“Jesus man, have you not heard a thing we told you? She’s ashamed of it! She’s afraid you’ll judge her, the way people have judged us all our whole lives. Deal with it. How does one tell someone they’ve been abused anyway? Is it appropriate between courses at dinner? After a picnic? How should she have told you and how would you have reacted? She’s afraid of letting anyone in, because people hurt her or they ignore it when she’s hurting.” Nathan shook his head sadly.
“Good Lord,” Polly whispered, holding Edward’s hand.
“If you’re going to leave her over this, please do us, do her a favor and wait until after she’s recovered and home,” Beth said.
“You think I’d walk away from her because of this? God, what kind of man do you think I am? I love her. I wasn’t making that up. She’s…in the months we’ve been together, she’s become so much to me. I would never hurt her, especially not over something that wasn’t her fault.”
“We’ll be her shiny Christmas mornings,” Polly said quietly. “We’ve got room around our tree for fourteen more.”
Matt kissed his mother, fighting back tears. “Thanks, Momma. Why don’t you and Daddy go to see her while I get myself together.”
His parents nodded and headed down the hall. Matt stood and faced her siblings. “Thank you for trusting me to tell me this and for helping me to understand her better.”
“We trusted you with the story because you seem worthy of her. Please let us be right.” Anne stood and hugged him.
“I love Tate with all that I am.”
His siblings and their wives surrounded him, hugging him.
Shane looked into his face. “You gonna be all right? We’ve got your back.”
“Yeah, but thanks. Thanks to all of you.”
“It’s gonna be hard to make charges stick if the mother won’t remember anything. If he says it was an accident they may not go forward. It’s not my choice, I want you to know I’ll do all I can, but you should be ready for that eventuality.”
Matt sighed, swallowing hard. “We’ll handle it if it comes along. Maybe the mother will do the right thing.”
Shane’s face told Matt just how dubious he was at that idea.
Matt’s head spun. He didn’t quite know how to process all he’d heard. He felt a deep, murderous rage toward Tate’s father and bottomless tenderness toward his own woman. He knew he couldn’t show her any pity or she’d be hurt. Knew she didn’t want it, just his love and respect.
Tate looked up to see Cassie Chase come in. Deep, bone-deep exhaustion settled into her. She wanted to be that cultured, that beautiful and graceful, and that wasn’t going to ever be. She’d never be tall and beautiful like Cassie.
“Hi, Tate, how are you feeling?” Cassie sat in the chair next to the bed and kicked off her shoes.
“Been better.” She smiled weakly.
“Yeah, worse too, haven’t you?”
Tate stilled as Cassie looked at her through alarmingly perceptive eyes. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“Yes you do. Takes one to know one, Tate. I’ve been there in a hospital bed after a man gave me a concussion. More than once as a matter of fact. I know the bitterness of shame in my gut, too. I know what it is to hide it and think people will judge. Do you know my story?”
Tate shook her head. “I know someone tried to hurt you a few years ago.”
“My ex-husband. Tried to kill me actually. For the second time.” Cassie told her the story of her years of abuse and of how her ex skipped out on his sentencing and then came to Petal to try and finish the job he nearly succeeded in before.
Cassie held up her right hand, the middle finger was bent at an odd angle. “This is what he did with the hammer. I’ll never be a surgeon again. Funny how life works. Still, it drove me here to Petal, which brought Shane into my life and I realized what happened to me wasn’t my fault. Wasn’t my shame to bear and it’s not yours either, Tate.”
“I can’t…how did you know?”
“I saw how you reacted after dinner the other night. I saw myself in your eyes. Heard more from your family just now.”
Tate felt the heat of her blush, replaced by the familiar coldness of the shame. “They told you? All of you? They told you all of it?”
Cassie reached out and took Tate’s hand. “I’m sure there’s more. Years of shame. They told us enough that I know you were abused and still are. Enough that I know what an amazingly strong woman you are for stepping in with your younger siblings. You have a family with them. Your father tried to destroy it but you didn’t let him. You win, Tate. That’s what he hates so much. He can’t break you.”
Tears rolled down Tate’s face. The wall of shame, the barriers that’d kept it all back were gone and it rushed out in wave after wave of emotion. Cassie got in the bed next to Tate, putting her arms around her.
“You win, Tate Murphy. Don’t you see? You’re worthy of all the people who love you. And let me tell you, your brothers and sisters love and respect you so much it made me proud to know you. And Matt, he loves you, Tate. It’s not charity. It’s not pity. He loves you. All of you, flaws and alcoholic father, neglectful mother, everything. Let it go and stop letting him get to you.”
“That’s so easy to say,” Tate sobbed as Cassie continued to hold her. Wanting with all she was for it to be true.
“Good Lord,” Polly whispered, holding Edward’s hand.
“If you’re going to leave her over this, please do us, do her a favor and wait until after she’s recovered and home,” Beth said.
“You think I’d walk away from her because of this? God, what kind of man do you think I am? I love her. I wasn’t making that up. She’s…in the months we’ve been together, she’s become so much to me. I would never hurt her, especially not over something that wasn’t her fault.”
“We’ll be her shiny Christmas mornings,” Polly said quietly. “We’ve got room around our tree for fourteen more.”
Matt kissed his mother, fighting back tears. “Thanks, Momma. Why don’t you and Daddy go to see her while I get myself together.”
His parents nodded and headed down the hall. Matt stood and faced her siblings. “Thank you for trusting me to tell me this and for helping me to understand her better.”
“We trusted you with the story because you seem worthy of her. Please let us be right.” Anne stood and hugged him.
“I love Tate with all that I am.”
His siblings and their wives surrounded him, hugging him.
Shane looked into his face. “You gonna be all right? We’ve got your back.”
“Yeah, but thanks. Thanks to all of you.”
“It’s gonna be hard to make charges stick if the mother won’t remember anything. If he says it was an accident they may not go forward. It’s not my choice, I want you to know I’ll do all I can, but you should be ready for that eventuality.”
Matt sighed, swallowing hard. “We’ll handle it if it comes along. Maybe the mother will do the right thing.”
Shane’s face told Matt just how dubious he was at that idea.
Matt’s head spun. He didn’t quite know how to process all he’d heard. He felt a deep, murderous rage toward Tate’s father and bottomless tenderness toward his own woman. He knew he couldn’t show her any pity or she’d be hurt. Knew she didn’t want it, just his love and respect.
Tate looked up to see Cassie Chase come in. Deep, bone-deep exhaustion settled into her. She wanted to be that cultured, that beautiful and graceful, and that wasn’t going to ever be. She’d never be tall and beautiful like Cassie.
“Hi, Tate, how are you feeling?” Cassie sat in the chair next to the bed and kicked off her shoes.
“Been better.” She smiled weakly.
“Yeah, worse too, haven’t you?”
Tate stilled as Cassie looked at her through alarmingly perceptive eyes. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“Yes you do. Takes one to know one, Tate. I’ve been there in a hospital bed after a man gave me a concussion. More than once as a matter of fact. I know the bitterness of shame in my gut, too. I know what it is to hide it and think people will judge. Do you know my story?”
Tate shook her head. “I know someone tried to hurt you a few years ago.”
“My ex-husband. Tried to kill me actually. For the second time.” Cassie told her the story of her years of abuse and of how her ex skipped out on his sentencing and then came to Petal to try and finish the job he nearly succeeded in before.
Cassie held up her right hand, the middle finger was bent at an odd angle. “This is what he did with the hammer. I’ll never be a surgeon again. Funny how life works. Still, it drove me here to Petal, which brought Shane into my life and I realized what happened to me wasn’t my fault. Wasn’t my shame to bear and it’s not yours either, Tate.”
“I can’t…how did you know?”
“I saw how you reacted after dinner the other night. I saw myself in your eyes. Heard more from your family just now.”
Tate felt the heat of her blush, replaced by the familiar coldness of the shame. “They told you? All of you? They told you all of it?”
Cassie reached out and took Tate’s hand. “I’m sure there’s more. Years of shame. They told us enough that I know you were abused and still are. Enough that I know what an amazingly strong woman you are for stepping in with your younger siblings. You have a family with them. Your father tried to destroy it but you didn’t let him. You win, Tate. That’s what he hates so much. He can’t break you.”
Tears rolled down Tate’s face. The wall of shame, the barriers that’d kept it all back were gone and it rushed out in wave after wave of emotion. Cassie got in the bed next to Tate, putting her arms around her.
“You win, Tate Murphy. Don’t you see? You’re worthy of all the people who love you. And let me tell you, your brothers and sisters love and respect you so much it made me proud to know you. And Matt, he loves you, Tate. It’s not charity. It’s not pity. He loves you. All of you, flaws and alcoholic father, neglectful mother, everything. Let it go and stop letting him get to you.”
“That’s so easy to say,” Tate sobbed as Cassie continued to hold her. Wanting with all she was for it to be true.
