“Guess you’ve got to stick to salad to fit into all those fancy clothes, huh?”
Her mouth tightened. “I’m not on a diet. I’m just not in a very hungry mood right now.”
Shit, he was acting like an insensitive jerk again. It was just that being with her again pushed all of his buttons. Buttons he hadn’t even realized were there until today.
In lieu of an apology he said, “I know you may not feel like eating right now, not after what you’ve just found out, but you’re not going to do April any good if you’re starving.”
Shrugging as if she didn’t care either way, she said, “You’re right. Order pizza.”
He said, “Everything on it,” at the same time she did and their eyes locked together in an electric moment of remembered awareness.
All the signs of arousal were there—the way her skin flushed, the rapid pulse in her neck, the speeding up of her inhalations. He could have her horizontal and naked on the bed in sixty seconds.
It took every bit of self-control he possessed to force himself to turn away, pick up the phone, and order the pizza.
After hanging up, he paused to wipe all the desire off his face. When he turned around to face her, she was standing in the same place, her eyes still on him.
“Thank you for helping me,” she said in a soft voice. “I know things are kind of weird and—”
He held up a hand. She was about to take them straight into the danger zone. He couldn’t let her do it.
There was only one way to diffuse the bomb of their relentless attraction: clear ground rules.
“Let’s concentrate on finding your sister and bringing her home safely. And because we’re going to need to work together and trust each other, I’ve decided that the best thing we can do is keep the past in the past.”
CHAPTER NINE
DIANNA REELED in disbelief. Had he really just issued her an order? Here’s how we’re gonna do it, babe. No questions. No answers. Just suck it up and get with the program.
But after she’d had a few seconds to digest it, she realized it was less what he said than how he said it that really got to her.
She hated his cold, emotionless voice.
“On the contrary,” she finally replied in a steely voice that not only matched, but raised the frigidity another level. “I don’t think there’s any point in having a big white elephant in the room with us the whole time.”
In her experience managing a sometimes-conflicted staff for a live TV show that couldn’t afford any screw-ups, she never allowed grudges to linger between team members. Between her and Sam, however, she might have been tempted to take the high road and let sleeping dogs lie.
That is, if he hadn’t acted like such a bull in her china shop.
Crossing her arms over her chest, she said, “Because we’re stuck together in this motel room for tonight, I think we should lay everything out on the table and be done with it already.”
Maybe, she suddenly thought, if she got her grievances off her chest, she’d be able to get him out of her system once and for all.
Before she could think better of what she was doing, she continued with, “In the hospital you asked me why I left. Well, I’m ready to tell you my reasons, Sam. Because frankly, I’m sick and tired of carrying them around with me all the time.”
“Forget I asked,” he said. “It doesn’t matter. We should be focusing on April right now.”
No way, she wasn’t letting him backpedal to try to shut her down.
“Of course I’m upset about April,” she said as calmly as she could. “Of course I’m freaking out about what could be happening to her, but if we don’t find some common ground, we’re going to have a very hard time working as a team.”
But he was still shaking his head, his expression completely closed. “I don’t want to fight with you, Dianna.”
“Don’t you see, Sam?” she asked, exasperation breaking through again. “That’s part of the problem. You never wanted to fight. You never wanted to have any kind of conflict between us. I know your parents had a shitty relationship, I know they never stopped fighting, but that doesn’t mean people can’t disagree with each other sometimes.”
“Stop right now, Dianna,” he said, each word a warning, “and we can still do this. We can still go forward and find April.”
But the train she was on was moving too fast for her to just hop off. Even though she was heading straight for a brick wall.
“You haven’t changed a bit, have you?” she said, any pretense of calm now blown to smithereens. “You always thought you knew what was best for both of us.”
“I wouldn’t make accusations you can’t back up,” he said in a hard voice.
She took a step closer, too swept up in her fury to remember to keep her distance from all of his mouth-wateringly hard heat.
“Oh, you want backup? Let’s see, how about the first time we had sex and you didn’t bother to tell me that the condom broke? Or what about when you’d come back from a fire where people had lost their homes, or even their lives, and I’d ask, ‘How are you?’ all you’d ever say was, ‘I’m okay.’ And when I pushed you on it, when I said there was no way anyone could be okay with the things you’d seen, you wouldn’t tell me a damn thing about how you were feeling. All I wanted was to be a part of your life, Sam. For you to let me in. But you refused to give me anything, to open up at all.”
Somewhere in the back of her mind she knew that there was no way Sam—or anyone else, for that matter—could possibly respond to her laundry list of grievances. And yet, when he didn’t even try to defend himself, she couldn’t stop herself from taking it a step further.
“Honestly, I could have forgiven you for all of that. In fact, I did forgive you. Until you went and broke my heart completely.”
His jaw jumped and the sinews on his crossed forearms were taut.
“No need to keep me in suspense any longer, Dianna. I’m a big boy. I can take the blame, so feel free to dish it out.”
Oh God, she hadn’t felt this close to breaking down, to completely falling apart in years. Not since that night she’d left Lake Tahoe.
“After I miscarried, I knew I’d spent too long crying, too long feeling sorry for myself,” she admitted. “So one night I got out of bed, took a shower, actually put on clothes instead of my nightgown.”
Her mouth tightened. “I’m not on a diet. I’m just not in a very hungry mood right now.”
Shit, he was acting like an insensitive jerk again. It was just that being with her again pushed all of his buttons. Buttons he hadn’t even realized were there until today.
In lieu of an apology he said, “I know you may not feel like eating right now, not after what you’ve just found out, but you’re not going to do April any good if you’re starving.”
Shrugging as if she didn’t care either way, she said, “You’re right. Order pizza.”
He said, “Everything on it,” at the same time she did and their eyes locked together in an electric moment of remembered awareness.
All the signs of arousal were there—the way her skin flushed, the rapid pulse in her neck, the speeding up of her inhalations. He could have her horizontal and naked on the bed in sixty seconds.
It took every bit of self-control he possessed to force himself to turn away, pick up the phone, and order the pizza.
After hanging up, he paused to wipe all the desire off his face. When he turned around to face her, she was standing in the same place, her eyes still on him.
“Thank you for helping me,” she said in a soft voice. “I know things are kind of weird and—”
He held up a hand. She was about to take them straight into the danger zone. He couldn’t let her do it.
There was only one way to diffuse the bomb of their relentless attraction: clear ground rules.
“Let’s concentrate on finding your sister and bringing her home safely. And because we’re going to need to work together and trust each other, I’ve decided that the best thing we can do is keep the past in the past.”
CHAPTER NINE
DIANNA REELED in disbelief. Had he really just issued her an order? Here’s how we’re gonna do it, babe. No questions. No answers. Just suck it up and get with the program.
But after she’d had a few seconds to digest it, she realized it was less what he said than how he said it that really got to her.
She hated his cold, emotionless voice.
“On the contrary,” she finally replied in a steely voice that not only matched, but raised the frigidity another level. “I don’t think there’s any point in having a big white elephant in the room with us the whole time.”
In her experience managing a sometimes-conflicted staff for a live TV show that couldn’t afford any screw-ups, she never allowed grudges to linger between team members. Between her and Sam, however, she might have been tempted to take the high road and let sleeping dogs lie.
That is, if he hadn’t acted like such a bull in her china shop.
Crossing her arms over her chest, she said, “Because we’re stuck together in this motel room for tonight, I think we should lay everything out on the table and be done with it already.”
Maybe, she suddenly thought, if she got her grievances off her chest, she’d be able to get him out of her system once and for all.
Before she could think better of what she was doing, she continued with, “In the hospital you asked me why I left. Well, I’m ready to tell you my reasons, Sam. Because frankly, I’m sick and tired of carrying them around with me all the time.”
“Forget I asked,” he said. “It doesn’t matter. We should be focusing on April right now.”
No way, she wasn’t letting him backpedal to try to shut her down.
“Of course I’m upset about April,” she said as calmly as she could. “Of course I’m freaking out about what could be happening to her, but if we don’t find some common ground, we’re going to have a very hard time working as a team.”
But he was still shaking his head, his expression completely closed. “I don’t want to fight with you, Dianna.”
“Don’t you see, Sam?” she asked, exasperation breaking through again. “That’s part of the problem. You never wanted to fight. You never wanted to have any kind of conflict between us. I know your parents had a shitty relationship, I know they never stopped fighting, but that doesn’t mean people can’t disagree with each other sometimes.”
“Stop right now, Dianna,” he said, each word a warning, “and we can still do this. We can still go forward and find April.”
But the train she was on was moving too fast for her to just hop off. Even though she was heading straight for a brick wall.
“You haven’t changed a bit, have you?” she said, any pretense of calm now blown to smithereens. “You always thought you knew what was best for both of us.”
“I wouldn’t make accusations you can’t back up,” he said in a hard voice.
She took a step closer, too swept up in her fury to remember to keep her distance from all of his mouth-wateringly hard heat.
“Oh, you want backup? Let’s see, how about the first time we had sex and you didn’t bother to tell me that the condom broke? Or what about when you’d come back from a fire where people had lost their homes, or even their lives, and I’d ask, ‘How are you?’ all you’d ever say was, ‘I’m okay.’ And when I pushed you on it, when I said there was no way anyone could be okay with the things you’d seen, you wouldn’t tell me a damn thing about how you were feeling. All I wanted was to be a part of your life, Sam. For you to let me in. But you refused to give me anything, to open up at all.”
Somewhere in the back of her mind she knew that there was no way Sam—or anyone else, for that matter—could possibly respond to her laundry list of grievances. And yet, when he didn’t even try to defend himself, she couldn’t stop herself from taking it a step further.
“Honestly, I could have forgiven you for all of that. In fact, I did forgive you. Until you went and broke my heart completely.”
His jaw jumped and the sinews on his crossed forearms were taut.
“No need to keep me in suspense any longer, Dianna. I’m a big boy. I can take the blame, so feel free to dish it out.”
Oh God, she hadn’t felt this close to breaking down, to completely falling apart in years. Not since that night she’d left Lake Tahoe.
“After I miscarried, I knew I’d spent too long crying, too long feeling sorry for myself,” she admitted. “So one night I got out of bed, took a shower, actually put on clothes instead of my nightgown.”
