Craving Absolution
Page 17
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I heard Callie and Grease come in the front door as he leaned down to pull one of my nipples into his mouth, and the pressure of trying to stay silent while he pulled and tugged with his teeth created an intensity that I had no hope of controlling. I ran my fingernails up his back as he switched to the other nipple, and as soon as he let it pop out of his mouth, I pushed his head away from my body so I could scoot down enough to reach his boxer briefs.
“In a hurry?” he asked jokingly, breathing heavily.
“Are you complaining?”
“Fuck no. Take ’em off.”
We laughed quietly as we scrambled with the last pieces of clothing keeping us apart, still snickering as we tore into the box of condoms Cody had bought earlier in the day, finally growing serious as he lay down on his back and pulled me on top of him.
“Ride me,” he rasped, his hands moving from my hips to my throat and back again. “Hard and fast, Ladybug.”
I nodded once before reaching down to position him. This I could handle. Sex between us was fantastic; it was all the other stuff that had me worried. I steadily pressed against him, feeling my muscles inside adapt to his size, but I wasn’t quite ready for him so I only made it halfway down on the first stroke. I didn’t want to say anything, knowing from experience that within two more passes I’d be wet enough for things to feel great, but Cody must have noticed because he grabbed my hips and stopped me before I could drop down a second time.
“Fuck, I’m sorry,” he said, letting go with one hand to put two fingers in his mouth. “I’ll get you ready.”
I jolted as his slick fingers swept between my legs, rolling around my clit in slow circles as if he wasn’t in any kind of hurry. I was quiet as I watched what he was doing to me, and it only took seconds before I was beyond ready.
“Now,” I mumbled frantically, reaching back down to position him. “Please.”
He dislodged his cock and slid his fingers into me once before a low sound of approval came from his throat, then he pulled his hand away so I had room to maneuver.
Once again I positioned him and dropped down, this time taking him to the hilt in one long glide. We both moaned louder than we should have at the sensation, and it wasn’t long before he was staring at my breasts as I bounced above him.
“Son of a bitch.” He groaned, one of his hands dropping to my clit so his thumb could rub gently, matching the rhythm of my movements. It took me a while to come, it always did, but he kept up the pace and didn’t give up until I was coming apart above him as he watched me. As soon as I was done, he used both hands to pull me down as his hips thrust up off the bed, his jaw clenching, nostrils flaring, and a quiet grunt leaving his throat when he came.
We had to make a very uncomfortable trip to the bathroom, hearing Callie and Grease’s low murmurs from her room as we passed it, but soon we crawled back into bed together, all embarrassment forgotten in exchange for exhaustion. He pulled me so that I lay on top of him, and I listened to his heartbeat and breathing slow as he fell asleep, my stomach a mass of nerves.
If we did this—if we tried to make it work and became a couple—I’d eventually screw it up. I knew with certainty that for one reason or another I wouldn’t be able to keep him. What made it even worse was that I wouldn’t be able to keep them either. Cody’s family were the only real family I’d ever known, and I was risking losing them in order to have him.
Falling in with Cody was like playing with a fire that could burn my family’s house to the ground, yet I continued to move closer and closer to the flames.
Chapter 7
Farrah
Callie and I quit our jobs at the salon, which made my anxiety skyrocket, but I had little time to think about it as we packed up the apartments and left for Eugene, Oregon, five days later.
It was amazing how little we were leaving behind, especially me, who’d lived in Sacramento for as long as I could remember. Leaving the city was actually the least of my concerns, though. I was glad to be making a clean break from all of it, both the memories and the people. I didn’t plan to ever go back.
Grease must have talked to Callie, because she’d come to me in the middle of packing up the kitchen to let me know that they decided I could pay a third of the moving expenses. She reasoned that I really had very little to move in comparison to her, Will, and Gram, so she couldn’t let me pay half. It galled her to do it, her body was stiff and her jaw tight as she told me, but there was compassion in her eyes. She understood me in a way that no one else ever would, and even though it killed her to do it, she’d conceded.
Grease and Cody pulled strings with some people they knew up north—they seemed to know everyone—so by the time we got there, Gram and I had apartments in the same complex just a few doors away from each other. It was comforting to know that she would be close by when everything else seemed to be changing at the speed of light. Grease had rented a newer house in a subdivision a few blocks away for Callie and Will, and both Callie and I had cried when we’d finally finished unpacking and it was time for them to go home.
It was the end of an era. I’d lived with Callie, or practically lived with her, since I was sixteen years old, and the thought of living without her was scary as hell. We’d held each other up for so long; it was heartbreaking that she no longer needed me for that. The hardest part, though, was saying good-bye to Will that night. He’d come home as a newborn to our little apartment, and there had never been a day that I hadn’t changed one of his diapers or shared a cup of Cheerios with him.
“In a hurry?” he asked jokingly, breathing heavily.
“Are you complaining?”
“Fuck no. Take ’em off.”
We laughed quietly as we scrambled with the last pieces of clothing keeping us apart, still snickering as we tore into the box of condoms Cody had bought earlier in the day, finally growing serious as he lay down on his back and pulled me on top of him.
“Ride me,” he rasped, his hands moving from my hips to my throat and back again. “Hard and fast, Ladybug.”
I nodded once before reaching down to position him. This I could handle. Sex between us was fantastic; it was all the other stuff that had me worried. I steadily pressed against him, feeling my muscles inside adapt to his size, but I wasn’t quite ready for him so I only made it halfway down on the first stroke. I didn’t want to say anything, knowing from experience that within two more passes I’d be wet enough for things to feel great, but Cody must have noticed because he grabbed my hips and stopped me before I could drop down a second time.
“Fuck, I’m sorry,” he said, letting go with one hand to put two fingers in his mouth. “I’ll get you ready.”
I jolted as his slick fingers swept between my legs, rolling around my clit in slow circles as if he wasn’t in any kind of hurry. I was quiet as I watched what he was doing to me, and it only took seconds before I was beyond ready.
“Now,” I mumbled frantically, reaching back down to position him. “Please.”
He dislodged his cock and slid his fingers into me once before a low sound of approval came from his throat, then he pulled his hand away so I had room to maneuver.
Once again I positioned him and dropped down, this time taking him to the hilt in one long glide. We both moaned louder than we should have at the sensation, and it wasn’t long before he was staring at my breasts as I bounced above him.
“Son of a bitch.” He groaned, one of his hands dropping to my clit so his thumb could rub gently, matching the rhythm of my movements. It took me a while to come, it always did, but he kept up the pace and didn’t give up until I was coming apart above him as he watched me. As soon as I was done, he used both hands to pull me down as his hips thrust up off the bed, his jaw clenching, nostrils flaring, and a quiet grunt leaving his throat when he came.
We had to make a very uncomfortable trip to the bathroom, hearing Callie and Grease’s low murmurs from her room as we passed it, but soon we crawled back into bed together, all embarrassment forgotten in exchange for exhaustion. He pulled me so that I lay on top of him, and I listened to his heartbeat and breathing slow as he fell asleep, my stomach a mass of nerves.
If we did this—if we tried to make it work and became a couple—I’d eventually screw it up. I knew with certainty that for one reason or another I wouldn’t be able to keep him. What made it even worse was that I wouldn’t be able to keep them either. Cody’s family were the only real family I’d ever known, and I was risking losing them in order to have him.
Falling in with Cody was like playing with a fire that could burn my family’s house to the ground, yet I continued to move closer and closer to the flames.
Chapter 7
Farrah
Callie and I quit our jobs at the salon, which made my anxiety skyrocket, but I had little time to think about it as we packed up the apartments and left for Eugene, Oregon, five days later.
It was amazing how little we were leaving behind, especially me, who’d lived in Sacramento for as long as I could remember. Leaving the city was actually the least of my concerns, though. I was glad to be making a clean break from all of it, both the memories and the people. I didn’t plan to ever go back.
Grease must have talked to Callie, because she’d come to me in the middle of packing up the kitchen to let me know that they decided I could pay a third of the moving expenses. She reasoned that I really had very little to move in comparison to her, Will, and Gram, so she couldn’t let me pay half. It galled her to do it, her body was stiff and her jaw tight as she told me, but there was compassion in her eyes. She understood me in a way that no one else ever would, and even though it killed her to do it, she’d conceded.
Grease and Cody pulled strings with some people they knew up north—they seemed to know everyone—so by the time we got there, Gram and I had apartments in the same complex just a few doors away from each other. It was comforting to know that she would be close by when everything else seemed to be changing at the speed of light. Grease had rented a newer house in a subdivision a few blocks away for Callie and Will, and both Callie and I had cried when we’d finally finished unpacking and it was time for them to go home.
It was the end of an era. I’d lived with Callie, or practically lived with her, since I was sixteen years old, and the thought of living without her was scary as hell. We’d held each other up for so long; it was heartbreaking that she no longer needed me for that. The hardest part, though, was saying good-bye to Will that night. He’d come home as a newborn to our little apartment, and there had never been a day that I hadn’t changed one of his diapers or shared a cup of Cheerios with him.
