The Woods Out Back
Chapter 9 Rules Is Rules

"I have you," Kelsey said again. "And you must fulfill my wish before you shall regain your freedom."
The dwarf considered the shackles and the loosely looped chain for a moment. He had relative freedom of movement, for the chain dragged long on the floor behind him. He looked at Kelsey and smiled widely, showing one large hole where a tooth had once been.
Kelsey seemed to read his thoughts."Biellen," the elf whispered, even as Geno's legs started to move. Geno had hardly taken a step before the magical chain suddenly shortened, pulling his arms tightly behind his back. His gap-toothed smile disappeared along with his balance, replaced by a wide-eyed look of disbelief as he pitched headlong to the floor.
"Now we are leaving," declared the victorious elf, scooping up his sword and laying its blade to the side of Geno's stubby neck. "By the lawful rules of capture, you are bound to me. I'll not tolerate any more resistance." He pulled the dwarf to his feet, while Mickey went to see about Gary.
"Nasty dents in the helm," the leprechaun remarked. "I'm hoping yer head isn't the same."
"Yes... er, no," Gary replied, somewhat absently. He had watched the capture from afar, his thoughts still filled with spinning hammers and pretty stars - there seemed to be so many stars in this wondrous land!
With Mickey's help, the young man managed to get unsteadily back to his feet, and once there, Gary realized just how sore he was, from the fall and the hammers, and just crawling across the jagged rocks. Every joint in his body seemed as if it had been pulled and stretched beyond its limits. There was not time for whining, though, not with Geno captured and many other crafty dwarfs nearby no doubt already spinning devious spells to block their escape.
Kelsey quickly collected Geno's hammers, and some heavy gloves the dwarf kept near the burning forge, and the troupe prepared to depart.
"I've lost my spear," Gary remarked as Mickey started away. Three sets of eyes turned to him.
"In the fall," he explained. "It's probably in the river, a mile away by now."
Mickey looked to Geno. "Spear?" he asked. The dwarf nodded to a cubby, barely a crack in the wall. Mickey cast him a suspicious glance, then wagged a finger the crack's way. A dozen different weapons came tumbling into the room to the leprechaun's magical call: swords, axes, a tall halberd, and one spear. "Better than the one ye lost," Mickey muttered and he floated the iron-shafted weapon into Gary's hands.
Feeling the balance of the dwarf-crafted weapon, Gary couldn't disagree.
"Now we must be on our way," Kelsey demanded. He looked straight into the dwarf's gray-blue eyes. "Which way?"
Geno nodded towards a narrow tunnel on the far side of the little chamber. Gary regarded it curiously for a second, mentally comparing this image to the one he had seen when first he gazed upon the hearth-lighted room.
"That opening wasn't there before," he started to protest, fearful of this newest trick, vividly recalling the biting maw in the earth up along the high trail.
Mickey looked to him, then nodded to Kelsey. Then, to Gary's disbelief, Kelsey continued straight ahead, leading the way to the tunnel.
The elf had barely crossed the threshold when the walls snapped shut, jagged stone teeth closing about the elf.
Geno Hammerthrower squealed with glee.
"No!" Gary shouted, and started forward.
Mickey intercepted him. "Haven't ye learned yet to look through the mist?" Gary didn't understand until the real Kelsey, still standing next to Geno, slapped him on the shoulder.
The dwarf's devious grin disappeared, replaced by a stone-face grimace.
"Rules is rules," Mickey scolded the dwarf.
"You reject the rules of capture?" Kelsey added angrily. "You disgrace your people and your trade? You are the finest smithy in all of Faerie, Geno Hammerthrower; you should understand your responsibilities in these matters."
"Not a fair capture!" the dwarf huffed. He stomped one heavy boot and tried to cross his arms over his thick chest, but of course, the shackles wouldn't allow for that.
"How so?" Kelsey and Mickey asked together.
"You caught me," Geno said to Kelsey. "But you were not the first attacker. Rules is rules!" he snarled, imitating Mickey's accent. "And by the rules, only the first attacker is entitled to make the capture!"
"Who...," Mickey started to ask, but then he realized the answer as he looked at Gary, the only one who had been in the chamber before Kelsey.
"You have ruined everything!" Kelsey roared at poor, confused Gary. "By what authority did you take it upon yourself..."
"I didn't do anything!" Gary protested.
"Stonebubbles!" Geno yelled, thrusting his chiseled chin Gary's way. "He hit me with a rock - right in the face!" The dwarf took a step to the side and kicked the same rock, lying conspicuously next to the fallen flagon in the middle of the floor.
"Explain your actions!" Kelsey demanded of Gary.
"I wasn't trying to catch him," Gary stammered.
"To kill me, then?" Geno huffed. "That, too, denies the elf the right of capture..."
"No!" cried Gary. He looked helplessly to Mickey, the only possible supporter in the room. "I just tried to stop him from drinking the mead."
"Worse than killing me!" Geno roared.
"It was poisoned," Gary explained.
"Poisoned?" Mickey balked. "Come now, lad. How might ye know such a thing?"
"I saw it," Gary replied, and now everyone, even the outraged dwarf, was listening intently. "The raven... I mean the snake. Well, it was a raven when it flew in, but it became a snake, and it crawled up the table to the mug. It had started for you," he said, pointing to the dwarf. "I don't know, maybe it didn't think it would like the taste of dwarf."
"That's believable enough," Mickey put in with a snicker.
"Then it went to the cup," Gary continued. "I saw it, I swear. The snake hooked its fangs on the top of the cup and pumped venom in. I swear it."
"Fairy tales!" Geno snarled.
"Look who's talking," Gary retorted.
Kelsey and Mickey stared long and hard at each other. If their suspicions about the source of their continuing problems were correct, Gary's story was not so unbelievable.
The issue became almost irrelevant a moment later, though, when the wall at the back of the small chamber split wide and a dozen bandy-legged dwarfs charged in, wielding all sorts of nasty-looking cudgels. They surrounded the companions in the blink of an eye, and one of them, a hunchbacked, gray-haired, and gray-bearded creature, asked Geno casually, "Which one shall we kill first?"
"Hold, Durin," Geno replied, not so quick to risk his reputation, though he hardly believed Gary's tale.
Kelsey clutched his sword hilt tightly, inching it closer to Geno's exposed neck. But Mickey, pulling out his long pipe, seemed well at ease.
"And tell me," the leprechaun bade, suddenly putting all the pieces of this puzzle together, "Who telled ye that we were about?"
Durin and his black-haired brother exchanged curious glances. "We saw you ourselves," Dvalin replied honestly - and purposely dodging the question. "Crossing the high trails."
"And do ye always attack wandering travelers?" Mickey asked. "For, to be sure, me and me friends were attacked, and attacked by dwarfish magic."
"Thieves!" Dvalin snapped angrily.
"And how did ye know our intent?" Mickey replied, taking a deep draw, appearing not at all concerned. "Who telled ye that we came for Geno?"
The dwarven brothers looked to each other again and shrugged, wondering what could be the harm. "It was a great speaking bird," Durin replied.
"A raven?" asked Mickey, and he looked to Gary and nodded.
Both the dwarfs bobbed their heads.
Mickey waggled a finger, retrieving the fallen flagon. "There's a bit o' mead left inside," the leprechaun explained, holding the flagon out to Geno. "Would ye care for a drink?"
Geno kicked the stone at his feet clear across the room. "Damn!" he spat.
"What is it, rock-kin?" Durin cried, and all the dwarfs took up their weapons. "Who must we kill?"
"None!" Geno growled back. "I am caught fairly, it would seem, indentured to this elf" - the word did not sound like a compliment - "and owing my life to this wretched human thing."
"No!" came several dwarven voices all at once, and the dwarfs took up their weapons and advanced another step towards the companions. But Geno knew well the rules of capture, a responsibility that the finest smithy in Faerie often found dropped upon his rock-hard shoulders.
They left the Firth of Buldre a short time later, accompanied by an armed guard of twenty none-too-happy dwarfs. The bandy-legged warriors did not try to hinder Kelsey's departure at all, though, even though the elf had Geno firmly in tow.
Gary did not quite understand it all, and his continued ignorance bothered him even after the other dwarfs had departed and the companions were once again out on the open trails.
"Why did they let us go?" he asked Mickey, who was perched comfortably on his shoulder again, readingThe Hobbit.
"Why did this hobbit feel guilty about gaining the ring from the wretch in the cave?" Mickey answered without missing a beat. He held the open book Gary's way.
Gary thought about it for just a moment; he knew the tale as well as any. "Bilbo didn't play fairly at the riddle game," he replied. "He cheated, and his keeping the magic ring could have been considered stealing. Although," Gary quickly added, in defense of his favorite character, "if he had given it back, he would have been invited for supper, if you know what I mean."
"And there ye have it," Mickey said. "For still, he felt guilty. Faerie, too, is a land of ancient rules. And rules is rules, lad. To break them would bring ye dishonor in the eyes of all. What are ye without yer honor, I ask? Even the wretch, this Gollum thing, a murderer and thief a hundred times over and a heap bit worse than our Geno, thinked twice about cheating in the riddle game."
Gary considered the answer, wondering how many people of his own world would have given in to the capture merely for the sake of an intangible thing such as their honor, as had Geno, with so obvious an advantage in the fight.
"Just one more question," he begged Mickey, who had gone back to his reading. The leprechaun looked up.
"You said that illusions wouldn't work on dwarfs, but in Geno's room, you fooled him completely with the image of Kelsey walking into the phony tunnel."
"Indeed, illusions do not work well on dwarfs," Mickey replied. "But I showed Geno just what Geno most wanted to see. Tricks work much the finer when they play on yer target's heart. Even if yer target's a dwarf."
Gary nodded; it seemed logical enough. "Where now?" he asked, looking ahead to Kelsey and the dwarf.
"Ye said one question," Mickey reminded him.
Gary gave him a pleading look.
"Straight through the mountains to the east," Mickey replied. "The trails are flat and not to be so tough with Geno talking to the stones. Then north to Gondabuggan, to buy a gnomish thief - second best thieves in all the world are the gnomes."
Gary suspected that he knew which race ranked above the gnomes, but he kept his thought to himself.
"Then back to the southern end of Dvergamal," Mickey went on. "And up the plain and the Crahgs to a place called Giant's Thumb." He dropped his voice to a mysterious whisper as he finished. "Where ye'll meet the worm."
Ceridwen looked across the few miles to Dvergamal, where she knew Kelsey's party was making fine progress. The sorceress had left the stronghold of the dwarfs soon after the companions had set out from the falls. With the dwarfs on their guard and in their mountain homeland, Ceridwen knew that she could do little against Kelsey. She had to somehow turn the party back, get them out on the plain west of the mountains, and buy herself some time.
She stood under a holly tree beside an unremarkable gray stone, surrounded by lifeless dirt, a spot she had marked well in ages past. "Come awake, Old Wife," the sorceress demanded softly. "I know your guise and need you now."
A long uneventful moment passed.
"Come awake, Old Wife!" Ceridwen called again, more loudly. She reached into a pocket of her black robes and took out a small bag, passing it quickly back and forth from hand to hand, for it was deathly cold.
"Summer has passed, autumn wanes," the sorceress lied, and she opened the bag over the stone, sprinkling icy magical crystals. The stone began to tremble almost immediately. Its hue shifted from dull gray to icy blue, and then it began to grow and re-form.
Soon it towered over the sorceress, twenty feet high and still growing. Its shape became that of an old woman, white-haired, one-eyed, and with skin as blue as winter ice on a clear day. Despite her height, the giantess appeared a meager thing, incredibly lean and wrapped in a tattered plaid.
"Cailleac," Ceridwen whispered, obviously impressed by the spectacle.
The giantess looked about curiously. "Allhallows has not passed," she said through her brown-stained teeth. "What trick is this?" She looked down then, and seemed to notice Ceridwen for the first time.
"Ah, sorceress," the Cailleac said, as if those words explained everything.
"I need you," Ceridwen explained.
"My time is not come," the Cailleac replied sternly.
"Just in Dvergamal," Ceridwen quickly added. "In the mountains where the chill wind blows even in the high days of summer. A small favor is all that I ask, and then you may return to your slumbers."
The Cailleac looked around at the new-blossomed flowers and the green summer canopy, feeling uncomfortable. Ceridwen tossed another handful of chilling dust at her and that seemed to comfort her.
"Do this for me and I will have your bed tended throughout the season," Ceridwen promised. "My minions will keep it cold for you and signal you when Allhallows is passed."
"Just in the mountains?" the Cailleac tentatively agreed.
Ceridwen smiled and nodded, confident that she had just bought herself the time she needed.
The companions camped on a flat stone in a gully between towering peaks. The wind was stiff this night, their second from the Firth of Buldre, and a bit chill, but it seemed refreshing to the weary troupe. Gary, Mickey, and Geno sat around the fire, with Gary glad for the break from wearing his cumbersome armor. Kelsey thought them safe enough in Dvergamal with a dwarven guide, and with the other dwarfs sworn to leave them be. The stones would tell Geno of the approach of any enemy long before the creature became a threat. The elf had even removed Geno's shackles, knowing that the bonds of responsibility would hold the dwarf tighter than any metal ever could.
Gary never took his gaze off the dwarf. Geno was much different from his kin (at least from those that Gary had seen), younger looking, almost boyish, despite his obvious strength. His unkempt hair was lustrous and his gray-blue eyes shone clear and bright and inquisitive. His missing tooth reminded Gary of a mischievous nephew back in that other world, a boy whose smile inevitably signaled trouble.
"How long have you been a smithy?" Gary asked, surprising even himself with the words. He had been silently trying to determine the curious dwarf's approximate age.
Geno snapped an unblinking glare upon him and did not respond. Mickey, too, paused in his reading to look up at Gary.
"I mean," Gary stammered, suddenly uncomfortable, "is that all you do?"
The dwarf rose and walked out of the firelight.
"What?" Gary asked, looking back to Mickey.
The leprechaun chuckled and went back to the book.
"What did I say to offend him?" Gary pressed, not willing to let this issue slip past.
"Ye think he'd be one for talking?" Mickey replied. "He's catched, lad."
"So were you, but you seemed friendly enough," Gary replied indignantly, brushing his black hair out of his eyes.
"I'm a leprechaun," Mickey answered. "I'm supposed to get catched. Makes everyone's life a bit more exciting, don't ye see?"
"Bull," said Gary. "You were as miserable as Geno - probably still are - but at least you had... have... the decency to talk to your companions." He said it loudly, purposely wanting Geno to overhear. "I'm a captive, too, when you get right down to it."
"Geno's owing to ye," Mickey explained. "It's not something he's comfortable over."
Gary didn't understand.
"Ye saved his life," Mickey went on, chuckling softly at Gary's continuing confusion. The young man couldn't quite seem to catch on to anything in Faerie. "Rules is rules," Mickey explained. "And, sure enough, there be rules for saving lives, too."
"He's coming with us; I thought that was my repayment," Gary replied.
"He's come to answer for Kelsey's capture, not for yerself," Mickey explained. "This is the elf's quest, and not yer own."
Geno walked back into the firelight then, still staring unblinkingly at Gary.
"I don't want any favors!" Gary snapped suddenly, sick of that stare.
Geno hooted and charged right through the dancing flames. He was on top of Gary in an instant, easily pinning the young man flat on his back.
"Ye shouldn't've said that," Mickey remarked, and he went back to his book.
Gary couldn't believe the strength of the dwarf's iron-like grip. He struggled and wiggled to no avail, and all the while, Geno leered at him, showing the gap in his shiny teeth.
"Let me...," Gary started to say, but Geno head-butted him and shut him up.
"What is going on here?" Kelsey demanded, storming into the camp, his sword drawn.
"The boy insulted the dwarf," Mickey replied absently.
Geno hopped off Gary, growled at Kelsey, and went back to his place opposite the fire, again walking straight through the glowing embers. He spun about and plopped down, dropping his accusing, threatening stare fully over Gary once again.
He kept it up interminably; Gary fell asleep with that uncomfortable image full in his thoughts.
Gary awoke sometime before dawn, shivering, for the wind had grown wickedly chill. Mickey and the others were also up and about, trying to get the fire back to life in the whipping breeze.
"Are we that high up?" Gary asked, moving to join them.
Geno and Kelsey ignored him, as usual, and as usual, Mickey tried to explain.
"Not so high," the leprechaun replied. "And a bit cold for the season even if we were among the tallest peaks of Dvergamal. But not to fear; we'll get the fire up in a bit, and a bit after that we'll find the morning sun."
Dawn did come soon after, but it was a gray and unwarming one, shrouded by a heavy overcast. The wind relented somewhat, but the air hung cold about the companions, their breath coming out in visible puffs.
"It smells like snow," Mickey remarked. Kelsey seemed not to appreciate the grim observation. He led them off without even a breakfast.
The first flakes drifted down around them less than an hour later.
Kelsey looked to Geno - this was the dwarf's homeland, after all - for some explanation, but the smithy offered nothing and seemed as confused as the rest of them.
"Do we go on or go back?" Mickey asked. "We've a week o' walking before us, but just two days behind."
"The weather cannot continue," Kelsey insisted. "Summer is upon us - even Dvergamal warms under its gentle breath."
As if in response, the wind groaned loudly throughout the mountain valleys.
By noon, snow was beginning to collect and many rocks grew dangerously slick with nearly invisible ice. It was then that the companions found their answers.
Geno bolted straight upright, as though some unknown voice had spoken to him. He rushed back to a high point the party had just passed and peered through the still-gathering storm into the far distance.
"Cailleac Bheur!" the dwarf cried, the first words he had spoken since they had left his waterfall home.
Mickey and Kelsey nearly fell over at the unexpected revelation. When they finally recovered, they rushed to join the dwarf, with Gary right on their heels.
Gary peered through the storm to the distant peaks. He thought he saw something, but simply couldn't bring himself to believe it.
"Cailleac Bheur!" Geno cried again.
"The Old Wife," Mickey translated for Gary.
Gary looked harder, beginning to understand that his vision was no trick of the weather. Drifting on the wind from mountaintop to mountaintop, barely visible through the snowy veil, was a huge woman, leaning on a giant staff and trailed by several large herons.
"Suren ye've heard of the Blue Hag," Mickey said to Gary. "'Tis she that brings the winter, withers the crops, and freezes the ground. Her touch is death, lad, to men and to the land."
"It is months before her time," Kelsey argued.
But the elfs words rang hollow, for the Blue Hag drifted on towards them, leaving in her deathly wake snowcapped peaks where there had been, only moments before, bare stone.