Warmth in Ice
Page 7

Ashley mercifully changed the subject and I was able to forget the nagging questions for another time.
“Is that Justin Bieber on the wall behind you?” Clay asked, smirking. I looked over my shoulder and groaned.
“I had almost forgotten he was there. Thanks for reminding me,” I grumbled, rolling my desk chair from side to side.
Clay laughed and my toes curled at the sound. Thank god for Skype, otherwise I would have gotten in my Corolla and headed for Florida by now. But seeing his face on the computer screen, while not nearly as good as having him here in the flesh, was pretty damn great.
“I’m living with a real life Disney princess, Clay. I have never been surrounded by so much pink in my entire life. It’s like someone spilled Pepto-Bismal all over the place,” I complained good-naturedly.
“It doesn’t look so bad,” Clay said and I rolled my eyes.
“That’s because you’re not here to see it in person. Trust me, you’d agree with me if you could get a load of the seven dwarf figurines for yourself,” I chuckled. Clay smiled and I tried not to let the miles that separated us bring me down.
“I wish I was there, baby. But you seem to be doing just fine. Not that I ever doubted it,” Clay said warmly and I touched the screen wishing I could feel the weight of his hair through my fingers.
“How’s the house? It looks decent enough,” I remarked. There was movement and the screen went lopsided as Clay stood up to give me a sweeping view of his new bedroom.
“You need some pictures on the wall. Maybe some pretty throw pillows. Girl the place up for me, babe,” I teased. Clay snorted.
“I’ll wait until you come for a visit and let you have free reign,” he promised, though his words made my heart ache a bit. We had made ambiguous plans for me to fly down and see him over fall break, but I wasn’t sure if that would be okay with my parents. And their approval was essential given they’d be paying for it.
But I didn’t want to rain on his parade, so I only nodded and made noises of agreement.
After giving Clay the grand tour of my cubbyhole, our conversation inevitably turned more serious. It was already ten o’clock and I knew Ashley would be back soon. She had tried to convince me to go to some sorority rush meeting but I had politely declined. I had no interest in any of that.
“I miss you so much, Maggie,” Clay said softly, leaning toward the screen. His face filled my vision and my heart hurt at the sadness in his eyes.
“I miss you too,” I whispered even though I was alone. “Do you think…I know it’s probably asking a lot, but that maybe you could come up here for a visit?” I asked him, already fearing the answer.
Clay closed his eyes and I could read the pain on his face clearly. This was the expression he wore when he had to disappoint me.
“I don’t think that’s an option for me right now. I want to…more than you know…but with just moving into Rose Heights and getting started with case management and meeting with my new therapist…” he trailed off and I knew he hated to deny me anything.
I felt selfish for even bringing it up. It wasn’t fair to ask that of him when he was trying so hard to make things right for the both of us. But I couldn’t help the twinge of resentful disappointment all the same.
“I know, Clay. I’m being silly. We’ll see each other soon,” I said, making a promise I didn’t know either of us could keep.
Clay sighed deeply. “I love you, Maggie. More than anything,” he told me, his words coming out as a plea.
“I love you,” I replied just as earnestly.
Before we could say anything else, the door swung open. Ashley ran into the room, followed by two guys I didn’t recognize.
“Maggie, you need to come with us! Josh and Brent live one floor down and they want to take us to a party off campus!” Ashley cried, pulling on my arm.
Clay’s jaw tightened as the two unknown guys came into view. Ashley giggled when she realized who I was talking to.
“Is this Clay? Oh my god, Maggie, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt!” Ashley apologized, giving my boyfriend a pretty smile. Sometimes it was easy to forget the effect my boy had on the opposite sex. I tried to ignore the quick flash of jealousy that sparked deep in my gut. Because jealousy was a useless emotion and one that was completely unnecessary.
Especially since I picked up on his own feelings of jealousy as Clay eyed Josh and Brent. They stood awkwardly with sheepish smiles on their faces. They were cute. But they weren’t Clayton Reed.
“I don’t think so…”I began but Clay cut me off.
“You go on, Mags. I’ve got to get going anyway,” he said, his voice clipped and annoyed.
Was he angry with me?
“I’d rather talk to you,” I said, dropping my words into a whisper. Clay clenched his jaw and shook his head. Shit, I didn’t like the look on his face…at all.
“Go have fun. We can talk tomorrow,” Clay said, eyeing the guys again. Christ, if looks could kill.
I didn’t want to end the conversation like this. And not with an audience. I turned to my roommate and gave her a pointed look.
Ashley, who perhaps wasn’t as clueless as she let on, got to her feet. “We’ll wait for you in the lobby! Bye Clay!” she wiggled her fingers at my boyfriend who had become cool and distant.
Josh and Brent gave me a quick smile before following Ashley out into the hallway. I looked at Clay, who was obviously trying to get himself under control.