“Now?” he asked as he stood in front of me.
“My sister’s wedding rehearsal dinner is today. I wasn’t going to go. I didn’t want to go alone.”
“I’ll go with you.”
“Are you sure? It won’t be fun and I can’t promise that at some point someone won’t make me cry.” I smiled nervously.
Shane ran the pad of his thumb over my cheek.
“If anyone makes you cry, I will make them cry, okay?”
I laughed and wrapped my fingers around his.
“Thank you. I should get dressed.” I took a small step back and let his hand fall from mine. I wasn’t sure what I was feeling for Shane but after he left yesterday, I was scared to trust that he wouldn’t do it again.
“You look great.”
I made a face at him and laughed.
“I’m sure no one would agree with you, but thank you. I’m going to slip a dress on.”
I took a couple more steps back before turning around and making my way into my bedroom. I rummaged through my closet, tossing dresses on the floor as I struggled to find something that would look decent. I grabbed my favorite and hoped it would look dressy enough for the event.
“How’s this?” I asked as I opened the door to my room. I was standing in front of him in a pale yellow sundress with a white cardigan over it.
“You look like sunshine.” He smiled and stood slowly. Pink crept across my cheeks as I blushed.
“Why do you call me that?” I cocked my head to the side.
Shane stepped closer to me and grabbed my hand, lacing his fingers in mine. “Come on.”
We rode in silence as they made our way across town toward Bella’s, an Italian restaurant that would be catering Gail’s wedding. My knuckles blanched white as I gripped the steering wheel. I could feel Shane’s eyes on me.
“You’re a natural. You should have no trouble passing your driving test.”
I smiled and looked over at him.
“Don’t patronize me. You practically keep your hand on the door handle just in case you need to jump out.”
He laughed and shook his head.
“I’ve been in scarier situations.”
We pulled into the parking lot of the restaurant as my face went serious again. I put the car in park and turned to face him in my seat.
“If you want to leave at any time, just let me know. I completely understand if you can’t make it through the meal. I’m not sure I will.” My words ran together as I spoke so rapidly I was sure he couldn’t make sense of anything I said. He leaned over and wrapped his hand behind my neck and pulled my face to his as he pressed his forehead against mine. My hands fell on his chest as my eyes fluttered closed. Shane’s heart thudded wildly under my fingers. All worry and fear left me as I focused on Shane being so close to me and every ounce of my body begged he would kiss me, but his lips never touched mine.
“What are you doing?” I asked as I slowly opened my eyes. The side of his lips curved into a smile.
“I’m not going anywhere, sunshine. I said I would be here for you and I will be. Now, if you decide you don’t want to be here, we can leave. All you have to do is say the word and we will run out of those front doors and never look back.”
“A word. That’s perfect. We should have a secret word so we can make up an excuse to leave if it gets too hard.”
He laughed and kissed me softly on the cheek, his lips barely brushing against my skin, but it set me alive with fire under his touch.
“Sure. How about Lima. It’s part of the military phonetic alphabet. L for leave.”
“Fine. That’s good. Leema? Okay.” I put my hand on the door handle before glancing back at him. He just shook his head and laughed before getting out and making his way to my side of the car and pulling open my door. His hand found mine and he gave it a reassuring squeeze as he guided me to the front door of the restaurant.
Shane
March 24, 2010, Wedding Rehearsal Dinner
“Jenn!” Gail called out from their long table in the center of the restaurant. She rushed to our sides with a vibrant fake smile plastered across her face. “I didn’t think you would come.” She pulled Jenn in for an awkward hug.
“Me either.” Jenn smiled back through clenched teeth.
“Who is this?” Gail’s eyes drifted over me. I ran my thumb over the back of Jenn’s hand as she squeezed onto me tightly. I tried to stay away from her. Blowing her off would have been easier for her. It would have hurt her less in the end. It’s easier to say good-bye to an ass**le than to worry about someone you care about. I still wasn’t sure she did care. But in the end, it didn’t matter. I cared and I couldn’t stay away no matter how badly it would all end.
“This is Shane.” She cleared her throat and looked up to me.
“Nice to meet you.” I held out my free hand to Gail who shook it a little too enthusiastically.
“Likewise.”
“So, where should we sit?” Jenn asked as she pushed herself into my side.
“Um…how about across from Mom and Dad? I’m sure they will be excited to meet your new friend.”
“Gail, you wouldn’t happen be serving leema beans would you?”
I started laughing and shook my head. Gail looked back at Jenn with her eyebrows drawn together.
“You mean lima beans? The answer is no. This is a high-class wedding not some hillbilly barbecue.”
I cleared my throat and faked a cough as I gave Jenn’s hand a reassuring squeeze.
“It will be fine. I got your six.” I winked at her. She gave me a smile and pulled me over to the chairs in front of her parents.
“Mom, this is Shane. Shane, this is my mother, Dorothy.”
I held out my hand. Jenn’s mother took it, as she looked me over.
“Nice to meet you, Shane.” She smiled politely.
“And this is my father, Walter.” Walter stood before taking my hand. “Quite a grip you got there, son.” His eyes looked over me. “Military?”
“Yes, sir. Army.”
“Well, thank you for your service.”
I nodded and pulled out Jenn’s chair before taking the seat next to hers.
“Military, huh?” All eyes shot to the man who was standing behind my seat. “Interesting.” He continued on to his seat and kissed Gail on the cheek before settling into his seat.
“Not really.” I picked up my glass of water and took a sip. “Just a job.”
“Well, I commend you for fighting in a war like this one. Must be awful sleeping at night with all of that innocent blood on your hands.”
“Thomas!” Jenn shot up from her chair and threw her cloth napkin on her plate. Thomas held up his hands in mock surrender. My eyebrows pulled together as I looked from Jenn to Thomas.
“It was a joke, Jennifer. Calm yourself. We are all family here.”
“Thomas?” Everything began to click into place. I knew her ex had done something horrible to her but I never imagined it was leaving her for her own sister. I slowly pushed back my chair and stood, my six-foot frame towering over everyone. Thomas swallowed hard, afraid of the repercussions from his comment. I wasn’t mad about the ignorant war remark. Most people didn’t understand what going to war was like and they couldn’t fathom what it actually took to protect their freedom, their right to say ignorant things. I was ready to kill when I discovered that Thomas was the one who had hurt Jenn. I had been through a lot with Chelsea, but her betrayal paled in comparison to what this man must have put Jenn through.
I smiled and reached over, pulling Jenn’s chair out for her a little further and coaxing her to sit.
“Lima?” she whispered. I shook my head and smiled.
“Not a chance. This just got interesting,” I whispered in her ear.
She sighed and forced a smile as she sat back in her seat, grabbing her napkin and laying it over her lap.
“Never a dull moment!” Her father laughed and everyone else followed suit.
I reached under the table and grabbed Jenn’s hand, pulling it over onto my lap. She glanced at me and I smiled, rubbing my fingers over her soft skin.
“How about a toast to the happy couple.” Walter held up his glass as all eyes fell on Gail and Thomas. Gail had a scowl on her face, embarrassed by her fiancé. Everyone grabbed their champagne flutes and raised them in the air.
“To the future Mr. and Mrs. Sullivan.” The guests sipped their drinks and I drank mine empty, my eyes locked on Thomas, who whispered something to Gail before standing and making his way to the restrooms.
“I’ll be right back.” I gave Jenn a quick peck on the cheek before following behind him.
He slipped into the bathroom and I glanced around, making sure they were the only ones in the room. When I was certain we were alone, I leaned my back against the door and waited. As Thomas exited the stall, he paused, his eyes taking me in. I was nearly twice his size.
“I apologize for my flippant comment earlier.” He smiled as he washed his hands. I pushed off the door and stepped closer.
“Trust me, it was already forgotten.”
“You two make an interesting couple. You don’t seem like Jenn’s type.”
“What type is that? I don’t seem like the kind of man who would betray her? Break her heart?” But my chest tightened as the realization that I was that man crept into the forefront of my thoughts. I was keeping a very big secret from Jenn and would be gone in only a few days.
“Whoa. I don’t know what she told you.” Thomas chuckled nervously as he grabbed a towel and dried his hands.
“She didn’t tell me anything.”
“Ahh,” Thomas threw his paper towel in the trashcan by the door. “She still has feelings for me, is that it?”
My arms shot up and grabbed the collar of Thomas’s blue polo shirt. I raised my arms until he was eye level with me.
“You can be a cocky ass**le to me. I deal with little pricks like you all of the time. But you leave Jenn the hell alone or the next time you take a piss, it will be through a f**king tube. Do we understand each other?”
“Perfectly.”
I let go of his shirt and shook my head in disgust as I pulled open the door and left the bathroom. As I rounded the corner to the dining room, I was smiling. I slipped back into my seat and took a drink from my champagne glass that had been refilled while I was gone. A few minutes later, Thomas emerged, his face pale and his shirt wrinkled.
Jenn’s hand found mine and she gave it a small squeeze.
“What was that about?” she whispered as she took a sip from her glass. I shrugged and tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear.
“Guy talk.”
She furrowed her brow but didn’t respond. She hadn’t confided in me about Thomas and had no reason to think there were any problems between the two of us, besides his ignorant remark. The wait staff was now placing plates of food in front of us to taste and everyone’s attention was on the meal.
“First we will be sampling the appetizers. We have crab-stuffed mushrooms, oysters Rockefeller, and steamed mussels,” the server announced. “Enjoy.”
I smiled at Jenn when she made a face at the seafood. She dug her fork into the mushrooms and moaned at how delicious they were as she popped one into her mouth. I laughed and shook my head as I took a bite.
“What?”
“That good, huh?” I shoved a large chunk of mushroom into my mouth and mocked her noises, causing her to choke on a sip of water.
“Here. Take these.” She used her fork to push her oysters and muscles onto my plate as we both laughed.
Walter cleared his throat and both of our heads shot up immediately to meet his irritated gaze.
“Sorry,” I laughed, as Jenn dabbed the tears of laughter from her eyes.
“So, Jenn, will your new boyfriend be joining you at the wedding?” Gail asked. Thomas’s eyes snapped to mine.
“He’s not…” She looked down at her plate nervously, embarrassed that her family was referring to me as her boyfriend.
“I won’t be in town. I have to head back to North Carolina on the twenty-seventh,” I answered for her before taking another bite of food.
“That’s a shame. Her plus one will go unused,” Gail replied with a smirk.
The wait staff made their rounds collecting our plates as someone followed with main course samples. Jenn held up her wine glass to signal she needed a refill.
“How long have you been together?” I asked Gail, but my eyes locked on Thomas.
“A few months.” Thomas smirked.
Jenn’s eyes watered for an entirely different reason now as she stared down at her plate with a sampling of miso-glazed salmon and filet mignon. She sniffled and picked up her knife, beginning to cut the steak into tiny pieces. I leaned in closely, my lips brushing against her earlobe.
“Don’t cry, Jenn,” I whispered. “I made you a promise and I intend to keep it.”
She smiled as she glanced across the table at Thomas, and I knew she wanted me to shut him up just as badly as I wanted to.
“Not a fan of steak?” I asked, hoping to take our minds off her past. I didn’t like the idea of her thinking about Thomas while I was with her. She shook her head as she chewed. “How ’bout I take you out for dinner after we leave here? Wherever you want.”
“Wherever I want?” She cocked her eyebrow and grinned wickedly.
“I promise.”
We continued the meal, lost in our own private conversation. It took every ounce of self-control not to leap across the table and strangle Thomas. I could tell from my brief encounters with him and Gail that they deserved each other. Jenn should consider herself lucky to not be stuck with someone like him. I know she didn’t see it that way. Not yet. But hopefully she would. Hopefully, she would realize that she wasn’t meant to be with Thomas.
“My sister’s wedding rehearsal dinner is today. I wasn’t going to go. I didn’t want to go alone.”
“I’ll go with you.”
“Are you sure? It won’t be fun and I can’t promise that at some point someone won’t make me cry.” I smiled nervously.
Shane ran the pad of his thumb over my cheek.
“If anyone makes you cry, I will make them cry, okay?”
I laughed and wrapped my fingers around his.
“Thank you. I should get dressed.” I took a small step back and let his hand fall from mine. I wasn’t sure what I was feeling for Shane but after he left yesterday, I was scared to trust that he wouldn’t do it again.
“You look great.”
I made a face at him and laughed.
“I’m sure no one would agree with you, but thank you. I’m going to slip a dress on.”
I took a couple more steps back before turning around and making my way into my bedroom. I rummaged through my closet, tossing dresses on the floor as I struggled to find something that would look decent. I grabbed my favorite and hoped it would look dressy enough for the event.
“How’s this?” I asked as I opened the door to my room. I was standing in front of him in a pale yellow sundress with a white cardigan over it.
“You look like sunshine.” He smiled and stood slowly. Pink crept across my cheeks as I blushed.
“Why do you call me that?” I cocked my head to the side.
Shane stepped closer to me and grabbed my hand, lacing his fingers in mine. “Come on.”
We rode in silence as they made our way across town toward Bella’s, an Italian restaurant that would be catering Gail’s wedding. My knuckles blanched white as I gripped the steering wheel. I could feel Shane’s eyes on me.
“You’re a natural. You should have no trouble passing your driving test.”
I smiled and looked over at him.
“Don’t patronize me. You practically keep your hand on the door handle just in case you need to jump out.”
He laughed and shook his head.
“I’ve been in scarier situations.”
We pulled into the parking lot of the restaurant as my face went serious again. I put the car in park and turned to face him in my seat.
“If you want to leave at any time, just let me know. I completely understand if you can’t make it through the meal. I’m not sure I will.” My words ran together as I spoke so rapidly I was sure he couldn’t make sense of anything I said. He leaned over and wrapped his hand behind my neck and pulled my face to his as he pressed his forehead against mine. My hands fell on his chest as my eyes fluttered closed. Shane’s heart thudded wildly under my fingers. All worry and fear left me as I focused on Shane being so close to me and every ounce of my body begged he would kiss me, but his lips never touched mine.
“What are you doing?” I asked as I slowly opened my eyes. The side of his lips curved into a smile.
“I’m not going anywhere, sunshine. I said I would be here for you and I will be. Now, if you decide you don’t want to be here, we can leave. All you have to do is say the word and we will run out of those front doors and never look back.”
“A word. That’s perfect. We should have a secret word so we can make up an excuse to leave if it gets too hard.”
He laughed and kissed me softly on the cheek, his lips barely brushing against my skin, but it set me alive with fire under his touch.
“Sure. How about Lima. It’s part of the military phonetic alphabet. L for leave.”
“Fine. That’s good. Leema? Okay.” I put my hand on the door handle before glancing back at him. He just shook his head and laughed before getting out and making his way to my side of the car and pulling open my door. His hand found mine and he gave it a reassuring squeeze as he guided me to the front door of the restaurant.
Shane
March 24, 2010, Wedding Rehearsal Dinner
“Jenn!” Gail called out from their long table in the center of the restaurant. She rushed to our sides with a vibrant fake smile plastered across her face. “I didn’t think you would come.” She pulled Jenn in for an awkward hug.
“Me either.” Jenn smiled back through clenched teeth.
“Who is this?” Gail’s eyes drifted over me. I ran my thumb over the back of Jenn’s hand as she squeezed onto me tightly. I tried to stay away from her. Blowing her off would have been easier for her. It would have hurt her less in the end. It’s easier to say good-bye to an ass**le than to worry about someone you care about. I still wasn’t sure she did care. But in the end, it didn’t matter. I cared and I couldn’t stay away no matter how badly it would all end.
“This is Shane.” She cleared her throat and looked up to me.
“Nice to meet you.” I held out my free hand to Gail who shook it a little too enthusiastically.
“Likewise.”
“So, where should we sit?” Jenn asked as she pushed herself into my side.
“Um…how about across from Mom and Dad? I’m sure they will be excited to meet your new friend.”
“Gail, you wouldn’t happen be serving leema beans would you?”
I started laughing and shook my head. Gail looked back at Jenn with her eyebrows drawn together.
“You mean lima beans? The answer is no. This is a high-class wedding not some hillbilly barbecue.”
I cleared my throat and faked a cough as I gave Jenn’s hand a reassuring squeeze.
“It will be fine. I got your six.” I winked at her. She gave me a smile and pulled me over to the chairs in front of her parents.
“Mom, this is Shane. Shane, this is my mother, Dorothy.”
I held out my hand. Jenn’s mother took it, as she looked me over.
“Nice to meet you, Shane.” She smiled politely.
“And this is my father, Walter.” Walter stood before taking my hand. “Quite a grip you got there, son.” His eyes looked over me. “Military?”
“Yes, sir. Army.”
“Well, thank you for your service.”
I nodded and pulled out Jenn’s chair before taking the seat next to hers.
“Military, huh?” All eyes shot to the man who was standing behind my seat. “Interesting.” He continued on to his seat and kissed Gail on the cheek before settling into his seat.
“Not really.” I picked up my glass of water and took a sip. “Just a job.”
“Well, I commend you for fighting in a war like this one. Must be awful sleeping at night with all of that innocent blood on your hands.”
“Thomas!” Jenn shot up from her chair and threw her cloth napkin on her plate. Thomas held up his hands in mock surrender. My eyebrows pulled together as I looked from Jenn to Thomas.
“It was a joke, Jennifer. Calm yourself. We are all family here.”
“Thomas?” Everything began to click into place. I knew her ex had done something horrible to her but I never imagined it was leaving her for her own sister. I slowly pushed back my chair and stood, my six-foot frame towering over everyone. Thomas swallowed hard, afraid of the repercussions from his comment. I wasn’t mad about the ignorant war remark. Most people didn’t understand what going to war was like and they couldn’t fathom what it actually took to protect their freedom, their right to say ignorant things. I was ready to kill when I discovered that Thomas was the one who had hurt Jenn. I had been through a lot with Chelsea, but her betrayal paled in comparison to what this man must have put Jenn through.
I smiled and reached over, pulling Jenn’s chair out for her a little further and coaxing her to sit.
“Lima?” she whispered. I shook my head and smiled.
“Not a chance. This just got interesting,” I whispered in her ear.
She sighed and forced a smile as she sat back in her seat, grabbing her napkin and laying it over her lap.
“Never a dull moment!” Her father laughed and everyone else followed suit.
I reached under the table and grabbed Jenn’s hand, pulling it over onto my lap. She glanced at me and I smiled, rubbing my fingers over her soft skin.
“How about a toast to the happy couple.” Walter held up his glass as all eyes fell on Gail and Thomas. Gail had a scowl on her face, embarrassed by her fiancé. Everyone grabbed their champagne flutes and raised them in the air.
“To the future Mr. and Mrs. Sullivan.” The guests sipped their drinks and I drank mine empty, my eyes locked on Thomas, who whispered something to Gail before standing and making his way to the restrooms.
“I’ll be right back.” I gave Jenn a quick peck on the cheek before following behind him.
He slipped into the bathroom and I glanced around, making sure they were the only ones in the room. When I was certain we were alone, I leaned my back against the door and waited. As Thomas exited the stall, he paused, his eyes taking me in. I was nearly twice his size.
“I apologize for my flippant comment earlier.” He smiled as he washed his hands. I pushed off the door and stepped closer.
“Trust me, it was already forgotten.”
“You two make an interesting couple. You don’t seem like Jenn’s type.”
“What type is that? I don’t seem like the kind of man who would betray her? Break her heart?” But my chest tightened as the realization that I was that man crept into the forefront of my thoughts. I was keeping a very big secret from Jenn and would be gone in only a few days.
“Whoa. I don’t know what she told you.” Thomas chuckled nervously as he grabbed a towel and dried his hands.
“She didn’t tell me anything.”
“Ahh,” Thomas threw his paper towel in the trashcan by the door. “She still has feelings for me, is that it?”
My arms shot up and grabbed the collar of Thomas’s blue polo shirt. I raised my arms until he was eye level with me.
“You can be a cocky ass**le to me. I deal with little pricks like you all of the time. But you leave Jenn the hell alone or the next time you take a piss, it will be through a f**king tube. Do we understand each other?”
“Perfectly.”
I let go of his shirt and shook my head in disgust as I pulled open the door and left the bathroom. As I rounded the corner to the dining room, I was smiling. I slipped back into my seat and took a drink from my champagne glass that had been refilled while I was gone. A few minutes later, Thomas emerged, his face pale and his shirt wrinkled.
Jenn’s hand found mine and she gave it a small squeeze.
“What was that about?” she whispered as she took a sip from her glass. I shrugged and tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear.
“Guy talk.”
She furrowed her brow but didn’t respond. She hadn’t confided in me about Thomas and had no reason to think there were any problems between the two of us, besides his ignorant remark. The wait staff was now placing plates of food in front of us to taste and everyone’s attention was on the meal.
“First we will be sampling the appetizers. We have crab-stuffed mushrooms, oysters Rockefeller, and steamed mussels,” the server announced. “Enjoy.”
I smiled at Jenn when she made a face at the seafood. She dug her fork into the mushrooms and moaned at how delicious they were as she popped one into her mouth. I laughed and shook my head as I took a bite.
“What?”
“That good, huh?” I shoved a large chunk of mushroom into my mouth and mocked her noises, causing her to choke on a sip of water.
“Here. Take these.” She used her fork to push her oysters and muscles onto my plate as we both laughed.
Walter cleared his throat and both of our heads shot up immediately to meet his irritated gaze.
“Sorry,” I laughed, as Jenn dabbed the tears of laughter from her eyes.
“So, Jenn, will your new boyfriend be joining you at the wedding?” Gail asked. Thomas’s eyes snapped to mine.
“He’s not…” She looked down at her plate nervously, embarrassed that her family was referring to me as her boyfriend.
“I won’t be in town. I have to head back to North Carolina on the twenty-seventh,” I answered for her before taking another bite of food.
“That’s a shame. Her plus one will go unused,” Gail replied with a smirk.
The wait staff made their rounds collecting our plates as someone followed with main course samples. Jenn held up her wine glass to signal she needed a refill.
“How long have you been together?” I asked Gail, but my eyes locked on Thomas.
“A few months.” Thomas smirked.
Jenn’s eyes watered for an entirely different reason now as she stared down at her plate with a sampling of miso-glazed salmon and filet mignon. She sniffled and picked up her knife, beginning to cut the steak into tiny pieces. I leaned in closely, my lips brushing against her earlobe.
“Don’t cry, Jenn,” I whispered. “I made you a promise and I intend to keep it.”
She smiled as she glanced across the table at Thomas, and I knew she wanted me to shut him up just as badly as I wanted to.
“Not a fan of steak?” I asked, hoping to take our minds off her past. I didn’t like the idea of her thinking about Thomas while I was with her. She shook her head as she chewed. “How ’bout I take you out for dinner after we leave here? Wherever you want.”
“Wherever I want?” She cocked her eyebrow and grinned wickedly.
“I promise.”
We continued the meal, lost in our own private conversation. It took every ounce of self-control not to leap across the table and strangle Thomas. I could tell from my brief encounters with him and Gail that they deserved each other. Jenn should consider herself lucky to not be stuck with someone like him. I know she didn’t see it that way. Not yet. But hopefully she would. Hopefully, she would realize that she wasn’t meant to be with Thomas.
