She covered her face with her hands. “God.”
“What is it, Court? Come on, talk to me.”
“I just want her out of my life.”
“I’m sure she’s had similar thoughts about you.”
She pushed her hair back from her tear-stained face. Her blonde locks looked as if she hadn’t brushed them since awakening to a frightening phone call. “I don’t know if I can make you understand this. I really do love Todd. When I got the call that he’d been hurt, I think I realized just how much, because I thought of my life without him anywhere in it and…I couldn’t breathe.”
“Okay.”
“I still care about you so much. I always will. A little part of me will always think I was crazy for messing up and not marrying you, because with you my life would have been secure and stable and…”
“Boring?” he supplied wryly.
“Not boring. Safe. Too safe, I think. But that doesn’t mean I particularly like hearing that my arch enemy is taking trips that I was supposed to take. I know it makes me a selfish bitch. I can’t help it. It seems it’s always about her. Every time Todd and I fight, it’s about her. We split up because of her. And it just never stops.”
“Trust me, I know the feeling.” In fact, it made perfect sense to him. Which was only testament to how screwed up he was. He honestly thought he wouldn’t notice if a Boeing 747 fell out of the sky and landed on his head at the moment. He certainly didn’t think he’d care.
“But when it comes down to it, if you’re not with her, then she’s probably back here to nurse him back to health, and I’m sure he’d be all for it.”
“I don’t know. I don’t have any answers. All I know is if the two of them decide to get back together, unhappy as they were, they both deserve whatever they get.”
She stared at him, probably dismayed by his tone. Exhaustion was starting to overwhelm him, physically and emotionally. Caffeine was going to become a necessity if he wanted to get any work done. He reached out and put an arm around his ex-fiancée’s quivering shoulders. “Come on. I’ll buy you something in the coffee shop.”
She nodded and let him lead her away.
From her hiding place around the corner, Kelsey drew a breath. She supposed she already deserved everything she got from this situation. But the words she’d said to Todd’s mother couldn’t have hurt Evan as much as that biting, bitter “no” he’d just uttered wounded her. She leaned against the wall to keep from collapsing into a boneless heap. Evan and Courtney were disappearing down a hallway now, his arm still around her.
Their being together right now didn’t bother her as much as she’d thought it would. She doubted it was anything more than two hurting people reaching out to each other. Of course, things happened in those situations, as Kelsey and Evan had certainly proven this past week, but…surely not with them. Courtney had her chance. Evan didn’t seem interested and if Courtney wanted Todd, loved Todd, she could damn sure have him. Kelsey certainly wasn’t here to stand in her way.
She’d meant to make one last desperate attempt to catch Evan and explain her thoughtless words. But he obviously wasn’t interested. She didn’t think she’d ever heard him like that before. Not about her.
It was really over. And she couldn’t face the family up on the fourth floor right now, not with her heart bleeding like a war wound. There was only one person she could think of to go to for solace, and Kelsey prayed they hadn’t discharged her yet.
The maternity ward on the third floor was bustling with happy families and nurses in their bright-colored scrubs. Tiny baby wails drifted through the air. Kelsey stopped at the huge window looking into the nursery, where probably a dozen babies were lying in their cribs, some kicking and wriggling, some sleeping. Some wrapped in pink, some in blue. The name tag at the end of one read “Scott” in pink, and it was empty. A tired-looking nurse sitting at a computer at the nurse’s station told her which room Lisa was in.
Kelsey’s last remaining best friend was alone and propped up in bed, surrounded by flowers and balloons, cooing down at the pink bundle in her arms. She looked over when the door clicked shut. “Kelsey!”
“Hey, skinny. Oh, let me see…” She made her way to the bed and leaned over to peek at a perfect little face, ignoring her friend’s incredulous stare.
“Okay, I know you love me, but this is ridiculous.”
“When are they letting you go home?”
“In the morning. I probably could have left today but I finagled another night until my mom gets here.”
“Like you need help, Supermom.”
“I don’t need it, but I certainly won’t turn it down. Remember, Daniel lives in a state of panic during the newborn stage.” Lisa snapped her fingers in Kelsey’s face. “Hey. Look at me. Why are you here?”
Sighing, Kelsey turned away to drag a chair over to the bed. She dropped into it and rubbed her face hard with her hands. “I guess I blew it.”
“What happened?”
“Todd had a wreck last night, a bad one. Sandra called and…”
Understanding slid across Lisa’s expression. “Here you are.”
“Here I am.”
Lisa’s head fell back on her pillow. “Oh, you moron. Buzz the nurse if my blood pressure skyrockets.”
“It was a life-and-death situation and—”
“And what? You could somehow affect which way it went by being here?”
“Sandra asked me to come. She wanted me here. I’m far away from my own parents and she has always been there for me, like another mom.”
“So you’re here for her.”
“Well…yes…”
Lisa’s eyebrows lifted. “But…?”
“I don’t wish death on the man. I was with him for eight years of my life.”
“And he didn’t want you in his anymore, life, death or otherwise. So there.”
Kelsey dropped her head in her hands and rubbed her temples. “I was hoping you’d help me feel better, not worse.”
“You should have known better. Showing up in my damn hospital room when you should still be in Hawaii falling in love with a guy who I predict would never hurt you like that. I’m sorry if I sound coldhearted, but if Daniel had done to me what Todd did to you—”
“You don’t know how you’d feel,” Kelsey spat. “You’ve never been there.”
Lisa leveled her with silent wrath in her gaze. “Fine. Is Todd all right?”
“He’s been awake here and there. They’re optimistic now.”
“So what are you doing here? Go tell him you forgive him and beg him to take you back. Tell him you’ll be his own Florence Nightingale to nurse him back to health.”
“What? No. That’s not what I want.”
“Then you had better go tell that to Evan, and make him believe it, and pray he forgives you. God, Kelsey, I’m about to drop the ‘f’ bomb in front of my newborn daughter. And it’ll be all your fault.”
“It’s pointless.”
“You have to try. You have to bite the bullet on this one. This is your screw-up.”
“What is it, Court? Come on, talk to me.”
“I just want her out of my life.”
“I’m sure she’s had similar thoughts about you.”
She pushed her hair back from her tear-stained face. Her blonde locks looked as if she hadn’t brushed them since awakening to a frightening phone call. “I don’t know if I can make you understand this. I really do love Todd. When I got the call that he’d been hurt, I think I realized just how much, because I thought of my life without him anywhere in it and…I couldn’t breathe.”
“Okay.”
“I still care about you so much. I always will. A little part of me will always think I was crazy for messing up and not marrying you, because with you my life would have been secure and stable and…”
“Boring?” he supplied wryly.
“Not boring. Safe. Too safe, I think. But that doesn’t mean I particularly like hearing that my arch enemy is taking trips that I was supposed to take. I know it makes me a selfish bitch. I can’t help it. It seems it’s always about her. Every time Todd and I fight, it’s about her. We split up because of her. And it just never stops.”
“Trust me, I know the feeling.” In fact, it made perfect sense to him. Which was only testament to how screwed up he was. He honestly thought he wouldn’t notice if a Boeing 747 fell out of the sky and landed on his head at the moment. He certainly didn’t think he’d care.
“But when it comes down to it, if you’re not with her, then she’s probably back here to nurse him back to health, and I’m sure he’d be all for it.”
“I don’t know. I don’t have any answers. All I know is if the two of them decide to get back together, unhappy as they were, they both deserve whatever they get.”
She stared at him, probably dismayed by his tone. Exhaustion was starting to overwhelm him, physically and emotionally. Caffeine was going to become a necessity if he wanted to get any work done. He reached out and put an arm around his ex-fiancée’s quivering shoulders. “Come on. I’ll buy you something in the coffee shop.”
She nodded and let him lead her away.
From her hiding place around the corner, Kelsey drew a breath. She supposed she already deserved everything she got from this situation. But the words she’d said to Todd’s mother couldn’t have hurt Evan as much as that biting, bitter “no” he’d just uttered wounded her. She leaned against the wall to keep from collapsing into a boneless heap. Evan and Courtney were disappearing down a hallway now, his arm still around her.
Their being together right now didn’t bother her as much as she’d thought it would. She doubted it was anything more than two hurting people reaching out to each other. Of course, things happened in those situations, as Kelsey and Evan had certainly proven this past week, but…surely not with them. Courtney had her chance. Evan didn’t seem interested and if Courtney wanted Todd, loved Todd, she could damn sure have him. Kelsey certainly wasn’t here to stand in her way.
She’d meant to make one last desperate attempt to catch Evan and explain her thoughtless words. But he obviously wasn’t interested. She didn’t think she’d ever heard him like that before. Not about her.
It was really over. And she couldn’t face the family up on the fourth floor right now, not with her heart bleeding like a war wound. There was only one person she could think of to go to for solace, and Kelsey prayed they hadn’t discharged her yet.
The maternity ward on the third floor was bustling with happy families and nurses in their bright-colored scrubs. Tiny baby wails drifted through the air. Kelsey stopped at the huge window looking into the nursery, where probably a dozen babies were lying in their cribs, some kicking and wriggling, some sleeping. Some wrapped in pink, some in blue. The name tag at the end of one read “Scott” in pink, and it was empty. A tired-looking nurse sitting at a computer at the nurse’s station told her which room Lisa was in.
Kelsey’s last remaining best friend was alone and propped up in bed, surrounded by flowers and balloons, cooing down at the pink bundle in her arms. She looked over when the door clicked shut. “Kelsey!”
“Hey, skinny. Oh, let me see…” She made her way to the bed and leaned over to peek at a perfect little face, ignoring her friend’s incredulous stare.
“Okay, I know you love me, but this is ridiculous.”
“When are they letting you go home?”
“In the morning. I probably could have left today but I finagled another night until my mom gets here.”
“Like you need help, Supermom.”
“I don’t need it, but I certainly won’t turn it down. Remember, Daniel lives in a state of panic during the newborn stage.” Lisa snapped her fingers in Kelsey’s face. “Hey. Look at me. Why are you here?”
Sighing, Kelsey turned away to drag a chair over to the bed. She dropped into it and rubbed her face hard with her hands. “I guess I blew it.”
“What happened?”
“Todd had a wreck last night, a bad one. Sandra called and…”
Understanding slid across Lisa’s expression. “Here you are.”
“Here I am.”
Lisa’s head fell back on her pillow. “Oh, you moron. Buzz the nurse if my blood pressure skyrockets.”
“It was a life-and-death situation and—”
“And what? You could somehow affect which way it went by being here?”
“Sandra asked me to come. She wanted me here. I’m far away from my own parents and she has always been there for me, like another mom.”
“So you’re here for her.”
“Well…yes…”
Lisa’s eyebrows lifted. “But…?”
“I don’t wish death on the man. I was with him for eight years of my life.”
“And he didn’t want you in his anymore, life, death or otherwise. So there.”
Kelsey dropped her head in her hands and rubbed her temples. “I was hoping you’d help me feel better, not worse.”
“You should have known better. Showing up in my damn hospital room when you should still be in Hawaii falling in love with a guy who I predict would never hurt you like that. I’m sorry if I sound coldhearted, but if Daniel had done to me what Todd did to you—”
“You don’t know how you’d feel,” Kelsey spat. “You’ve never been there.”
Lisa leveled her with silent wrath in her gaze. “Fine. Is Todd all right?”
“He’s been awake here and there. They’re optimistic now.”
“So what are you doing here? Go tell him you forgive him and beg him to take you back. Tell him you’ll be his own Florence Nightingale to nurse him back to health.”
“What? No. That’s not what I want.”
“Then you had better go tell that to Evan, and make him believe it, and pray he forgives you. God, Kelsey, I’m about to drop the ‘f’ bomb in front of my newborn daughter. And it’ll be all your fault.”
“It’s pointless.”
“You have to try. You have to bite the bullet on this one. This is your screw-up.”
