Hold on Tight
Page 44

Preston cleared his throat to cover up his laugh. “Probably said the wrong thing, Rose. Best get going before he gets mad. He isn’t drinking tonight, so he’s a loose cannon.”
Rose called me a jackass, then spun around and stalked off.
I waited until she was far enough away before I looked down at Sienna. She was studying me. The tension in her shoulders was gone. That was good.
“Sorry about that,” I said, and she nodded.
Then she looked away again, back toward the stage.
I had to make some small talk because right now Preston and Rock were both trying to figure out what the hell was going on. But even I wasn’t sure what was going on at the moment.
I opened my mouth to say something just as the band started up, and Sienna began swaying in her seat slightly. She liked to dance. I didn’t dance. I hated dancing. I had to be drunk off my ass to dance, and only if we were going from dancing to f**king.
But seeing Sienna sway in her seat with that smile on her face while she watched the people on the dance floor made me stand up and hold out my hand.
“Come on. Let’s dance,” I said. I knew I had just surprised the entire table, but I kept my focus on Sienna.
She beamed at me and slipped her hand in mine. The little black dress she was wearing with her cowboy boots made me want to pull her close so every man in here knew she was with me. Even if she wasn’t.
“I didn’t know you danced,” she said.
“He don’t,” Preston said.
I didn’t acknowledge this comment. I led her out onto the dance floor and pulled her into my arms, and it felt right.
So f**king right.
SIENNA
Dewayne’s big body holding me close was better than the dancing. And I loved dancing. I had never been held close like this and danced with the right way. I kept inhaling Dewayne’s masculine scent. He had a woodsy smell with a hint of peppermint.
He had glared so fiercely at the few people who had bumped into me on the crowded dance floor that no one was getting near us now. He also had me so close to him that I felt like we were one person. The music went from slow to more of a sexy beat, and I slipped my hands up to his shoulders and moved my hips to the music, letting my head fall back and closing my eyes. This was nice. Or more like fantastic. Dewayne’s hands tightened on my hips, and I loved how possessed it made me feel. Even if we were just dancing. For this one moment I was his. And I loved it.
His leg moved between mine and I rubbed against him, only to freeze from the contact and inhale sharply. He was so much taller than me that the friction hit me in just the right place. I gripped the front of his shirt tightly in my fists. We were on a dance floor and I could not hump his leg. But all I had to do was move my hips a little and I’d feel that heavenly pressure again.
His hand was in mine, and he was pulling me from the dance floor before I could decide what to do next. I thought he was mad at me and we were going back to the table, but when I looked around, we were headed the opposite way. It looked like we were headed to a back door. Was that a bathroom? What was he doing?
Dewayne shoved people out of his way who didn’t move on their own, and then he was slamming open the door and we were outside in the dark. There were no parking lot lights, only woods.
“Spread your legs, Sienna,” he ordered as he pressed me up against the wall. “Pull up your skirt and open your legs,” he said again, this time with a growl.
I was too startled to argue. He looked like he wanted what I wanted, so I did exactly like he said. I tugged up my dress and opened my legs.
Then his hand was there, cupping me as he breathed heavily. “This . . . we shouldn’t do this. I’m not that guy. You remember I told you I’m not that guy. But I don’t f**king dance, Sienna. Do you understand me? I don’t f**king dance.”
I was confused. He had danced with me. He slid his finger inside my panties and I didn’t care anymore. I grabbed his arms and cried out in relief and pleasure. He was actually touching me. This was real. And if I was asleep, I really didn’t want to wake up.
“So wet,” he said, pressing his lips to my neck. “Slick little hot pu**y is gonna kill me. You are too much. I want a taste of you, and I can’t keep my hands off you even though I know this will hurt you. I don’t want to hurt you.”
He wasn’t hurting me now. I could hardly form words as he slid his finger inside my entrance. I squeezed his arms and panted.
“I want to f**k this. I want you. I want inside you. Right motherfucking now I want inside you so damn bad my dick is about to bust out of these jeans. But that will be all it is. We won’t do it again. I don’t do relationships. I don’t want you hurt.”
He wanted to f**k me. Just this once and then he’d be done with me. We would be friends again. Or he’d just be my son’s uncle. Could I live with that? Could I give myself to him knowing it was just this once?
No.
I wanted more.
I’d loved Dustin when I had slept with him. Maybe I hadn’t been in love with him, but a part of me did love Dustin. I hadn’t been ready for sex then, but I had loved him and he had wanted to. He had loved me, and that had been enough. But this wasn’t love with Dewayne. He didn’t love me. He never would.
His finger slid back out of me, then circled my clit, and it felt so very good. Being with him would be the most epic moment of my life. I knew that. But then what? I would find a way to move on? Love someone else? Could I ever love someone else? If I tied myself to Dewayne this way, I wouldn’t be able to let him go. Not in my heart. And didn’t I deserve to be loved? To know what it felt like to be held like Preston held Amanda? To know that the man beside me wanted only me?