When He Was Bad
Page 47
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She shrugged. Not really.
Jackies eyes closed. Tell me you at least showered.
Uh . . . yesterday.
Oh! Jackie stormed out into the hallway. I need She-wolves! We have an emergency.
Arent you blowing this out of
Shut up!
She glanced at Jackies already protruding stomach and groused, Im so glad you and Paul decided to breed.
Dont make me kill you. Because I will kill you.
For the next thirty minutes, the She-wolves and one jackal subjected Irene to a litany of physical abuse including a shower, forcing her unruly hair into a lethally tight bun, slapping what she considered useless makeup on her face, and forcing her into a white sheath dress shed never buy for herself.
Standing outside the closed doors leading to the ballroom and the waiting groom and guests, Irene glanced down at the bracelet Carrie placed on her wrist while Jackie put a matching necklace around her neck.
This is nice.
Van got this for you, Carrie stated on an exasperated sigh. Dont you remember?
Was that the day he got me the Zenith Z-171 PC?
Jackie laughed and said, You owe me twenty bucks, Van Holtz. I told you she liked that computer more than the forty thousand dollars worth of jewelry your brother got her.
What can jewelry do? Do you realize that PC is portable? And its battery powered with backlighting!
I dont know why he bothers, Carrie muttered before stepping away and looking Irene over. She shrugged. I guess its the best we can do.
Gee, thanks.
Dont listen to her. Jackie slapped a small bouquet of red roses and babys breath in her hands. You look wonderful.
A string quartet began to play and the She-wolves started walking into the ballroom single file.
This is such a waste of time.
Irene, suck it up.
I have things to do!
What? And I dont? Now stop whining and in ten seconds follow me down that aisle or so help me God, I will kick your lily-white ass!
Jackie turned around and the pair paused, realizing they had the attention of all the guests.
Forcing a smile, Jackie whispered, Im so getting you for this later.
Then she was off, slowly walking down the aisle, while Irene impatiently and quickly counted to ten. She followed after her friend and several times almost passed her. The third time, Jackie slammed her elbow into her gut, which effectively slowed Irene down.
When she finally reached Holtzs side, he had tears streaming down his face, but sheknew it wasnt from the beauty of the moment.
Stop laughing at me, she whispered.
Could you look more annoyed? He laughed, keeping his head down while the priest or reverend or whatever droned about why the hell they were there.
There are a myriad of things I could be doing at this moment. Useful, life-changing things. This is a waste of time.
Excuse me? The priest/reverend/whatever snapped. Do you mind?
Sorry, Irene said and then added, But feel free to pick up the pace.
Which got a snort out of Holtz.
She lasted a good five minutes before her foot started tapping.
Cut it out, Holtz growled, although she had the feeling he was still laughing.
Im bored, she whispered back. Too much longer and Im going to start taking things apart. And you know how you hate when I do that.
Speaking of which, what happened to my Mercedes?
What are you talking about?
I came home yesterday and it was nothing but burnt metal.
Oh. That. Yes, I wanted to see how engines worked. I walked away for a few minutes to get a glass of orange juice and when I came back . . . boom.
Boom?
The priest/reverend/whatever cleared his throat.
Sorry, Holtz mumbled.
A few more lines about commitment and love and Holtz snarled under his breath, What do you mean boom?
I was merely trying to see if I could get more speed out of it.
How much speed?
She shrugged. I dont know. Ive been toying with this idea of being able to travel from one country to the next in a car. I figure if you make it fast enough, it might hydroplane.
All right, thats it. Stay away from my cars.
But you have so many.
Thats not the point!
Excuse me! the priest/reverend/whatever snapped. This is a sacred and time-honored ceremony, so do you think you two could act like it and shut the holy hell up?
Annoyed, Irene tapped at the spot on her wrist where her watch would be if those vicious She-wolves hadnt taken it off her. Or you could speed it up. Ive got things to do and your rambling is boring me!
Fine! the priest/reverend/whatever yelled. Do you? he asked Holtz.
Yup!
And you?
Yes, yes.
Ring?
Here. Holtz placed the white-gold band next to the sizable diamond hed insisted on getting her.
Jackies eyes closed. Tell me you at least showered.
Uh . . . yesterday.
Oh! Jackie stormed out into the hallway. I need She-wolves! We have an emergency.
Arent you blowing this out of
Shut up!
She glanced at Jackies already protruding stomach and groused, Im so glad you and Paul decided to breed.
Dont make me kill you. Because I will kill you.
For the next thirty minutes, the She-wolves and one jackal subjected Irene to a litany of physical abuse including a shower, forcing her unruly hair into a lethally tight bun, slapping what she considered useless makeup on her face, and forcing her into a white sheath dress shed never buy for herself.
Standing outside the closed doors leading to the ballroom and the waiting groom and guests, Irene glanced down at the bracelet Carrie placed on her wrist while Jackie put a matching necklace around her neck.
This is nice.
Van got this for you, Carrie stated on an exasperated sigh. Dont you remember?
Was that the day he got me the Zenith Z-171 PC?
Jackie laughed and said, You owe me twenty bucks, Van Holtz. I told you she liked that computer more than the forty thousand dollars worth of jewelry your brother got her.
What can jewelry do? Do you realize that PC is portable? And its battery powered with backlighting!
I dont know why he bothers, Carrie muttered before stepping away and looking Irene over. She shrugged. I guess its the best we can do.
Gee, thanks.
Dont listen to her. Jackie slapped a small bouquet of red roses and babys breath in her hands. You look wonderful.
A string quartet began to play and the She-wolves started walking into the ballroom single file.
This is such a waste of time.
Irene, suck it up.
I have things to do!
What? And I dont? Now stop whining and in ten seconds follow me down that aisle or so help me God, I will kick your lily-white ass!
Jackie turned around and the pair paused, realizing they had the attention of all the guests.
Forcing a smile, Jackie whispered, Im so getting you for this later.
Then she was off, slowly walking down the aisle, while Irene impatiently and quickly counted to ten. She followed after her friend and several times almost passed her. The third time, Jackie slammed her elbow into her gut, which effectively slowed Irene down.
When she finally reached Holtzs side, he had tears streaming down his face, but sheknew it wasnt from the beauty of the moment.
Stop laughing at me, she whispered.
Could you look more annoyed? He laughed, keeping his head down while the priest or reverend or whatever droned about why the hell they were there.
There are a myriad of things I could be doing at this moment. Useful, life-changing things. This is a waste of time.
Excuse me? The priest/reverend/whatever snapped. Do you mind?
Sorry, Irene said and then added, But feel free to pick up the pace.
Which got a snort out of Holtz.
She lasted a good five minutes before her foot started tapping.
Cut it out, Holtz growled, although she had the feeling he was still laughing.
Im bored, she whispered back. Too much longer and Im going to start taking things apart. And you know how you hate when I do that.
Speaking of which, what happened to my Mercedes?
What are you talking about?
I came home yesterday and it was nothing but burnt metal.
Oh. That. Yes, I wanted to see how engines worked. I walked away for a few minutes to get a glass of orange juice and when I came back . . . boom.
Boom?
The priest/reverend/whatever cleared his throat.
Sorry, Holtz mumbled.
A few more lines about commitment and love and Holtz snarled under his breath, What do you mean boom?
I was merely trying to see if I could get more speed out of it.
How much speed?
She shrugged. I dont know. Ive been toying with this idea of being able to travel from one country to the next in a car. I figure if you make it fast enough, it might hydroplane.
All right, thats it. Stay away from my cars.
But you have so many.
Thats not the point!
Excuse me! the priest/reverend/whatever snapped. This is a sacred and time-honored ceremony, so do you think you two could act like it and shut the holy hell up?
Annoyed, Irene tapped at the spot on her wrist where her watch would be if those vicious She-wolves hadnt taken it off her. Or you could speed it up. Ive got things to do and your rambling is boring me!
Fine! the priest/reverend/whatever yelled. Do you? he asked Holtz.
Yup!
And you?
Yes, yes.
Ring?
Here. Holtz placed the white-gold band next to the sizable diamond hed insisted on getting her.