The Endless Forest
Page 124

 Sara Donati

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Martha caught Daniel’s eye and he smiled at her, a quiet smile that said she had nothing—they had nothing—to worry about. She belonged here now, and so did Callie. It was a comforting thought, that they were facing this change together, as they had faced so many other, far less pleasant things.
But when she reached out to take Callie’s arm, all she got in return was a sharp look as unforgiving as broken glass.
Chapter XLIII
Sometimes, Elizabeth told herself, it made no sense to even try to sleep. Certainly after a day like this one she found it hard to imagine she might find any rest. It had been so full of emotion, so overwhelming, that it was stuck in her head like a melody.
The house had never seemed so small, though there was no one in attendance but family. It had to do with the little people, of course, who had not yet learned to temper happiness and excitement with common sense. Even Birdie had given in to it, the usual carefully maintained seniority over nephews and nieces left aside.
“It was a good party,” Nathaniel said. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, unlacing his moccasins. When she had no reply he glanced at her and his hair fell over his shoulder, black shot with silver.
She said, “I was thinking of Birdie. It won’t be very long before she leaves us too.”
He leaned over and kissed her. “I don’t know, Boots, but eight, ten years strikes me as a good while before we have to worry about that.”
“It will go by very quickly,” Elizabeth said.
“Only if you let it.”
“And I’m worried about Daniel.”
He stripped off his shirt and slid under the covers. With his head propped up on one hand, he studied her face.
“I cain’t recall the last time I saw him so happy.”
“Oh, I know he’s happy with Martha and she with him. It was a joy to see them together. But he was in pain this afternoon, you must have noticed.”
Nathaniel was quiet for a long moment. This was a conversation they had had many times over the years. She told him about the things that concerned her, and Nathaniel took it all in without providing false comfort.
“I wish he would talk to Hannah about the treatment Hakim Ibrahim has suggested.”
“He’s got other things on his mind just now,” Nathaniel said. He ran a thumb from her throat down between her breasts. She caught his hand and held it to her.
“You’ll forgive me if I don’t care to think much about that.”
He grinned. “I forgive you. With all that worry in your head, you got any room for Ethan?”
Elizabeth closed her eyes in the hope that would keep her husband from reading her thoughts.
“Boots.”
“Hmmm?”
“You’re not worried about Ethan and Callie?”
“How could I be anything else?”
She stayed just as she was while he blew out the candle and then settled down for sleep. For a moment she thought she had evaded the worst, but then he slid an arm around her and pulled her close so he could tuck her head under his chin.
“I’ll tell you what worries me,” he said. “I don’t know if it will help or hurt with Jemima.”
She sighed. “It makes my head spin to think about it. Nathaniel, did they seem happy to you, Ethan and Callie?”
He rubbed his chin against the crown of her head. “Depends on what you mean by happy, I suppose. They just may suit each other in ways that don’t make sense to you and me.”
“That’s a nice thought,” Elizabeth said. And it was enough of a comfort that she could let her worries go, just now. In the sweet dark, tethered to her place in the world by Nathaniel’s voice and the sound of his heartbeat.
Simon said, “You need your sleep, Lily, and so do I.”
He reached beyond her for the candle, and she caught his hand to stop him.
“It’s your own fault,” she said. “You started the conversation. You asked me what I thought.”
He fell back against his pillow and blew a long sigh toward the ceiling.
“God above help me, so I did. All right, then. Now what toll is there to pay before we can sleep?”
Lily still had his hand in hers, and she smoothed it for a moment while she thought.
“You can explain Ethan to me.”
He let out a rough laugh. “Darlin’, I can’t even explain you.”
This surprised her. “There’s nothing complicated about me,” Lily said. “I have everything I want and need, and all my family are settled and happy. Do not make that face, Simon Ballentyne. I am happy for Daniel. I see now that Martha is the right choice.”
“Come out with it, lass, and say it.”
“All right. I was wrong about Martha. And I’m glad that I was wrong. But I am still confused about Ethan and Callie.”
He was silent for a long moment. “Tell me this,” he said finally. “Is there aught we can do but wish them well?”
Lily could think of nothing to say, and so Simon put out the light. She had begun to slide toward sleep when it happened.
“What?” Simon said. “Is there aught amiss?”
“Feel,” she said, and she put his palm on her belly. “As soon as I settle down to sleep, it starts. A tumbling, like a leaf in the wind.”
“Aye, well,” Simon said, rubbing gently. “It’s only when you’re asleep that wee blueberry can get a word in sidewise.”
Hannah came to bed in the last hour of dark, stumbling a little in her exhaustion.