Wicked
Page 88

I could feel the hold on my control snapping, one fragile strain at a time. I started to pull away, but he let go of my hands and clasped my upper arms. "Ren . . ."
"I'm still here." He dipped his head, his eyes meeting mine. "You haven't lost me."
"But what if—"
"Sweetness, you can't hold your life back on a bunch of what ifs. Who the hell knows what could happen? Either one of us could walk out of this house and get struck by lightning, or both of us could live until we're ninety. Tomorrow we could die or we could come back here. We don't know." Sliding his hands up to my cheeks, he lowered his forehead to mine. "But we're both here right now and that's all that matters. The right now."
"The right now?" My heart raced.
"Yeah. Right now. We're both here. That's all that matters, and I can't promise that I'm not going anywhere, but I'm going to try damn hard not to. That is one thing I'm going to tell you to trust."
A hailstorm of emotion rose up in me, like the thickest barricade finally cracking open. My face crumpled, and I couldn't stop it, didn't even try. Tears streamed down my face, and Ren made this raw sound that came from deep within him as he gathered me against his chest, tucking my head under his as he held me tight, whispering words I didn't understand but were soothing nonetheless.
I didn't know what did it—Ren saying he wasn't going anywhere or the fact that he couldn't promise that he wouldn't. He hadn't even tried, but he was here, and maybe that was what set me off.
Burrowing my face against his damp chest, I let it out. Like a plug being pulled on an overflowing tub, it was slow and choking at first, as if it would never end, then it was  gone fast with a trickle of tears and a stuttered breath.
Time had passed and when I finally lifted my head, he smiled at me, one dimple appearing. He swept his thumbs over my cheeks, erasing what was left of the tears. "You're even pretty when you cry," he said.
A laugh escaped me, throaty and flimsy. "Now you're definitely lying. That was ugly crying."
"Nothing about you is ugly."
There was a lot of ugliness in me and I think he knew that, deep down, because he carried the same, but I appreciated the kindness he doled out like candy on Halloween. On the spur of the moment, I stretched up and kissed him. It was a chaste kiss, a benediction and a thank you, nothing more than a brush of my lips against his, but there was a spark between us that lit up every cell in my body, and I knew he was just as affected. A slight tremor coursed through the hands that held my cheeks. I lowered myself onto the soles of my feet and stared into his eyes as a different kind of storm sieged me.
The heat flushing through my body told me that I wanted him. Badly. My mood whiplashed me, but there was nothing I needed more than him. Surprisingly, it had nothing to do with what David had said earlier about us finding someone to spend the evening with in case we didn't survive the following night. Yeah, what I was feeling . . . it had been there before David's less than motivational speech, under my skin, building around my heart. Wetting my lips, I trailed my hands down to his hard chest, and he must've read what I wanted in my eyes.
"Ivy," he all but groaned.
I repeated his words from earlier. "Don't let me go."
His eyes flared as he stared at me intently. "Never."
Chapter Twenty
Ren didn't let me go. Oh no, he did the exact opposite. Gripping my hips, he lifted me clean off the floor, and instinct drove me to wrap my legs around his lean hips. One of his strong, grounding hands cupped the back of my neck, guiding my lips to his. There was an artless, questioning quality to the kiss at first, gentle and sweet before it changed, becoming needy and demanding. I felt the sweep of his tongue all through my body.
His hands roamed to my bottom, rocking me against his hips, pressing his arousal against mine. I moaned into his mouth, and in the back of my head, I really hoped Tink didn't wander out to investigate what was going on in here. But then Ren started walking, all the while laying claim to my mouth and so much more than that.
"Bed. Now," he growled.
I clutched his shoulders. "Agreed."
Ren's mouth moved over mine once more as he carried me to my bedroom. I reached out blindly behind me, finding the doorknob and wrenching it open. Once inside, I tore my mouth free. "Let me shut the door."
He raised an eyebrow, but closed the door with his booted foot instead of turning me so I could. Then he walked over to my bed and dropped me. I landed with a bounce and a giggle.
He kicked off his shoes and socks and was on me before I could take my next breath. My shirt came off in a heartbeat, and then my bra. His hands were everywhere, roaming up my stomach, caressing the hard and aching peaks of my breasts, and then back down, to the button and zipper on my jeans.
Ren had superpowers when it came to stripping my clothes off. Somehow, within mere seconds, he had my jeans off and his hand was under the band of my panties. I moaned and raised my hips as he slipped a finger inside me. I was already so hot and so ready that when he started to pump his finger in and out, I almost toppled right over the edge, but I wanted more. I wanted to feel him inside me.
Reaching between us, I rubbed his hard length through his jeans, and his answering groan turned me on even more. I caught the buckle of his belt and tugged it free. I tackled the zipper, but it took longer than it should have. Ren was thoroughly distracting with his hand between my thighs and the trail of kisses he blazed down my chest to my breasts.