Griffin shrugged indifferently.
“Nora says he’s a great priest.”
* * *
“So what do you want to talk about? We’ve been having the same fight for five years. I guess we can have it again. Yes, I miss you. Yes, I miss it. No, I’m not coming back.”
“You would assume this was all about you, wouldn’t you?” Søren said.
“If it isn’t, then what?” she demanded, angry at herself for still being so affected by him even after all this time.
“I told you when I saw you again we would discuss Wesley.”
Nora took a step back.
“No, not him. He’s not on the table. He’s not up for negotiation.”
Søren’s eyes flashed at her. “Fitting as I do not negotiate.”
“I’m not giving Wesley up.”
“He’s not one of us, Eleanor, and you know it. You never should have allowed him into your home. This is a dangerous game you are playing and one or both of you will be deeply hurt by it.”
“Wes isn’t a game. He’s my best friend. Jesus, Søren, he’s my only friend.” Nora hated admitting it but she knew it was true. Everyone in her life—Zach included—she’d either slept with or planned to.
“Friend? He’s your pet and you are using him. A game is only fair when both parties know they are playing it.”
“You don’t know anything about us. You haven’t even met him.”
Søren took her chin in his hand, gripping it to the edge of pain.
“Do you think,” Søren asked slowly, “that there is any corner of your life you can keep from me?”
“Why do you care what happens to Wes?”
“One of us has to. Is he a virgin still?” Søren demanded and Nora turned away from him. “Answer me, young lady.”
“Yes,” she said, too well-trained to ignore a direct order. “We’re just friends.”
“Only for love would you ever sleep alone. I could have had you when you were fifteen years old, Eleanor. And although I burned for you, although my desire for you grew until the calendar of my life counted down only the days and months and years I had to wait until I could make you mine, I still kept you a virgin. Why?”
Nora rolled her eyes. “Because you’re a sadist.”
Søren reached for her and held her by the shoulders. His hands on her bare skin sent electricity running through her whole body.
“Because I loved you. I wouldn’t take you until you were ready. You keep Wesley for yourself as I kept you for me. But you were born for this life and he was not. You will harm him if you keep him any longer.”
“I would never hurt Wes.” A knot tightened in her throat.
“It will end badly, Eleanor. As will that, if you aren’t careful,” Søren said, indicating Zach sitting at the bar with Griffin. Griffin glanced at the mirror and winked. Of course, Griffin knew it was a two-way mirror that hung behind the bar. She and he had snuck back here for some quick kinky sex more than once. “Your editor. He seemed surprised when we met. You haven’t told him everything about us. What else haven’t you told him?”
Nora twisted her riding crop in her hands.
“Eleanor…” Søren scolded in his most insufferable paternalistic voice. “How will he feel when he discovers that writing isn’t your only source of income?”
“I was going to tell him. I will tell him. When the book’s done.”
“He cares for you, Eleanor. I can see it in his eyes. He’s letting himself care for you and it terrifies him. He won’t take betrayal lightly.”
“Then I won’t betray him. The book is more than halfway done. And Zach…he’s amazing. He’s smart and funny. He’s—”
“Married. I thought I taught you better than that.”
“They’re separated. They even live on separate continents.”
“Are you attempting to convince me or yourself?” Søren asked. Nora closed her eyes, exhaling as Søren slipped his hands down her arms. “If he hasn’t taken you yet, and I’m sure you’ve offered, it is because he still loves his wife. Broken love is the most dangerous love. It will slice you open with every touch.”
“Like your love?”
Søren dipped his head and kissed her from her neck to the tip of her shoulder. She exhaled with bliss as his lips met her skin. No other lover had ever made her feel what Søren could.
“You haven’t broken me yet,” he said into her ear. It took everything she had to keep from turning around and sinking into his arms. “Are you following my rule still, Eleanor?”
Nora bit her bottom lip. “Yes. Mostly. More or less.”
“Eleanor…” he said in a warning tone.
“I do write about you,” she admitted. “All the time. But I always delete or shred it.”
“Then why do you write about me, about us, if you destroy your own words?”
“They aren’t just words. They’re memories. I like to read them, hold them in my hands. And then I can let them go. A little bit at least.”
“You will never love anyone as you love me,” Søren said and as much as she wanted to slap him for his arrogance, she couldn’t disagree. “Not even Wesley. Not even him.” Søren’s eyes came to rest on Zach at the bar talking with Griffin. “But I think you care for him more than you realize. This must be terrifying for you.”
“Nora says he’s a great priest.”
* * *
“So what do you want to talk about? We’ve been having the same fight for five years. I guess we can have it again. Yes, I miss you. Yes, I miss it. No, I’m not coming back.”
“You would assume this was all about you, wouldn’t you?” Søren said.
“If it isn’t, then what?” she demanded, angry at herself for still being so affected by him even after all this time.
“I told you when I saw you again we would discuss Wesley.”
Nora took a step back.
“No, not him. He’s not on the table. He’s not up for negotiation.”
Søren’s eyes flashed at her. “Fitting as I do not negotiate.”
“I’m not giving Wesley up.”
“He’s not one of us, Eleanor, and you know it. You never should have allowed him into your home. This is a dangerous game you are playing and one or both of you will be deeply hurt by it.”
“Wes isn’t a game. He’s my best friend. Jesus, Søren, he’s my only friend.” Nora hated admitting it but she knew it was true. Everyone in her life—Zach included—she’d either slept with or planned to.
“Friend? He’s your pet and you are using him. A game is only fair when both parties know they are playing it.”
“You don’t know anything about us. You haven’t even met him.”
Søren took her chin in his hand, gripping it to the edge of pain.
“Do you think,” Søren asked slowly, “that there is any corner of your life you can keep from me?”
“Why do you care what happens to Wes?”
“One of us has to. Is he a virgin still?” Søren demanded and Nora turned away from him. “Answer me, young lady.”
“Yes,” she said, too well-trained to ignore a direct order. “We’re just friends.”
“Only for love would you ever sleep alone. I could have had you when you were fifteen years old, Eleanor. And although I burned for you, although my desire for you grew until the calendar of my life counted down only the days and months and years I had to wait until I could make you mine, I still kept you a virgin. Why?”
Nora rolled her eyes. “Because you’re a sadist.”
Søren reached for her and held her by the shoulders. His hands on her bare skin sent electricity running through her whole body.
“Because I loved you. I wouldn’t take you until you were ready. You keep Wesley for yourself as I kept you for me. But you were born for this life and he was not. You will harm him if you keep him any longer.”
“I would never hurt Wes.” A knot tightened in her throat.
“It will end badly, Eleanor. As will that, if you aren’t careful,” Søren said, indicating Zach sitting at the bar with Griffin. Griffin glanced at the mirror and winked. Of course, Griffin knew it was a two-way mirror that hung behind the bar. She and he had snuck back here for some quick kinky sex more than once. “Your editor. He seemed surprised when we met. You haven’t told him everything about us. What else haven’t you told him?”
Nora twisted her riding crop in her hands.
“Eleanor…” Søren scolded in his most insufferable paternalistic voice. “How will he feel when he discovers that writing isn’t your only source of income?”
“I was going to tell him. I will tell him. When the book’s done.”
“He cares for you, Eleanor. I can see it in his eyes. He’s letting himself care for you and it terrifies him. He won’t take betrayal lightly.”
“Then I won’t betray him. The book is more than halfway done. And Zach…he’s amazing. He’s smart and funny. He’s—”
“Married. I thought I taught you better than that.”
“They’re separated. They even live on separate continents.”
“Are you attempting to convince me or yourself?” Søren asked. Nora closed her eyes, exhaling as Søren slipped his hands down her arms. “If he hasn’t taken you yet, and I’m sure you’ve offered, it is because he still loves his wife. Broken love is the most dangerous love. It will slice you open with every touch.”
“Like your love?”
Søren dipped his head and kissed her from her neck to the tip of her shoulder. She exhaled with bliss as his lips met her skin. No other lover had ever made her feel what Søren could.
“You haven’t broken me yet,” he said into her ear. It took everything she had to keep from turning around and sinking into his arms. “Are you following my rule still, Eleanor?”
Nora bit her bottom lip. “Yes. Mostly. More or less.”
“Eleanor…” he said in a warning tone.
“I do write about you,” she admitted. “All the time. But I always delete or shred it.”
“Then why do you write about me, about us, if you destroy your own words?”
“They aren’t just words. They’re memories. I like to read them, hold them in my hands. And then I can let them go. A little bit at least.”
“You will never love anyone as you love me,” Søren said and as much as she wanted to slap him for his arrogance, she couldn’t disagree. “Not even Wesley. Not even him.” Søren’s eyes came to rest on Zach at the bar talking with Griffin. “But I think you care for him more than you realize. This must be terrifying for you.”
