My brows come together as a tear escapes, and I’m surprised it doesn’t freeze to my face, it’s so cold. “What? I didn’t lie about anything else.”
“Seth said your dad ruined Caleb’s career.”
I pause, my face twisting in even more confusion, if that is even possible. “What? No, he didn’t.”
But Jace nods his head before bringing his phone out of his pocket and clicking a few things. He hands it to me, and I take it, looking down at the screen. When I see Caleb’s name, I’m sure my heart is going to burst through my chest and fall to the ground. Jace contacted him? He talked to him? Fucking hell.
Jace Sinclair: Hey dude, don’t know if you remember me, but we played in the Junior Worlds together. I saw your name on another friend’s comments and was wondering what the hell happen to you? Hope all is well. Africa looks badass.
Caleb Rutherford: Hey man! Yeah, I remember, hope all is well with you, dude. I for real just saw a blog post about you. You’re doing big things, dude, that’s awesome!
Jace Sinclair: Thanks man, but what happened to you? I was sure we’d be in the NHL together sooner rather than later.
Caleb Rutherford: Dude, right? I wish! I got involved with this family and shit went bad. I quit the league. Instead of jumping back in, I just said fuck it and left. Guess my heart wasn’t into it.
Jace Sinclair: Got involved?
Caleb Rutherford: Dude, you wouldn’t believe me if I told you but the dad is fucking Benedict Haverbrooke, and I knew that after what happened, I wasn’t going anywhere. Their words, not mine.
Jace Sinclair: Sucks, bro, but listen hit me up if you are ever in Nashville.
Caleb Rutherford: Absolutely, dude, good luck.
When my tears fall onto the screen of his phone, I can’t believe what I’m seeing. What I’m reading. “You contacted him?” I ask, my tears falling faster down my face.
“I had to know the truth.”
I look up then, my lip wobbling as I push his phone into his chest. “I told you the truth. I don’t know what he is talking about, but my dad wouldn’t do that—not for me. He loved Caleb.”
“You may not think your dad loves you, but come on, Avery. With everything that happened, how could he not retaliate?”
“Because he didn’t know!” I scream, my body shaking as my breath whooshes in and out of my body. “No one knew. I didn’t tell them what he did because Matty told me that if I did—” I pause, my throat tight as I shake my head. How do I admit this? How do I tell him this? Looking up, I feel my lip tremble as my tears fall in a rush. “That he’d kill me if Caleb went down for what happened. I believed him and kept my mouth shut.”
Everything hurts, and this is why I didn’t ever want to talk about this. It’s all so embarrassing, such a painful memory, and I hate it. I hate who I was, that I allowed people to do that to me. That I didn’t stand up for myself, tell Matty to stuff it, and bring Caleb down. I let him get away with hurting me, almost killing me, and that’s something I have to live with. But I learned from it, I fought through it, and I’m better now. I am. I’m going to be okay.
But when I see Jace’s face, suddenly, I’m worried I won’t be.
Tears are in his eyes as he slowly shakes his head. “I don’t know, Avery. I hate this, I do, but you have to understand. This is my career, and while I love you and you are everything to me, I’m scared.”
Dropping my bag, I wrap my arms around him, pressing my nose into his chest. “No, you have nothing to be scared of. I won’t let anything happen to you. I promise.”
Taking me by my shoulders, he pulls me back, holding me at arm’s length. The look in his eyes hurts. Physically hurts. My heart, it just stops, breaking into pieces before falling into my gut, dissolving away into nothingness. His jaw clenches, the emotion, the pain, apparent on his face. “Avery, I don’t know if I can believe that. The proof is right here.” He brings his phone back out, the conversation on it taunting me.
“I don’t know what that is because I can promise you, my dad did not do that. He never knew and he loved Caleb, still talked to him after everything.”
But Jace shakes his head. “But yet, Caleb claims he quit ’cause of your dad, your family, and they loved him. They don’t know me. I’m nothing to them. So what does that mean for me?”
“It means nothing because all that matters is us. They don’t matter,” I cry, my tears dripping off my jaw. When his hands drop from my shoulders, I start to cry harder because he isn’t taking me into his arms.
“I don’t know if I can believe that, and that’s what scares me, Avery.”
I move my hand along my cheek, catching my tears. Why is this happening? Why is Caleb lying about my family? Why is he still tormenting me? Damn it. As apprehension fills my body, I know what this means. As much as I don’t want to say it, give it voice, I ask, “So, what? You’re breaking up with me?”
I’m surprised when he shrugs. “I don’t know.”
My face scrunches up, my tears coming faster. “You don’t know?”
He shakes his head. “I don’t. I need time to think. So you go, and we’ll talk when you come back.”
“But how does that make sense?” I shriek, my heart hurting. “Either end it or don’t. Don’t drag me along, letting me think the worst.”
“No, don’t do that,” he barks back at me. “Give me time. You’ve lied, you’ve held back shit. The least you can do is give me time to think.”
I shake my head, because I refuse to be walked all over. “If you want me, stay with me. Forgive me because I’ve apologized. Believe I lied, if that’s what you want to call it. But I did it because of what it did to me. I’m telling the truth about my dad. And Caleb is a lying bastard, I can promise you that,” I hiss out, my tears falling into my mouth as I talk. “But if you don’t want me, if I don’t mean enough to you, and you’re too scared to love me because of some lies from people who don’t even matter, then let me go.”
“That’s not fair,” he seethes, his eyes wild. “I need time. I need to sort through this.”
“Sort through what?”
“The truth!” he yells back, and when a tear rolls down his cheek, I’m done.
“Seth said your dad ruined Caleb’s career.”
I pause, my face twisting in even more confusion, if that is even possible. “What? No, he didn’t.”
But Jace nods his head before bringing his phone out of his pocket and clicking a few things. He hands it to me, and I take it, looking down at the screen. When I see Caleb’s name, I’m sure my heart is going to burst through my chest and fall to the ground. Jace contacted him? He talked to him? Fucking hell.
Jace Sinclair: Hey dude, don’t know if you remember me, but we played in the Junior Worlds together. I saw your name on another friend’s comments and was wondering what the hell happen to you? Hope all is well. Africa looks badass.
Caleb Rutherford: Hey man! Yeah, I remember, hope all is well with you, dude. I for real just saw a blog post about you. You’re doing big things, dude, that’s awesome!
Jace Sinclair: Thanks man, but what happened to you? I was sure we’d be in the NHL together sooner rather than later.
Caleb Rutherford: Dude, right? I wish! I got involved with this family and shit went bad. I quit the league. Instead of jumping back in, I just said fuck it and left. Guess my heart wasn’t into it.
Jace Sinclair: Got involved?
Caleb Rutherford: Dude, you wouldn’t believe me if I told you but the dad is fucking Benedict Haverbrooke, and I knew that after what happened, I wasn’t going anywhere. Their words, not mine.
Jace Sinclair: Sucks, bro, but listen hit me up if you are ever in Nashville.
Caleb Rutherford: Absolutely, dude, good luck.
When my tears fall onto the screen of his phone, I can’t believe what I’m seeing. What I’m reading. “You contacted him?” I ask, my tears falling faster down my face.
“I had to know the truth.”
I look up then, my lip wobbling as I push his phone into his chest. “I told you the truth. I don’t know what he is talking about, but my dad wouldn’t do that—not for me. He loved Caleb.”
“You may not think your dad loves you, but come on, Avery. With everything that happened, how could he not retaliate?”
“Because he didn’t know!” I scream, my body shaking as my breath whooshes in and out of my body. “No one knew. I didn’t tell them what he did because Matty told me that if I did—” I pause, my throat tight as I shake my head. How do I admit this? How do I tell him this? Looking up, I feel my lip tremble as my tears fall in a rush. “That he’d kill me if Caleb went down for what happened. I believed him and kept my mouth shut.”
Everything hurts, and this is why I didn’t ever want to talk about this. It’s all so embarrassing, such a painful memory, and I hate it. I hate who I was, that I allowed people to do that to me. That I didn’t stand up for myself, tell Matty to stuff it, and bring Caleb down. I let him get away with hurting me, almost killing me, and that’s something I have to live with. But I learned from it, I fought through it, and I’m better now. I am. I’m going to be okay.
But when I see Jace’s face, suddenly, I’m worried I won’t be.
Tears are in his eyes as he slowly shakes his head. “I don’t know, Avery. I hate this, I do, but you have to understand. This is my career, and while I love you and you are everything to me, I’m scared.”
Dropping my bag, I wrap my arms around him, pressing my nose into his chest. “No, you have nothing to be scared of. I won’t let anything happen to you. I promise.”
Taking me by my shoulders, he pulls me back, holding me at arm’s length. The look in his eyes hurts. Physically hurts. My heart, it just stops, breaking into pieces before falling into my gut, dissolving away into nothingness. His jaw clenches, the emotion, the pain, apparent on his face. “Avery, I don’t know if I can believe that. The proof is right here.” He brings his phone back out, the conversation on it taunting me.
“I don’t know what that is because I can promise you, my dad did not do that. He never knew and he loved Caleb, still talked to him after everything.”
But Jace shakes his head. “But yet, Caleb claims he quit ’cause of your dad, your family, and they loved him. They don’t know me. I’m nothing to them. So what does that mean for me?”
“It means nothing because all that matters is us. They don’t matter,” I cry, my tears dripping off my jaw. When his hands drop from my shoulders, I start to cry harder because he isn’t taking me into his arms.
“I don’t know if I can believe that, and that’s what scares me, Avery.”
I move my hand along my cheek, catching my tears. Why is this happening? Why is Caleb lying about my family? Why is he still tormenting me? Damn it. As apprehension fills my body, I know what this means. As much as I don’t want to say it, give it voice, I ask, “So, what? You’re breaking up with me?”
I’m surprised when he shrugs. “I don’t know.”
My face scrunches up, my tears coming faster. “You don’t know?”
He shakes his head. “I don’t. I need time to think. So you go, and we’ll talk when you come back.”
“But how does that make sense?” I shriek, my heart hurting. “Either end it or don’t. Don’t drag me along, letting me think the worst.”
“No, don’t do that,” he barks back at me. “Give me time. You’ve lied, you’ve held back shit. The least you can do is give me time to think.”
I shake my head, because I refuse to be walked all over. “If you want me, stay with me. Forgive me because I’ve apologized. Believe I lied, if that’s what you want to call it. But I did it because of what it did to me. I’m telling the truth about my dad. And Caleb is a lying bastard, I can promise you that,” I hiss out, my tears falling into my mouth as I talk. “But if you don’t want me, if I don’t mean enough to you, and you’re too scared to love me because of some lies from people who don’t even matter, then let me go.”
“That’s not fair,” he seethes, his eyes wild. “I need time. I need to sort through this.”
“Sort through what?”
“The truth!” he yells back, and when a tear rolls down his cheek, I’m done.