Where Darkness Lies
Page 46
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“Hendrix.”
That has my eyes flicking open. “Dimi . . .”
“I need to see him, no matter what you think, no matter what he wants. I have to see him to get this closure.”
“I don’t know if I trust that you won’t hurt him.”
“Neither do I,” he says, his voice heavy with regret. “But I can’t ever be truly complete until I see him.”
I close my eyes again, sighing deeply. “Would you hear him out? Would you let him tell his side? Or would you just kill him?”
“For the sake of not losing you, Jess, I’d hear him out.”
“Can you promise me that?”
He pulls me tighter. “A simple yes or no won’t be enough. So I’m goin’ to put this the best way I can. You’ve been through a lot, possibly even worse than what I lived through, so you understand something about me that no one has ever understood. You understand fear, pain, hesitation and loss. You understand how hard it is to give someone your trust, and you understand that you cherish the few you do trust because they’re likely to be all you’ll ever have. I can’t promise you not to have a reaction, Jess, because unless I’m a hundred percent sure, I don’t give promises. But I can promise you this—I will give you what you need, I will hear him out, because you’re one of the few people I’ve trusted in such a long time and I’m not going to give that up.”
I feel a tear trickle down my cheek and I struggle to take a calming breath. He’s told me everything I’ve needed to hear for so long. His finger slides up and swipes the tear. I don’t even know how he guessed it was there.
“I can call him,” I whisper. “I can organize something.”
I feel him exhale. “Thank you.”
“But if you hurt him, Dimi . . . I don’t . . . I don’t—”
“I know,” he cuts me off. “I know, Jess.”
I nod. “You’re right, I do understand a lot of things about you because I’m the same, so I understand trusting very few people. I’m giving you my trust, Dimitri. Please don’t crush it. I don’t give it back easily.”
“Noted,” he murmurs.
I hope I’m making the right choice.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Jess
Hey, it’s me,” I say, tucking my legs underneath me on the seat.
“Jessie,” Hendrix murmurs like he’s just woken up.
“Did I wake you?”
He yawns. “No.”
“Such a liar.” I laugh weakly.
“Somethin’ wrong?” he asks.
I stare out at the beautiful row of trees at the base of the yard. It’s a cool morning and I’m enjoying the fresh air that’s washing through and tickling my skin.
“Dimitri found out we saw each other.”
“Shit,” he says, his voice filling with emotion. “Jessie, are you hurt? Did he hurt you?”
“No, I’m okay.”
“What happened?”
I swallow and take a deep breath. “He wants to see you, Hendrix.”
He sighs. “Is that a good idea?”
I honestly don’t know.
“He promised to hear you out . . . it’s the best I’ve got. I can’t tell you if he’ll attack or if he won’t but he needs this as much as you do.”
“Give me a bit of time to think on it, Jessie, yeah?”
I nod. “Yeah, okay.”
“Look, Indi is beside me tugging the fuck outta my pants because she wants to speak with you.”
“Your pants?” I ask with my brows raised.
“Got no shirt on,” he chuckles.
“Such a rebel she is,” I smile. “Throw her on.”
“I’ll call you on this number in a few days, Jessie.”
“Okay.”
“Puttin’ Indi on.”
God, here goes.
Dimitri
I lean against the doorframe and watch her curled up on the chair outside. She’s got the phone pressed to her ear and she’s smiling. A real beautiful smile. I can’t bring myself to interrupt. Seeing her like this, it warms something inside me.
“Hey, Indi,” she says.
I tilt my head and listen. She slaps a hand over her mouth and smothers a giggle.
“I know,” she begins before she’s clearly cut off. A giggle finally breaks free and the sound is goddamned beautiful.
“Indigo, shut your pie hole for a second . . .”
I grin, I can’t help it.
“I am not ‘banging’ the enemy . . .”
She laughs again.
“Okay, well, I am, but . . .”
I feel my grin get bigger.
“INDI!” she shouts. “Do you hear this laughter?”
I stop smiling and listen closer, taking a step out.
“Yes, that’s real laughter. He makes me laugh. Laughter isn’t something I have a whole lot of, but he gives it to me.”
Silence.
“Yes,” she whispers. “I think . . . I think he could make me happy.”
Something burns in my chest. Something deep and consuming.
“I’ll call you again soon, I swear.”
She smiles and swipes a tear from her cheek.
“Sure, okay.”
She waits a second.
“Hey,” she says and I feel my body stiffen. Is it him she’s talking to now?
“Okay,” she begins and then stops. “Yeah, okay. Thank you, Hendrix. I . . . I miss you.”
That has my eyes flicking open. “Dimi . . .”
“I need to see him, no matter what you think, no matter what he wants. I have to see him to get this closure.”
“I don’t know if I trust that you won’t hurt him.”
“Neither do I,” he says, his voice heavy with regret. “But I can’t ever be truly complete until I see him.”
I close my eyes again, sighing deeply. “Would you hear him out? Would you let him tell his side? Or would you just kill him?”
“For the sake of not losing you, Jess, I’d hear him out.”
“Can you promise me that?”
He pulls me tighter. “A simple yes or no won’t be enough. So I’m goin’ to put this the best way I can. You’ve been through a lot, possibly even worse than what I lived through, so you understand something about me that no one has ever understood. You understand fear, pain, hesitation and loss. You understand how hard it is to give someone your trust, and you understand that you cherish the few you do trust because they’re likely to be all you’ll ever have. I can’t promise you not to have a reaction, Jess, because unless I’m a hundred percent sure, I don’t give promises. But I can promise you this—I will give you what you need, I will hear him out, because you’re one of the few people I’ve trusted in such a long time and I’m not going to give that up.”
I feel a tear trickle down my cheek and I struggle to take a calming breath. He’s told me everything I’ve needed to hear for so long. His finger slides up and swipes the tear. I don’t even know how he guessed it was there.
“I can call him,” I whisper. “I can organize something.”
I feel him exhale. “Thank you.”
“But if you hurt him, Dimi . . . I don’t . . . I don’t—”
“I know,” he cuts me off. “I know, Jess.”
I nod. “You’re right, I do understand a lot of things about you because I’m the same, so I understand trusting very few people. I’m giving you my trust, Dimitri. Please don’t crush it. I don’t give it back easily.”
“Noted,” he murmurs.
I hope I’m making the right choice.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Jess
Hey, it’s me,” I say, tucking my legs underneath me on the seat.
“Jessie,” Hendrix murmurs like he’s just woken up.
“Did I wake you?”
He yawns. “No.”
“Such a liar.” I laugh weakly.
“Somethin’ wrong?” he asks.
I stare out at the beautiful row of trees at the base of the yard. It’s a cool morning and I’m enjoying the fresh air that’s washing through and tickling my skin.
“Dimitri found out we saw each other.”
“Shit,” he says, his voice filling with emotion. “Jessie, are you hurt? Did he hurt you?”
“No, I’m okay.”
“What happened?”
I swallow and take a deep breath. “He wants to see you, Hendrix.”
He sighs. “Is that a good idea?”
I honestly don’t know.
“He promised to hear you out . . . it’s the best I’ve got. I can’t tell you if he’ll attack or if he won’t but he needs this as much as you do.”
“Give me a bit of time to think on it, Jessie, yeah?”
I nod. “Yeah, okay.”
“Look, Indi is beside me tugging the fuck outta my pants because she wants to speak with you.”
“Your pants?” I ask with my brows raised.
“Got no shirt on,” he chuckles.
“Such a rebel she is,” I smile. “Throw her on.”
“I’ll call you on this number in a few days, Jessie.”
“Okay.”
“Puttin’ Indi on.”
God, here goes.
Dimitri
I lean against the doorframe and watch her curled up on the chair outside. She’s got the phone pressed to her ear and she’s smiling. A real beautiful smile. I can’t bring myself to interrupt. Seeing her like this, it warms something inside me.
“Hey, Indi,” she says.
I tilt my head and listen. She slaps a hand over her mouth and smothers a giggle.
“I know,” she begins before she’s clearly cut off. A giggle finally breaks free and the sound is goddamned beautiful.
“Indigo, shut your pie hole for a second . . .”
I grin, I can’t help it.
“I am not ‘banging’ the enemy . . .”
She laughs again.
“Okay, well, I am, but . . .”
I feel my grin get bigger.
“INDI!” she shouts. “Do you hear this laughter?”
I stop smiling and listen closer, taking a step out.
“Yes, that’s real laughter. He makes me laugh. Laughter isn’t something I have a whole lot of, but he gives it to me.”
Silence.
“Yes,” she whispers. “I think . . . I think he could make me happy.”
Something burns in my chest. Something deep and consuming.
“I’ll call you again soon, I swear.”
She smiles and swipes a tear from her cheek.
“Sure, okay.”
She waits a second.
“Hey,” she says and I feel my body stiffen. Is it him she’s talking to now?
“Okay,” she begins and then stops. “Yeah, okay. Thank you, Hendrix. I . . . I miss you.”