Where We Belong
Page 6
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That woman. Fuck me.
Hearing Chase’s worrying cries still going on in the other room, I scramble to my feet and pull up my shorts, my heart racing as I cross the hall and enter his bedroom.
Mia is clutching him to her, kissing his cheek and trying to settle him. “I think he had a night terror. He’s shaking, Ben, and his little heart is pounding so fast.”
I rub his back and brush his dark hair off his forehead.
He’s still crying, and I can see how worked up he is. I can hear it in his labored breathing.
What the hell do kids this little dream about that scares them like this? Clowns? Fucking deranged cartoon animals?
“Let me take him,” I tell her, pulling him into my arms and against my chest, dropping my head next to his.
Chase fists my shirt and rubs his face against mine, his crying growing a little softer.
“Mommy?”
Lifting my head, I spot Nolan in the doorway.
He rubs at his eye, peering at us both and looking too exhausted to stand.
“Hey, come here.” Mia goes to him, kneeling down to cup his face. “You okay?”
“Is Chasey going to sleep with you?”
Mia looks back at me expectantly, a smile pulling at her mouth.
She knows why she’s smiling. I sure as shit know why she’s smiling.
My boys are cock-blocking me. Again, because this definitely isn’t the first time. I swear they plan this shit out at dinner.
I look down at Chase, his eyes wide with alarm and his little body still trembling with confused fear. No fucking way is he passing out any time soon, not looking like this. And Nolan, hell, if he knows Chase is lying in bed with us, he’ll fight his way into that room swinging every damn sword he owns.
Jerking my head, I walk toward the two of them. “Come on. But we’re sleeping, Nolan. We aren’t playing in there.”
Nobody is playing in there. Not anymore.
“Yesss,” he whispers, sounding a bit excited.
Mia rubs my back as we head into our bedroom.
She and Nolan climb on the bed first after she tugs on a tiny pair of pajama shorts and a night shirt.
I lay Chase next to Nolan and sink down beside him, keeping him close to me as I roll on my side to face everyone.
Everyone. All three pairs of eyes open and fixated on me.
“Nolan,” I warn, and immediately he shuts his eyes and rolls over, putting his back to me. I wrap my arm around Chase, trying to soothe him as Mia watches me from over the top of Nolan’s head.
Her eyes full of love and warmth, sucking me in just a little bit deeper.
“Sorry,” she mouths, smiling a bit.
I shrug.
“I love you.”
Heat blooms in the center of my chest.
I stare back at her, suddenly not caring at all that our night got interrupted, only feeling content and fucking whole being this close to Mia and our boys.
“Love you, Angel,” I mouth back, hearing the buzz of my phone on the night stand behind me, a call I’m going to ignore no matter who the fuck it is.
It can wait. This, right here, nothing is more important than this.
Everything else can wait.
Mia
“HOLY SHHH . . .”
“Tessa!”
Pulling the boys against me, wrapping an arm around each of their heads and doing my best to cover both pairs of innocent ears, I glare at the burgundy dressing room door my foul-mouthed best friend stands behind, glaring even harder when the door cracks open and a green eye peers at me.
Do you mind?
Tessa opens the door a bit wider and looks between the two boys, not appearing all too apologetic. “My bad. But it’s not like they haven’t heard it before.”
“Doesn’t matter. Just wait until you and Luke have a kid and they start repeating everything you say.”
I lower my hands, allowing the boys to move around in front of me again as I remain seated on the cushioned bench.
Her eyes widen a bit. She seems to tense up. “Let me get changed,” she murmurs.
The door shuts. I hear the soft rustling of clothes and the clink of a metal hanger.
I immediately regret bringing up the kids topic. Tessa always gets quiet when I mention her and Luke starting a family, and if I pry she shuts down even more, changing the conversation or just leaving the room entirely. I think the whole thing worries her. She lost Luke three years ago because she didn’t think he wanted kids. Even though they’re solid now and married, I think a part of her still fears something tearing them apart.
After several minutes, her dressing room door opens and she steps out, holding the lingerie she went in to try on—a plum-colored, lace-trim babydoll.
She sits down next to me, crossing her one leg over the other and clutching the garment.
“I’m buying this. My boobs look enormous in it.”
I let out an exhaustive breath, looking from Nolan, who is giggling and covering his mouth, to Tessa, who is also giggling, poking him in the stomach.
I’d scold her for that if Ben wasn’t so keen on talking about my breasts when Nolan is still in earshot.
He’s heard every slang term in the English vocabulary. He’s even shared some with his friends at school.
We’ve been called in to speak with the teacher twice now. Ben couldn’t act more proud sitting in on those meetings, puffing his chest out, looking at his son like he’s raising some sort of breast connoisseur.
I’m usually the one doing all the apologizing and swearing up and down certain words will never be repeated.
Tessa nudges me with her elbow, leaning in to whisper. “So, are you as deliciously sore as I am? Luke’s been on me like flies on shit.”
Crossing my arms below my chest, I lean back against the wall, sulking. “No. We haven’t done it at all.”
God, I miss sex with Ben. Delicious, mind-numbing, earth-shattering sex with Ben.
“What? They were off for two days. What have you two been doing?”
I motion at Chase and Nolan as they follow each other around the small dressing room area, Chase trying to catch his big brother with his arms outstretched, and Nolan, laughing and letting him get real close before he darts away.
“Oh,” Tessa mumbles, leaning back next to me, both of us watching the boys. “Well, what about after they go to bed? That’s your usual playtime, isn’t it?”
“Not lately. Chase keeps waking up within a couple minutes of us putting him down, and Nolan always hears him. Then he’s up and wanting to sleep with us too. Ben wants me to ignore it, but I can’t. I’ve tried. I hate hearing Chase cry like that. And poor Nolan. Ben yelled at him last night ‘cause he was sick of getting interrupted and Nolan stuck his little fingers underneath our bedroom door and cried until we let him in.”
“Jesus.”
“Yeah, I’ve tried praying about it. That’s not working either. I don’t know what to do. If Ben doesn’t take me soon I think he might go crazy. I caught him researching the damages of sex withdrawal yesterday while the boys were eating lunch.”
Tessa chuckles. “Oh, my God. I’m so glad I know this information. I’m going to tease the hell out of him now.”
“Please don’t,” I groan. “I’m sure he’s already getting it from Luke.”
“Exactly. We can both play off his misery.”
Hearing Chase’s worrying cries still going on in the other room, I scramble to my feet and pull up my shorts, my heart racing as I cross the hall and enter his bedroom.
Mia is clutching him to her, kissing his cheek and trying to settle him. “I think he had a night terror. He’s shaking, Ben, and his little heart is pounding so fast.”
I rub his back and brush his dark hair off his forehead.
He’s still crying, and I can see how worked up he is. I can hear it in his labored breathing.
What the hell do kids this little dream about that scares them like this? Clowns? Fucking deranged cartoon animals?
“Let me take him,” I tell her, pulling him into my arms and against my chest, dropping my head next to his.
Chase fists my shirt and rubs his face against mine, his crying growing a little softer.
“Mommy?”
Lifting my head, I spot Nolan in the doorway.
He rubs at his eye, peering at us both and looking too exhausted to stand.
“Hey, come here.” Mia goes to him, kneeling down to cup his face. “You okay?”
“Is Chasey going to sleep with you?”
Mia looks back at me expectantly, a smile pulling at her mouth.
She knows why she’s smiling. I sure as shit know why she’s smiling.
My boys are cock-blocking me. Again, because this definitely isn’t the first time. I swear they plan this shit out at dinner.
I look down at Chase, his eyes wide with alarm and his little body still trembling with confused fear. No fucking way is he passing out any time soon, not looking like this. And Nolan, hell, if he knows Chase is lying in bed with us, he’ll fight his way into that room swinging every damn sword he owns.
Jerking my head, I walk toward the two of them. “Come on. But we’re sleeping, Nolan. We aren’t playing in there.”
Nobody is playing in there. Not anymore.
“Yesss,” he whispers, sounding a bit excited.
Mia rubs my back as we head into our bedroom.
She and Nolan climb on the bed first after she tugs on a tiny pair of pajama shorts and a night shirt.
I lay Chase next to Nolan and sink down beside him, keeping him close to me as I roll on my side to face everyone.
Everyone. All three pairs of eyes open and fixated on me.
“Nolan,” I warn, and immediately he shuts his eyes and rolls over, putting his back to me. I wrap my arm around Chase, trying to soothe him as Mia watches me from over the top of Nolan’s head.
Her eyes full of love and warmth, sucking me in just a little bit deeper.
“Sorry,” she mouths, smiling a bit.
I shrug.
“I love you.”
Heat blooms in the center of my chest.
I stare back at her, suddenly not caring at all that our night got interrupted, only feeling content and fucking whole being this close to Mia and our boys.
“Love you, Angel,” I mouth back, hearing the buzz of my phone on the night stand behind me, a call I’m going to ignore no matter who the fuck it is.
It can wait. This, right here, nothing is more important than this.
Everything else can wait.
Mia
“HOLY SHHH . . .”
“Tessa!”
Pulling the boys against me, wrapping an arm around each of their heads and doing my best to cover both pairs of innocent ears, I glare at the burgundy dressing room door my foul-mouthed best friend stands behind, glaring even harder when the door cracks open and a green eye peers at me.
Do you mind?
Tessa opens the door a bit wider and looks between the two boys, not appearing all too apologetic. “My bad. But it’s not like they haven’t heard it before.”
“Doesn’t matter. Just wait until you and Luke have a kid and they start repeating everything you say.”
I lower my hands, allowing the boys to move around in front of me again as I remain seated on the cushioned bench.
Her eyes widen a bit. She seems to tense up. “Let me get changed,” she murmurs.
The door shuts. I hear the soft rustling of clothes and the clink of a metal hanger.
I immediately regret bringing up the kids topic. Tessa always gets quiet when I mention her and Luke starting a family, and if I pry she shuts down even more, changing the conversation or just leaving the room entirely. I think the whole thing worries her. She lost Luke three years ago because she didn’t think he wanted kids. Even though they’re solid now and married, I think a part of her still fears something tearing them apart.
After several minutes, her dressing room door opens and she steps out, holding the lingerie she went in to try on—a plum-colored, lace-trim babydoll.
She sits down next to me, crossing her one leg over the other and clutching the garment.
“I’m buying this. My boobs look enormous in it.”
I let out an exhaustive breath, looking from Nolan, who is giggling and covering his mouth, to Tessa, who is also giggling, poking him in the stomach.
I’d scold her for that if Ben wasn’t so keen on talking about my breasts when Nolan is still in earshot.
He’s heard every slang term in the English vocabulary. He’s even shared some with his friends at school.
We’ve been called in to speak with the teacher twice now. Ben couldn’t act more proud sitting in on those meetings, puffing his chest out, looking at his son like he’s raising some sort of breast connoisseur.
I’m usually the one doing all the apologizing and swearing up and down certain words will never be repeated.
Tessa nudges me with her elbow, leaning in to whisper. “So, are you as deliciously sore as I am? Luke’s been on me like flies on shit.”
Crossing my arms below my chest, I lean back against the wall, sulking. “No. We haven’t done it at all.”
God, I miss sex with Ben. Delicious, mind-numbing, earth-shattering sex with Ben.
“What? They were off for two days. What have you two been doing?”
I motion at Chase and Nolan as they follow each other around the small dressing room area, Chase trying to catch his big brother with his arms outstretched, and Nolan, laughing and letting him get real close before he darts away.
“Oh,” Tessa mumbles, leaning back next to me, both of us watching the boys. “Well, what about after they go to bed? That’s your usual playtime, isn’t it?”
“Not lately. Chase keeps waking up within a couple minutes of us putting him down, and Nolan always hears him. Then he’s up and wanting to sleep with us too. Ben wants me to ignore it, but I can’t. I’ve tried. I hate hearing Chase cry like that. And poor Nolan. Ben yelled at him last night ‘cause he was sick of getting interrupted and Nolan stuck his little fingers underneath our bedroom door and cried until we let him in.”
“Jesus.”
“Yeah, I’ve tried praying about it. That’s not working either. I don’t know what to do. If Ben doesn’t take me soon I think he might go crazy. I caught him researching the damages of sex withdrawal yesterday while the boys were eating lunch.”
Tessa chuckles. “Oh, my God. I’m so glad I know this information. I’m going to tease the hell out of him now.”
“Please don’t,” I groan. “I’m sure he’s already getting it from Luke.”
“Exactly. We can both play off his misery.”