wave to Jake and Ashton who were still hitting their sprints. I made my way inside. I always finished first. Football was my life. It was what I did best. It was the only constant I’d ever had; I could trust football, I could trust the routine.
It never let me down.
It never left.
My cleats tapped on the tile floor of the locker room as I toweled off sweat from my face. I hit the showers, and in less than five minutes under the boiling spray, with only a towel around my waist, I headed into the locker room. I entered the change area, just as a movement caught my eye, right in front of my station.
A girl. A petite, thin girl—scraggly long blond hair sticking out of a pulled up hood; dressed in dirty black jeans, chucks riddled with holes, and a scuffed black leather jacket.
I froze, startled by what the hell a girl was doing in here, in the football locker room. Then my eyes widened when I realized exactly what she was doing. Her left side was to me, her rail thin body showing me most of her back.
Her hands were in my bag.
Instinct kicked in and I stepped forward. “Hey!” I shouted. But the girl didn’t move. I shouted again, my heart beating fast. It seemed like it took her a minute to hear me. She froze, and flashing me a quick glimpse of her shocked dirty face hidden under her black hood, she pulled something to her chest and sprinted out of the locker room, then straight outside.
I stood rooted to the spot, completely shocked, until I remembered that my bag was wide open. I rushed forward and looked inside. At first I didn’t think anything had been taken, then I noticed my wallet was missing from the inside pocket. I began throwing my clothes and sports crap out onto the floor, searching the entire bag. But as I reached inside the hidden compartment, there was nothing.
Nothing.
She’d taken my wallet.
Great!
Standing straight, I ran my hands through my wet hair. My eyes darted around the room. I questioned how the hell she’d gotten in here? In a secure room?
I breathed out through my nose, trying like hell to calm down, when shards of ice sliced, like spears, down my spine. Every part of me stilled as a further realization kicked in. My wallet. My wallet not only contained all my cards and ID, but also the one thing that mattered the most to me—in my whole life.
The rosary.
My rosary.
My mamma’s rosary!
I shot forward like lightning, dragging my sweatpants and hoodie out of my bag, and threw them on in record time. Without even bothering to put on my chucks, I sprinted out of the locker room and out into the parking lot. My eyes searched all around for the blonde, but she was nowhere in sight. My eyes traveled over the mass of cars, the sidewalks and the surrounding buildings, but she’d gone.
The cold wind wrapped around me and I stood with my hands on my head. My stomach sank into a huge pit when I thought of having those beads taken from me.
I needed them.
I Goddamn needed them.
My jaw clenched as I fought back a loud frustrated scream, then I saw other students hanging about, all staring at me as I stood in bare feet, my hair dripping wet and my hands upon my head.
Feeling a huge surge of embarrassment, I forced myself to turn, to go back into the change rooms, when someone stepped in my path.
My stomach sank further still.
It was the redheaded cheerleader.
The girl smiled and my eyes instinctively dropped to the ground, refusing any contact. I could feel my cheeks heat with redness. I tucked my hands into my pockets, and hell, I had no idea what to do next.
“Levi?” My body tensed as she spoke my name. My heart fired off like a damn cannon and I shifted on my feet. I still didn’t raise my eyes, and I heard a small laugh slip from her throat. “I’m Harper. We’ve never been properly introduced.”
Taking a deep breath, I flicked my eyes to hers, but as soon as I saw her watching me with a smile, another rush of embarrassment hit.
I was no good at this type of thing.
I couldn’t talk to girls.
I couldn’t function around them, something inside stealing all my confidence every time—not that I had much to begin with.
“Are you ever going look at me, Levi? Ever going to talk to me?”
I sucked in a deep breath as Harper moved closer to me, and eventually, I lifted my head. I knew my cheeks were hot with embarrassment. I was sure they were about to set on fire when I watched her smile as I peered up through the strands of my hair that had fallen over my eyes.
Harper was pretty. She wasn’t exactly my type, not that I really had a type. I mean, surely a type meant you actually dated girls. I never did. I just knew she wasn’t really what I’d go for if I was to ever ask anyone out.
When I caught Harper’s eyes, she laughed again. “That’s better. Now I can see those pretty gray eyes of yours. Such a rare color.”
I glanced away, when Harper laid a hand on my arm. My head snapped back, and she asked, “You going to the guys’ party this weekend?”
I shook my head. Harper’s face fell.
“Why not? Everyone will be there. The whole team is going.” She paused. “I’ll be there. I was hoping you’d be there too.”
“I…” I cleared my throat, forcing my mouth to move, pushing my lost voice to make sound. “I c-can’t,” I embarrassingly stuttered out.
Dropping my head, I sucked in the corner of my bottom lip. It was instinctive, an innate sign that I was pussying out. It was my damn tell that I was uncomfortable. Hell, that I was standing here dying.
Harper’s hand tightened on my arm, pulling my attention back to her. I wanted nothing more than to get away from this train wreck of a situation. “I hope you’ll change your mind, Levi. I find myself wanting to know you. Know what’s going on in that shy and mysterious mind of yours. You’re an enigma to me. To all of the girls here.”
Seconds passed in strained silence as she waited for me to say something in response. But I had nothing at all to say. I wasn’t mysterious, nor was I an enigma; I was crippled with nerves.
Without looking Harper in the eyes, I curtly nodded my head as a goodbye, and headed back into the locker room. I felt her watching me all the way to the door, but I never looked back.
Jake and Ashton turned away without saying anything else, and as they walked to grab their drink, I glanced over at the redhead and felt my face flame with embarrassment, as I caught her still staring at me. My hand tightened on my helmet strap, and I immediately dropped my gaze. Truth was, I didn’t even like her, not like that anyway. I didn’t even know her. I’d never given her a chance to speak to me. I’d run away every time.
She wasn’t the first to pay me attention; in fact, it happened all the time and I hated it. I wasn’t good with words. I wasn’t good with any of the dating crap. I played ball, I studied, and I kept to myself.
That was my life.
And I didn’t want it to change.
“Carillo. You got twenty more sprints, then you can hit the showers,” Coach shouted, as I took my place back on the field. Putting my head down, drawing myself down to focus, I got it done.
Twenty sprints later, I threw a wave to Jake and Ashton who were still hitting their sprints. I made my way inside. I always finished first. Football was my life. It was what I did best. It was the only constant I’d ever had; I could trust football, I could trust the routine.
It never let me down.
It never left.
My cleats tapped on the tile floor of the locker room as I toweled off sweat from my face. I hit the showers, and in less than five minutes under the boiling spray, with only a towel around my waist, I headed into the locker room. I entered the change area, just as a movement caught my eye, right in front of my station.
A girl. A petite, thin girl—scraggly long blond hair sticking out of a pulled up hood; dressed in dirty black jeans, chucks riddled with holes, and a scuffed black leather jacket.
I froze, startled by what the hell a girl was doing in here, in the football locker room. Then my eyes widened when I realized exactly what she was doing. Her left side was to me, her rail thin body showing me most of her back.
Her hands were in my bag.
Instinct kicked in and I stepped forward. “Hey!” I shouted. But the girl didn’t move. I shouted again, my heart beating fast. It seemed like it took her a minute to hear me. She froze, and flashing me a quick glimpse of her shocked dirty face hidden under her black hood, she pulled something to her chest and sprinted out of the locker room, then straight outside.
I stood rooted to the spot, completely shocked, until I remembered that my bag was wide open. I rushed forward and looked inside. At first I didn’t think anything had been taken, then I noticed my wallet was missing from the inside pocket. I began throwing my clothes and sports crap out onto the floor, searching the entire bag. But as I reached inside the hidden compartment, there was nothing.
Nothing.
She’d taken my wallet.
Great!
Standing straight, I ran my hands through my wet hair. My eyes darted around the room. I questioned how the hell she’d gotten in here? In a secure room?
I breathed out through my nose, trying like hell to calm down, when shards of ice sliced, like spears, down my spine. Every part of me stilled as a further realization kicked in. My wallet. My wallet not only contained all my cards and ID, but also the one thing that mattered the most to me—in my whole life.
The rosary.
My rosary.
My mamma’s rosary!
I shot forward like lightning, dragging my sweatpants and hoodie out of my bag, and threw them on in record time. Without even bothering to put on my chucks, I sprinted out of the locker room and out into the parking lot. My eyes searched all around for the blonde, but she was nowhere in sight. My eyes traveled over the mass of cars, the sidewalks and the surrounding buildings, but she’d gone.
The cold wind wrapped around me and I stood with my hands on my head. My stomach sank into a huge pit when I thought of having those beads taken from me.
I needed them.
I Goddamn needed them.
My jaw clenched as I fought back a loud frustrated scream, then I saw other students hanging about, all staring at me as I stood in bare feet, my hair dripping wet and my hands upon my head.
Feeling a huge surge of embarrassment, I forced myself to turn, to go back into the change rooms, when someone stepped in my path.
My stomach sank further still.
It was the redheaded cheerleader.
The girl smiled and my eyes instinctively dropped to the ground, refusing any contact. I could feel my cheeks heat with redness. I tucked my hands into my pockets, and hell, I had no idea what to do next.
“Levi?” My body tensed as she spoke my name. My heart fired off like a damn cannon and I shifted on my feet. I still didn’t raise my eyes, and I heard a small laugh slip from her throat. “I’m Harper. We’ve never been properly introduced.”
Taking a deep breath, I flicked my eyes to hers, but as soon as I saw her watching me with a smile, another rush of embarrassment hit.
I was no good at this type of thing.
I couldn’t talk to girls.
I couldn’t function around them, something inside stealing all my confidence every time—not that I had much to begin with.
“Are you ever going look at me, Levi? Ever going to talk to me?”
I sucked in a deep breath as Harper moved closer to me, and eventually, I lifted my head. I knew my cheeks were hot with embarrassment. I was sure they were about to set on fire when I watched her smile as I peered up through the strands of my hair that had fallen over my eyes.
Harper was pretty. She wasn’t exactly my type, not that I really had a type. I mean, surely a type meant you actually dated girls. I never did. I just knew she wasn’t really what I’d go for if I was to ever ask anyone out.
When I caught Harper’s eyes, she laughed again. “That’s better. Now I can see those pretty gray eyes of yours. Such a rare color.”
I glanced away, when Harper laid a hand on my arm. My head snapped back, and she asked, “You going to the guys’ party this weekend?”
I shook my head. Harper’s face fell.
“Why not? Everyone will be there. The whole team is going.” She paused. “I’ll be there. I was hoping you’d be there too.”
“I…” I cleared my throat, forcing my mouth to move, pushing my lost voice to make sound. “I c-can’t,” I embarrassingly stuttered out.
Dropping my head, I sucked in the corner of my bottom lip. It was instinctive, an innate sign that I was pussying out. It was my damn tell that I was uncomfortable. Hell, that I was standing here dying.
Harper’s hand tightened on my arm, pulling my attention back to her. I wanted nothing more than to get away from this train wreck of a situation. “I hope you’ll change your mind, Levi. I find myself wanting to know you. Know what’s going on in that shy and mysterious mind of yours. You’re an enigma to me. To all of the girls here.”
Seconds passed in strained silence as she waited for me to say something in response. But I had nothing at all to say. I wasn’t mysterious, nor was I an enigma; I was crippled with nerves.
Without looking Harper in the eyes, I curtly nodded my head as a goodbye, and headed back into the locker room. I felt her watching me all the way to the door, but I never looked back.
