Den of Sorrows
Page 29
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She felt her eyes fill with tears. No one had ever cherished her the way Lucian had. No one had ever made her feel so incredibly necessary, as though life would not go on if she did not exist in the world.
“Even if we were not bonded, my life would not go on if you were not in this world,” Lucian said, having heard her thoughts.
They were quiet for a few moments as they stared into each other’s eyes. Then with whispered words caressing her skin, Lucian showed her just how necessary she was to him.
Drake stood off to the side as he watched the mated pairs interact. As Decebel’s third, he’d been asked to assist in the war against the vampires and, naturally, he’d obeyed. He would never admit to his Alpha that it was difficult to be around the group—this group. They seemed to always be the ones called on for such missions because all of them were mated. But he…well…he wasn’t. It was hard enough that he had spent so much time in the Serbia pack while it had been under the control of a crazed alpha obsessed with killing Alina and Vasile. Drake couldn’t talk about the things many of them had endured at the hand of their old alpha. Since Decebel had taken over, he’d been able to hide what Thad’s leadership had caused in some of the males of his pack. Not only was it degrading but memories remained that no wolf should ever have to carry. Add to that the fact that, at a century old, he still hadn’t found his true mate, and things were pretty dark in his world. Some days he truly considered defecting, becoming a lone wolf, just to get away from all the laughing, touching, and loving.
Like any male of his species, he longed for the day he would meet his true mate. There wasn’t a day that went by that he didn’t think about her. He didn’t have a face to go with his thoughts, or a voice, or smell, or anything. Those were all things he wondered about, of course. Drake longed to know what color her hair would be and how it would smell. He wanted to see if her mouth had full lips or smaller thin ones. Were her eyes large and round or more almond shaped? Though truly none of that mattered; he would want her regardless of what she looked like. And he was sure he would think she was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. He also wondered what she would think of him. Would she find him attractive? Would she be able to see past the stains that his previous alpha had left on him?
Drake’s gut clenched and his wolf stirred restlessly. The familiar darkness that was a part of who he was scratched and clawed at him. It tried to gain more ground every day. He fought it back, trying to hold on to his sanity so that he would not go feral. He wasn’t sure what was causing it, but for some reason in the last nine months he felt as though the darkness was growing stronger at a much quicker rate than it had before…before what? He didn’t know.
Vasile and Alina stepped into the room and silence descended drawing Drake back from his thoughts.
“Peri, Alston, and Nissa” —Vasile motioned to the fae who were standing to his right— “will be flashing us to Little Rock, Arkansas. They’ve found an empty warehouse where we will congregate and from there decide our next move.”
Drake watched as the three high fae spread out and the others began placing their hands on one of them. Decebel motioned with his head for Drake to join them. He made his way over and placed his hand on Alston’s arm. He didn’t feel comfortable touching one of the female fae. Touching any female seemed to bother him. There was only one he wanted to touch and be touched by. Drake gritted his teeth together, willing himself to push away the thoughts of the mate he didn’t have.
Suddenly the world was sucked away from them—they were weightless, and then a breath later, they reappeared in a large room with a concrete floor, steel walls, and a twenty-five foot ceiling. Drake released the fae and stepped back. Like the other males in the room, he immediately began evaluating the situation. Where were the exits? Were there any potential hiding places that could conceal a foe? Were there any foes? The usual things that every male of his species did when walking into new territory.
Once everyone had arrived, they formed a circle with Vasile, Alina, and Peri standing in the center. He waited, like the loyal soldier he was, for instructions to be given. Drake didn’t know where that thought had come from. He’d never begrudged his place in the pack. In fact, when Decebel had asked him to be his third, and one of his warriors, he’d been pleased. But lately nothing seemed to be enough. Nothing made him content. He was as restless as a caged lion. So far he’d been able to keep it concealed from the others, but the feeling was getting worse. He knew his Alpha was going to pick up on it sooner rather than later. Drake also knew that Decebel wouldn’t hesitate to end him if it became necessary. It would hurt him to do so, that was the kind of Alpha Decebel was. But he would do it nonetheless, and for that Drake was unbelievably thankful. If he lost it, if the darkness took over and his wolf went feral, he wouldn’t want to live as a monster. He made a promise to himself in that moment that, if it all got to be too much, he would talk to Decebel.
Decebel hooked an arm around Jennifer’s waist when she immediately tried to leave his side as they flashed into the warehouse. She glared up at him. He simply shrugged at her. He’d warned her that she would not be leaving his side, and he’d meant it.
He ignored her attempts to loosen his fingers but couldn’t ignore the well placed elbow she jammed into his side. He grunted and heard her chuckle in satisfaction. His mate had a mean streak, and the ridiculous thing was, he liked it. Decebel was pretty sure Jennifer had messed up his head in some fundamental way.
“Maybe you were already screwed up before we met. Ever think about that?” He heard her voice in his mind and loved how it made him feel close to her. He needed that after the fight they’d had, even if they had made up.
“Thoroughly made up, I might add,” she interrupted his thought and he felt his heart pick up at the reminder of just how thorough their making up had been.
“Nosy much, mate?” he growled at her. He didn’t need her distracting him at this moment. Then again, Jennifer simply breathing was a distraction to him, and to most other males for that matter.
“If you would let go of me, I could give you some space so that I won’t be a distraction,” she told him sweetly—too sweetly.
“As long as you are breathing, baby, you will be a distraction. And not an unwelcome one…most of the time,” he told her gently as he gave her side a gentle squeeze.
“Even if we were not bonded, my life would not go on if you were not in this world,” Lucian said, having heard her thoughts.
They were quiet for a few moments as they stared into each other’s eyes. Then with whispered words caressing her skin, Lucian showed her just how necessary she was to him.
Drake stood off to the side as he watched the mated pairs interact. As Decebel’s third, he’d been asked to assist in the war against the vampires and, naturally, he’d obeyed. He would never admit to his Alpha that it was difficult to be around the group—this group. They seemed to always be the ones called on for such missions because all of them were mated. But he…well…he wasn’t. It was hard enough that he had spent so much time in the Serbia pack while it had been under the control of a crazed alpha obsessed with killing Alina and Vasile. Drake couldn’t talk about the things many of them had endured at the hand of their old alpha. Since Decebel had taken over, he’d been able to hide what Thad’s leadership had caused in some of the males of his pack. Not only was it degrading but memories remained that no wolf should ever have to carry. Add to that the fact that, at a century old, he still hadn’t found his true mate, and things were pretty dark in his world. Some days he truly considered defecting, becoming a lone wolf, just to get away from all the laughing, touching, and loving.
Like any male of his species, he longed for the day he would meet his true mate. There wasn’t a day that went by that he didn’t think about her. He didn’t have a face to go with his thoughts, or a voice, or smell, or anything. Those were all things he wondered about, of course. Drake longed to know what color her hair would be and how it would smell. He wanted to see if her mouth had full lips or smaller thin ones. Were her eyes large and round or more almond shaped? Though truly none of that mattered; he would want her regardless of what she looked like. And he was sure he would think she was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. He also wondered what she would think of him. Would she find him attractive? Would she be able to see past the stains that his previous alpha had left on him?
Drake’s gut clenched and his wolf stirred restlessly. The familiar darkness that was a part of who he was scratched and clawed at him. It tried to gain more ground every day. He fought it back, trying to hold on to his sanity so that he would not go feral. He wasn’t sure what was causing it, but for some reason in the last nine months he felt as though the darkness was growing stronger at a much quicker rate than it had before…before what? He didn’t know.
Vasile and Alina stepped into the room and silence descended drawing Drake back from his thoughts.
“Peri, Alston, and Nissa” —Vasile motioned to the fae who were standing to his right— “will be flashing us to Little Rock, Arkansas. They’ve found an empty warehouse where we will congregate and from there decide our next move.”
Drake watched as the three high fae spread out and the others began placing their hands on one of them. Decebel motioned with his head for Drake to join them. He made his way over and placed his hand on Alston’s arm. He didn’t feel comfortable touching one of the female fae. Touching any female seemed to bother him. There was only one he wanted to touch and be touched by. Drake gritted his teeth together, willing himself to push away the thoughts of the mate he didn’t have.
Suddenly the world was sucked away from them—they were weightless, and then a breath later, they reappeared in a large room with a concrete floor, steel walls, and a twenty-five foot ceiling. Drake released the fae and stepped back. Like the other males in the room, he immediately began evaluating the situation. Where were the exits? Were there any potential hiding places that could conceal a foe? Were there any foes? The usual things that every male of his species did when walking into new territory.
Once everyone had arrived, they formed a circle with Vasile, Alina, and Peri standing in the center. He waited, like the loyal soldier he was, for instructions to be given. Drake didn’t know where that thought had come from. He’d never begrudged his place in the pack. In fact, when Decebel had asked him to be his third, and one of his warriors, he’d been pleased. But lately nothing seemed to be enough. Nothing made him content. He was as restless as a caged lion. So far he’d been able to keep it concealed from the others, but the feeling was getting worse. He knew his Alpha was going to pick up on it sooner rather than later. Drake also knew that Decebel wouldn’t hesitate to end him if it became necessary. It would hurt him to do so, that was the kind of Alpha Decebel was. But he would do it nonetheless, and for that Drake was unbelievably thankful. If he lost it, if the darkness took over and his wolf went feral, he wouldn’t want to live as a monster. He made a promise to himself in that moment that, if it all got to be too much, he would talk to Decebel.
Decebel hooked an arm around Jennifer’s waist when she immediately tried to leave his side as they flashed into the warehouse. She glared up at him. He simply shrugged at her. He’d warned her that she would not be leaving his side, and he’d meant it.
He ignored her attempts to loosen his fingers but couldn’t ignore the well placed elbow she jammed into his side. He grunted and heard her chuckle in satisfaction. His mate had a mean streak, and the ridiculous thing was, he liked it. Decebel was pretty sure Jennifer had messed up his head in some fundamental way.
“Maybe you were already screwed up before we met. Ever think about that?” He heard her voice in his mind and loved how it made him feel close to her. He needed that after the fight they’d had, even if they had made up.
“Thoroughly made up, I might add,” she interrupted his thought and he felt his heart pick up at the reminder of just how thorough their making up had been.
“Nosy much, mate?” he growled at her. He didn’t need her distracting him at this moment. Then again, Jennifer simply breathing was a distraction to him, and to most other males for that matter.
“If you would let go of me, I could give you some space so that I won’t be a distraction,” she told him sweetly—too sweetly.
“As long as you are breathing, baby, you will be a distraction. And not an unwelcome one…most of the time,” he told her gently as he gave her side a gentle squeeze.
