Nightwalker
Page 49

“Yes, but my soul was quite satisfied.”
She laughed. “I’m very happy to hear that.” She paused a beat. “But you would tell me, right? I mean, if you weren’t. Satisfied.” She blushed and covered it by dipping her head and taking a bite of her sandwich.
“I would tell you,” he assured her, reaching to touch a finger to her flushing cheek. “And you will do the same, yes?”
“I don’t think there’s any fear of that,” she said.
“Just the same. I want your promise. If there is anything not right for you, you will tell me immediately.”
“I promise. I will tell you.”
“Good. This is young yet and we do not know each other well enough to read all the outside clues. Honesty is the only way we will learn.”
“So…there’s nothing I’m doing wrong? Nothing I should be doing but I’m not?”
“Nothing I can think of right now. But if something occurs to me you will be the first to know.”
“Thank you,” she said, feeling pleased with herself for being so bold with him. She wanted to handle this relationship like a mature woman, with realistic expectations. It was wrong of her to feel hurt by a simple slight of words. As he said, the relationship was young yet. Meaning came with time.
It was just that it seemed to come so easy with him. She had never once felt awkward or gauche; he had made her feel like she was normal. Maybe even special.
And while she was happy with the way everyone was treating her—being very friendly and trying to engage her in conversation—she wasn’t good at conversation so she felt awkward. But if it was just him, it was different somehow. He was different. She never felt like he was judging her. He was the only one in the world she felt that way about.
“Hey you,” Marissa greeted as she walked into the kitchen. She disregarded Kamen and stood between their stools so her back was to him. “Viève, we’re going to play a game of Nightwalker capture the flag. Want to play?”
“Oh, I couldn’t,” she said. “I’m not good at games.”
“Well, it’s more of a drill than it is a game. We’re using the game to hone our abilities as a cohesive unit.”
“But my ability is a deathtouch. I can’t practice using that on any of you because you’d die or become extremely ill.”
“Wait, you mean your deathtouch doesn’t always kill?” Kamen asked from behind Marissa’s back.
Piqued, Viève reached out and gently moved Marissa aside a pair of steps so she could see Kamen and include him in the conversation.
“The deathtouch has degrees,” she explained. “It can be like giving someone a dose of the plague or it can be instant death. We can choose how extreme it is. Just like we can control when to use it.”
“That’s a very handy skill. You can incapacitate without killing. That could be important,” Kamen said. “Sometimes the less casualties the better. Remember, the Templars think Apep is still Odjit. They are following her out of loyalty and the dedication she had built up over generations and generations of lives. These are misguided Bodywalkers. Some may not even want to fight, they just don’t know how to defect safely.”
“We can’t think like that or it will make us hesitate when we should be striking hard,” Marissa said with a frown.
“I know these people. Many of them are following her because she has promised unity between the warring sides of the Bodywalkers. By now they must be realizing something is very wrong with Odjit. Apep is bloodthirsty and cruel. Odjit was cold and could be cruel, but there was always a purpose to what she did. An explanation for why she was doing something. Apep is just mayhem for the sake of making mayhem. I’m sure they are puzzled as to why she got pregnant. Odjit was never a mother. Not since her original life. She had no tolerance for kids and she made no secret of it. If one of her trusted aides became a parent, she would demote them so they were at a distance from her. There are no children in Odjit’s immediate camp.”
“So why don’t they just leave if she’s gotten so bad?” Marissa asked.
“Did it not occur to you that they stay out of fear? If Apep caught someone trying to sneak out of camp what do you think would happen? Probably has happened. And those who were caught were no doubt made an example of. Fear is a powerful motivator.”
Marissa frowned. “We want unity. We want to end this civil war. But it’s gone on so long and people are so inured in their ways…including us. We have thought of Templars as ‘the enemy’ for so long but you’re saying many of them are just misguided. What about the souls they suppress? Once a Templar Blends with its host it suppresses the host soul. Templars are not going to want to change that. To ‘share’ their bodies. They prefer things the way they are.”
“Not all. Not all suppress. We are told to by Odjit, but there are those who don’t agree and allow an equal Blending to take place.”
“What about you? What have you done?” Viève asked.
Kamen frowned. “I have suppressed my host. I have never wanted to do otherwise…until recently. I want to put us on equal footing again, but it will have to wait until after this threat is dealt with. I need complete control of my body and my conscience.”
“That sounds like an excuse to me,” Marissa said harshly.
“It is a truth. The fact is I am far more succinct and cutthroat than my host is. My host soul has also witnessed the things I have done. That has no doubt caused damage to his psyche. There will be a time for reconciliation, but that time is not now.”
“I understand,” Viève said. “But you will reconcile after?”
“I will,” he said with a nod. “It will make me a different person; one I hope you can give the benefit of the doubt to when the time comes,” he said to Marissa.
“I’ll worry about that when the time comes,” Marissa said coolly.
“You’re not being fair!” Viève said with frustration.
“Viève…” Kamen said.
“No! You’re trying. You’re making an effort here. And you have been for the better part of a year. You’re doing more than anyone else to put this all together. I think you deserve a little bit of consideration for that!”