I studied him. Griff was ruggedly sexy and had a commanding presence that you just knew not to fuck with. But if you didn’t fuck with him, he was the kind of man who would always be on your side, and I had a deep respect for him. I’d had some of the most amazing and deep conversations with him over the years when he’d let me in; he was a scary guy but he was proof that there was beauty in everyone if you looked hard enough.
Griff was good with silence, and we sat quietly for awhile before he looked up at me and asked, “You after Nash?”
“Huh?” I wasn’t sure if he meant tonight or in general.
“Figured you’d come in to see him seems it’s your day off and there’s no other reason for you to be here. He’s out the front somewhere.”
“Probably with some skank,” I muttered under my breath, jealousy stabbing me with a sharp knife.
“You might be surprised,” he murmured, thoughtfully.
“And I might not be.”
He put down his pen and gave me his full attention. “You got something going on with him?”
I hesitated for a moment, but then threw caution to the wind. “No. We slept together once, but that’s all.”
He scowled. “Hell of a way to fuck with a friendship.”
“Thanks, Griff. I can always count on you to state the bloody obvious,” I grumbled.
“Shit, Velvet, I thought you had your head screwed on better than that. You’re a tough bitch on the outside but I know that under all that bullshit, you’re just like every other woman.”
“What the hell does that mean?”
He leant closer to me. “It means that sex isn’t always just sex. For you to give that to a friend, to Nash... fuck, it tells me you want more from him.”
Conflicting emotions assaulted me; my stomach was a knot of anxiety at the thought of what he’d said being true. Before I could form a reply, we were interrupted by a voice at the door. “Griff, Cody needs you out the front, brother.”
Nash.
I looked up into his eyes. He was talking to Griff but his full concentration was on me. I squirmed under his fierce gaze.
Griff pushed his chair back, and gave me one last piece of advice before leaving, “Keep your fucking legs closed until you work out what the hell you want.”
He exited the room, leaving me in a state of inner turmoil. I continued to watch Nash, waiting for him to say something. He didn’t take his eyes off me, but he eventually spun around and left without uttering a word.
What the hell?
I jumped up and immediately stalked after him. We were sorting this shit out right now even if I had to tie him to the spot and force him to talk.
He’d made for the front door of the club and I followed him outside before finally catching up to him as he rounded the corner of the building into the carpark.
“Nash!”
He promptly stopped and turned to face me. “Not getting into this with you tonight, Velvet.” His voice was savage, and I recoiled.
“When will you get into it with me?” I demanded.
“Do we even have to get into it?”
“You did not just fucking say that, Nash!”
“Yes, I fuckin’ did,” he threw back at me, hacking into my heart a little more.
He’d knocked the wind out of me and I struggled with where to go from here. “I thought you were different.”
“No, Velvet, I’m not. I’m your standard bastard who likes to fuck without further complications. If you thought there was more to this, you were wrong.”
My heart ached for my friend; the one I thought was inside him somewhere. I just wanted him back. Instead, he’d disappeared and in his place was this asshole who I didn’t want a bar of. “No, I thought you were different because I thought I was your friend. That’s all I wanted from you, and you couldn’t even give me that.”
His eyes flashed with ferocity. “You done?”
“Yes, I’m done. We’re done,” I spat.
His chest heaved, and he blew out a long breath before saying, “Good.”
I watched him turn and leave with the heaviest heart I’d ever had. Not even my ex husband had caused this amount of pain.
Chapter 11
Do I Wanna Know ~ Arctic Monkeys
Nash
I woke after a restless night. A night where I’d wrestled with some motherfucking demons. They’d chased me down and knocked my ass flat on the ground, strangling the life out of me. I’d almost hit the point of no return last night. The bottle was begging me to make her my mistress again, and it was taking every fucking ounce of restraint I had not to succumb to her charms.
The one thing that could help me, the release I craved, was the one thing I couldn’t make myself do. Sex. Usually I fucked my way out of this black hole, but Velvet had changed all of that. She’d changed everything, and the suffocating pressure I experienced when I thought about her told me that I needed to stay as far from her as I could. The fucking problem was that a need like I’d never known consumed my every waking moment; a need that only she could fill.
Fuck.
My phone buzzed with a text as I was getting ready for the day.
Erika: Thanks very much for assaulting my neighbour.
Me: You’re fucking welcome.
Erika: Not what I was aiming for, asshole.
Me: He deserved it.
Erika: I give up.
I shoved my phone in my pocket, choosing to ignore any further messages from her. I’d see her tonight anyway, and had no doubt she’d continue her tirade then. Until then, I had club business that needed taking care of. Griff was meeting me at the clubhouse in half an hour to go over some of it so I pushed everything else to the back of my mind and concentrated on the one part of my life I still felt some control over.
Griff was good with silence, and we sat quietly for awhile before he looked up at me and asked, “You after Nash?”
“Huh?” I wasn’t sure if he meant tonight or in general.
“Figured you’d come in to see him seems it’s your day off and there’s no other reason for you to be here. He’s out the front somewhere.”
“Probably with some skank,” I muttered under my breath, jealousy stabbing me with a sharp knife.
“You might be surprised,” he murmured, thoughtfully.
“And I might not be.”
He put down his pen and gave me his full attention. “You got something going on with him?”
I hesitated for a moment, but then threw caution to the wind. “No. We slept together once, but that’s all.”
He scowled. “Hell of a way to fuck with a friendship.”
“Thanks, Griff. I can always count on you to state the bloody obvious,” I grumbled.
“Shit, Velvet, I thought you had your head screwed on better than that. You’re a tough bitch on the outside but I know that under all that bullshit, you’re just like every other woman.”
“What the hell does that mean?”
He leant closer to me. “It means that sex isn’t always just sex. For you to give that to a friend, to Nash... fuck, it tells me you want more from him.”
Conflicting emotions assaulted me; my stomach was a knot of anxiety at the thought of what he’d said being true. Before I could form a reply, we were interrupted by a voice at the door. “Griff, Cody needs you out the front, brother.”
Nash.
I looked up into his eyes. He was talking to Griff but his full concentration was on me. I squirmed under his fierce gaze.
Griff pushed his chair back, and gave me one last piece of advice before leaving, “Keep your fucking legs closed until you work out what the hell you want.”
He exited the room, leaving me in a state of inner turmoil. I continued to watch Nash, waiting for him to say something. He didn’t take his eyes off me, but he eventually spun around and left without uttering a word.
What the hell?
I jumped up and immediately stalked after him. We were sorting this shit out right now even if I had to tie him to the spot and force him to talk.
He’d made for the front door of the club and I followed him outside before finally catching up to him as he rounded the corner of the building into the carpark.
“Nash!”
He promptly stopped and turned to face me. “Not getting into this with you tonight, Velvet.” His voice was savage, and I recoiled.
“When will you get into it with me?” I demanded.
“Do we even have to get into it?”
“You did not just fucking say that, Nash!”
“Yes, I fuckin’ did,” he threw back at me, hacking into my heart a little more.
He’d knocked the wind out of me and I struggled with where to go from here. “I thought you were different.”
“No, Velvet, I’m not. I’m your standard bastard who likes to fuck without further complications. If you thought there was more to this, you were wrong.”
My heart ached for my friend; the one I thought was inside him somewhere. I just wanted him back. Instead, he’d disappeared and in his place was this asshole who I didn’t want a bar of. “No, I thought you were different because I thought I was your friend. That’s all I wanted from you, and you couldn’t even give me that.”
His eyes flashed with ferocity. “You done?”
“Yes, I’m done. We’re done,” I spat.
His chest heaved, and he blew out a long breath before saying, “Good.”
I watched him turn and leave with the heaviest heart I’d ever had. Not even my ex husband had caused this amount of pain.
Chapter 11
Do I Wanna Know ~ Arctic Monkeys
Nash
I woke after a restless night. A night where I’d wrestled with some motherfucking demons. They’d chased me down and knocked my ass flat on the ground, strangling the life out of me. I’d almost hit the point of no return last night. The bottle was begging me to make her my mistress again, and it was taking every fucking ounce of restraint I had not to succumb to her charms.
The one thing that could help me, the release I craved, was the one thing I couldn’t make myself do. Sex. Usually I fucked my way out of this black hole, but Velvet had changed all of that. She’d changed everything, and the suffocating pressure I experienced when I thought about her told me that I needed to stay as far from her as I could. The fucking problem was that a need like I’d never known consumed my every waking moment; a need that only she could fill.
Fuck.
My phone buzzed with a text as I was getting ready for the day.
Erika: Thanks very much for assaulting my neighbour.
Me: You’re fucking welcome.
Erika: Not what I was aiming for, asshole.
Me: He deserved it.
Erika: I give up.
I shoved my phone in my pocket, choosing to ignore any further messages from her. I’d see her tonight anyway, and had no doubt she’d continue her tirade then. Until then, I had club business that needed taking care of. Griff was meeting me at the clubhouse in half an hour to go over some of it so I pushed everything else to the back of my mind and concentrated on the one part of my life I still felt some control over.