The Endless Forest
Page 136

Her mouth fell open and she closed it with a click. “That could happen again?”
“If we’re lucky and we work at it,” Daniel said, “it should happen pretty much every time.”
Someone had left them blankets for when they finally came out of the water, and someone else—Gabriel or Blue-Jay, most likely—had retrieved their clothes from the cave. But for once Martha was too preoccupied to worry about what others saw or imagined.
While they sat down to eat, all during the long conversation about Johnstown, about Ethan and Callie, Jemima and young Nicholas, about crops, her thoughts kept wandering away and jolting back when someone asked her a question.
She made an effort to answer thoughtfully and then as soon as the discussion moved on, her thoughts slipped away again.
Pretty much every time.
The things she wanted and needed to talk about could not be raised at this table, or at any table she could imagine. Even if her best friends from Manhattan should magically appear, Martha had no idea how she would put such things into words. She would have to talk to Daniel about this, or be content to live in ignorance.
Pretty much every time.
She felt him watching her. She had pleased him, there was no doubt of that, but he also seemed pleased with himself.
“You’re hardly eating,” Gabriel said to her and it was true.
“It’s the heat,” Susanna suggested.
Martha smiled at her in thanks, and Susanna put her hand over Martha’s and squeezed it.
“It’s a grand adventure,” she said quietly. “But ofttimes a disconcerting one.”
The puppy nosed around her ankle and Martha took him onto her lap.
Annie said, “So does he favor Nicholas Wilde? The boy?”
From one uncomfortable conversation to the next.
“To be truthful, I don’t know,” Martha said. “I have a hard time remembering what Mr. Wilde looked like at all. I was no more than Birdie’s age.”
“It’s strange that Jemima waited so long to bring him here to meet his sisters,” Gabriel said.
Susanna had never known Jemima or Nicholas Wilde at all. The others had: Runs-from-Bears, Blue-Jay, Daniel himself; they knew her own story as well as she did. The miraculous thing was, it didn’t seem to matter. She was one of them; it was as if by marrying Daniel she had forsworn the family that went before, and cut her connection to the woman who had borne and raised her.
They had done the same for Susanna when she walked away from her family because they would not or could not come to peace with her decision. Of course, Susanna had left something worthwhile behind, something she must miss every day.
Martha wondered if Susanna was someone she could talk to. If she could be the kind of friend that once Callie had been, someone who understood without a great deal of explanation. There was a calm about her that Martha liked and trusted. She studied Susanna’s profile, the freckled skin, strong nose, wide-set eyes. She had a kind smile and an uncommonly even temper, though she had seemed ready to skin Daniel alive for bringing Martha through the falls.
Every now and then glances passed between Susanna and Blue-Jay, as they passed between Annie and Gabriel. As they might have passed between Martha and Daniel, were she to look up at him.
Runs-from-Bears said, “You are very quiet, Martha.”
“We’ve had an unusually eventful couple days,” said Daniel.
“I’d say so,” Annie said. “Martha got married and started teaching school and Jemima showed up, all at once.”
There was a small silence, and Martha decided that it would be best to break it.
She said, “I have no complaints. Just the opposite. I am very glad to be here. You are all very kind, but you don’t need to spare my feelings. I know what my mother is, and what she is capable of.”
“That’s not you,” said Runs-from-Bears.
“So I’ve been telling her,” Daniel said. “But it’s taking a while to sink in.”
“Well then, you’ll have to come up here regular,” Gabriel said. “And not just to swim.”
Gabriel’s smile flashed, and in that moment Martha had a memory of him from their days at school together. He was always up to something, organizing races or baggataway games in the lunch recess. Together with Annie he had taken every chance to go explore the far—and forbidden side—of Hidden Wolf. They were much closer to her in age than Daniel and Lily, but still they seemed older and settled.
She said, “I will visit, I promise.”
“Good,” Susanna said. “I should like that very much.”
“In case you’re not hearing us plain enough,” said Runs-from-Bears, “you’re at home here. The mountain is your place now, and Lake in the Clouds is where you come if you need help.”
“Thank you,” Martha said. Her voice wavered and broke, but no one was rude enough to take note.
“Don’t get too excited,” Annie said with a half smile. “Most of the time we’ll put you straight to work.”
As tired as she was, it still took Martha a good while to fall into a deep sleep. All the things that had happened in one day, so many it would take her a long time to sort them all through. Her wakefulness rose and fell on the night breeze. A tumble of faces and conversations swelled and receded, and followed her into sleep.
Chapter XLVI
Ethan had a mantel clock, a pretty thing of polished cherry wood with delicate hands to point out the time.