The Marriage Merger
Page 33

Sawyer stretched and rubbed the back of his neck. He’d changed into a pair of loose khaki slacks and a clean white T-shirt, and he sported bare feet. The intimacy of sharing a house suddenly loomed before her. Seeing him in all forms of undress, but not feeling she had the right to touch him.
Panic lit. What if she couldn’t play this charade? It was their honeymoon night, and she had no idea how to act. Cool and sophisticated? Warm and friendly? She ached to crawl under the covers and hide for the night, but wouldn’t that look pathetic at this point? He spoke with no idea regarding her looming attack. “yeah, me, too. I have to get up early to go to the site tomorrow. Are you finished up?”
“yes.”
“Wanna join me for a quick drink before bed?”
Her nerves shrieked and her body jumped to come out and play. She deliberately squeezed her thighs together in rebellion. “Sure. Wouldn’t mind a taste of cognac before sleep. I’ve got an early morning, too.”
She followed him down the winding staircase, her fingers lightly tracing the smooth mahogany as they walked into the library. Julietta took a soothing breath of lemon, paper, and leather. Between both of them, they’d filled up the mounted bookcases with a variety of fiction, biography, business, and cooking. She’d been fascinated by his eclectic reading taste and found he could hold a conversation on practically any topic. She took a seat close to the fireplace and tucked her feet underneath her. It was important they set a precedent for the future. Julietta decided she’d be friendly, but distant.
He handed her the snifter of amber liquid and sat beside her. The warmth of the fire enveloped them in a com-fortable haze, and she relaxed a bit. “you looked beautiful today,” he said.
Julietta smiled. “Grazie. you didn’t look too bad yourself. And Wolfe was quite handsome. He even took out his many piercings.”
Sawyer laughed and sipped his drink. “yeah, he cleans up nice. I never got to thank you. For your advice with Wolfe.” He lifted his gaze and pinned her with sheer intensity. “He was going to walk, and if I hadn’t asked him to stay, we would’ve both been alone. How did you know?”
She swallowed past the tightness in her throat. “I saw the way you look at each other. respect. Admiration. Care.
you may have met as strangers, but he’s part of you now.
That’s how family is. They drive you crazy, push you to the edge, but family stands true.”
“I always had the opposite.”
“I know. But family isn’t about blood. It’s about sticking and loyalty and sacrifice. I didn’t want you to let Wolfe go because of pride.”
“And that’s why you agreed to marry me. right?”
Julietta stiffened, afraid he might guess too much of the truth. yes, she’d done it for family. For Papa. For business.
But the secret part inside told her she’d only marry someone she cared about, felt safe with. Sawyer was both. “yes, that’s right.”
“Did you ever think of marrying before?”
His probing surprised her, but she decided to answer.
“No. There was one man I got close to. We worked together.
For a little while, I wondered what it would be like to come home to him at night. Share meals, a bed, a life. But I started to realize things were flat between us. We made a good connection on paper, but he never sought time with me. I was like his conferences—scheduled in.” She remembered that feeling of inadequacy as she craved to forge more of a connection before realizing he wasn’t interested. He’d been calm and rational in what he wanted—a wife for business, a companion for company. Her frigidity annoyed him, but he never took time to push for more of a reaction from her, which only caused more friction and numbness every time he took her in his arms. eventually, the relationship with-ered and died without a speck of smoke or flame.
“Sounds like a real dickhead.”
A faint smile passed her lips, but the ghosts had been unleashed. The words popped out of her mouth. “No, he just didn’t want me enough. No man ever has.”
The sudden focus of his attention shifted. Those hot eyes roved over her body, reminding her of all the places he’d touched and licked and bitten, and the hundreds of ways he’d made her explode beneath him. “I repeat. He was a dickhead. And a moron.”
Humiliated at her confession, she laughed it off and straightened in her chair. “I agree. I rarely give him a second thought, so it was for the best.” Her lie lay between them like a big fat elephant in true cliché form. “How about you? Any desire before to walk down the aisle?”
“No.”
His flat admission made her cock her head. “I know you’ve been with many women. you seem to like compan-ionship. What was missing?”
Darkness danced over his face. A shadow fell over his cheek and highlighted his scar. “Nothing. everything. I’m able to have fun and have a sexual affair, but they always demanded more. Things I couldn’t give. So I kept moving on.”
“And now? What will you do now?”
Her challenge seemed to startle him. “I don’t think I’ve ever met another woman as direct as you.”
“I’m not sure that’s a compliment.”
He gave a short laugh. “It is. you’re able to consistently surprise and challenge me. Is it time for our heart-to-heart?”
Her temper simmered again and she narrowed her eyes.
“I don’t enjoy being mocked. Why don’t we do what’s best for us? Work together. Share space. respect. We’ll keep those more base emotions out of the equation so neither of us loses focus. Agreed?”
He studied her mercilessly, but she refused to yield.
Julietta remained still under his scrutiny. Her mind screamed for him to take the compromise. Her gut screamed for him to ignore her polite request and drag her to bed. Finally, he nodded. “As you wish.”
The air turned flat and stale. Her energy drained out like a broken pipe, and she quickly finished her cognac.
“I’m glad we agree. It’s for the best. If you don’t mind, I’m going to bed.”
“I took the adjoining room just in case Wolfe gets suspi-cious.”
“of course.” She set her snifter on the table and forced a smile. “Good night, Sawyer.”
“Good night, Julietta. Sleep tight.”
She left the room and headed toward bed, half relieved and half heartbroken …
Sawyer refilled his glass as the door shut behind him. He still smelled her unique scent of mocha and coconut that made his mouth salivate for a candy bar. But she was much tastier, the memory of her thighs spread wide and her gor-geous honey flowing free over his lips.
Jesus, he was going to lose it.
His dick strained in a desperate effort to break free of his pants. Was she trying to drive him insane? She wanted a companion. Work partner. Friend. How could he con-centrate on those aspects when he ached to strip away her polite veneer and uncover the wild, sensual woman he’d discovered in his bed? And how long would he hold out?
He imagined himself exploding during a calm dinner and ripping off her clothes in a frenzy.
But would she like that?
Her words haunted him. No man had ever wanted her enough. His very tough, capable woman had her own demons. He bet the few men she’d tried to forge relationships with had wrecked her self-confidence. How else could a sexy, smart, independent woman think she wasn’t good enough for marriage?
Maybe he needed to show her.
The possibility danced along the edges of his mind. He could accept her terms and they’d move forward with no messiness. Probably the best course. But the look on her face when he agreed told him a very different truth.
No man had ever been strong enough to challenge her.
Push her. Seduce her. Her body melted under his instruc-tion; her mind cracked open to allow secret entry that both humbled and inspired him. He craved her like a drug in-jected in his veins, and though it was unpredictable and cha-otic and unplanned, he needed her.
Allowing her to sleep in her cold bed tonight would only let her build back her defenses. The right thing to do would be to leave her alone. He didn’t do love. She was a woman who deserved it. But what was worse? Keeping her safe but believing she wasn’t enough for a man to fight for?
or dragging her into his bed and risking heartbreak?
His brain told him clearly the only decision he could make. The path he followed since he found out he’d killed his foster brother as clearly as pulling the trigger.
But tonight all the thinking power had gone to his dick, and there was only one decision he’d be making tonight.
Sawyer set down his drink and went to claim his wife.
…
Julietta twisted in the pale blue sheets, kicking out one leg in an effort to cool down. For such an old house, the radiators pumped heat in massive gulps, and sweat clung to her neck and upper back. With a groan, she threw back all the covers and stared at the ceiling. Her body throbbed with a desire that wouldn’t be quenched tonight. Too bad she didn’t own a vibrator. of course, she’d always been too embarrassed to try it before, afraid even a gadget wouldn’t push past her icy core toward orgasm.
Amazing how Sawyer seemed to sense whenever she was pulled out of her body. He yanked her right back to the moment and refused to let her mind take over.
Stop thinking about Sawyer.
Sleep. Focus on sleep. Julietta closed her eyes and started counting. one. Two. Three. Had she approved the finance report for the quarter? yes, she’d sent it. Four. Five.
Six. Was it her secretary’s birthday this week? She needed to buy a present tomorrow. Seven. eight. Nine— The door opened.
She sat up. Stared at the figure before her. He’d taken off his shirt, so the moonlight played over the naked skin of his chest. The cut muscles of his abs and biceps shimmered amidst the wicked scars fighting for dominance. He stood with bare feet apart, hands on hips, gaze narrowed in quiet power. In that moment, the blood roared in her veins in a pure adrenaline rush. She swayed slightly, trying to breath through the crazy hammering of her heart. “What are you doing in here?”
“I think you know.”
His voice oozed like salted caramel. Smooth and rough and sexy as hell. She tried to answer but only squeaked some type of pathetic sound. He moved slowly, each grace-ful motion a deliberate action to pump up the sensual tension whipping through the room. She sat frozen amidst the sheets like a terrified doe about to be swallowed whole.
Julietta murmured the only word with the power to stop the roller coaster of emotion she was terrified to ride on. “No.”
He stopped beside her bed. His aura pumped out a raw, male scent that caused a low moan to rip from her throat.
Sawyer reached out and grasped her wrist. Pulled her from the mattress so she stood. Her pale pink nightgown clearly showed the thrust of her naked nipples, the shadow of her body beneath the delicate fabric. In her bare feet, he tow-ered over her with a domineering manner that screamed he was in charge. of everything.
“you’re my wife. It’s our wedding night. I heard your proper speech and agree that keeping sex out of the equation would be the smart thing for each of us.” He paused, lifting his palm to caress her cheek, stroke back the tangled wave of hair from her shoulder. “But I can’t. I won’t. you belong to me.”