Craving Constellations
Page 24

“You run and take my baby with you, but it’s not because of your pop who was a fuckin’ hit man. And it’s not because of the club. What the fuck is it, Brenna? You’re too good for me? Didn’t want your baby growing up with a grease monkey for a Daddy? Got a problem with the color of my skin?” He was raising his voice now and was glowering down at me.
“N-no,” I stuttered. I was totally shocked that he thought I saw him that way, and I couldn’t get the words out to interrupt him.
“You were good, but I’ve had better. Those little noises you make? Damn. But that timid act you did? Not gonna lie. That shit was annoying. You almost made up for it with that sweet fuckin’ pussy you’ve got, but now that that fucker has been in that shit? I doubt it’s sweet anymore—”
He was on a roll, but I was fucking done, so I cut him off by slapping him across his face. My chest felt like it was breaking open, and I couldn’t pull enough air into my lungs. The best night of my life had been one of many mediocre ones for him. One of many—that was what I was. This was why I’d left. He wanted to know why I didn’t look back for five years? Then, I’d tell him, and he could choke on it.
“You want to know why I left?” My voice was wobbling, and I worked hard to control it. “I left because I was crazy about you, and I didn’t want to watch you fuck around. I left because I never wanted to hear that garbage you just spewed all over me.”
He raised his eyebrows at me in surprise.
“I left because I never wanted to watch you get hurt. I never wanted to visit you in prison. I never wanted to have you come home, smelling like a chick I saw at the club.”
He started to interrupt, and I raised my hand to stop him.
“I was crazy about you, and you never said anything beyond that night. You never gave any indication you wanted more than that. I wasn’t going to come back and have you tuck me away in some house while you did whatever the fuck you wanted. I didn’t want you to hurt me.” I chuckled humorlessly and wiped the few tears that had made their way down my face. “But I guess it doesn’t matter now, does it? You’ve got a wife, and I’m stuck here. I left you and stayed away because I would rather be beaten to a pulp by Tony again than have you look at me and talk to me the way you just did, like I was nothing but an annoyance.”
“Brenna—” His voice rang with remorse. He looked like he had gotten the wind knocked out of him. He looked sorry.
But I was done. “I’m going to bed. Lock up when you leave.” I headed toward my room and Trix. I just wanted this day to be over with. I was exhausted and upset, and I just needed to hold my girl for a while.
I got dressed quickly in shorts and a T-shirt and climbed under the covers with Trix, wrapping my arms around her. I tried to hear if Dragon had left, but I didn’t have the energy to get up and check. If he’d left, he would make sure everything was locked up tightly. I was almost asleep when I heard someone in the hallway, and I looked up as he walked into the room. He walked around the bed, and I had to twist my body in order to keep him in my sight.
“Stayin’ here tonight.” He grabbed his shirt by the back of the neck and pulled it off, giving me a glimpse of his broad tattoo-covered chest in the moonlight.
I was too tired to argue or wake Trix up. Honestly, part of me was kind of glad that Trix and I weren’t alone. I decided to just give up and deal with things in the morning. When I heard his jeans hit the floor and felt him slide in beside me, my body tensed. He spooned my back and wrapped his arms around Trix and me, pulling us in close. I tried to stay rigid, but the warmth against my back had me relaxing all too soon.
As soon as he felt me relax against him, he whispered in my ear, “Lied. Best I’ve ever had.” Then, he kissed my temple.
I eventually heard his breathing even out and felt his body go heavy.
The man had a wife. I knew this. I’d met her, but it didn’t seem to matter. He was lying with his arms wrapped so close around me, snoring softly, and I couldn’t help but feel glad that he was there. I was so confused. I had been running for so long that I didn’t know what to do with myself now. Did I want to stop running? I hadn’t felt so secure or at home in five years, but I wasn’t sure that I wanted to be an old lady. I had the same fears that had plagued me five years ago when I found out I was pregnant. I didn’t know if raising Trix here was what I wanted to do, but I couldn’t take her away from Dragon now. Did he expect what he’d said to me to just change everything? That we’d start where we had left off the last time I saw him?
My mind was racing. In my head, I reminded myself that he was taken, but I couldn’t get over the feeling that he had always been mine.
It was hours before I fell asleep.
I woke up to a rough hand rubbing back and forth across the tattoo covering my lower stomach. The white wall I was facing didn’t look familiar, but it only took a few seconds for me to realize where I was and who was lying behind me. I leaned up on one elbow, brushing my hair out of my face, and turned my head to look at the man behind me. Mornings had never been my best time of the day, and I blamed that on the sleepy smile I sent in his direction. His hair was a mess, and his eyes were adorably sleepy.
I had seen him asleep before, five years ago, but never when he had just woken up. After our night all those years ago, I had left while he was sleeping to get something to drink and brush my teeth, fully intending to climb back into bed with him. The boys and their toys never woke up early after a party, and I was glad to have some extra time with him before we acted like strangers. But when I was scrambling to grab my toothbrush out of the bag in the backseat of my Bug, my pop and some of the boys pulled into the forecourt, and the opportunity for a lazy morning had vanished.