Dr. Hart nodded his head and he and his wife exchanged looks of intense surprise.
“Do you know she has relapsed?” her momma asked in a barely there voice. “Can you tell us why?”
I shook my head, feeling like a piece of shit as her momma shed tears. “I’ve just been in to see her. I haven’t seen her for a while. I don’t… I—” I trailed off, unable to continue.
Dr. Hart laid a supportive hand on my shoulder. I looked down at the simple gesture, and my legs almost buckled. No one had ever comforted me like that before… no one but Pix. Everyone had always feared me because of the crew I was tied to.
Dr. Hart turned to Dr. Lund. “How is she?”
Dr. Lund sighed. “Unresponsive. Closed in. She’s not cooperating, Maxwell. Not at all. At this point, she’s not even speaking. She’s been lying to her friends and kept herself hidden for the last month to keep from anyone finding out about depriving her body of food.”
My heart beat too slow as I listened to the news. Unresponsive. Closed in. Not even speaking. Lied to her friends. Kept hidden. Depriving her body of food.
“We have no idea how to deal with this, Nigel. I can’t believe we’re back here again.” Lexi’s dad looked broken, and he tucked his wife under his arm. His wife, who was inconsolable.
Dr. Lund looked to Dr. Hart and said, “Just like last time, Maxwell. We have to give her time. We both knew losing Daisy could inspire a relapse such as this.”
“Daisy? Who’s Daisy?” I blurted, and Dr. Hart’s eyes darted to mine.
“She was Lexi’s best friend, Austin. They were diagnosed with anorexia around the same time, hospitalized together. They were inseparable.”
An intense fear ran though me at what Dr. Lund had said. “You… you said you lost her? Do you mean she…?” I couldn’t say the word.
“Daisy died this past summer. She relapsed, hid it from everyone… exactly like what Lexi’s been doing…” Mrs. Hart burst into tears, interrupting Dr. Hart. He pulled her close and pressed a swift kiss on her her head. “Daisy’s body couldn’t fight the anorexia anymore and she died of heart failure. She was too thin and her body shut down.” Dr. Hart put a hand on my shoulder. “Austin, Lexi was with her when she died. She held Daisy’s hand until her last breath. I’m afraid Lexi is in grave danger too.”
God! Pix… what have you been through? And why the f**k didn’t you tell me?
Rome suddenly appeared behind me. “Austin, your mamma’s doctor has just been up. They wanted your insurance details.”
I dropped my head in my hands. “Fuck, Rome. I can’t afford it. But I can’t leave Pix either. What the f**k am I supposed to do? I’m so lost.”
Rome stepped closer still and whispered, “I took care of it, man. I know you won’t like that, but you need help. All you gotta do is be here for your family and your girl. Believe me, I know what this shit feels like.”
My head snapped up and I tried to say no to his help. Rome hooked his hand around my nape, pulling me close, and said, “This ain’t no time to be proud, Carillo. Lean on your friends. Lean on me. This is you getting to say your final good-bye to the woman who gave you life and to inspire hope in the woman you wanna spend the rest of your life with.”
Tears this time came thick and fast, and I gripped onto Rome for dear life, unloading a shitload of pent-up grief.
After a minute or two, the tears dried, Rome patted me on the back and, turning to Dr. and Mrs. Hart, I said, “I gotta go see my mamma. I’ll be back soon, okay? Tell Pix I’ll be back.”
They both nodded as Rome reluctantly led me away to the ward at then end of the hallway. My friends were all waiting outside: Cass and Jimmy-Don, Ally and Reece, and Molly, holding tight to my baby bro.
Levi lifted his head, eyes huge with fear, as I returned, and I waved him over to join me. “We gotta see Mamma, kid,” I said in a desolate, raspy voice.
Levi stood and, with a braveness I would never have thought possible, he stood by my side and together we entered the room. Dr. Small was there when we walked in, and he gave us a sympathetic smile.
Seeing my mamma hooked up to machines nearly killed me, and I knew this was it. This was when Chiara Carillo was freed from her cage, from the confines of her broken-down body.
“Austin, Levi, I’m sorry to have to tell you this, boys, but there’s nothing more we can do. Your mom will not see out the week. It’s time to make your peace.”
A pained wail ripped from Levi’s chest, and as a unit of two, we hit the sterile Lysol-ed floor, and I wrapped him in my arms. Several feet walking on the hospital tiles sounded behind me, and my friends joined us on the floor, supporting us as we broke.
I glanced to my mamma on the bed, and I could almost hear her say, “Famiglia isn’t always blood, mio caro. Famiglia is built on bridges of love. Famiglia is there for you without condition. Famiglia supports you in your darkest moment of need.”
Levi and I wouldn’t ever be alone. This right here was our famiglia. With one huge exception. But I’d be damned if my Pix didn’t feel this love too. I just had to figure out how to rescue her from herself first.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Austin
Three days later and there was no change. I spent my days and nights here at the hospital, switching from one room to the next. My mamma was in a coma, no change in her condition, and Pix was lost in her head, no change in her either.
“Do you know she has relapsed?” her momma asked in a barely there voice. “Can you tell us why?”
I shook my head, feeling like a piece of shit as her momma shed tears. “I’ve just been in to see her. I haven’t seen her for a while. I don’t… I—” I trailed off, unable to continue.
Dr. Hart laid a supportive hand on my shoulder. I looked down at the simple gesture, and my legs almost buckled. No one had ever comforted me like that before… no one but Pix. Everyone had always feared me because of the crew I was tied to.
Dr. Hart turned to Dr. Lund. “How is she?”
Dr. Lund sighed. “Unresponsive. Closed in. She’s not cooperating, Maxwell. Not at all. At this point, she’s not even speaking. She’s been lying to her friends and kept herself hidden for the last month to keep from anyone finding out about depriving her body of food.”
My heart beat too slow as I listened to the news. Unresponsive. Closed in. Not even speaking. Lied to her friends. Kept hidden. Depriving her body of food.
“We have no idea how to deal with this, Nigel. I can’t believe we’re back here again.” Lexi’s dad looked broken, and he tucked his wife under his arm. His wife, who was inconsolable.
Dr. Lund looked to Dr. Hart and said, “Just like last time, Maxwell. We have to give her time. We both knew losing Daisy could inspire a relapse such as this.”
“Daisy? Who’s Daisy?” I blurted, and Dr. Hart’s eyes darted to mine.
“She was Lexi’s best friend, Austin. They were diagnosed with anorexia around the same time, hospitalized together. They were inseparable.”
An intense fear ran though me at what Dr. Lund had said. “You… you said you lost her? Do you mean she…?” I couldn’t say the word.
“Daisy died this past summer. She relapsed, hid it from everyone… exactly like what Lexi’s been doing…” Mrs. Hart burst into tears, interrupting Dr. Hart. He pulled her close and pressed a swift kiss on her her head. “Daisy’s body couldn’t fight the anorexia anymore and she died of heart failure. She was too thin and her body shut down.” Dr. Hart put a hand on my shoulder. “Austin, Lexi was with her when she died. She held Daisy’s hand until her last breath. I’m afraid Lexi is in grave danger too.”
God! Pix… what have you been through? And why the f**k didn’t you tell me?
Rome suddenly appeared behind me. “Austin, your mamma’s doctor has just been up. They wanted your insurance details.”
I dropped my head in my hands. “Fuck, Rome. I can’t afford it. But I can’t leave Pix either. What the f**k am I supposed to do? I’m so lost.”
Rome stepped closer still and whispered, “I took care of it, man. I know you won’t like that, but you need help. All you gotta do is be here for your family and your girl. Believe me, I know what this shit feels like.”
My head snapped up and I tried to say no to his help. Rome hooked his hand around my nape, pulling me close, and said, “This ain’t no time to be proud, Carillo. Lean on your friends. Lean on me. This is you getting to say your final good-bye to the woman who gave you life and to inspire hope in the woman you wanna spend the rest of your life with.”
Tears this time came thick and fast, and I gripped onto Rome for dear life, unloading a shitload of pent-up grief.
After a minute or two, the tears dried, Rome patted me on the back and, turning to Dr. and Mrs. Hart, I said, “I gotta go see my mamma. I’ll be back soon, okay? Tell Pix I’ll be back.”
They both nodded as Rome reluctantly led me away to the ward at then end of the hallway. My friends were all waiting outside: Cass and Jimmy-Don, Ally and Reece, and Molly, holding tight to my baby bro.
Levi lifted his head, eyes huge with fear, as I returned, and I waved him over to join me. “We gotta see Mamma, kid,” I said in a desolate, raspy voice.
Levi stood and, with a braveness I would never have thought possible, he stood by my side and together we entered the room. Dr. Small was there when we walked in, and he gave us a sympathetic smile.
Seeing my mamma hooked up to machines nearly killed me, and I knew this was it. This was when Chiara Carillo was freed from her cage, from the confines of her broken-down body.
“Austin, Levi, I’m sorry to have to tell you this, boys, but there’s nothing more we can do. Your mom will not see out the week. It’s time to make your peace.”
A pained wail ripped from Levi’s chest, and as a unit of two, we hit the sterile Lysol-ed floor, and I wrapped him in my arms. Several feet walking on the hospital tiles sounded behind me, and my friends joined us on the floor, supporting us as we broke.
I glanced to my mamma on the bed, and I could almost hear her say, “Famiglia isn’t always blood, mio caro. Famiglia is built on bridges of love. Famiglia is there for you without condition. Famiglia supports you in your darkest moment of need.”
Levi and I wouldn’t ever be alone. This right here was our famiglia. With one huge exception. But I’d be damned if my Pix didn’t feel this love too. I just had to figure out how to rescue her from herself first.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Austin
Three days later and there was no change. I spent my days and nights here at the hospital, switching from one room to the next. My mamma was in a coma, no change in her condition, and Pix was lost in her head, no change in her either.
