The Best Goodbye
Page 25

“River,” she said, leaning closer toward me.
Breathe. I had to remember to breathe. “Yeah?”
“Why won’t you kiss me?”
I jerked my gaze to lock with hers. “What?”
Her cheeks turned a pretty pink. “Why won’t you kiss me?” she repeated. “I know you like kissing girls, but you haven’t kissed me.”
The crotch of my jeans got extremely tight as I looked down at her innocent, beautiful face asking me to kiss her. Like I was going to turn that down. I wasn’t sure I would be able to stop when it was time and not let my hands go places she wasn’t ready for.
“I was waiting until you were ready,” I told her honestly.
She licked her lips, and the tip of her tongue peeked out, taunting me. “I’m ready.”
This would be her first kiss and my last first kiss. Because once I did this, I’d never touch anyone else again. Just Addy.
Addy
So many times over the past ten years, I had imagined this day. When I would see River again and tell him why I ran away and tell him about Franny. Not once did it play out like this in my imagination. But then, all I’d had was the memory of River. I didn’t know Captain. The man he had become was someone I didn’t much care for.
But he wanted to be part of Franny’s life, and she deserved that. He wasn’t a bad man. He just wasn’t the guy I had known. Then again, I was no longer the girl he had loved. It was hard to face, but now that I had him here as River, not my boss Captain, I had to deal with it.
“Does she know that I’m her father? Or that her father is in this town?” he asked, watching me closely, as if he was trying to determine if I was lying.
I shook my head. “She has no idea. Like I said, I needed to see who you were now before I told her.” He didn’t like it when I said that. I could tell by the way his eyes tightened, but I wasn’t here to make friends with him. Franny came first. He needed to get that.
“When can we tell her?”
I liked that he said “we,” as if he was ready to take a real role in her life. However, I was used to being the only decision maker in her life, and a part of me wasn’t ready to share. “I can sit her down tonight, but I need to do that alone. Once she understands why I brought her here and wanted to wait to introduce her to you, then we can meet together. The three of us.”
He nodded. I was glad he didn’t argue.
We sat there in silence, not looking at each other. There was a gulf between us that I had never imagined would ever exist. He’d been my soul mate, my best friend, and I’d carried that memory of him with me all these years. It hurt simply because I knew I needed to let go of that.
Looking up from my hands, I asked him, “Why couldn’t I find you, and why did you change your name?” I’d told him everything, yet he had given me nothing.
“Dad divorced Mom when she was committed, and then he married Carlotta, the secretary. I ran. Left town and didn’t look back. Met a man who gave me a job and an escape. A way to deal with my demons.”
That was it? He wasn’t telling me anything more than that? “What did you do? Did you change your name because you ran?”
He shook his head and stood up. “I changed it because I wanted to forget what River Kipling had suffered. I wanted to start a life where that past could be forgotten.” That was it. All he was going to say. Reaching out his hand, he said, “Give me your phone. I’ll put my number in it.”
I didn’t question him. I did as he asked. He quickly added his number to my contacts and handed the phone back to me.
Standing, I waited for more, but he turned and headed for the door. I watched him until he stopped and turned to look back at me. “I’m not accepting your resignation letter. I was an ass the other night. I won’t be again. It was a stressful night, and Brad deserved that correction, not you. I’ll see you tomorrow evening for work. And talk to Franny. I’ve already lost enough time with her. Call me as soon as she’s ready.”
Then he opened the door and walked out without waiting for me to respond.
I had never imagined this was how tonight would end.
I walked over to the window to watch Captain get into his truck and drive away. Once he was gone, I made my way outside to get Franny from Mrs. Baylor’s.
I planned to keep Franny home from school the next day. We were going to have all the time she needed to talk about Captain. I knew she’d have questions. I also knew she’d want to meet Captain officially as soon as possible. She’d been waiting a long time to meet her father.
• • •
I started making chocolate-chip pancakes, which were Franny’s favorite, and texted Captain.
I’m talking to Franny today. She’ll want to see you soon. Let me know when you’re available.
It took him only seconds to respond.
I’ll be ready when she is.
This was River. I didn’t have access to him anymore, but maybe, for Franny, he would be the guy I’d once known. The protector who would do or be whatever she needed.
I trusted him. I just hoped I wasn’t wrong.
“Are those chocolate chip?” Franny’s sleepy voice asked. I could sense the excitement in her tone.
“Yes, they are,” I replied, holding up the bag of chips.
“Yay! I’ll pour the milk,” she said, running over to the fridge.
“Good idea. These are almost done.”