Come A Little Bit Closer
Page 45
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Every night, he brought her the most delicious, nutritious dinner any new mother had ever eaten, and she was too tired—and too grateful that she didn’t have to use up what was left of her energy—to turn him or the yummy food away. She was also too polite to turn him away after he was kind enough to give so much of his busy schedule to her and the baby.
And in truth, it wasn’t the apartment or the food that she resented.
No. It was something far more insidious, far more potentially dangerous that had her lying in bed at night tossing and turning when she should have been trying to squeeze in sleep while her daughter finally dozed.
It would have been easier, and so much safer, to hate him. Even to fear him. But everything had changed with the birth of her daughter. And she could no longer deny that in the strange in-between of trying to push him out of her life when he would come to the coffee shop every day, up through these nightly meals together in her cozy apartment, the two of them had become friends.
And she wouldn’t ever forget the hours when she’d been giving birth to Leah. He’d been there beside her every single second, never letting go of her hand, and it had been instinctive for her to let him hold the newborn.
Graham’s gentleness had been so evident. So sweet. So pure. And everything she’d believed to be true about him, everything she’d tried to tell herself was real, was turned on its ear, until she wasn’t sure about anything anymore.
Nothing except for how safe she felt with him...and that he was the only other person on earth that she could trust with her daughter’s life.
These past weeks, she didn’t even try to deny that she looked forward to his visits, especially since he didn’t poke at her past and she didn’t poke at his. All of it might have continued to be okay—the food, the friendship, the fact that he adored her baby—were it not for one other issue. One even scarier than actually becoming friends.
She was attracted to him. More and more with every passing day. And she wasn’t young enough, or blind enough, not to see that he was attracted to her, too.
Neither of them were each other’s types. And yet, it didn’t seem to matter that she’d always had an unfortunate predilection for rocker types, or that she was the polar opposite of the Amazonian blondes that she’d seen pictured with him the couple of times she hadn’t been able to stop herself from going to the computer to look him up.
She opened the front door and Graham’s face immediately lit up when he saw that the baby was awake. He wasn’t the only one happy, as Leah reached for him with a little gurgle of joy. But he would never take the baby without Jo’s permission, and after he’d put the food down on her kitchen island, something bittersweet tugged at her as she made everyone happy by placing her soft bundle into his arms.
Her heart softened more and more with every one of the nonsense noises the powerful man in the expensive suit made to the happy baby as Jo laid out dinner on the small dining table. By the time she’d opened a bottle of beer for him and poured a glass of milk for herself, Leah had fallen asleep in his arms.
Jo reached for the baby, but Graham said, “Eat while it’s hot. I’ll just go tuck her in.”
She knew she should be drawing thicker lines between him and her daughter. But she couldn’t justify it, not when he clearly felt nothing but adoration for her. She’d never had a man in her life like that, one who loved her unconditionally. Jo couldn’t take that away from Leah.
She asked him about his day during dinner and he made her laugh with stories about the people in his office, the investors he dealt with. He asked about her day, and she told him about her trip to the park so Leah could sit and wobble in the sand and watch the bigger kids play with big wonder-filled eyes. He asked her next about the online horticulture classes she was taking, but even as he got her to share more of herself with him, by what felt like tacit agreement, neither of them ever spoke about family, about mothers or fathers or brothers or sisters.
By the end of dinner, Jo’s eyelids were falling, and even though she insisted on helping Graham clean up the table, when he gave her a brand new Encyclopedia of Flowers, she was thrilled to sink back into the couch to devour the pictures and flower descriptions, and dream of the garden store she would open one day. Finally, her exhaustion got the better of her.
Love was unmasked on Graham’s face as he looked at Jo, fast asleep on the couch, her legs tucked up under her small, curvy body, her beautiful face resting on her hands. And when the baby started crying, he immediately went to the fridge to pull out a bottle of breast milk and got water heating on the stove for it before heading back into the nursery for the little girl he was absolutely crazy about.
Making shushing sounds against the baby’s soft skin and stroking the cap of dark hair that so beautifully matched her mother’s—apart from the pink streaks—he came with her into the kitchen just as the bottle was warm enough.
As the little girl greedily drank her fill, she stared up at him with big blue eyes. He told Leah what he was so afraid to tell her mother.
“I love you.” The baby’s little hand lifted to wrap around one of his fingers and he cuddled her closer, whispering, “I will never let anyone hurt you. Ever.”
When the baby had finished eating, he rocked her gently in his arms, the lullaby he softly sang quickly soothing her back to sleep.
Jo had woken as Graham brought her daughter back into the living room, but it had been so nice, just for once, to stay in that quiet and serene half-sleep while he fed Leah. She’d been watching the two of them from under her lashes, and even though she knew how much he loved her little girl, hearing the sweet words of love fall from his lips, and then the lullaby, was a shock.
Even more so was the shock of just how badly she wanted to hear those three words for herself.
In her secret heart of hearts she knew she’d been falling for him for much longer than she had hated him. But tonight, as she watched him give his heart to the one person who meant absolutely everything to her, she not only fell the rest of the way in love...she realized she’d never had a chance of keeping her heart safe from him.
For the first time, instead of trying yet again to hide from her feelings, she decided it was long past time to act on them. Graham had helped her in a dozen special ways with both her pregnancy and the baby. Now she would do whatever she could to help him.
She had enough scars of her own to recognize how deep his ran. Not only had she never been able to forget his expression when he’d spoken of his sister that one time, but when she’d searched his name on the Internet, she’d learned of his painful loss.
And in truth, it wasn’t the apartment or the food that she resented.
No. It was something far more insidious, far more potentially dangerous that had her lying in bed at night tossing and turning when she should have been trying to squeeze in sleep while her daughter finally dozed.
It would have been easier, and so much safer, to hate him. Even to fear him. But everything had changed with the birth of her daughter. And she could no longer deny that in the strange in-between of trying to push him out of her life when he would come to the coffee shop every day, up through these nightly meals together in her cozy apartment, the two of them had become friends.
And she wouldn’t ever forget the hours when she’d been giving birth to Leah. He’d been there beside her every single second, never letting go of her hand, and it had been instinctive for her to let him hold the newborn.
Graham’s gentleness had been so evident. So sweet. So pure. And everything she’d believed to be true about him, everything she’d tried to tell herself was real, was turned on its ear, until she wasn’t sure about anything anymore.
Nothing except for how safe she felt with him...and that he was the only other person on earth that she could trust with her daughter’s life.
These past weeks, she didn’t even try to deny that she looked forward to his visits, especially since he didn’t poke at her past and she didn’t poke at his. All of it might have continued to be okay—the food, the friendship, the fact that he adored her baby—were it not for one other issue. One even scarier than actually becoming friends.
She was attracted to him. More and more with every passing day. And she wasn’t young enough, or blind enough, not to see that he was attracted to her, too.
Neither of them were each other’s types. And yet, it didn’t seem to matter that she’d always had an unfortunate predilection for rocker types, or that she was the polar opposite of the Amazonian blondes that she’d seen pictured with him the couple of times she hadn’t been able to stop herself from going to the computer to look him up.
She opened the front door and Graham’s face immediately lit up when he saw that the baby was awake. He wasn’t the only one happy, as Leah reached for him with a little gurgle of joy. But he would never take the baby without Jo’s permission, and after he’d put the food down on her kitchen island, something bittersweet tugged at her as she made everyone happy by placing her soft bundle into his arms.
Her heart softened more and more with every one of the nonsense noises the powerful man in the expensive suit made to the happy baby as Jo laid out dinner on the small dining table. By the time she’d opened a bottle of beer for him and poured a glass of milk for herself, Leah had fallen asleep in his arms.
Jo reached for the baby, but Graham said, “Eat while it’s hot. I’ll just go tuck her in.”
She knew she should be drawing thicker lines between him and her daughter. But she couldn’t justify it, not when he clearly felt nothing but adoration for her. She’d never had a man in her life like that, one who loved her unconditionally. Jo couldn’t take that away from Leah.
She asked him about his day during dinner and he made her laugh with stories about the people in his office, the investors he dealt with. He asked about her day, and she told him about her trip to the park so Leah could sit and wobble in the sand and watch the bigger kids play with big wonder-filled eyes. He asked her next about the online horticulture classes she was taking, but even as he got her to share more of herself with him, by what felt like tacit agreement, neither of them ever spoke about family, about mothers or fathers or brothers or sisters.
By the end of dinner, Jo’s eyelids were falling, and even though she insisted on helping Graham clean up the table, when he gave her a brand new Encyclopedia of Flowers, she was thrilled to sink back into the couch to devour the pictures and flower descriptions, and dream of the garden store she would open one day. Finally, her exhaustion got the better of her.
Love was unmasked on Graham’s face as he looked at Jo, fast asleep on the couch, her legs tucked up under her small, curvy body, her beautiful face resting on her hands. And when the baby started crying, he immediately went to the fridge to pull out a bottle of breast milk and got water heating on the stove for it before heading back into the nursery for the little girl he was absolutely crazy about.
Making shushing sounds against the baby’s soft skin and stroking the cap of dark hair that so beautifully matched her mother’s—apart from the pink streaks—he came with her into the kitchen just as the bottle was warm enough.
As the little girl greedily drank her fill, she stared up at him with big blue eyes. He told Leah what he was so afraid to tell her mother.
“I love you.” The baby’s little hand lifted to wrap around one of his fingers and he cuddled her closer, whispering, “I will never let anyone hurt you. Ever.”
When the baby had finished eating, he rocked her gently in his arms, the lullaby he softly sang quickly soothing her back to sleep.
Jo had woken as Graham brought her daughter back into the living room, but it had been so nice, just for once, to stay in that quiet and serene half-sleep while he fed Leah. She’d been watching the two of them from under her lashes, and even though she knew how much he loved her little girl, hearing the sweet words of love fall from his lips, and then the lullaby, was a shock.
Even more so was the shock of just how badly she wanted to hear those three words for herself.
In her secret heart of hearts she knew she’d been falling for him for much longer than she had hated him. But tonight, as she watched him give his heart to the one person who meant absolutely everything to her, she not only fell the rest of the way in love...she realized she’d never had a chance of keeping her heart safe from him.
For the first time, instead of trying yet again to hide from her feelings, she decided it was long past time to act on them. Graham had helped her in a dozen special ways with both her pregnancy and the baby. Now she would do whatever she could to help him.
She had enough scars of her own to recognize how deep his ran. Not only had she never been able to forget his expression when he’d spoken of his sister that one time, but when she’d searched his name on the Internet, she’d learned of his painful loss.
