Her laughter follows me as I go out to the bar. I swear she is crazy. Reaching for all the condiment holders, I bring them to the back to refill them with Declan flooding my thoughts. I still can’t believe it happened and above all else, I can’t believe how patient and sweet he was with me. I was nervous, scared, and a little freaked out, but he took care of me, asked for permission, and pleased me in such a beautiful way. It was perfect. He was perfect. I’ve never felt that good in my whole life. I’ve had an orgasm before, brought on by a good romance novel and myself, but the way he felt, his strong arm, skilled fingers between my thighs, still has my toes curling in my shoes. But my favorite part was still touching my lips to his beautiful body. He was so hard, so hot…
My body feels all tingly, and I love the feeling. I can’t wait for the next time we do it, and maybe I’ll do what Fiona has suggested. The thought makes me shiver with anticipation, but I’m sure that Declan will be patient and coax me through the experience. He was just so amazing, afterwards. When I was tucked in my bed, still giggling over it all, he texted to wish me goodnight, and I swear another piece of me fell completely for him.
I know, it’s insane, but he is making it so easy to do it, and that scares me. I don’t want this to be some quick romance, and it’s over. I obviously like this guy, a lot, and I could see myself falling head over heels in love with him. I know I can, but I’m worried that I’m rushing this, and that he won’t feel the same in the end. I could throw all my chips in while he folds. It’s a scary thing, this love shit, but I can’t help but want every single scary part of it… as long as it’s with Declan.
Cutting up the limes, lemons, and oranges, I put them in their respected areas while Fiona preps the stuff for the salads. Aunt Shelia should be in soon to start cooking for the dinner rush but for the time being, both of us work, quietly, lost in our own thoughts. While I think of Declan, I know Fiona is thinking of Kane. She’s still hurting and as much as she tries to act like he doesn’t matter anymore, I know she is lying. I heard her crying when I got in last night, and I think her feelings are deeper than she has let on. I think she does love him.
“Have you spoken to Kane?” I ask.
She glares over at me, shaking her head as she angrily cuts the cucumbers. “Fuck no, fuckin’ eejit.”
I smile even though she is upset. I just love how thick her accent gets when she is angry. “Has he tried texting you?”
“Yeah, a bunch, and I’ve ignored it all.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah, screw him,” she mutters before going back to work. I do the same and I’m almost done when she asks, “Have you told him?”
I look up from where I am stuffing cherries in the little bins. “Told who what?”
“Declan… have you told him that you’re a virgin?”
I shake my head. “No, why should I? I don’t want to admit that I’m extremely inexperienced. That’s embarrassing.”
“It would probably be a good idea. It is something you share with someone you’re involved with.”
“It’s only been a month though.”
“He got you off, Amberlyn. He’ll expect more and more and so will you. Then you guys will get to the moment of penetration, you’ll freak out, he’ll be like what’s wrong, you’ll start crying, and then you’re first time is a fuckin’ mess.”
I can only blink at her. “You’ve given way too much thought to my first time.”
She smiles. “Of course, it should be magical—rainbows and sunshine and unicorns doing it or something.”
I roll my eyes as I scoff. “Oh my goodness, Fiona.”
“No really, you need to tell him. Give him time to prepare.”
“Prepare?” I ask, confused.
“Yes, he has to make sure to ruin you for the rest of the male race.”
My eyebrow cock. “Is that what happened with your first time?”
She laughs. “Fuck no, he did me in the girls’ bathroom and thrust so hard that I hit my head on the bathroom mirror, shattering it! Everyone called me ‘thrust and bust’ after that.”
I can’t even hold in my laughter. “Thrust and bust?”
“Yeah,” she says, shaking her head. “It was horrible. Thankfully, I moved on from the horrid experience and had some pretty great ones. Kane was the best, though. He could have me screamin’ in two-point-one seconds with just a little touch. Jesus,” she says, her eyes falling shut some.
“Wow,” I say, and then she snaps her eyes back open.
“Fuckin’ eejit! We are having sex and we aren’t together? I’m no fuckin’ slag, damn it!”
“No, you’re not,” I agree.
“Arsehole.”
“For sure,” I say.
When she glances up at me, she grins and I smile back, but then her smile drops as she sets me with a look. “You have to tell him though.”
I shrug my shoulders before I pick up both trays. “I don’t see a reason to tell him that I’m a virgin. It isn’t like we are having sex.”
“Yet,” Fiona adds pointing a knife at me.
“Yet,” I say with a smile. “When the time comes, I’ll tell him.”
She nods and goes back to cutting but when I turn to head to the bar to put everything up, I see the last two people I want to see at that moment. Declan is standing with wide eyes, looking completely gorgeous with a jar of what looks like Goober. While I am excited to see him and even more excited to see a can of Goober, I can’t help but assume he heard what I said. And judging by my Aunt Shelia’s expression, it’s safe to say she did, too.
And there goes the trays.
Fuck me.
Crashing at my feet, fruit goes everywhere as Fiona yells, “What the hell—oh crap.” I look back at her with wide eyes, my legs drenched in the juices while my face burns with embarrassment, and all she does is shrugs.
“Hiya, Ma! Declan.”
Declan doesn’t say anything as Aunt Shelia comes to my rescue, fussing over me and helping me clean up. I can’t look at him. My heart is pounding in my chest, my hands shaky, and I have no clue what to say. I planned this to be different. I thought we’d be lying in the afterglow of my first time, and I would tell him that way. I’m beyond embarrassed by my inexperience, and I sure as hell didn’t want my aunt and boyfriend to know this.
My body feels all tingly, and I love the feeling. I can’t wait for the next time we do it, and maybe I’ll do what Fiona has suggested. The thought makes me shiver with anticipation, but I’m sure that Declan will be patient and coax me through the experience. He was just so amazing, afterwards. When I was tucked in my bed, still giggling over it all, he texted to wish me goodnight, and I swear another piece of me fell completely for him.
I know, it’s insane, but he is making it so easy to do it, and that scares me. I don’t want this to be some quick romance, and it’s over. I obviously like this guy, a lot, and I could see myself falling head over heels in love with him. I know I can, but I’m worried that I’m rushing this, and that he won’t feel the same in the end. I could throw all my chips in while he folds. It’s a scary thing, this love shit, but I can’t help but want every single scary part of it… as long as it’s with Declan.
Cutting up the limes, lemons, and oranges, I put them in their respected areas while Fiona preps the stuff for the salads. Aunt Shelia should be in soon to start cooking for the dinner rush but for the time being, both of us work, quietly, lost in our own thoughts. While I think of Declan, I know Fiona is thinking of Kane. She’s still hurting and as much as she tries to act like he doesn’t matter anymore, I know she is lying. I heard her crying when I got in last night, and I think her feelings are deeper than she has let on. I think she does love him.
“Have you spoken to Kane?” I ask.
She glares over at me, shaking her head as she angrily cuts the cucumbers. “Fuck no, fuckin’ eejit.”
I smile even though she is upset. I just love how thick her accent gets when she is angry. “Has he tried texting you?”
“Yeah, a bunch, and I’ve ignored it all.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah, screw him,” she mutters before going back to work. I do the same and I’m almost done when she asks, “Have you told him?”
I look up from where I am stuffing cherries in the little bins. “Told who what?”
“Declan… have you told him that you’re a virgin?”
I shake my head. “No, why should I? I don’t want to admit that I’m extremely inexperienced. That’s embarrassing.”
“It would probably be a good idea. It is something you share with someone you’re involved with.”
“It’s only been a month though.”
“He got you off, Amberlyn. He’ll expect more and more and so will you. Then you guys will get to the moment of penetration, you’ll freak out, he’ll be like what’s wrong, you’ll start crying, and then you’re first time is a fuckin’ mess.”
I can only blink at her. “You’ve given way too much thought to my first time.”
She smiles. “Of course, it should be magical—rainbows and sunshine and unicorns doing it or something.”
I roll my eyes as I scoff. “Oh my goodness, Fiona.”
“No really, you need to tell him. Give him time to prepare.”
“Prepare?” I ask, confused.
“Yes, he has to make sure to ruin you for the rest of the male race.”
My eyebrow cock. “Is that what happened with your first time?”
She laughs. “Fuck no, he did me in the girls’ bathroom and thrust so hard that I hit my head on the bathroom mirror, shattering it! Everyone called me ‘thrust and bust’ after that.”
I can’t even hold in my laughter. “Thrust and bust?”
“Yeah,” she says, shaking her head. “It was horrible. Thankfully, I moved on from the horrid experience and had some pretty great ones. Kane was the best, though. He could have me screamin’ in two-point-one seconds with just a little touch. Jesus,” she says, her eyes falling shut some.
“Wow,” I say, and then she snaps her eyes back open.
“Fuckin’ eejit! We are having sex and we aren’t together? I’m no fuckin’ slag, damn it!”
“No, you’re not,” I agree.
“Arsehole.”
“For sure,” I say.
When she glances up at me, she grins and I smile back, but then her smile drops as she sets me with a look. “You have to tell him though.”
I shrug my shoulders before I pick up both trays. “I don’t see a reason to tell him that I’m a virgin. It isn’t like we are having sex.”
“Yet,” Fiona adds pointing a knife at me.
“Yet,” I say with a smile. “When the time comes, I’ll tell him.”
She nods and goes back to cutting but when I turn to head to the bar to put everything up, I see the last two people I want to see at that moment. Declan is standing with wide eyes, looking completely gorgeous with a jar of what looks like Goober. While I am excited to see him and even more excited to see a can of Goober, I can’t help but assume he heard what I said. And judging by my Aunt Shelia’s expression, it’s safe to say she did, too.
And there goes the trays.
Fuck me.
Crashing at my feet, fruit goes everywhere as Fiona yells, “What the hell—oh crap.” I look back at her with wide eyes, my legs drenched in the juices while my face burns with embarrassment, and all she does is shrugs.
“Hiya, Ma! Declan.”
Declan doesn’t say anything as Aunt Shelia comes to my rescue, fussing over me and helping me clean up. I can’t look at him. My heart is pounding in my chest, my hands shaky, and I have no clue what to say. I planned this to be different. I thought we’d be lying in the afterglow of my first time, and I would tell him that way. I’m beyond embarrassed by my inexperience, and I sure as hell didn’t want my aunt and boyfriend to know this.
