Unconditional
Page 38
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Michelle made a sound. She didn’t know where it had come from, only that it was full of everything she’d been feeling. All her grief and guilt and fear. A sound that ripped from her so hard it hurt.
Allie lay, bloodied and broken in the center of a circle. A blood circle, not a salt circle.
“Wait!” She held up a hand as she dug through the pocket of her jacket and pulled out a bag of salt she’d blessed only the day before according to Lark’s directions.
She spoke softly, through tears as she traced another circle just inside the blood circle. She tried hard not to look at Allie as she did.
No birds sang. There was no sound in that yard and there should have been. The leaves on the trees should have been rustling. There should have been insect sounds, the rustle of small things in the underbrush. But there was nothing.
Once she finished the circle, she spoke the last words of the spell, and the power rushed through her and broke the blood circle with a rush of sticky, sick energy that thankfully disappeared quickly.
What didn’t dissipate though, was the stench of death.
Michelle broke the salt circle. She moved to Allie. Pam approached and put a hand on her shoulder. “This is a crime scene. Remember that.”
It wasn’t like she needed to check a pulse.
There was nothing left in Allie. Her magick, her aura usually so vibrant in Michelle’s othersight, was gone. There was nothing. She’d moved on. She’d been brutalized. Left torn, broken and empty on the ground like garbage.
“I have to call this in. I need all the wolves gone. Michelle, you can stay. But we can’t touch anything else.”
“Before they get here, I’m going through the house one more time to get scents.” Damon paused and then took Michelle’s hand. “I’m sorry, Michelle. We will find justice for this. I promise you.”
She nodded, absently. “Is Gina being protected?”
His expression turned feral. “Yes. At all times.”
Josh watched, saying nothing until Pam stepped away to call it in and get crime-scene folks out.
He took Michelle’s hand, drawing his thumb back and forth across her skin. She stiffened and took her hand back.
“God, beautiful, I’m so sorry. I want to hold you so much. I wish this was different.”
She shook her head hard, once. “It’s not. I need to deal with this. I can’t afford to lose my shit right now. I have to do my job and I can’t if you touch me.”
He nodded. “I understand. I don’t like the idea of leaving you here.”
“You have to. I can’t explain you to the cops. Pam is under enough scrutiny right now. You have to go. But if you’d have my car brought over, I’d appreciate it.”
“That I can do.” He paused. “I love you, Michelle. You’re not alone. No matter what.”
She turned, catching his gaze, and that connection between them clicked into place. She nodded, shoving back all her emotions. She needed to be cold and hard and ruthless right then. She needed to examine that scene with every single one of her senses, and that meant she had no room for guilt, or even love.
Chapter Ten
She pulled up to her apartment and sat in the car for long minutes, unable to bring herself to even move.
Back in Portland, she’d stayed at the scene while it had been processed. They canvassed the neighborhood, but the houses were very far apart so no one claimed to have seen anything. The place they’d found Allie in was supposed to have been empty, the last tenants having left six months before. No one had noticed anything at all.
She searched for the mage energy all around, driving aimlessly after she’d left the scene, but saw nothing.
In the end, nearly on autopilot, she’d gotten on the freeway and headed south. She couldn’t inform Kathy of her child’s death by phone, and she sure as hell didn’t trust Dexter to send anyone over there who’d gently break the news.
So she’d gone straight to Kathy’s once she’d gotten off the freeway. Luckily Allie’s aunt had been there, but still, she’d had to tell a mother that her child was dead. Even with a judicious removal of detail, it was hard to say and even harder for Kathy to hear.
They’d all cried for what seemed like hours, and still, she’d held back a great deal of her grief because she didn’t want any more of a burden on Kathy. Allie’s aunt was able to get Kathy to rest, and though she’d offered a place for Michelle to stay, she’d refused and driven around town for some time before she’d ended up home.
Her phone rang and she saw Josh’s number. Immediately she felt better.
“Hey.”
“Hey yourself, beautiful. Where are you?”
She’d called him halfway to Roseburg to let him know what she was doing. He’d been angry that she’d gone without him, but she’d simply explained Kathy had a right to know as soon as possible and she needed to hear it directly from someone who loved Allie too.
And she needed that time in the car, all by herself, to process—or try to process—all she’d been through in the last week. The time to feel whatever the hell she wanted to without worrying over how anyone else would react.
“I’m getting out of my car now. I’m at my apartment. I’ve been at Kathy’s for the last four hours.” Exhaustion dogged her steps as she headed down the path to her place. The air was clean and crisp. She should have been cold but she just didn’t feel much of anything.
Allie lay, bloodied and broken in the center of a circle. A blood circle, not a salt circle.
“Wait!” She held up a hand as she dug through the pocket of her jacket and pulled out a bag of salt she’d blessed only the day before according to Lark’s directions.
She spoke softly, through tears as she traced another circle just inside the blood circle. She tried hard not to look at Allie as she did.
No birds sang. There was no sound in that yard and there should have been. The leaves on the trees should have been rustling. There should have been insect sounds, the rustle of small things in the underbrush. But there was nothing.
Once she finished the circle, she spoke the last words of the spell, and the power rushed through her and broke the blood circle with a rush of sticky, sick energy that thankfully disappeared quickly.
What didn’t dissipate though, was the stench of death.
Michelle broke the salt circle. She moved to Allie. Pam approached and put a hand on her shoulder. “This is a crime scene. Remember that.”
It wasn’t like she needed to check a pulse.
There was nothing left in Allie. Her magick, her aura usually so vibrant in Michelle’s othersight, was gone. There was nothing. She’d moved on. She’d been brutalized. Left torn, broken and empty on the ground like garbage.
“I have to call this in. I need all the wolves gone. Michelle, you can stay. But we can’t touch anything else.”
“Before they get here, I’m going through the house one more time to get scents.” Damon paused and then took Michelle’s hand. “I’m sorry, Michelle. We will find justice for this. I promise you.”
She nodded, absently. “Is Gina being protected?”
His expression turned feral. “Yes. At all times.”
Josh watched, saying nothing until Pam stepped away to call it in and get crime-scene folks out.
He took Michelle’s hand, drawing his thumb back and forth across her skin. She stiffened and took her hand back.
“God, beautiful, I’m so sorry. I want to hold you so much. I wish this was different.”
She shook her head hard, once. “It’s not. I need to deal with this. I can’t afford to lose my shit right now. I have to do my job and I can’t if you touch me.”
He nodded. “I understand. I don’t like the idea of leaving you here.”
“You have to. I can’t explain you to the cops. Pam is under enough scrutiny right now. You have to go. But if you’d have my car brought over, I’d appreciate it.”
“That I can do.” He paused. “I love you, Michelle. You’re not alone. No matter what.”
She turned, catching his gaze, and that connection between them clicked into place. She nodded, shoving back all her emotions. She needed to be cold and hard and ruthless right then. She needed to examine that scene with every single one of her senses, and that meant she had no room for guilt, or even love.
Chapter Ten
She pulled up to her apartment and sat in the car for long minutes, unable to bring herself to even move.
Back in Portland, she’d stayed at the scene while it had been processed. They canvassed the neighborhood, but the houses were very far apart so no one claimed to have seen anything. The place they’d found Allie in was supposed to have been empty, the last tenants having left six months before. No one had noticed anything at all.
She searched for the mage energy all around, driving aimlessly after she’d left the scene, but saw nothing.
In the end, nearly on autopilot, she’d gotten on the freeway and headed south. She couldn’t inform Kathy of her child’s death by phone, and she sure as hell didn’t trust Dexter to send anyone over there who’d gently break the news.
So she’d gone straight to Kathy’s once she’d gotten off the freeway. Luckily Allie’s aunt had been there, but still, she’d had to tell a mother that her child was dead. Even with a judicious removal of detail, it was hard to say and even harder for Kathy to hear.
They’d all cried for what seemed like hours, and still, she’d held back a great deal of her grief because she didn’t want any more of a burden on Kathy. Allie’s aunt was able to get Kathy to rest, and though she’d offered a place for Michelle to stay, she’d refused and driven around town for some time before she’d ended up home.
Her phone rang and she saw Josh’s number. Immediately she felt better.
“Hey.”
“Hey yourself, beautiful. Where are you?”
She’d called him halfway to Roseburg to let him know what she was doing. He’d been angry that she’d gone without him, but she’d simply explained Kathy had a right to know as soon as possible and she needed to hear it directly from someone who loved Allie too.
And she needed that time in the car, all by herself, to process—or try to process—all she’d been through in the last week. The time to feel whatever the hell she wanted to without worrying over how anyone else would react.
“I’m getting out of my car now. I’m at my apartment. I’ve been at Kathy’s for the last four hours.” Exhaustion dogged her steps as she headed down the path to her place. The air was clean and crisp. She should have been cold but she just didn’t feel much of anything.
