With a flip of a switch, blackness envelops the room and it takes a second for my eyes to readjust. Little lights glimmer from his assorted electronics, and from the glow of the cracked-open bathroom, I can see just enough. West’s feet pad against the carpet back to me. The bed dips and his heat reaches me before his body.
We’re slow in returning to the edginess—the rawness that causes me to forget I’m na**d and West is na**d and that we’re sharing something so intimate, so intense...
West breaks away and mutters a curse. Cold air slaps my body and panic tenses my muscles. I replay the past few seconds, searching for what I did wrong. “What is it?”
He falls back to his pillow and I tuck the sheet over my br**sts. “West?”
“I don’t have a condom.”
I blink. He doesn’t have a... “But I thought all guys...” Guess they don’t.
He rubs his eyes. “I told you. I don’t have sex.”
“Oh.” Giddiness invades my voice. “So you still want me?”
West peers at me out of the corner of his eye and motions downward. “Obviously.”
I nervously giggle, then stop, feeling relieved and somewhat...frustrated. Like waking up from a dream of kissing West and not finding him in my bed. “I won’t do it without one.”
“Neither will I.” He rolls to a sitting position and grabs his jeans. “Then we’ll get one.”
I don’t know why, but that freaks me out. I reach out and snatch his hand. “Stay.”
“But—”
I squeeze his fingers. “Stay. We can do...other...things... Just stay. I don’t want to go to a store and pick it out because then it’s not...the moment...this moment...”
West is silent for a bit, then nods. “Okay.”
I breathe out a sigh. “Okay.”
He slides back beside me and kisses my lips. “But I’m buying some.”
“All right.” I lose my breath again as his hands resume their exploration.
“I mean it,” he says.
“I one hundred percent believe you.” And with a few more touches we become lost.
There’s a building of sensation and all the emotion drives it to an inferno. Our bodies weave into an intricate web and, if given the option, I don’t want to escape. I grab hold tighter and so does West. We gasp and then the entire world fades away, leaving only us.
We collapse into each other; muscles weak and minds drifting. Our arms and legs are tangled and West tucks me into his body. One arm draped protectively over me. My cheek rests against his chest and his heart beats steadily in my ear. I love him. I do.
West kisses the top of my head as his hands trace meaningless patterns on my back. “I love you, Haley,” he whispers. “I love you.”
Chapter 58
West
I stare at the report card I received in first period. No matter how many times I unfold it, the letters never alter: solid Bs. The smile, once again, spreads across my face regardless of the anger that’s been simmering inside me since Saturday night.
The bell rings for lunch and Haley stands. She tosses her light brown hair over her shoulder and, for a few seconds, I’m back in bed with her and I swear I feel that silky hair sliding against my bare chest.
“You’re going to rub the ink off. Then no one’s going to believe you,” she says.
I refold the paper and slip it into my notebook. Haley’s met my demons, grades included, and loves me anyhow. Her arm swings next to mine as we maneuver through the crowded hallway to lunch. I enjoy the satisfied tilt of her lips when my hand connects with hers. It’s Monday. Saturday night changed everything for us—it made us better, made us stronger.
“It’s amazing what happens when you study,” she teases again.
“Or attend class.” This afternoon I’m nailing my report card to the door of Dad’s office.
“I was thinking we should skip lunch today.” Haley flutters her eyelashes and her sexy expression almost blows me off course. Almost.
“I’m hungry.”
She squishes her lips together. “I’ve got some pretzels in my backpack.”
“I’m really hungry.”
Haley stops dead at the entrance of the cafeteria and her grasp tightens. Hoping she’d continue, I walk forward until my arm completely stretches behind me. When I turn, Haley’s lost the cuteness. “Don’t do it, West.”
“Do what?” We both know that in the cafeteria I’m going after Matt hard and fast.
The second I dropped Haley off at the corner near her uncle’s house on Saturday, because we can’t be seen together since his ultimatum, I’ve thought about this moment. The anger has built and stewed and I’m damn ready for it to boil over. Haley won’t give me details, but Matt hit her and I’m done with everyone acting like she’s roadkill, her family included.
“Remember what I said about you leading with your emotions,” she says.
“Yes.”
“Well, this is you doing it.”
“Haley, this is premeditation at its best.”
“It’s not how long you think about it—it’s the emotion. Anger is going to get you nowhere. I take that back. Anger is going to get you killed.” Haley glances around the cafeteria. Sensing the anger pulsating from me, people watch us like bottleneckers with a car wreck.
“I can stop you,” she says simply.
I look deep into her dark eyes and shake my head. “You wouldn’t humiliate me like that.”
“This is insane,” she hisses. “You’ll be lucky to get one punch in before the security guards take you down and the two of you get kicked out of school. Zero tolerance policy, remember? Doesn’t matter who hits first—you both get suspended.”
A wildness inside me creates a grin on my face. “I have a plan.”
“Ah, hell, really?” Haley tosses her backpack to the ground like she’s throwing in the towel. Matt’s gym rules: he can’t train for a week if he gets suspended for fighting at school. “When will you get it through your thick skull that I’m not worth fighting over?”
“Yes, you are. And you know this won’t go to blows. The real fight will be in a few weeks in that cage.”
Haley shifts into shock mode with her paled-out face. “No, West. Don’t you dare challenge him. You have a better chance against Conner.”
“I don’t want to fight Conner. I want Matt and I want him suspended from his gym.”
We’re slow in returning to the edginess—the rawness that causes me to forget I’m na**d and West is na**d and that we’re sharing something so intimate, so intense...
West breaks away and mutters a curse. Cold air slaps my body and panic tenses my muscles. I replay the past few seconds, searching for what I did wrong. “What is it?”
He falls back to his pillow and I tuck the sheet over my br**sts. “West?”
“I don’t have a condom.”
I blink. He doesn’t have a... “But I thought all guys...” Guess they don’t.
He rubs his eyes. “I told you. I don’t have sex.”
“Oh.” Giddiness invades my voice. “So you still want me?”
West peers at me out of the corner of his eye and motions downward. “Obviously.”
I nervously giggle, then stop, feeling relieved and somewhat...frustrated. Like waking up from a dream of kissing West and not finding him in my bed. “I won’t do it without one.”
“Neither will I.” He rolls to a sitting position and grabs his jeans. “Then we’ll get one.”
I don’t know why, but that freaks me out. I reach out and snatch his hand. “Stay.”
“But—”
I squeeze his fingers. “Stay. We can do...other...things... Just stay. I don’t want to go to a store and pick it out because then it’s not...the moment...this moment...”
West is silent for a bit, then nods. “Okay.”
I breathe out a sigh. “Okay.”
He slides back beside me and kisses my lips. “But I’m buying some.”
“All right.” I lose my breath again as his hands resume their exploration.
“I mean it,” he says.
“I one hundred percent believe you.” And with a few more touches we become lost.
There’s a building of sensation and all the emotion drives it to an inferno. Our bodies weave into an intricate web and, if given the option, I don’t want to escape. I grab hold tighter and so does West. We gasp and then the entire world fades away, leaving only us.
We collapse into each other; muscles weak and minds drifting. Our arms and legs are tangled and West tucks me into his body. One arm draped protectively over me. My cheek rests against his chest and his heart beats steadily in my ear. I love him. I do.
West kisses the top of my head as his hands trace meaningless patterns on my back. “I love you, Haley,” he whispers. “I love you.”
Chapter 58
West
I stare at the report card I received in first period. No matter how many times I unfold it, the letters never alter: solid Bs. The smile, once again, spreads across my face regardless of the anger that’s been simmering inside me since Saturday night.
The bell rings for lunch and Haley stands. She tosses her light brown hair over her shoulder and, for a few seconds, I’m back in bed with her and I swear I feel that silky hair sliding against my bare chest.
“You’re going to rub the ink off. Then no one’s going to believe you,” she says.
I refold the paper and slip it into my notebook. Haley’s met my demons, grades included, and loves me anyhow. Her arm swings next to mine as we maneuver through the crowded hallway to lunch. I enjoy the satisfied tilt of her lips when my hand connects with hers. It’s Monday. Saturday night changed everything for us—it made us better, made us stronger.
“It’s amazing what happens when you study,” she teases again.
“Or attend class.” This afternoon I’m nailing my report card to the door of Dad’s office.
“I was thinking we should skip lunch today.” Haley flutters her eyelashes and her sexy expression almost blows me off course. Almost.
“I’m hungry.”
She squishes her lips together. “I’ve got some pretzels in my backpack.”
“I’m really hungry.”
Haley stops dead at the entrance of the cafeteria and her grasp tightens. Hoping she’d continue, I walk forward until my arm completely stretches behind me. When I turn, Haley’s lost the cuteness. “Don’t do it, West.”
“Do what?” We both know that in the cafeteria I’m going after Matt hard and fast.
The second I dropped Haley off at the corner near her uncle’s house on Saturday, because we can’t be seen together since his ultimatum, I’ve thought about this moment. The anger has built and stewed and I’m damn ready for it to boil over. Haley won’t give me details, but Matt hit her and I’m done with everyone acting like she’s roadkill, her family included.
“Remember what I said about you leading with your emotions,” she says.
“Yes.”
“Well, this is you doing it.”
“Haley, this is premeditation at its best.”
“It’s not how long you think about it—it’s the emotion. Anger is going to get you nowhere. I take that back. Anger is going to get you killed.” Haley glances around the cafeteria. Sensing the anger pulsating from me, people watch us like bottleneckers with a car wreck.
“I can stop you,” she says simply.
I look deep into her dark eyes and shake my head. “You wouldn’t humiliate me like that.”
“This is insane,” she hisses. “You’ll be lucky to get one punch in before the security guards take you down and the two of you get kicked out of school. Zero tolerance policy, remember? Doesn’t matter who hits first—you both get suspended.”
A wildness inside me creates a grin on my face. “I have a plan.”
“Ah, hell, really?” Haley tosses her backpack to the ground like she’s throwing in the towel. Matt’s gym rules: he can’t train for a week if he gets suspended for fighting at school. “When will you get it through your thick skull that I’m not worth fighting over?”
“Yes, you are. And you know this won’t go to blows. The real fight will be in a few weeks in that cage.”
Haley shifts into shock mode with her paled-out face. “No, West. Don’t you dare challenge him. You have a better chance against Conner.”
“I don’t want to fight Conner. I want Matt and I want him suspended from his gym.”
