Thirty-Six and a Half Motives
Page 8
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He spun around to face me, but his expression was still guarded.
“Last week I begged you to stay with me, Mason. Well, I won’t do that again. You know I’m sorry. You know I regret deceiving you. I know I have to earn your trust back, but the fact remains that what I did saved both of our lives. More than once.”
Anger sparked in his eyes. “I’m not having this conversation now.”
“Yes, you are,” I said, marching toward him. “Now is the perfect time to have this conversation.” I stopped in front of him, my hands on my hips. “You clearly have something to say to me, so say it.”
He took in a breath and pushed it out, his chest heaving. “Anything I have to say would be redundant. I said it all last week.”
“It’s clearly not out of your system,” I said, waving my hand at him. “You’re still ticked off at me.”
“I’m at work, Rose. This isn’t the time!”
“When did you come in this morning? Seven? Earlier?”
The scowl that wrinkled his forehead told me I’d guessed correctly.
“And how late did you stay last night? Eight? Nine?”
“What does my work schedule have to do with anything? Does this interrogation have a point?” he asked, irritation bleeding through his words.
“The point is that your work hours crowd into your personal life, so you can afford to take ten minutes in the middle of the day to talk to me.”
“You think this will only take ten minutes?” he asked in disbelief.
“I don’t know, Mason,” I challenged. “You tell me. I have no idea what you need to say.”
Fury filled his eyes. “I trusted you, Rose! I trusted you to confide in me.”
“I know,” I said, my own anger fading in the face of his.
“And I never suspected for a single moment that you would betray me by helping the very man I was trying to put behind bars. Do you have any idea how badly my reputation would be damaged if word got out?”
“I do.”
“You ran off and did God knows what with him and those . . . those criminals, lying to me about where you were and what you were doing while I was oblivious to it all. I feel like a fool, Rose. An utter fool.”
“I know. I’m sorry. But you’re not a fool, Mason. No one would ever accuse you of that.”
“I don’t know if I can forgive you.” He shook his head, releasing a derisive laugh. “But I love you. Despite it all, I still love you. And that makes me not trust myself.”
I understood. I’d spent the past five nights in my empty bed, trying to imagine myself in his shoes. Truth be told, I wouldn’t have believed him if he’d accepted my duplicity as if it meant nothing. But this still hurt like hades.
And I still needed answers.
“Do you think that J.R. will try to hurt me for what I did?”
He gave a tiny shudder, trying to switch gears. “I’m sure Joe told you this much, but he’s being transferred to the county jail today.”
“And you know that doesn’t mean squat.”
He nodded, looking down at his feet.
“So I’m at risk?”
“Yes.”
“You left me alone at the farmhouse knowing someone could come for me at any time?” I asked in disbelief.
“You haven’t been alone, Rose.” His gaze lifted to meet mine, and the regret and sadness there stole my breath. “You’ve had someone watching you since the moment we left the farmhouse last Friday morning.”
“Joe never told me.”
“Joe doesn’t know.”
“Jed?” The blood rushed from my head when he didn’t respond. “I didn’t know, Mason. I swear. I only found out from Carter right before I came over here.”
“You haven’t seen him?”
“No.” I paused. “How did you know?”
“I called Malcolm.”
My mouth dropped. “You did what?”
“Joe couldn’t get the sheriff’s department to spare a deputy to keep an eye on you. And I don’t trust J.R. Simmons for a minute. Jed was the one who saved you when you were kidnapped. I knew he’d be the best person to watch over you.”
“But you hate Skeeter Malcolm.”
“If I learned one thing last week, it’s that Malcolm will go to great lengths to protect you.” When I started to protest, he said, “Even if I was still out at the farmhouse, I wouldn’t be able to watch over you 24/7, so this is the next best thing.”
“Why would you protect me?”
“I might not be with you right now, but I still love you. Even though I’m angry as hell. Even though I feel utterly betrayed.” He groaned and rubbed his forehead with the back of his hand. “It’s killing me to not be with you, Rose. But I don’t trust you. And without trust, we have nothing.”
I nodded. “I know. And I hope to make it up to you somehow. I want to earn back your trust.”
I wasn’t sure what to do. Leave him alone to wrestle with the pain I’d caused him? Or stay and savor every moment I got with him? But maybe he was right. Maybe this wasn’t the time to force a decision about our future.
“What happens after J.R. gets moved to the county jail?” I asked, purposefully changing the subject.
“The state may move him to their own facility—they’re working on their own case—but for now he’ll stay in the county jail, unless his attorney can get the judge to reconsider granting him bail.”
“Will he?”
Mason sighed. “It’s not outside the realm of possibility.”
The thought sent a shiver down my spine. “Do you think he’ll get out of this?”
“It’ll be hard for him to shake the charges. But stranger things have happened, and there’s no denying J.R. Simmons has a way of making situations turn in his favor.”
“What about Kate and all the files she had on you?”
He paced to the window and lifted one of the wooden slats of the blinds to look across the street. “Joe says he found nothing. I can have you and Neely Kate give statements on what you saw, but I’m not sure that’s in your best interest. Your presence there was legally questionable to say the least, and Kate has moved whatever she had there. We have no way of figuring out where she moved it. It’s a dead end.”
“Last week I begged you to stay with me, Mason. Well, I won’t do that again. You know I’m sorry. You know I regret deceiving you. I know I have to earn your trust back, but the fact remains that what I did saved both of our lives. More than once.”
Anger sparked in his eyes. “I’m not having this conversation now.”
“Yes, you are,” I said, marching toward him. “Now is the perfect time to have this conversation.” I stopped in front of him, my hands on my hips. “You clearly have something to say to me, so say it.”
He took in a breath and pushed it out, his chest heaving. “Anything I have to say would be redundant. I said it all last week.”
“It’s clearly not out of your system,” I said, waving my hand at him. “You’re still ticked off at me.”
“I’m at work, Rose. This isn’t the time!”
“When did you come in this morning? Seven? Earlier?”
The scowl that wrinkled his forehead told me I’d guessed correctly.
“And how late did you stay last night? Eight? Nine?”
“What does my work schedule have to do with anything? Does this interrogation have a point?” he asked, irritation bleeding through his words.
“The point is that your work hours crowd into your personal life, so you can afford to take ten minutes in the middle of the day to talk to me.”
“You think this will only take ten minutes?” he asked in disbelief.
“I don’t know, Mason,” I challenged. “You tell me. I have no idea what you need to say.”
Fury filled his eyes. “I trusted you, Rose! I trusted you to confide in me.”
“I know,” I said, my own anger fading in the face of his.
“And I never suspected for a single moment that you would betray me by helping the very man I was trying to put behind bars. Do you have any idea how badly my reputation would be damaged if word got out?”
“I do.”
“You ran off and did God knows what with him and those . . . those criminals, lying to me about where you were and what you were doing while I was oblivious to it all. I feel like a fool, Rose. An utter fool.”
“I know. I’m sorry. But you’re not a fool, Mason. No one would ever accuse you of that.”
“I don’t know if I can forgive you.” He shook his head, releasing a derisive laugh. “But I love you. Despite it all, I still love you. And that makes me not trust myself.”
I understood. I’d spent the past five nights in my empty bed, trying to imagine myself in his shoes. Truth be told, I wouldn’t have believed him if he’d accepted my duplicity as if it meant nothing. But this still hurt like hades.
And I still needed answers.
“Do you think that J.R. will try to hurt me for what I did?”
He gave a tiny shudder, trying to switch gears. “I’m sure Joe told you this much, but he’s being transferred to the county jail today.”
“And you know that doesn’t mean squat.”
He nodded, looking down at his feet.
“So I’m at risk?”
“Yes.”
“You left me alone at the farmhouse knowing someone could come for me at any time?” I asked in disbelief.
“You haven’t been alone, Rose.” His gaze lifted to meet mine, and the regret and sadness there stole my breath. “You’ve had someone watching you since the moment we left the farmhouse last Friday morning.”
“Joe never told me.”
“Joe doesn’t know.”
“Jed?” The blood rushed from my head when he didn’t respond. “I didn’t know, Mason. I swear. I only found out from Carter right before I came over here.”
“You haven’t seen him?”
“No.” I paused. “How did you know?”
“I called Malcolm.”
My mouth dropped. “You did what?”
“Joe couldn’t get the sheriff’s department to spare a deputy to keep an eye on you. And I don’t trust J.R. Simmons for a minute. Jed was the one who saved you when you were kidnapped. I knew he’d be the best person to watch over you.”
“But you hate Skeeter Malcolm.”
“If I learned one thing last week, it’s that Malcolm will go to great lengths to protect you.” When I started to protest, he said, “Even if I was still out at the farmhouse, I wouldn’t be able to watch over you 24/7, so this is the next best thing.”
“Why would you protect me?”
“I might not be with you right now, but I still love you. Even though I’m angry as hell. Even though I feel utterly betrayed.” He groaned and rubbed his forehead with the back of his hand. “It’s killing me to not be with you, Rose. But I don’t trust you. And without trust, we have nothing.”
I nodded. “I know. And I hope to make it up to you somehow. I want to earn back your trust.”
I wasn’t sure what to do. Leave him alone to wrestle with the pain I’d caused him? Or stay and savor every moment I got with him? But maybe he was right. Maybe this wasn’t the time to force a decision about our future.
“What happens after J.R. gets moved to the county jail?” I asked, purposefully changing the subject.
“The state may move him to their own facility—they’re working on their own case—but for now he’ll stay in the county jail, unless his attorney can get the judge to reconsider granting him bail.”
“Will he?”
Mason sighed. “It’s not outside the realm of possibility.”
The thought sent a shiver down my spine. “Do you think he’ll get out of this?”
“It’ll be hard for him to shake the charges. But stranger things have happened, and there’s no denying J.R. Simmons has a way of making situations turn in his favor.”
“What about Kate and all the files she had on you?”
He paced to the window and lifted one of the wooden slats of the blinds to look across the street. “Joe says he found nothing. I can have you and Neely Kate give statements on what you saw, but I’m not sure that’s in your best interest. Your presence there was legally questionable to say the least, and Kate has moved whatever she had there. We have no way of figuring out where she moved it. It’s a dead end.”