“I’m okay, just…rough day.”
He nodded in agreement. We laid there for a few more minutes, gazing at one another. It wasn’t uncomfortable, just new. Before, if we were in a bed together, we were tangled together, but now there was an invisible wall. A barrier that kept our bodies’ will at bay.
The effects of my medical cocktail began kicking in, and I let out a deep yawn.
“It’s getting late,” he noted, taking that as a cue. He stood and stretched, leaning down and kissing the top of my head. “Goodnight, Lila love.”
I stared at him as he turned and walked to the doorway; my chest constricted at the thought of him leaving.
“Wait!” I called out to his retreating form, my hand reaching out to him. I couldn’t stand to watch him walk away from me again. “Please,” I said in a whisper. “Don’t leave me.”
He stopped in his tracks and turned toward me, his expression a combination of hopeful and frightened at the same time.
“I’m just going next door, Honeybear, to sleep in your guest room. I’ll leave the door open so all you have to do is call for me, okay?”
Tears filled my eyes, my bottom lip quivering. I hurt, I was tired, and he was leaving.
Panic rose in his features at my distress. “Oh, no, please don’t cry. I’m right here, baby, I’m right here.” His hand reached out to stroke my hair.
I wasn’t ready to forgive him, and I wasn’t ready to let him back in, but I couldn’t stand to not be near him. The other room was too far away.
Why couldn’t the drugs take away the pain in my heart, as well?
CHAPTER 7
I awoke warm and in pain, struggling to gain a full breath. There was a squeeze around my chest constricting me even further. I opened my eyes and turned to find Nathan’s closed ones in front of me. His arms were wrapped around me, our legs entangled. We had both drifted in the night, our bodies not fighting the pull as they crawled to find each other.
“Nate.” I was quiet as I tried to rouse him. As much as I loved being wrapped in his arms, it hurt to breathe and my bladder was screaming at me, as well. “Nathan, I need to go to the bathroom.”
My chest tightened over the fact I needed help doing such menial tasks, but I couldn’t walk yet, even on crutches.
He made a cute noise before snuggling further, mumbling something I couldn’t understand. “Nathan.” I tried again, this time stroking his cheek, hoping my touch would stir him.
His eyes fluttered open and a lazy smile spread on his face. “Mmm, Honeybear.” His voice was sleepy and he snuggled in again, his eyes closing.
His movement caused a surge of pain to shoot through my chest. I drew in a sharp breath and cried out in pain, my eyes screwed tight.
That got his attention and his eyes shot open, staring at me in horror. “Oh, shit!” he exclaimed before releasing me. “I’m so sorry!”
His hands were frantic, but gentle, as he assessed me like adrenaline was running through him in his panicked search of my body. Mumbled apologies slipped from his lips, but I couldn’t get him to look me in the eye so I could tell him to stop, that I was all right.
He ran into the bathroom and came out with the first aid kit. I twitched, wondering just what the hell he was planning on doing with it. Before I could even ask he left the room again, returning with a glass of water and a handful of my medication bottles.
It was past ridiculous. “Nate!” He jumped, startled at my reaction, his movements ceased. “What the hell are you doing?”
“Umm…you’re hurt.”
“I hurt anyway, but I cried out because you squeezed my ribs. Once you stopped, the pain lessened to its ‘normal’ level.”
He stared at me, and I watched the wild look leave his eyes and his breathing calm. He kissed my forehead before returning the items he had gathered back to their rightful places.
After a bathroom break, he made up some breakfast, instant oatmeal, and we ate in the bed while watching the morning news. Once we were done eating, he returned our dishes to the kitchen and climbed back on the bed with me. We flipped through channels, settling on a marathon of some reality show.
We lay there, side by side, watching as they went through outbuildings and homes, yards and estates, searching for unknown hidden treasures. The entire time I felt Nathan’s eyes on me, and every once in a while his fingers would gently run down my cheek, against my arm. Goose bumps formed and fire burned in the wake of his touch.
It was strange how comfortable I was with his touch in that moment even after everything that had happened between us. Was it because I finally knew without a doubt I was in love with him? I swallowed, and my eyes drifted to his hands on me. My heart fluttered and my skin warmed at his touch.
I wanted to launch myself at him, straddle his hips, and sink down on his perfect cock. His hands grabbing me, teeth biting my skin, the need I always felt pouring out of him. My body was desperate for the connection with him that I hadn’t felt in almost a month.
A muscle twitch reminded me how such antics would not be good as pain shot down my leg. Also, my fears and insecurities about Nathan reared their ugly heads, and the feeling retreated. As much as I wanted the comfort of his body, we weren’t ready for that yet.
After a few hours and a nap, Nathan turned to me with a mischievous grin.
“What?” I asked, knowing that face meant trouble.
He held up the Jane Eyre DVD. “The doctor cleared me; I’m all healed from my lobotomy. I’m more than happy to watch it with you.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “You know, it’s a chick flick. You might need another lobotomy to get through it.”
He smirked at me. “We’ll see about that.”
He got off the bed and popped the DVD in. There was a small buzz of excitement running through me. It always happened when I was about to watch it, but there was something different about watching it with Nathan, the man I loved.
I was surprised when an hour and a half later Nathan was still awake; in fact, he’d been enraptured by it.
Erin stopped by that afternoon to drop off some homemade enchiladas and stayed to play a board game with us. Something other than television was wonderful. I lost focus about halfway through and ended up napping through the remainder. Erin won, though Nathan was not convinced she played fair.
I woke up a while later to Erin sitting on the bed next to me. Her focus was on something in her lap. She was working with large needles in her hand, and yarn to her side: knitting.
He nodded in agreement. We laid there for a few more minutes, gazing at one another. It wasn’t uncomfortable, just new. Before, if we were in a bed together, we were tangled together, but now there was an invisible wall. A barrier that kept our bodies’ will at bay.
The effects of my medical cocktail began kicking in, and I let out a deep yawn.
“It’s getting late,” he noted, taking that as a cue. He stood and stretched, leaning down and kissing the top of my head. “Goodnight, Lila love.”
I stared at him as he turned and walked to the doorway; my chest constricted at the thought of him leaving.
“Wait!” I called out to his retreating form, my hand reaching out to him. I couldn’t stand to watch him walk away from me again. “Please,” I said in a whisper. “Don’t leave me.”
He stopped in his tracks and turned toward me, his expression a combination of hopeful and frightened at the same time.
“I’m just going next door, Honeybear, to sleep in your guest room. I’ll leave the door open so all you have to do is call for me, okay?”
Tears filled my eyes, my bottom lip quivering. I hurt, I was tired, and he was leaving.
Panic rose in his features at my distress. “Oh, no, please don’t cry. I’m right here, baby, I’m right here.” His hand reached out to stroke my hair.
I wasn’t ready to forgive him, and I wasn’t ready to let him back in, but I couldn’t stand to not be near him. The other room was too far away.
Why couldn’t the drugs take away the pain in my heart, as well?
CHAPTER 7
I awoke warm and in pain, struggling to gain a full breath. There was a squeeze around my chest constricting me even further. I opened my eyes and turned to find Nathan’s closed ones in front of me. His arms were wrapped around me, our legs entangled. We had both drifted in the night, our bodies not fighting the pull as they crawled to find each other.
“Nate.” I was quiet as I tried to rouse him. As much as I loved being wrapped in his arms, it hurt to breathe and my bladder was screaming at me, as well. “Nathan, I need to go to the bathroom.”
My chest tightened over the fact I needed help doing such menial tasks, but I couldn’t walk yet, even on crutches.
He made a cute noise before snuggling further, mumbling something I couldn’t understand. “Nathan.” I tried again, this time stroking his cheek, hoping my touch would stir him.
His eyes fluttered open and a lazy smile spread on his face. “Mmm, Honeybear.” His voice was sleepy and he snuggled in again, his eyes closing.
His movement caused a surge of pain to shoot through my chest. I drew in a sharp breath and cried out in pain, my eyes screwed tight.
That got his attention and his eyes shot open, staring at me in horror. “Oh, shit!” he exclaimed before releasing me. “I’m so sorry!”
His hands were frantic, but gentle, as he assessed me like adrenaline was running through him in his panicked search of my body. Mumbled apologies slipped from his lips, but I couldn’t get him to look me in the eye so I could tell him to stop, that I was all right.
He ran into the bathroom and came out with the first aid kit. I twitched, wondering just what the hell he was planning on doing with it. Before I could even ask he left the room again, returning with a glass of water and a handful of my medication bottles.
It was past ridiculous. “Nate!” He jumped, startled at my reaction, his movements ceased. “What the hell are you doing?”
“Umm…you’re hurt.”
“I hurt anyway, but I cried out because you squeezed my ribs. Once you stopped, the pain lessened to its ‘normal’ level.”
He stared at me, and I watched the wild look leave his eyes and his breathing calm. He kissed my forehead before returning the items he had gathered back to their rightful places.
After a bathroom break, he made up some breakfast, instant oatmeal, and we ate in the bed while watching the morning news. Once we were done eating, he returned our dishes to the kitchen and climbed back on the bed with me. We flipped through channels, settling on a marathon of some reality show.
We lay there, side by side, watching as they went through outbuildings and homes, yards and estates, searching for unknown hidden treasures. The entire time I felt Nathan’s eyes on me, and every once in a while his fingers would gently run down my cheek, against my arm. Goose bumps formed and fire burned in the wake of his touch.
It was strange how comfortable I was with his touch in that moment even after everything that had happened between us. Was it because I finally knew without a doubt I was in love with him? I swallowed, and my eyes drifted to his hands on me. My heart fluttered and my skin warmed at his touch.
I wanted to launch myself at him, straddle his hips, and sink down on his perfect cock. His hands grabbing me, teeth biting my skin, the need I always felt pouring out of him. My body was desperate for the connection with him that I hadn’t felt in almost a month.
A muscle twitch reminded me how such antics would not be good as pain shot down my leg. Also, my fears and insecurities about Nathan reared their ugly heads, and the feeling retreated. As much as I wanted the comfort of his body, we weren’t ready for that yet.
After a few hours and a nap, Nathan turned to me with a mischievous grin.
“What?” I asked, knowing that face meant trouble.
He held up the Jane Eyre DVD. “The doctor cleared me; I’m all healed from my lobotomy. I’m more than happy to watch it with you.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “You know, it’s a chick flick. You might need another lobotomy to get through it.”
He smirked at me. “We’ll see about that.”
He got off the bed and popped the DVD in. There was a small buzz of excitement running through me. It always happened when I was about to watch it, but there was something different about watching it with Nathan, the man I loved.
I was surprised when an hour and a half later Nathan was still awake; in fact, he’d been enraptured by it.
Erin stopped by that afternoon to drop off some homemade enchiladas and stayed to play a board game with us. Something other than television was wonderful. I lost focus about halfway through and ended up napping through the remainder. Erin won, though Nathan was not convinced she played fair.
I woke up a while later to Erin sitting on the bed next to me. Her focus was on something in her lap. She was working with large needles in her hand, and yarn to her side: knitting.
