Chapter One
Tegan ran. Heart bursting with the joy of the forest, with the elation of wolf, her paws hit the warm earth, claws scrabbling to keep balance as she rounded a curve and saw the edge of the land that was safe to be wolf in.
Collapsing at the base of a large tree, she stretched to rub her spine along the bark, a growl of pleasure darting from her muzzle. Sighing, she put her head on her paws and closed her eyes.
“Hey. You’re late.” He smiled up at her, blue eyes twinkling, short blond hair set off against sun-kissed skin.
Startled, she froze a minute. Watched as he sliced mushrooms with competent speed.
In three steps she was close enough to touch him. Feel the vibrant warmth at the back of his neck, the straw-colored softness of his hair tickling her fingers.
“Lucas.” His name tore from her painfully. “What?”
He put the cutting board heaped with vegetables aside and gave her a quick kiss.
“That’s all I can do.” Turning back to the sink, he began to peel potatoes. “God, I miss you. But you know what makes me saddest?”
“What are you doing here?” Impotent rage flooded her. “You’re dead!”
He put the potato down and dried his hands on a nearby towel. “I’m dead. But not here.” Warm fingers brushed her temple. “Or here.” Another fleeting brush over her heart. “In your memories and your heart I’m still alive. Our love lives on in your memories. But just because I’m dead doesn’t mean you have to be. I’ve been telling you that. Why haven’t you listened?”
She shook her head, tears sprang to her eyes and the pain of his loss welled up like a familiar ache. “The other dreams…were you trying to tell me?”
He nodded. “Okay the deal is, I can’t be here long. So listen to me, please, honey.
You’re wasting your life. Damn it, you’re wasting your heart. A heart I know has room to love again. I’d be so ashamed if my death was the reason you never moved on to love another man.”
“I…there’s only you. Why, Lucas? Why did you leave me?”
He closed his eyes and the room dimmed a bit. “I didn’t. It wasn’t like that. But there’s no more time. Tee, it’s coming and you have got to be ready. Lots of stuff. Big stuff. You can’t deal with it, may not survive it if you don’t let me go and move forward.”
She felt her consciousness begin to rise, fought it, moved toward him. He took her hands in his, kissing her fingertips. Her desperation faded into resignation and then calm flowed over her.
“I have to go. I’ll always be a part of you, Tegan. But you need to move on. It’s time.”
And she was alone in the forest. But the faint scent of him still rested on the air and for the first time in four years, when she walked back into the house wearing her human skin, she felt whole again.
“You know what, Lex? I think my time-out is over. I want to move back to my own house.” Tegan Warden continued to clean her weapon as she spoke to her brother, the Enforcer of Cascadia Pack.
“This isn’t a punishment for God’s sake! Tegan, we know Pellini is out there and looking for a way to hurt one of us. It’s not safe for you to be back at your house on your own.” Lex spoke through clenched teeth.
“Lex, by all that is holy, if I put coal in your ass it would turn into a diamond!
Loosen up! I’m twenty-eight years old. In case it hadn’t occurred to you, I’m a f**king werewolf guard on your damned Enforcer team. I can take care of myself.” She put her weapon back into the case and locked it.
Her sister-in-law, Nina, leaned against the counter and drank her coffee, watching them both.
“I think you should do what Lex says on this, Tee.” Cade came into the room and shoved Nina aside playfully, getting himself a cup of coffee.
“Of course you do, your ass is as tight as his. Look, I like being on my own. I only lived here because after Lucas…well it was a place to come and it was part of the job.
But now I have my own place. It’s filled with my own things. It’s where my bed is, and my sheets and my plates. No offense but I don’t want to live my life by committee anymore.”
“How’s she ever gonna get any action if she’s here anyway? God, you guys, she’s been alone for four years. It’s time she gets back out there and starts dating. She deserves a real life and you making her stay here isn’t going to keep her twelve years old.” Tegan couldn’t risk looking at Nina just then. Nina’s intuitiveness and insight were scary sometimes.
“It’ll just keep her from ending up dead!” Lex’s jaw clenched and unclenched.
Tegan stood and shook her head. “I’m not going to die if I’m not under your nose every minute of the day. I appreciate your concern, Lex. I love that you all want to keep me safe and protected but I don’t want that. I want to be on my own.”
“To have hot monkey love!” Nina joked.
Tegan rolled her eyes at her sister-in-law, suppressing a smile. “If I choose, yes.”
“Tegan, what’s gotten into you?” Lex didn’t wait for an answer as he turned back to his wife. “I can’t believe you’re taking her side on this, Nina.” He began to pace.
“There aren’t sides here, Lex.” Nina reached out and touched his shoulder and he stopped, leaning into her. “Let her go. It’s just twenty miles.”
Lex threw his hands up in the air. “Fine! No one listens to me. I’m only the Second and all. What would I know about security?”
Tegan ran. Heart bursting with the joy of the forest, with the elation of wolf, her paws hit the warm earth, claws scrabbling to keep balance as she rounded a curve and saw the edge of the land that was safe to be wolf in.
Collapsing at the base of a large tree, she stretched to rub her spine along the bark, a growl of pleasure darting from her muzzle. Sighing, she put her head on her paws and closed her eyes.
“Hey. You’re late.” He smiled up at her, blue eyes twinkling, short blond hair set off against sun-kissed skin.
Startled, she froze a minute. Watched as he sliced mushrooms with competent speed.
In three steps she was close enough to touch him. Feel the vibrant warmth at the back of his neck, the straw-colored softness of his hair tickling her fingers.
“Lucas.” His name tore from her painfully. “What?”
He put the cutting board heaped with vegetables aside and gave her a quick kiss.
“That’s all I can do.” Turning back to the sink, he began to peel potatoes. “God, I miss you. But you know what makes me saddest?”
“What are you doing here?” Impotent rage flooded her. “You’re dead!”
He put the potato down and dried his hands on a nearby towel. “I’m dead. But not here.” Warm fingers brushed her temple. “Or here.” Another fleeting brush over her heart. “In your memories and your heart I’m still alive. Our love lives on in your memories. But just because I’m dead doesn’t mean you have to be. I’ve been telling you that. Why haven’t you listened?”
She shook her head, tears sprang to her eyes and the pain of his loss welled up like a familiar ache. “The other dreams…were you trying to tell me?”
He nodded. “Okay the deal is, I can’t be here long. So listen to me, please, honey.
You’re wasting your life. Damn it, you’re wasting your heart. A heart I know has room to love again. I’d be so ashamed if my death was the reason you never moved on to love another man.”
“I…there’s only you. Why, Lucas? Why did you leave me?”
He closed his eyes and the room dimmed a bit. “I didn’t. It wasn’t like that. But there’s no more time. Tee, it’s coming and you have got to be ready. Lots of stuff. Big stuff. You can’t deal with it, may not survive it if you don’t let me go and move forward.”
She felt her consciousness begin to rise, fought it, moved toward him. He took her hands in his, kissing her fingertips. Her desperation faded into resignation and then calm flowed over her.
“I have to go. I’ll always be a part of you, Tegan. But you need to move on. It’s time.”
And she was alone in the forest. But the faint scent of him still rested on the air and for the first time in four years, when she walked back into the house wearing her human skin, she felt whole again.
“You know what, Lex? I think my time-out is over. I want to move back to my own house.” Tegan Warden continued to clean her weapon as she spoke to her brother, the Enforcer of Cascadia Pack.
“This isn’t a punishment for God’s sake! Tegan, we know Pellini is out there and looking for a way to hurt one of us. It’s not safe for you to be back at your house on your own.” Lex spoke through clenched teeth.
“Lex, by all that is holy, if I put coal in your ass it would turn into a diamond!
Loosen up! I’m twenty-eight years old. In case it hadn’t occurred to you, I’m a f**king werewolf guard on your damned Enforcer team. I can take care of myself.” She put her weapon back into the case and locked it.
Her sister-in-law, Nina, leaned against the counter and drank her coffee, watching them both.
“I think you should do what Lex says on this, Tee.” Cade came into the room and shoved Nina aside playfully, getting himself a cup of coffee.
“Of course you do, your ass is as tight as his. Look, I like being on my own. I only lived here because after Lucas…well it was a place to come and it was part of the job.
But now I have my own place. It’s filled with my own things. It’s where my bed is, and my sheets and my plates. No offense but I don’t want to live my life by committee anymore.”
“How’s she ever gonna get any action if she’s here anyway? God, you guys, she’s been alone for four years. It’s time she gets back out there and starts dating. She deserves a real life and you making her stay here isn’t going to keep her twelve years old.” Tegan couldn’t risk looking at Nina just then. Nina’s intuitiveness and insight were scary sometimes.
“It’ll just keep her from ending up dead!” Lex’s jaw clenched and unclenched.
Tegan stood and shook her head. “I’m not going to die if I’m not under your nose every minute of the day. I appreciate your concern, Lex. I love that you all want to keep me safe and protected but I don’t want that. I want to be on my own.”
“To have hot monkey love!” Nina joked.
Tegan rolled her eyes at her sister-in-law, suppressing a smile. “If I choose, yes.”
“Tegan, what’s gotten into you?” Lex didn’t wait for an answer as he turned back to his wife. “I can’t believe you’re taking her side on this, Nina.” He began to pace.
“There aren’t sides here, Lex.” Nina reached out and touched his shoulder and he stopped, leaning into her. “Let her go. It’s just twenty miles.”
Lex threw his hands up in the air. “Fine! No one listens to me. I’m only the Second and all. What would I know about security?”
