She nodded, tears in her eyes.
“Then I’m happy. Go take your shower, and when you come back, I’ll show you how to make me even happier.” He smiled, taking her hands then helping her to her feet.
Her troubled gaze caught his as she went into the bathroom, closing the door behind her.
Shade took off his clothes then lay down on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. For a brief second, he had feared she had found out about him. If he wasn’t careful, his smothering attitude was going to have the opposite effect he wanted. Instead of making her not want to leave him, it might be what drove her away.
He couldn’t bring himself to treat her like his other women, because she was more than that to him. He couldn’t treat her like a true submissive, because he was constantly worried something he did would trigger a memory. The few times he had taken her the way he wanted, he had gone gently with her, wanting to ease her into it, but that had stopped when she had become pregnant. He had gone too far being overprotective after the break-in at Evie’s house and had become worse as her pregnancy had advanced.
They had married on Christmas day, and like a kid who was finally given a toy he had wanted for a long time, he had been excited about getting it yet afraid of touching or playing with it because he didn’t want to damage it.
Lily was asking him to trust her, to have faith that their marriage couldn’t be broken apart.
The bathroom door opened and Lily came out dressed in her nightgown, brushing her long, black hair as her eyes gave a soft apology.
To give her what she wanted, he would have to be willing to take the risk of losing her, and that wasn’t a risk he was going to take.
* * *
“You done for the night?” Train asked when Shade stretched from his bent position at the workstation.
“Finally.” Shade packed the order he had filled, placing it in the mail cart which the truck would pick up and take out early in the morning.
“You’re looking tired.”
Shade grimaced mockingly. “Guess I’m getting old.”
“Or you’re not getting enough sleep,” Train said shrewdly. “I thought your sleepless nights would be over when you married Lily.”
“I’ve been putting a lot of hours in since Cash wrecked his bike. The last month since he’s been home, he’s doing better, so I’m hoping he’s well enough that he can start working a few shifts soon.”
Train nodded. “You go ahead. I’ll finish this order I’m working on and lock up.”
“Thanks, Train.”
“Welcome. Shade … You know, if you need anything—anything at all—we’re all here for you, right?”
Shade cocked his head to the side. “Where did that come from?”
“Brooke has to be a thorn in your side, and with a kid on the way, it would be hard to handle that kind of problem.”
“If I find proof that Brooke had anything to do with Evie’s break-in last summer, believe me, brother, I won’t have a problem dealing with her the way she deserves,” Shade said ominously.
“When you make the decision, remember we’re here to have your back.”
“I will. See you tomorrow.” Shade went out of the factory, sucking in a deep breath. Thinking about Brooke brought back his frustration.
They hadn’t been able to tie her to the three men who had broken into Evie’s house. He was furious at himself for not leaving one alive to get information, but he hadn’t wanted to take a chance with Lily’s safety if bullets had started flying around the room.
As he walked up the path, he heard the blaring music from the clubhouse, but he wasn’t even tempted to go inside. He was too fucking tired.
He saw Cash leading Bliss into the gazebo. The brother had surprised him, since he had thought Cash would have made more attempts to see Rachel. Instead, he was seeking solace from the women in the clubhouse.
Shade opened the door to his house and saw Lily and Rachel sitting in the living room. As exhausted as he was, he couldn’t help smiling when Lily got up to give him a kiss.
Rachel rose to her feet. “I’d better go. It’s almost Mag’s bedtime, and I don’t want her to lock me out.”
Shade went into the kitchen to make him a plate of food as the women said their goodbyes.
“Would she really?” Lily asked in shock.
“No,” Rachel laughed. “But she would make me wish she had by the time she quit fussing at me for making her get out of bed.” She reached into her pocket and pulled out the keys. “Here you go. I’ll stop by the store tomorrow to pick them up.”
“All right. Thanks again, Rachel.”
“Dinner more than made up for it,” Rachel replied, giving her a hug. “Bye, Shade.”
He nodded to her while spooning chili into a bowl, mentally debating with himself whether he should stop her. Cash would still be in the gazebo with Bliss.
Coming to a decision, he let her leave.
“I forgot something at the factory. I’ll be right back,” Shade told Lily.
“All right. I’ll put the chili back in the pot so it won’t get cold.”
He went out the door, easily seeing Rachel walking down the path and coming to a stop by the gazebo. She froze on the pathway for several seconds, and then she started walking again until she barreled into Train.
Shade leaned on the porch rail, watching the show as Train and Rachel talked briefly before they walked together down the pathway.
Bliss came out of the gazebo a minute later, stomping toward the clubhouse. When Cash came out, he didn’t go to the clubhouse, walking down toward the parking lot instead.
Shade stayed on the porch until he saw Train and Cash coming back up the pathway toward the clubhouse. Then he walked down his steps, wanting to have a word with Cash yet coming to a stop when he heard the two men talking.
“Train, I ... I…”
“Brother, if you don’t want me to touch her, all you have to do is ask.”
“I’m asking.”
“Cool, I’ll leave her to you then.”
Cash slung his arm around Train’s shoulder, and then Train helped Cash inside.
Shade waited a minute before entering behind them, giving Train enough time to get Cash upstairs. The brother was the most dependable of them. Train always managed to be there when he was needed; however, because he was so quiet, he tended to be overlooked. If Shade was in a life-or-death battle and could only pick one brother to back him up, it would be Train. His skills were as sharp as when he had left the military, and he had been lethal then. His skills as a chopper pilot were unequaled. He was a fucking legend.
Once, a helicopter he had been flying was transporting troops when he had been shot down behind enemy lines. The helicopters in the Navy were pieces of shit, but Train had managed to bring it down without any loss of life. He and the troops had spent five days behind enemy lines, and they had all made it out alive except one, a woman.
After Train came back downstairs, throwing himself down on the couch next to Jewell, Shade went up the steps, noticing the members’ eyes on him. He went to Cash’s bedroom door, rapping on it with his knuckles.
“Go away,” Cash snapped from inside.
“I want to talk,” Shade snapped back, opening the door.
“Then I’m happy. Go take your shower, and when you come back, I’ll show you how to make me even happier.” He smiled, taking her hands then helping her to her feet.
Her troubled gaze caught his as she went into the bathroom, closing the door behind her.
Shade took off his clothes then lay down on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. For a brief second, he had feared she had found out about him. If he wasn’t careful, his smothering attitude was going to have the opposite effect he wanted. Instead of making her not want to leave him, it might be what drove her away.
He couldn’t bring himself to treat her like his other women, because she was more than that to him. He couldn’t treat her like a true submissive, because he was constantly worried something he did would trigger a memory. The few times he had taken her the way he wanted, he had gone gently with her, wanting to ease her into it, but that had stopped when she had become pregnant. He had gone too far being overprotective after the break-in at Evie’s house and had become worse as her pregnancy had advanced.
They had married on Christmas day, and like a kid who was finally given a toy he had wanted for a long time, he had been excited about getting it yet afraid of touching or playing with it because he didn’t want to damage it.
Lily was asking him to trust her, to have faith that their marriage couldn’t be broken apart.
The bathroom door opened and Lily came out dressed in her nightgown, brushing her long, black hair as her eyes gave a soft apology.
To give her what she wanted, he would have to be willing to take the risk of losing her, and that wasn’t a risk he was going to take.
* * *
“You done for the night?” Train asked when Shade stretched from his bent position at the workstation.
“Finally.” Shade packed the order he had filled, placing it in the mail cart which the truck would pick up and take out early in the morning.
“You’re looking tired.”
Shade grimaced mockingly. “Guess I’m getting old.”
“Or you’re not getting enough sleep,” Train said shrewdly. “I thought your sleepless nights would be over when you married Lily.”
“I’ve been putting a lot of hours in since Cash wrecked his bike. The last month since he’s been home, he’s doing better, so I’m hoping he’s well enough that he can start working a few shifts soon.”
Train nodded. “You go ahead. I’ll finish this order I’m working on and lock up.”
“Thanks, Train.”
“Welcome. Shade … You know, if you need anything—anything at all—we’re all here for you, right?”
Shade cocked his head to the side. “Where did that come from?”
“Brooke has to be a thorn in your side, and with a kid on the way, it would be hard to handle that kind of problem.”
“If I find proof that Brooke had anything to do with Evie’s break-in last summer, believe me, brother, I won’t have a problem dealing with her the way she deserves,” Shade said ominously.
“When you make the decision, remember we’re here to have your back.”
“I will. See you tomorrow.” Shade went out of the factory, sucking in a deep breath. Thinking about Brooke brought back his frustration.
They hadn’t been able to tie her to the three men who had broken into Evie’s house. He was furious at himself for not leaving one alive to get information, but he hadn’t wanted to take a chance with Lily’s safety if bullets had started flying around the room.
As he walked up the path, he heard the blaring music from the clubhouse, but he wasn’t even tempted to go inside. He was too fucking tired.
He saw Cash leading Bliss into the gazebo. The brother had surprised him, since he had thought Cash would have made more attempts to see Rachel. Instead, he was seeking solace from the women in the clubhouse.
Shade opened the door to his house and saw Lily and Rachel sitting in the living room. As exhausted as he was, he couldn’t help smiling when Lily got up to give him a kiss.
Rachel rose to her feet. “I’d better go. It’s almost Mag’s bedtime, and I don’t want her to lock me out.”
Shade went into the kitchen to make him a plate of food as the women said their goodbyes.
“Would she really?” Lily asked in shock.
“No,” Rachel laughed. “But she would make me wish she had by the time she quit fussing at me for making her get out of bed.” She reached into her pocket and pulled out the keys. “Here you go. I’ll stop by the store tomorrow to pick them up.”
“All right. Thanks again, Rachel.”
“Dinner more than made up for it,” Rachel replied, giving her a hug. “Bye, Shade.”
He nodded to her while spooning chili into a bowl, mentally debating with himself whether he should stop her. Cash would still be in the gazebo with Bliss.
Coming to a decision, he let her leave.
“I forgot something at the factory. I’ll be right back,” Shade told Lily.
“All right. I’ll put the chili back in the pot so it won’t get cold.”
He went out the door, easily seeing Rachel walking down the path and coming to a stop by the gazebo. She froze on the pathway for several seconds, and then she started walking again until she barreled into Train.
Shade leaned on the porch rail, watching the show as Train and Rachel talked briefly before they walked together down the pathway.
Bliss came out of the gazebo a minute later, stomping toward the clubhouse. When Cash came out, he didn’t go to the clubhouse, walking down toward the parking lot instead.
Shade stayed on the porch until he saw Train and Cash coming back up the pathway toward the clubhouse. Then he walked down his steps, wanting to have a word with Cash yet coming to a stop when he heard the two men talking.
“Train, I ... I…”
“Brother, if you don’t want me to touch her, all you have to do is ask.”
“I’m asking.”
“Cool, I’ll leave her to you then.”
Cash slung his arm around Train’s shoulder, and then Train helped Cash inside.
Shade waited a minute before entering behind them, giving Train enough time to get Cash upstairs. The brother was the most dependable of them. Train always managed to be there when he was needed; however, because he was so quiet, he tended to be overlooked. If Shade was in a life-or-death battle and could only pick one brother to back him up, it would be Train. His skills were as sharp as when he had left the military, and he had been lethal then. His skills as a chopper pilot were unequaled. He was a fucking legend.
Once, a helicopter he had been flying was transporting troops when he had been shot down behind enemy lines. The helicopters in the Navy were pieces of shit, but Train had managed to bring it down without any loss of life. He and the troops had spent five days behind enemy lines, and they had all made it out alive except one, a woman.
After Train came back downstairs, throwing himself down on the couch next to Jewell, Shade went up the steps, noticing the members’ eyes on him. He went to Cash’s bedroom door, rapping on it with his knuckles.
“Go away,” Cash snapped from inside.
“I want to talk,” Shade snapped back, opening the door.
